The Problem With Self-Inserts Is

by manga.geek.3

Life-long best friends and anime nerds, Sam and Tori are unexpectedly dropped into the Naruto universe. How will they survive without wifi? What will they eat? How many times can they embarrass themselves in front of hot men? But also..why in the world did they end up there in the first place? (Crack-fic, bursting with fan service and anime jokes. But we promise, there is a plot!)

5. Chapter 5

Chapter Five: ...That Eventually A Call to Adventure Must Break Up the Fun

If Sam and Victoria could have been called up to imagine the best three days to spend in a world without internet or Disneyland, their next few days in Konoha would have been pretty close to their hypothetical itinerary. There were a few more light-hearted shopping trips for groceries and hairbrushes and more pencils. They got to tour some of the iconic buildings including the mostly-empty Academy. A sneaky Victoria had managed to snap a few photos for Sam with her phone of Sam sitting in the fabled desks. They did hike back up to Hokage Mountain one day - this time with plenty of fresh water and a nice picnic lunch - just so that they could soak in the sight of the beautiful valley. On Wednesday, Sam managed to catch sight of a pair of full-on jounins practicing and had floated for hours after still soaking in the awesomeness of having witnessed actual ninjutsu. On Thursday, they caught another play and Tori got to learn how to cook on a teppan. And through the whole week, they got to spend good chunks of the days relaxing in Kakashi's apartment, writing down their adventures and chatting, as they most loved to do. Their host was talkative and then silent in turns. His humor fit surprisingly well with theirs and he seemed most comfortable teasing them or exchanging stories.

It was kind of weird, to Tori. She wasn't particularly used to hanging out with men that were both hot and had an attractive personality. It didn't really help her with getting over the crush, but the close proximity demanded she at least somewhat deal with it. Her main method at this point was the continuing question of his availability. After all, if she knew of what OTP he was meant to be, it would be so, so much easier to convince her little heart to just be happy for his happiness and stop the nonsense whispers of "he laughed at your joke there, he must think you're pretty." Victoria's more pessimistic mind was, for once, surprisingly reluctant to remind her flibberty-gibbet heart that men who were hot beyond all reason, and had strong careers, and awesome personalities just didn't go for the fat girl who flubbed out of their own career path and was way too high-maintenance. ..But if she got any more blushy, it would have to.. Tori didn't really like it when her anxiety-sick mind beat up her heart, and she could sense it was on the horizon. She had made it to this age in life having never really had a boyfriend because Victoria dreaded the idea of someone discovering she had a crush on them. The rejection of her unchosen feelings, she was utterly certain, would be too hard to deal with - especially because she always felt so helpless and dumb for being caught up in such intense feelings for someone so clearly out of her league. (Because, inevitably, it was always someone out of her league.) Luckily, Victoria had the unfortunate timing that every time she developed a crush, that person soon ended up in a relationship. Even the celebrities. So she had developed her best method to get it over with: the I'll-ship-you-with-someone-else-because-I-hope-you're-happy-even-if-you're-not-mine method. So if she wanted to get over Kakashi, she just needed to do that now. Simple enough. She even happened to have access to the Naruto-World-Encyclopedia. Samantha would definitely know who Kakashi was meant to end up with and Victoria could begin to divorce her silly daydreams of cute romantic moments with Kakashi and her, and fill the same scenarios in with the right woman. Tori just had to secure a private moment to pick Sam's brain..

Finally, she had the chance that Friday afternoon. Their too-handsome warden had a meeting to attend and so had locked them in his apartment with a sealing jutsu. Tori, feeling restless, had decided to scrub down their borrowed bathroom while Sam sat just outside the door sketching out an anime-version of herself in her awesome new ninja outfit. "So..can you tell me more about Kakashi?" Tori asked lightly. "Like..I know he becomes the teacher-leader of Naruto's team, and he was in the Secret Service thing, but what else do we know? Is he related to anybody in the Boruto gen?" Her very sneaky way of trying to discreetly ask if he gets married sometime soon.

Sneaky Tori may try to be, but Sam was well aware of the hidden question within Tori's words. Samantha thought Kakashi was hot, and his personality was definitely endearing, however, the silver-haired jounin seemed far more into Tori than Sam, and with the knowledge that Tori thought he was ridiculously attractive, Sam knew when to back off. Even if she were perhaps slightly jealous her friend was getting a love story out of their adventure. Of course, Sam had had one before, so Tori deserved her time.

Pausing in her drawing - frowning that she couldn't quite get the arms right - Samantha held the pencil eraser to her chin as she thought. "Well, he's actually had quite a sad past. His own trials in life make it super sad that Sasuke couldn't see its worth in helping him overcome his own anger." Holding the pencil still against the paper, preparing to draw, Samantha pondered where to start, "So, Kakashi's mother died… some time we were never informed of... We only know that it's happened. His dad died by suicide when Kakashi was four due to the whole village hating on him because he put the worth of his comrades lives over the mission itself. Even his comrades thought he was in the wrong! Can you believe that?" Sam shook her head, going back to sketching while she talked.

"So, after his dad died, poor Kakashi had adopted the idea of the village. The mission is the most important. Actually!" Sam brought the pencil up in an 'aha' moment, "I'm pretty sure he had adopted that idea before his dad killed himself… which is super sad. Anyway…! He had been attending the academy - where he had been somewhat friends with Rin and Obito - but after his father's death, Kakashi graduated after that year was up. And because of the war, Kakashi would go off to war - I'm pretty sure because he was chuunin, he was able to have his own team and be the leader of said team… he was quite the strict leader if I remember correctly… but during that time of throwing himself into the shinobi life, the sneaky Third Hokage recognized Kakashi's need for love, acceptance, and direction and assigned Minato Namikaze - Naruto's dad, by the way - to watch over little Kakashi. So Kakashi ended up on his team where Obito and Rin were his teammates. Obito and Kakashi never got along. Obito was in love with Rin and valued her life above all else, and it wasn't until Obito's death that Kakashi changed.

"Though, right before Obito died, he gave Kakashi his one good eye - because Kakashi had lost his eye earlier that day, and since Obito was dying… yeah… so Kakashi got the sharingan eye, and after that mission, adopted Obito's values. It's kinda where he began to change. But after Rin and Minato died, Kakashi threw himself into the Anbu Black Ops until the Third Hokage, again, was like 'Kakashi needs to get out of the Anbu and really heal his heart. I'll give him a team!' and thus began his time as sensei to Naruto, Sakura and Sasuke! And then there is everything in the future too… like around the Pein arc… but yeah. That's the gist of Kakashi." Samantha smiled widely and waited for Victoria to respond.

Victoria was very used to Samantha's method of storytelling and how she would scatter extra details and spoilers amidst the main points. Lips quirked, Tori leaned against the edge of the bathroom counter and mused over the questions Sam's explanation had left crawling around her mind. "So..up til now, super tragic then. Orphaned young, his only friends died including his sensei..and, hang on, how old did you say he was when his dad died? Four? And then the next year he graduated?"

Samantha nodded. "Yeah, at just five! And was a chunin at six! He's a genius shinobi!"

"And he went to war?" Flabbergasted at the idea, Tori's voice shrieked a little. "At six? Who the crap came up with that as a good idea? Was it the same jerk Hokage that let Naruto be raised on his own? Screw the timeline, I'm gonna kill myself some shinobis! That's insane!" But of course, she wouldn't. Tori was so pacifistic she struggled to even play the slug-bug game. She'd be more likely to try to take the My Little Pony approach to battle: help the enemy face up to their shortcomings and then make them your best friend. Kill with kindness. If the Hokage was in the room she would give him a good verbal dressing down and then forcibly help plan a whole series of lifestyle changes to improve his behavior. Starting with an orphaned shinobi outreach program.

"Eh, well… I mean… it is quite messed up. But I have no doubt there's behind the scenes with the Hokage's decision that we just don't know about. After all, I personally feel that Kishimoto failed at making Naruto stupid. That kid is far smarter than he seems. Lack of parents I think is a huge cause for this, actually. Anyway… yeah…" Samantha gave a short laugh, scratching her arm, "You'd be dead before you could even get close to the Hokage, sadly."

Tossing her cleaning rag in the sink, Victoria stomped over to take a seated position like Sam's. She ran a hand through her hair, upsetting the loose bun that had held it up out of the way while she cleaned. She sighed gustily, trying to force out some of the tangled up anger she felt. "I just..don't get how you're so okay with it. Well, accepting rather," she corrected. "It's awful enough just in a story, but this is their reality. They are real people. And they seem to think it's honorable and awesome to send kindergartners -Kindergartners! - on death missions. I mean, we have friends from high school with kids that age. Things shouldn't be this way. It's so wrong. It can't be like this. It can't." Tears of frustration and sorrow pricked at Victoria's eyes. "What's the name of the author?" She asked raspily.

"Masashi, Kishimoto," Samantha replied, her brow furrowed. She was a little disturbed by Tori's perception of her feelings, "And it's not like I'm okay with everything. It's just… hmm, how do I explain it…" Leaning against the bathtub wall, Samantha closed her eyes in thought before staring at the ground as she continued, "I suppose, in a sense, it still feels unimaginable. I watched all of Naruto, and then read the manga afterwards, and… as I'm sure you know, when you read something, you just accept that that's the way the world works. That's how it was created by the author, and all the events that happen, happen to induce the plotline of the story. Or for character building. Not to mention the fact that we can't change anything that's happened. I guess… I just accept that that's how it is because, that's what happened before. I mean… no one wanted it to really be that way, which is why as time passed all the way into Boruto's world, Naruto had changed the way of shinobi enough that there was no need for genin to arise from even a six year old." She shrugged in her thoughts, "It's how this world works. It's crappy, but that's how it happened. That's not to say I don't find it terribly tragic, though! But I feel like it'd have more of an impact on me if I had been present for the situation and not just a distant bystander. And by saying distant is in no means modest, either. After all… the Naruto universe, up until recently, had all been fiction."

Victoria reached over and gave Samantha's knee a soft squeeze. "I'm sorry. I don't blame you, Sam. Of course not. I just..sometimes it makes me so angry that people glorify violence so much. And I know that in a real world you would never ever think it was cool for kids to fight. I just can't stop imaging how horrible it must be. And..how horrible it must have been. For these people. These real people." She let her head fall back against the wall and it gave a dull thump. "I'm gonna pray for like two hours straight tonight for every single traumatized character I ever read or wrote about. On the off chance that somewhere all the fiction is real. And that Masashi Kishimoto Guy? He's gonna get the most prayers of all. Cuz he gotta shape up or he'll join Hitler and Satan on the Victoria Hate List."

Sam threw her head back and laughed, "Looking at the Naruto universe compared to other author's? If anything, you should be praying for Stephen King! Now that guy… he is truly messed up." She shuddered at the thought of the horrific evil clown. Sam couldn't even think the name because It creeped her out that much. "And what about all those other horror books? Or the Hunger Games. Or even Ender's Game?" Giggling once more, Samantha lightly poked Tori's arm, "There are some seriously disturbed people in the world, eh?"

If Victoria had to describe the sound from her lips, she would have labeled it a tragic laugh. "Like me?" She pointed out. "I did some pretty awful things to characters before…although rarely when they were younger than twelve. I guess I was a tiny bit decent as an author.."

Samantha laughed again, because Tori was actually an amazingly decent human being with super high morals, "I wouldn't say you're a disturbed person. I mean, it's natural to want to read about a character who had a hard childhood or past and to see them rise above those challenges. It's what gives us hope, right? I mean… for every storyline and the outcome of a plot, and for every feeling behind characters' morals is, to some degree, how we feel about the world ourselves. I mean… if a character believes that he or she can overcome hardship against all odds, no matter what, that's something that the author themselves feel. Though," here, Sam lowered her voice to almost a whisper, "I personally feel like, when it comes to the main characters of the story arc, those are the author's morals and points of view, not the idea's coming from the bad guy's point of view. Then again, if you're disturbed, than so am I. I've written some pretty awful things myself." She thought back to all those fanfictions she'd written. Her poor characters! Oi vey.

"Well, I just hope whoever is writing our story here is super nice," Tori quipped. "Maybe Lauren Faust? We could use some peppy MLP-esque luck..". She crinkled her nose playfully. "So. Better tell me about the rest. I've braced my little heart to hear all the horrible things. Dish 'me out, SamSam."

"Eh?" Sam lifted an eyebrow, "Are you sure you want to know?" She gave a nonchalant shrug to Tori's determined waiting, "Well, alright. Basically, Konoha gets attacked a few months from now - I'm not sure the proper timing for that, but it's during the Chunin exams - by Orochimaru and the sand village. This is where Naruto meets Gaara and changes that boy's perception of life, and also where Sarutobi Hiruzen, the Third Hokage, dies. Then, Naruto goes on a training trip for several years with Jiraiya, and when he comes back, he's more than ready to fight the Akatsuki. Oh! And Sasuke defects from the village soon after the attack on Konoha." Samantha twitched her feet, "About threeish or so years from now, Naruto learns sage mode, right when Pein attacks. So, naturally he defeats the guy, and all those whose lives were taken, are given back to them. Naruto's power of talking! Talk-no-jutsu as some people call it," she giggled.

"But anyway, Kakashi had died and been brought back to life, and this is where he is truly able to resolve his relationship with his father. I guess they chatted in the afterlife, or… limbo… wherever they were at.. And then soon after that, the Akatsuki declare war on the world, all the shinobi band together, Naruto learns to control Kurama's chakra, and during the war, they become friends and Naruto freely uses the nine-tails chakra from there on out. Afterwards, Tsunade hands the hat to Kakashi - because she was the fifth Hokage - and years later, after Naruto has had two kids with Hinata: Boruto and Himawari, Kakashi hands the hat to Naruto and Naruto becomes the seventh Hokage. Naturally, because of the war and all shinobi banding together, they've come to a time of peace where all the villages cooperate together." Samantha blew out a breath and smiled, "Then Boruto's story happened! Though, it's still quite a new series, so there's not much info to go on there, apart from Boruto finally overcoming his drama with Naruto. Dude… that was one friggin' awesome fight, by the way! You reeeeeeeally should watch it!"

Victoria chewed over the details. About halfway through the telling she had stolen Sam's notebook and on a fresh page wrote down the main points of the story that she needed to remember. "So is Kakashi around still in Boruto's time? Or is he some old moldy reference that's just a footnote?"

"Moldy reference?" Sam sputtered with a laugh, "Nah, Kakashi is very much alive. Just, not as Hokage."

"That's kinda nice. Good to have a character you know won't die that you can emotionally invest in. ..Does he have a kid?" Oh she was so casual..

Sam snorted. It was easy to see through Tori's casual question. "Not that I know of. The subject had never been touched on nor given any indication that he has a kid or that he even got married." Sam looked slyly at Tori, "Are you hoping to marry him?"

Victoria snorted derisively, but the effect was totally blown by the high blush on her cheeks. Man, she really needed to work on controlling that! "Noooooo," she drawled. "That's silly. He's a book character, first off, and way outta my league. Plus he's not a member of my faith. And there's the whole 'we aren't supposed to exist here' thing. Probably a deal-breaker I'm thinking, if you have to plan on suddenly disappearing in a haze of glowy lights. Though I'm willing to bend on the other three." She crinkled her nose pertly at Sam and handed back the drawing. She had redrawn the arms for her, but there was no way she was attempting the hands.

Sam thought on those reasons of Tori's, as her rebuttal about the first three were caught on her tongue by Tori's last remark. "What if… what if we never make it back? That's always a possibility. I've grabbed that marble a bazillion times since we got here, but nothing's happened. So… you might just get your chance to marry the Copy-Cat Ninja!" Sam's laugh fell a little flat as the reality that they may never go home again fell on her shoulders. If they never made it back home… what would they do? They'd have to actually find jobs so they could survive (or Sam would just mooch off of Tori if she married Kakashi). She laughed at her own thought, because the ridiculousness of not having her own income was, well, ridiculous. The question would then be, how would they support themselves in a world completely unlike their own.

"Because apparently Kakashi is not just a book character." Sam spread her arms around the bathroom in explanation of its own reality.

"Alright, I'll give you that one," Victoria groused with her usual dramatic humor. "But..we can't deny how ridiculously fine that man is. So point two and four still holds us firmly in the 'no point in thinking about it' camp." Victoria nodded firmly as though the downward jerk of her chin would be a hammer nailing down the reality of that into her brain and heart. "No more flirting allowed." Slipping back to her feet she began to clean up the mess of abandoned cleaning supplies. "Although, you've done remarkably well at that." The wiggling thought Victoria had pushed aside for the last week guiltily rose up and pressed at her lips until she had to say it. "You're a pretty good flirter unless you like the guy.." Victoria rubbed the back of her hand against her nose, unconsciously hiding her face from Sam's. "Which I don't know how I didn't notice 'til now." Reason number five. The only man worth losing Sam's friendship for would be Jesus.

"Ahem, correction. I can't flirt with guys that I think are ridiculously hot. It's a problem, really…" Sam pouted, before smiling again, "No flirting allowed? I don't know if that's even possible to abide by. Besides, if you wanna flirt, I say, go for it! The guy is hot, for goodness sakes." Sam stuck her tongue out cheekily at Tori. Man, she really did that a lot. Speaking of the man, "I wonder what's taking Kakashi so long. I wonder if he'd know if we snooped around his place." Now, Samantha didn't plan to snoop, she just sometimes spoke her random thoughts aloud, however brief or unrealistic the thought could be.

Feeling a little reassured by Sam's tone - it would seem that Sam, while finding Kakashi attractive, must not be head-over-tail twitterpated like Victoria feared she was - Tori tucked away the guilty feeling but kept the resolve to be less invested. It really could only end badly, anyway. But at least it'd only be her own heart hurt by the inevitable rejection. (It really never occurred to her that Kakashi would be anything other than embarrassed or slightly flattered by her making moon-eyes at him.) "It's probably about his team assignments," Victoria offered, "And maybe what to do with us. My guess is we are about to be relocated." Hence her need to clean up their half of the little apartment. "It probably is your last chance to snoop if you want, but it's not like you'll find anything especially useful. Any evidence of terrible secrets are probably written down and you don't have your English:Japanese dictionary." And he kept his dirty books out where anyone could see them. She doubted there was anything else hiding in his room other than evidence that he wasn't, in fact, made of shinobi blue fabric but rather had human skin underneath it.

Samantha shrugged a second time, "Yeah, that's true. I don't know a lot of Japanese, but I just wanna walk around to see if he's got any secret alcoves. I mean… how cool would that be?" She rubbed her hands together, as if rolling some playdoh. "In any case, I doubt he's learning which team he has. That didn't happen 'till the day after graduation. We'd know it was after graduation because the night before there's a tiny scare - when Naruto accidentally steals the Forbidden Scroll." Standing up, Samantha stretched before looking at Tori once again. "Anyway, what shall we do until his royal hotness comes back?"

Victoria thought about that for a minute. "I'm kinda hungry," she confessed. "Let's go make some lunch." And with a plan now made, they skipped forward to do so. The conversation lingered in both their minds though and poor Tori found her newly claimed resolve horribly tested by the unfathomable look Kakashi leveled at her when she greeted his return with a cherry hello and a piping hot grilled cheese. Her heart was still pounding in an uneven, triplet pattern when the shinobi herded the two of them out the door and across the now-familiar city.

"You'll like this, Samantha-Chan," Kakashi declared easily, walking at her side as Victoria lagged behind. "I have a surprise for you."

Samantha perked up, her heart beating a little faster, and not necessarily because of her excitement. Sam could appreciate a hot man when she saw one. "A surprise?" She asked, "Do I get to know what it is right now?" She couldn't help but be her cheeky self and smile while lifting her eyebrows. Sam loved surprises, despite the pressure she always put on the giver to reveal what it was. That was half the fun.

Kakashi held a hand to his heart with a touch of exaggerated drama. "You think I, a shinobi of the Hidden Leaf village, would betray such a valuable secret?"

"Uh… yes?" Sam's smile betrayed her teasing, "'Cause I'm sure you must know how well I keep secrets." She smiled and winked at the jounin, bumping her elbow against his.

He stroked his chin thoughtfully. "You are a very shrewd secret-keeper. It is likely you could be trusted," he agreed. "But information like I have is very valuable.." His silver eye twinkled as he challenged her: "What do you have to trade, Samantha-Chan?"

"To trade?" Samantha blinked, thinking thoughtfully, "Well, I'm sure I know a card game that you don't know. That's very valuable knowledge, ya know." She said matter of fact, biting her smiling lips.

"You wouldn't offer me a secret?" He asked just a little too-innocently.

"Ah, well, you should never ask a lady to reveal her secrets." Sam said, cheekily. "Besides, what kind of secret would interest a ninja? Serious secrets? Revealing secrets? Cheeky secrets? There's just too many!"

"The same kind that interests a friend," Kakashi said easily, his gaze watching the crowd of the market passing in front of them. "Although I'm intrigued by the prospect of cheeky secrets. Especially if they are revealing..". This time, his elbow crossed the gap to bump hers.

"You really want to know?" Samantha questioned slyly, "do you really want to know?" Samantha couldn't help herself walking closer to the guy. It was nice to be flirted with once in a while. Especially by someone as hot as him. It was surprisingly easy to do so with Kakashi as well, considering Sam could never consciously flirt with anyone. Just this once Sam thought, consciously flirt just this once. Tori has the potential to like him far more than me.

They rounded the corner of market and began the path to the woods and training grounds. "Yes. And tell me what I want. What I really, really want..to know about you, the mysterious Samantha Winters." There was a different kind of challenge in his words now. It wasn't just playfulness and the omni-present flirtatiousness of Kakashi in his voice now. It was like he knew something and he was daring her to confess to him that she knew the same secret he did.

Briefly noting the direction they were headed, Samantha looked over at Kakashi, giving him a calculating stare. The implication in his tone left more questions than it answered. It took a moment to realize that her mouth had hung open a little, and Sam abruptly closed it, looking ahead while she thought of a response. Unsure of what Kakashi was asking, even if her mind immediately went to the dimension-travelling that she and Tori had gone through, Samantha remembered a piece of her that she decided Kakashi could know. Getting closer to the jounin, Samantha threw her voice into a conspiratorial whisper, "Often times, when I'm sitting down and someone passes in front of me, I purposely trip them because I find it hilarious." She'd tried to keep a straight face through the whole thing, but ended up grinning by the end, unable to help the giggle that came afterwards.

His eye narrowed at her for a moment but then the skin about it crinkled and it was obvious that a smile lurked beneath Kakashi's iconic blue mask. "You are a dangerous woman, Samantha-Chan," he teased. "I shall have to watch my feet around you."

"Yeah you will!" Samantha bolstered with a laugh, "And yet, I'm very much like a ninja! You'll never see it coming." She bumped shoulders with Kakashi again, "So. Since I gave away such a precious secret, what's yours?" After all, Samantha did not forget the original reason the silver haired Kakashi had initially stepped her way.

"I've arranged a practice bout," he declared, his hands grasping behind his back in an easy parade-rest sort of way as they walked. "You will get to see Might Guy get his..posterior bruised." He gave a shooting glance over one shoulder at their lagging companion as though to explain the rather tame language.

Sam nearly stopped short. "We get to see Might Guy fight? And who is his sparring partner?" Samantha eyed the masked man, her suspicions and electric excitement buzzing within her, "Is it gonna be you?"

"Well it would be rather embarrassing if my rival was defeated by anyone else."

They crossed the wide gate that stood open: marking the boundaries of the practice grounds. A small crowd had already gathered: word sped fast aiming professional spies. Kakashi halted and let Samantha soak it in.

"What's going on?" Victoria asked, finally catching up on Sam's other side.

"We're gonna watch Kakashi and Might Guy spar!" Samantha kept her eyes on the training ground before looking at Tori. "This is gonna be so cool!" Sam tapped Tori's arm several times in her excitement. As they began to walk forward, Sam asked Kakashi, "Is there somewhere we should be standing?" Her fingers twitched, and Sam couldn't help the slight bounce in her step. Farther off in the crowd, they could see Might Guy doing stretches with his team nearby, Rock Lee pumping his fists with what they could assume was encouragement and Tenten and Neji shaking their heads, Tenten holding a hand to her face. Might Guy must really be as bad as he was in the manga. Sam watched the team before gazing at the rest of the crowd, waiting for Kakashi's response.

He gave an elegant shrug. "Just so you get a good view. Maybe not on any high spots. Might Guy doesn't always look." There was always an element of danger in watching the bouts, after all. It was frowned on, of course, to throw logs and other debris at bystanders, but accidents had happened before. Reaching up, he casually ruffled his own hair and corrected the lay of his forehead protector. "You'll be my cheerleaders?"

"Cheerleaders?" Sam perked up, "Well, I can't say we'll have a unified routine, but we'll definitely be cheering you on! Right Tori?" She turned towards Victoria, rolling on her heels, feeling slightly antsy. It was going to be epic to see the two jounin fight: and Sam was willing to bet on Kakashi, absolutely. He had far more winnings than losses according to Might Guy.

"Totes ma goats!" Victoria quipped, smiling widely. "Knock 'em dead, Kakashi-San! Well..not really dead, right?"

"Right," he assured easily. Flipping out a shuriken, he gave it a fancy little toss and then caught it with a head tilt and a grin. "This'll be fun." He sauntered off to the center of the field where he gave Might Guy a cheery wave.

Grabbing Sam's arm, Victoria pulled her eagerly over towards the rest of the crowd so that they could join in the lines of spectators that had started to ring the fields. Victoria found them a space next to two boys - probably ones from Naruto's class. They did look vaguely familiar. One had a puffy light brown afro and the other a permanent scowl, like he looked at life as all one big drag. She noticed both boys proudly wore very clean and shiny forehead protectors. And now that she noticed, it looked like there were several preteens paired off as though with their parents, all of them sporting the new headbands. It must be graduation day, she mused. I wonder if Kakashi timed things just to get a big crowd. I know he's cheeky, but is he a bit of a show-off too? Suddenly a cheer went up through the crowd as the spectators all scooted into a large, loose circle around the two ninjas. The two muscular men waved to the crowd before seriously settling into matching stances. Tori grinned nervously at Sam. "Are you sure you're ready for this?" she asked lightly.

"Are you kidding?" Sam said, eyes riveted, "I look up karate tournaments just to watch people fight. It's so cool!" She waited with baited breath as the two jounin made the seal of confrontation. It felt like forever passed in the span of two seconds before Might Guy made a jump for Kakashi, right leg already spinning for the round kick. Kakashi ducked, punching his opponent in the gut, sending Might Guy flying backwards. In another second, Kakashi disappeared before reappearing in front of Might Guy, who had blocked the oncoming left hook, whipping out a kunai which Kakashi blocked, knocking the two jounin apart. They stood still, silent, watching each other, deciphering the best course of action before the two disappeared once again and the clang of kunai could be heard. They appeared and disappeared almost too quick for the naked eye to observe. All Samantha could do was watch in awe, feeling an itch in her bloodstream, her heart pounding with desire to be a part of the action. It's what she felt every time she watched karate tournaments online. It was the thrill of actually knowing correct movements to defend herself in case of being attacked. Every time she practiced her kenpo, her heart raced with that zing of excitement that she was doing something more with her life than wasting it away at work. It gave her a purpose to continue existing in a world where she wasn't really needed. It was at times like this, especially this moment, that Samantha regretted having taken a break with her training. Procrastination was that dreaded nightmare that haunted her every action and with it, embarrassment: for the failure of not completing what she knew without a doubt she could have done. Procrastination and loss of desire. They were the bane of her existence. Perhaps that's what they called depression, but Sam had never been diagnosed.

So, Sam watched, engrossed in the fight.

To their left, a loud crash could be heard, a massive puff of smoke instantly appearing. Kakashi soon popped out of the muggy air, landing on his feet and hand that was free of kunai. The crowd cheered for Kakashi before going silent as wind cleared the smoke away and Might Guy stood in the midst of a decent sized crater, huffing. He then smiled, somehow a slight gleam shining off his teeth as he spoke to his rival. "Heh, as expected of one worthy to be my rival!"

Kakashi didn't move a single muscle, every line of his slim figure alert and attuned to the battle. "Those sound like words of defeat, my friend," he declared lightly. "Are you tired so soon, old man?" He gave Might Guy a cheeky grin.

Might Guy's fists clenched tightly, and Sam could picture his internal "My rival is so cool!" speech that was sometimes noted in the manga and anime. "If you think that's all I've got, you have another thing coming!" Smashing his hands together, Might Guy once again smiled, lifting his eyes to gleam at Kakashi. Then, almost impossibly, Might Guy was gone from his spot and smashing a blocked fist at Kakashi like the speed of light. Or rather, like a jet, flying six-hundred miles an hour. Kakashi countered, sending a kick to the ribs which Might Guy defended with a palm, kunai forgotten from both jounin. Their hand to hand combat fighting commenced, seemingly even matched. It was easier to spot from the spectator's perspective, as the two men stayed in relatively the same spot, blocking blow for blow. Then, as Kakashi ducked from another round kick, he slammed an uppercut on the edge of MIght Guy's jaw, sending him flying backwards, slamming into a tree on the other side, nearly diagonal from where Samantha and Victoria were standing.

It was another second before a man stepped forward from the crowd, a cigarette in the corner of his mouth, Konoha headband proudly resting on his forehead. If that hadn't been a dead giveaway of who the man was, than the beard that ran from ear to ear - not including a goatee - did. Asuma Sarutobi, son of Hiruzen Sarutobi - the Third Hokage, stepped next to Kakashi. "I declare this match officially over," He announced to the crowd as a beat up Might Guy came forward and the two rivals gave the sign of reconciliation.

"Great spar, Kakashi. I'd imagined no less from my great rival."

"Always a pleasure," Kakashi responded, clapping a hand firmly against Might Guy's shoulder in the universal sign of male camaraderie. "We should send you flying into trees more often."

Victoria nudged the paralyzed-with-Joy Sam. "And you call me a cheeky monkey.." she quipped, "Kakashi-San has to the cheekiest thing you've ever seen."

Samantha stiffly walked next to Victoria, replaying the amazing fight in her head, "You've got that right. Kakashi is definitely cheeky."

Tori laughed brightly. "That was..actually pretty fun to watch," she admitted. "There was way more athleticism to it than I thought. I kinda imagined it was gonna all be chakra-ball throwing." Their warden was being congratulated by all the other spectators, so after a moment, the two women found a tree to flop under.

It was Samantha's turn to smile cheekily as she nudged Tori, "See. Fighting is amazing!"

"Yes," she agreed, "When its two super in-control adults that aren't trying to actually kill each other. Then, yes, totally, totally cool." Victoria wrinkled her nose and then with a sigh, flopped backwards on the grass. "Man, I sound like a big, old, stick-in-the-mud." Resting her hand on the soft curve of her tummy, Victoria gazed thoughtfully up at the flashing green leaves above them. "I should do better at the not-worrying and just-enjoying thing..."

Samantha, following suit, gave a breathy laugh at Tori's statement. "You just have lots of feels. Of course you're gonna be a big ol' stick in the mud," Sam waved her hand in the air as she spoke, as if to twirl the leaves, "There has to be someone like you, because you've got someone like me who simply finds it exciting. It's harder for me to take things in. That's why you're good to have around." She winked at Tori.

"Awwwh! Way to be adorably nice!" Victoria declared with only a little extra drama. "I feel instantly inspired and comforted. It's like I found my Gandalf."

"What! Your Gandalf?" Sam replied with mock offense, "Do I look old and grey to you?"

"Well you do have blue hair, Chica," Victoria couldn't help teasing. "But no, you're being all inspiring and nice to me and stuff even though I'm being whiny about our adven - WAIT." Victoria bolted up and swiveled to point accusingly at Samantha. "You made me a main character!" she accused, obviously clearly and deeply offended by the idea. "Not fair! I'm the guide character. I'm always the guide character, we agreed to this! Why are you trying to be the guide character?"

"Guide Character!" Samantha shot up, leaning one hand against the grass as she spoke her incredulous surprise, "I don't wanna be the guide character! How am I the guide character? There's no possible way!" She pouted once more and muttered the unfathomable thought, "I don't wanna be the guide character."

"I know you don't,"' Victoria said. "But..but you are." She gestured around helplessly. "Who's been losing their head this whole time? Me. Who's been calm and chill the whole time? You. Who's doing something they avoid at all possible costs, aka, talking to hot guys? Well, mostly me." Samantha snorted, "You have been too. Maybe we can fix this." The younger woman stroked her chin thoughtfully. "If I were the narrator of this story, how would I make you the main character? I think you need to be kidnapped, Sam. That's the only way you get to be the main character now."

Samantha laughed outright at that, "Kidnapped? That's a bit much… yeah, that'd really suck. Hah! But hmmm… to be a main character… hardship is a must. I feel like we're already going through that… I may be calm, but that's just 'cause I deal with crazy stuff that way…" Sam scratched her temple, thoughtfully pondering what she could do. She watched as the ninja paraded around Kakashi, before an idea began to spark, "What if," Sam began, "I continued my karate training here? Do you think I could get a sensei?" Her eyes sparkled as she turned to Tori. "That's gotta be the way to not be a guide character! Right?"

Victoria thought for a second and then smiled wider. "Yeah. Yeah, it totally would!" She gave a little victory dance. "Totally! You be a ninja, then I can just be your adorable animal sidekick. That will so work." She playfully stuck her hands up, making little rabbit ears. "Do you think I could pass as a bunny?"

"You wanna be an animal?" Sam giggled, her brow raised, "Well, I definitely think you could pass as a bunny. Such sweet animals!"

Tori giggled at the ridiculousness of their conversation. "Better not try it then. Everyone will see right through me!" She shook her head and laughed again. "Okay, deal. You're our main character now. I gift you the title, and gladly! But..seriously, would you really take up the ninja stuff? Like..it's kinda dangerous right?"

Samantha tilted her head towards the sky, the bright green of the leaves obscuring her view just a little, "You know… I probably would. Knowing self-defense, first of all, friggin' rocks. Second of all, if I could mold chakra along with that?... Dude… would that even be possible for someone not from this world? But how cool would that be!" Sammy smiled at the thought. "You really think this would make me the main character?"

Victoria laughed. "Well, since this is our real lives, Sammy-Sam-Sam, I think just determining you want to be a main character is what would make you a main character." She resumed her earlier position of laying back and gazing up at the dancing leaves. "And I think you should take back up your kenpo or, ya know, whatever the equivalent is here. Because you are so good at it and it makes you happy but you've put it off since you moved from your old place. We've got nothing else going on. Get back on it!"

"That's a good point… I have been lazy about it, which has made me sad. Kenpo is amazing, ya know!" Her smile was slightly sad when she thought back on that part of her life. There was no reason why she quit apart from procrastination on learning the moves and being embarrassed because she procrastinated. So, Tori was right. Sam needed to get back into her training! "I think I definitely could get back into it. If I could find a sensei. The only person that comes to mind is Hinata. I feel like the Hyuga fighting style is the most similar to kenpo. Except… kenpo has kicks and other self defense moves…" Feeling antsy, Samantha stood up and jiggled her legs, "I've never sparred with an actual partner, either. I would be even worse than a genin!" She laughed at her little joke.

"I could practice some old man tai-chi right next to you," Victoria quipped. "That'd make ya look way cooler by comparison. Cuz you are cool! just.. normal world cool. Not quite ninja cool." She waved a hand at the crowd still scattered around the field. "And we could always just get one of those shiny little kids to fight you. I bet Rock Lee would totally help you train! Kid lives for training."

Samantha thought on that, looking towards the dispersing crowd where Might Guy and his team still stood, though by this point, Kakashi didn't seem to be anywhere in sight. "Rock Lee would probably be quite eager. Though… I don't know if I could do his work ethic," She smiled, "Tenten could be awesome to work with, or Neji… well… probably not as he is now." Holding her hands behind her back, Samantha looked down at Tori, "I'll have to think on it!"

"Don't just think on it: do it!" Tori challenged just like a good guide character would. "We've spent this whole week just having fun. We need to move forward and the journey has to start somewhere. Let it be your Call to Adventure!" (Wouldn't her old lit theory professor be proud of her Joseph Campbell reference?) "Come on, noble protagonist! Go ask Might Guy to hook you up!"

"I just might do that," Sam smiled, "And you know, we really should figure out why we're here. I mean… I highly doubt we're here for no reason." She held a hand to her hip, fingers thrumming, "In any case, I might as well go talk to them." With a shrug, Sam started walking towards Team Guy, feeling more determined than she had in awhile.

Victoria watched Samantha's progress across the field. It was way too far to hear, of course, but the body language was more than words enough. Sam was congratulating Might Guy on his fight. He clearly accepted the praise but then waxed poetic about the mightiness of his rival. The dramatic look over one shoulder plainly declared his inner thoughts for anyone watching to see. Tori laughed under her breath as Sam clearly gave up trying to talk to Might Guy and turned back to Rock Lee and TenTen. Tori grinned proudly as she saw Sam shoulders straighten boldly as she put forth her request. Rock Lee's entire skinny body leaped up with the energy of his positive fist pump. TenTen seemed to caution him, but her agreeing nod seemed to seal the promise that Samantha would get at least some of the young genins' time to learn the ways of the ninja.

Of course, their conversation seemed to attract the attention of the fourth member of Team Guy. The old sourpuss of a kid seemed to say something rude and derisive to Samantha. Victoria's eyes narrowed. Thirteen year old boys were literally the worst in some ways. But Sam-Sam seemed to hold her own. Her hands made fists on her hips and she leaned forward slightly: her arguing back pose. Neji folded his arms defensively. Rock Lee notably shifted his position: standing proudly and strongly next to Samantha. "Go Rocky-Boy," Tori murmured to herself. "Dang, I like that kid. Ooh!" Sam was pointing. Bad sign, that meant she was really passionate about whatever she was saying. Tori wished she was close enough to hear just what awesome rant Samantha was unleashing. Neji's scowl deepened and he stuck his nose up into the air in a stupidly-condescending way that made Victoria roll her eyes at him even from as far away as she was. She took a little vindictive comfort in the thought that as unhappy with the world as Neji professed to be, he likely was, in all actuality, that miserable. That didn't, however, meant it was cool for him to take it out on Sam!

Whatever Sam said worked - or at least the agreement of both Rock Lee and TenTen meant Neji knew he was outnumbered. He tossed his head and stomped away. Sam and Rock Lee exchanged victorious high-fives, and across the distance Tori and TenTen both laughed at the sight.

In that moment, Victoria's heart was warm and light: somehow she had the feeling that this was important. Maybe the reason Heaven had let them travel here was for exactly this: an undeniable, inexplicable chance for Samantha to work on her awesome but oft-neglected goals. Tori mentally committed herself in that moment to be the bestest, most-positive cheerleader she possibly could for her friend. Sam needed victory in her life. And Victoria was gonna make sure she got it! Even if it meant she had to drag herself down to the training grounds and limp through the exercises with her. They were gonna do it!

It was an interesting start, to say the least. Samantha had the privilege of showing off the small karate skills she'd already learned, and Rock Lee grew ecstatic at the sight. Of course, Sam laughed, cheeks pink with embarrassment, when she stated she'd never actually had the chance to spar before. This only spurred Rock Lee on, however, and he even got Tenten involved in their training session. Might Guy had abandoned the area, saying he had other business to attend to, so it was fine for his youthful students to help a young lady in need (Samantha was actually fairly certain that she and Victoria were older then him). Despite the haughty words of Neji Hyūga, Sam laughed elated at the moves she was learning from her new-found teacher. Particularly surprising since she had never placed Rock Lee in a high ranking spot of favorite characters in the Naruto universe. Tenten had been even less on the poll due to her lack of character arcs or progression. That they could see. Tenten was actually quite impressive. She'd had a mastery of weapons that Samantha couldn't believe for a girl so young. Tenten was what, thirteen? Fourteen? At that age, Samantha was too engrossed in the enigma that was the internet, having little thought but for the wonderment that it held. So now, after more than a year of missing out on her kenpo lessons, it felt good to be back at it. Though, a part of Sam, the more pessimistic side of her, worried about how long this elation would last. For reasons unknown to herself, Samantha had the honeymoon affect - or rather, that's how she imagined it to be like. It was always so exciting in the beginning, but that excitement and motivation fizzled out like the carbonation from a soda, and she no longer had any desire to continue. Not because she didn't have a passion for it, but, it was hard to see past the rose colored glasses. She waved to Victoria, smiling widely. If there was one thing that Samantha knew, it was that she could count on her best friend. Tori had a way of helping her see past the roses, and see the truth of the matter and what it could bring to her life for more than a few seconds of dilly-dallying. Tori was the kind of friend that seemed to know just what you needed, when you needed it. Tori was the kind of person that deserved her loyalty. Samantha failed, sometimes, to be the kind of friend Victoria deserved (Sam could be too passionate about her, well, passions, and Tori never complained when Samantha indulged herself to things such as playing anime music all day long, or shuffling off on an adventure in the middle of the night. Tori really was amazing). So, the least that Samantha did and could do was look out and support her best friend.

In any case, by the time they were done with their training session, Samantha plopped down next to Victoria, huffing and gasping, lips gulping down the water that Tenten had conveniently pulled from a containment seal. "That… was awesome." Sam sighed happily, head lying comfortably on the grass, resting her tired body.

"You did amazing, best friend," Victoria said, daintily patting Sam on the head. "I cheered for you very much. Thank you for not accidentally dying when Rock Lee kicked too close to your head."

"I'm pretty sure that's only because he saw I was too slow for him. That kid is fast! Holy fudge-monkeys!" Samantha thought back on the session. The anime did not do that kid any justice for his quick moves. How Gaara was able to even keep up with that kid, and defeat him, was beyond Sam. His jinchuuriki status notwithstanding. "So… now what?"

"Now, we make you the main character, my dear. So! What's the plan for training tomorrow?"

Relaxing under their tree, Sam and Tori continued to discuss Sam's new training plan and mutually wondered if they would ever spy Kakashi again, when he had suddenly appeared between one breath and the next. The mercurial ninja held up a picnic basket as though that was the entire explanation to justify his unexpected absence and then they had followed him for a similarly unexpected hike - he barely registered any of Samantha's complaining about her sore body from the day's training, as she would never have given it a go that day if they had been informed of their hike previously. When he didn't comment at all, Tori also tried to start up conversation a few times, but after Kakashi's lack of responses, Sam and Tori exchanged a look and fell silent. As they walked, the sun slipped the last of the way behind the western mountains.

The forest was surprisingly awake in the dusky darkness as the last of twilight faded to true night. As they had gotten further and further away from the lights of Konoha, their eyes had adjusted well to the brightening moonlight and the emerging stars far above the leafy canopy. Birds cried their groodnights and the far-from-sleepy squirrels chattered eagerly as they darted along branches. Cicadas hummed noisily. Amid the wild melody, it seemed an almost magical peace had descended with the nightfall.

"It's like a symphony," Victoria whispered to Samantha. "I don't think I ever saw a forest as a alive as this. It's amazing."

"It's the best part of traveling," Kakashi offered from a few paces ahead, his silver hair bouncing in the half-light. "Getting away from the city. The noise. Well," he corrected, "The human noise."

Samantha hummed her agreement, viewing the sky with great intent. "This is… this is just breathtaking." Samantha exclaimed softly, "The last time I saw a view like this, I was camping with Ivy and her family up in the mountains of Logan one summer. Even then, it isn't comparative to this. I can't believe how many stars there are! It's like… it's like looking into space itself. This is just amazing!" Samantha couldn't help but twirl to see more of the night sky.

"There's a clearing up ahead," Kakashi informed. "We'll stop there."

Tori smiled a little, not only for the promise of the stop (her feet were hurting, after all) but also because it seemed that whatever had been upsetting their self-imposed warden seemed to have finally cleared his mind. "It really is beautiful," Victoria agreed, craning her head back like Sam to take in the wild starlight above in the breaks between the lofty pines that shadowed over their pathway like ancient sentries.

Then the trees fell away and a large field of long grass rolled out before them, dipping and cresting over a pair of small hills. Without discussion being needed, the group trouped to the closer of these hills, each finding a place to sit on the soft grasses. The basket was set down and after a moment all three reclined fully back to soak in the full horizon of stars slowly appearing above them. A whole river of small stars cut across the sky from the north to the south east corner. It looked achingly familiar and Tori wondered if maybe it was the same Milky Way as home and somewhere among those bright points of light was their own sun shining on their families back home. Her breath caught a little at the thought. It had been almost a whole week now. She couldn't even imagine what her mother must be thinking. She blinked back the tears and tried to instead just focus on the beauty of the wild night sky. "It's so deep," she said softly. "I feel like I could just fall into it and never reach the bottom."

"Right?" Sam agreed, "What amazes me is that no matter which part of the sky we see, there's billions upon billions of galaxies. Who knows if there's an earth in each of them that holds people just like us there. I wouldn't doubt it." Samantha sighed, happily, "This is why I love the night. It's so… incredible." Like Victoria, Sam thought of her family, and wondered what they were up to at that moment. If they were worried about her. She missed them absolutely, but somehow, she knew that they'd see them again. It was like… when you know that the decision you made for your life is what you needed to do. Something about this situation they were in felt… needed. There was a purpose and God would watch over them while they did their part. Whatever may come. Sam reached over and grabbed a sandwich out of the picnic basket that Kakashi had brought. "So… what made you decide to take us out on an outing during the night? You're not going to, like, kill us and bury our bodies after giving us one last delicious meal, are you?" Though she tried to be serious, Samantha couldn't hold back the tiny smile off her lips.

"That's exactly it," Kakashi drawled, his voice dripping with sarcasm.

"I knew it," Victoria said from Sam's other side. "It was only a matter of time. Pass me a sandwich, Sam-Sam. Might as well enjoy our last moments."

Samantha snorted, handing Victoria another sandwich. "Well, if I'm going to die right now, then you must at least give me one last muse." She wiped her hands on her jeans, stood up, situated her hat on her head (Kakashi indulged in her desire to wear the hat, even if it wasn't particularly kosher in this village) stood with her back to the two, brought her hands to her lips, and shouted at the top of her lungs.

Victoria wasn't quite as surprised as she should have been by Sam's sudden shout, but she giggled at the way Kakashi bolted up, clearly not anticipating that reaction at all. "Girl, you're crazy!" she shouted mid-laugh to Sam. "And you're scaring Kakashi-San!"

He glared at both of them. "Not scared," he defended, once Sam stopped her shout. "Jounin don't get scared by things like that."

"Uh-huh," Samantha giggled as she plopped on the ground next to Tori, "You know that that's what they all say when they don't want the truth to be known, right?" Her tone gave the "I know you know I'm right" before she leaned against her hands "Man, that was satisfying!"

"You two do not understand the protocol of star-gazing," Kakashi lightly scolded. "You are supposed to lie down, look at the stars, and if you do talk it's to share stories or sing. It is not a time for guttural raging against the universe." The women's giggling interrupted his scolding and he gave a gusty sigh of defeat.

"Sorry, Kakashi-San," Victoria said between giggles. "We'll be better, I swear."

"I promise nothing," Samantha chimed in cheekily.

He gave them both a narrow-eyed glare. "It'd be easier to handle genin than you two."

"We'll see if you still feel the same way next week," Victoria quipped.

"Besides, have you never just gave a large, guttural shout to the world? Or intentionally broken glass? Thrown something? C'mon, it's not that crazy, ya know." Sam asked, genuinely curious.

He shifted his weight to tuck his arms behind his head and gazed up at the sky. "If I need to break something, I usually just find an enemy's arm," he pointed out drolly as Samantha blew out a breathy 'well'. "But I know what you mean, Samantha-Chan."

Victoria tilted her head to gaze sideways at the sky, still drinking in the starlight. "Sam always has a lot of energy in new places," she observed gently. "She's an adventurous soul at heart."

"You bet I am. It's so exciting!" Samantha stretched, sitting with her legs straight, arms behind her on the grass. "I've been on adventures before and each time… there's just something about travelling. Getting to see the world. Ya know?" And being here, at this point, Samantha felt antsy. She wasn't sure why, but her heart pounded slightly, feeling restless. It wasn't something she was unused to. She found that she frequently felt restless, unable to sit still. Yelling was a way to release pent up energy. As was breaking glass. The satisfying crunch as it hit the ground in billions of pieces. Yup. She'd definitely done something like that before. "You never know what adventure's will happen because you took that step. It's so exhilarating!"

"You've probably had lots of adventures, Kakashi-San," Victoria murmured, subconsciously willing Samantha to settle a little. Tori was still worried by the strange way Kakashi had been behaving ever since his bout that afternoon. She could tell something had upset the quiet ninja, but she really wasn't sure what or why he had dragged them both so far away from everything. "You said you like to share stories when you star-gaze. Do you want to tell us one of yours?" That's something Sam would love, right? Especially if it's outside of the canon.

Samantha kept her eyes up at the stars, keenly listening to anything that Kakashi may say. The great thing about stories was the fact that you could get to know character's and know what happens on each side of the event. Whether they be the main character or the antagonist. The hard part about stories was that you miss the day to day goings on, and can't know what they have gone through or felt every day. The stories they have heard, or the experiences they've been through. The reader can only know what the writer wants them to know. For this cause, Samantha was honestly curious to Kakashi's response. What sorts of stories did he have that they were unaware of? She kept a keen ear on his response, though chose not to say anything.

"A story for a story," he bartered. "Or a story for a song. One or the other from each of you," he challenged. After their quiet agreement to the terms he thought for a long moment. "One time. Long ago, when I was a very young jounin, my squad was assigned a transport mission. At that time, the Leaf Village was still at war with the Village Hidden in the Rain, so nearly every mission was considered B rank or higher. I was full of fire then. A genin in temperment, if not rank. So my squad leader picked this mission, I believe, just to teach me a lesson." His silver eye reflected the stars above, but there were dark shadows within: memories of companions lost and friends' deaths. "It was a very long mission, too long of a story for one night's telling, but there was one part that I'll never quite forget. Part of our mission was to protect these two old ladies who had to travel with the transport. They were terrible. The worst part of the mission. And slow. So slow. Well, we got to the third day of travel with them, and I was ready to kill them. Quite literally, it seemed the mission would be better served by their dead arrival to the destination than to be so slowed down by their walking pace."

"You really would have killed a pair of little, old ladies?" Victoria interrupted, grave concern and some shock in her voice.

"I was not a very nice child," Kakashi said just as gravely. "But Minato-Sensei had the patience I did not. He said no, and I endured. Well on the morning of the fourth day, one of the grannies, she hurt herself. So now, not only did we have to travel at a snail's pace, but at a broken snail's pace."

Samantha was sure that the story wasn't meant to be funny, but Kakashi's description of the entire event was hilarious. She couldn't help but snort. "You were quite the dramatic child, weren't you?"

"Yes," he agreed easily. "But it was a time of war and every minute waiting for Granny Two to limp over the mountains was another minute vulnerable to enemy attack. So finally, I had had enough. I declared that there was no way we were going to wait for her to limp up the hills. Either she allow one of us to carry her or we were leaving her behind."

"I bet she didn't like that," Tori offered. "Even grannies have their pride."

"Even grannies have their pride," Kakashi agreed. "As she was quick to inform me. She gave me quite the telling-off. Even my ears were blistered. And Granny One, too. She was also ready to defend her friend. 'The real heroes are the ones that never give up, no matter how hard it gets!' she said, 'No matter how much they have to endure or how much harder they have to work than anybody else. They don't give up and they don't give in.'"

Sam's eyes sparkled at the story of the two grannies. They were pretty smart to box the boy's ears. It sure sounded like he deserved it. The phrase that Kakashi just stated rang some familiar bells, itching her memory, but being so engrossed in the story, Samantha quickly tossed the vague thought aside. "They sound smart." She stated her earlier thought, "Sounds like you needed a time out or something."

"Sam!" Tori scolded.

"What?" Sam asked, innocently.

"Eh, she's probably right.."

"Hah!" Sam announced her triumph to Victoria.

"In the end, I won, and Sensei made the Grannies let us carry them for awhile, but it did stick with me. Even Grannies have their pride, and its enough to get your squad killed if you aren't careful." His last words were rather dark and for a moment Victoria was reminded that the person lying just on the other side of Sam was, literally, a murderer. Yes, he had killed people in war and in self-defense, but.. There was blood on his hands. Unconsciously, she reached over and grabbed the edge of Sam's sleeve to keep her close. Kakashi turned his face towards the two of them, and gave his trademark eye-crinkling smile, but it didn't feel quite genuine. "So. Which of you is going to go next?"

Samantha, feeling Victoria's discomfort, chimed in, "Me!" Patting Tori's hand in comfort, Sam contemplated on the best story to give. "Hmmm… well. There once was a girl, who dreamed of romance. From the time she realized she would be a mom one day, it was all the girl could think about. Every time her family moved to a different home, it's what she dreamed of. That one day, a dashing prince would come and sweep her off her feet. However, much to her disappointment, that day never did arrive. Instead, she learned something about life. Family was far more important that a spouse. As long as she had her family, she would be fine. Though it never got rid of the longing of wishing to be with someone. She did find solace in stories. Sometimes, she even imagined they'd be real, because what an awesome adventure would lay ahead of her if that was true." Samantha lay back, resting her head on her hands. "Then one day, she found herself thrust into one of those realities. Something she had long since believed to be fantasy." Samantha was no good at storytelling. She loved to read, but her mind always went blank when it came to 'on the spot' moments. "It was a dream come true." She finally finished.

"What did she find in the new reality?" Victoria asked, prompting Samantha forward in her tale. She could tell, of course, the reality of Sam behind the nameless heroine, but Kakashi would have no reason to see that and the story had to have some sort of ending. "Was there a prince there? Someone unbelievably hot?"

Samantha gave a quick laugh, "Oh yes. One of the hottest around. Though she never did find her one true love. She did find a best friend in the extremely hot prince. One of many, in fact. The girl wasn't lucky in the way of love, but she had a plethora of best friends. Which, because of the goals the girl had set for herself, ended up filling the tightness that the loss of a dashing prince had been."

"Friends can be a family," Kakashi agreed. "The girl was lucky. Although, I prefer the stories that do end with love, or at least someone getting naked."

"Somehow that doesn't surprise me," Samantha laughed a breathy laugh. "I agree, though. Love at the end of the story is the best kind. I guess I just contradicted myself with the story I just told, eh? Hah. Oh geez." Samantha could tell she was digging herself into a hole and therefore decided to quit while she was ahead.

Tori giggled, blushing a little at the whole conversation. "Well, not every story ends perfectly," she reminded Sam. "That's totally okay. Maybe it's not the end of that character's story yet. It could still surprise you."

"Fair enough," Samantha agreed. "Who knows? There could definitely be a sequel! I've not read it yet, though."

"You'll have to let me know how it ends," Kakashi told her and silence fell much more comfortably between them all for a time. "Tori-Chan...it's your turn," the copycat ninja drawled.

"Are you sure?" the tall girl hedged nervously. "I think Sam probably had more to add, right?"

"Pff, I think Kakashi's right! It's definitely your turn." Samantha elbowed her friend, "No way you're getting out of our storytelling."

"Rude," Tori accused under her breath. "Um...I can't really think of anything," she admitted, totally blanking out.

"A story or a song," Kakashi reminded from Sam's other side. "It doesn't have to be long."

"Huh. Okay.." Nervously, she licked her lips, debating for awhile but then she softly began to sing an old song she sometimes used as a lullaby for her niece. "I'll sing it one last time for you," she started softly, "But then I really have to go. You've been the only thing that's right..in all I've done." It wasn't perfect, Tori knew she had an okay, but far from awesome voice, and she probably skipped a verse or two in the middle, but somehow, it felt like home. And there in the darkness and the stars, it felt right to have that little bit of home again. Letting the last note die away, she sighed softly and leaned her head against Sam's shoulder.

"Wow," Samantha commented, "I haven't heard that song in such a long time." She stared at the sky in thought. "That was… Snow Patrol? Right?" She rarely listened to the band, and could really only sing one of the songs herself. But it was a good choice! Suddenly, through the thick of their musings of the universe and familiarity of home, a rustling came from the bushes, and before any of them could sit up and turn around, an orange blur appeared by their heads, crashing loudly past and disappearing as quick as he came. Samantha shot up, to look behind her, "What in the world?" She glanced at Kakashi to gauge his thoughts, "Was that… Naruto?" She briefly gave a look at Tori throughout her question.

The silver-haired jounin was crouched and poised, his gaze turned in the direction the blur had gone. "Stay here," he instructed and then he disappeared in a blur of dark blue.

Victoria slowly got to her feet as well. She gathered their things, stuffing it all back into the basket. "If that was Naruto," she said, trying to stay calm, "That's bad, right? Didn't you say the other day that the one douchebag guy was going to chase him and try to kill him for some sort of scroll? If he comes this same way, we're right in his path."

Samantha hesitated, "Uh, well. Yes… but Iruka was already fighting him. Had him tricked, actually. But… you're right. If they come through here… he could take us as hostages… that does not sound fun. We should leave."

Tori nodded determinedly and pointed towards the east, perpendicular to the path the orange Naruto-blur had traveled. They both began to quickly make their way down the hill, the long grasses shushing around them. Tori's heart was pounding quickly, but she felt remarkably calm. Distantly there was a harsh sound like something huge crashing into a pine tree. Without it needing to be said, they both started to run: the tree line being the best defense they could hope for from the dangerous shinobi battling somewhere behind them. Once they broke the treeline, Tori pointed to the south, back the way that Naruto had fled from. It made sense to go to where the ninja used to be as a way to avoid being where they might suddenly be. Jogging now - they really needed to get in better shape - they darted between trees and over logs until they both couldn't go any further. "Let's - stop - there," Victoria gasped, pointing to a small wooden shack underneath three large oak trees up ahead. "I can't..go any more.."

Huffing, Samantha nodded, "I'm fine - with that," She made her legs move forward, until both she and Tori were in front of the wooden shack. Samantha cautiously opened the door, wincing when it creaked open, staring blankly into the cob-webby area. "Uh, how about let's not go in there," She volunteered to Victoria, opting to sit on the grass instead to catch her breath.

"What..ever.." Tori panted, flopping down onto a nearby rock. "I just..didn't want to..stay there," she said. Coughing harshly, she pressed a hand to her chest as though it could slow down her heart rate and regain her breath. "No point...In messing up..the timeline..more than it has been." She coughed hard again, bending over with the force of it. As she did, her hand landed on something smooth and papery. Blinking, she picked it up. "Found..something." She waved the piece of parchment to Sam and then handed it over. "Does it look important.. To you?"

Samantha had closed her eyes, "I…" She panted, "I have no idea," She weakly grabbed the parchment, looking at the writings. "There's...Japanese writing," Coughing into her arm, Samantha inspected the parchment closer, her brow furrowing. "I have…no idea what it says," She confessed, "I'm still learning Japanese." She rested a little longer, finally feeling like she wasn't wheezing and gulping in air. Sam laid the parchment piece on her stomach, glancing at the shed, before her eyes narrowed. "That place… looks familiar." She told Tori.

Tori gave a sad laugh between her labored breathing. "Don't tell me..something awful is about to happen here..and we walked right into it."

"Uh, well, no? Crap, I don't remember! This place… Naruto running… Kakashi leaving…" Samantha sat up, viewing her surroundings. "I… I think this is… oh my gosh! Tori!" Sam whipped towards her friend, "Today's the first day of the anime!"

"But..we knew that," Tori reminded her breathlessly. "All the kids at the match, they had their headbands. That means they graduated. And..you said yesterday that we had to keep an eye out for the creeper from the restaurant cuz he tries to kill Naruto the night of graduation, right? So..that's where we are, right? What happens when he tries to chase him? Like, obviously Naruto ends up okay, cuz he's in the rest of the show, but what else happens?"

Samantha blinked, staring at the shed, "Well… Iruka found Naruto just before the douchebag Mizuki did, took a massive shuriken for Naruto, got Naruto to escape - which must've been what we had been witnessing when he ran past - Iruka dupes Mizuki, and Naruto beats the man to a pulp using his multi-shadow clone jutsu. This is where Naruto becomes a genin! I can't believe it! I had just… completely forgotten that that's what happened tonight! Then," Samantha looked at the parchment piece in her hand, "This must be a part of the forbidden scroll…"

Tori frowned. "Like, full of ninja secrets?" she asked worriedly. "We should probably keep it safe then." The sound of running footsteps reached their ears about half a second before a lean silver-topped form skidded to a stop in front of them.

Kakashi glared at them both. "I told you to stay there," he growled.

Samantha gulped, staring like a deer caught in the headlights, "That's true. You did."

"We heard someone coming," Victoria hastily added. His gaze shot between them and Victoria felt uncomfortably like she was about to be yelled at by the principal. "We didn't want to get in the middle of whatever was going on. Retreat sounded like the safest option."

"Really, it was the better option," Samantha agreed, backing Tori up.

"You don't disobey the squad leader," he growled out. "Unless lives are in danger." Clearly full of anxious energy beyond the rage he was crackling with, the copycat ninja began to spin a razor-sharp kunai between his fingers. He stalked back and forth in front of them, his gaze shooting restlessly to the forest around them.

For the first since Samantha and Tori had arrived in Konoha, Sam felt real irritation towards the jounin, "Our lives were in danger. Safety is a must in my book." She clenched her teeth, her eyes blazing, before Samantha sighed, "Sorry. I know we must've worried you…"

"I..can't protect you if I don't know where you are." The words tore out like he was reluctant to say them at all.

Samantha recognized the agony in the words and bit her lip, "I'm sorry," she said, earnestly.

Tori got to her feet, her hands stretched out in a placating way. "Kakashi-San," she said gently, "We just tried to do what was best. It was my decision. We didn't want to be a vulnerability for you if something bad happened. And..it was a good thing we did move. Sam, show him what we found."

"Oh, right!"

Samantha held out the hand with the parchment, intending to give it to Kakashi, when, right before the jounin reached for the piece, a male voice called out, "No! Don't give it to him!" Samantha paused, baffled, pulling back her hand briefly, looking confusedly in Tori's direction. Her friend seemed to be just as puzzled.

Kakashi reached out to take the scrap of paper from her, when both women unexpectedly stepped back, Sam gripping the parchment tighter, for no reason they could understand. Again, a voice - a teen boy's voice, Tori could now tell - repeated the instruction. "Don't let Kakashi-sama have that scroll!"

Without her recognizing what she was doing, Victoria grabbed the scrap from Sam's fingers and hid it behind her back. "I..I don't know why, but I don't want to give this to you," she explained helplessly.

The futility of her attempt was obvious when just seconds later Victoria's fingers were grasping nothing and the jounin was halfway across the small clearing, examining the scrap of parchment for himself. "No!" Tori cried.

"Wait! Come back!" Samantha, for reasons unknown to her, felt an inexplicable panic at the sight of Kakashi walking away with the parchment. Whatever that voice was, whatever it did to cause her to lose the ability to function for even that split second was enough to recognize something was wrong. That voice had called Kakashi "sama". A title the man didn't get for years later. It left her with more questions than answers and the thought was exhausting. "We have to go after him," Samantha frantically replied to Tori, starting forward to follow after the man.

They both hurried forward and the former Anbu responded by leaping up into the sturdy branches of the nearest oak. Neither Sam nor Tori had any hope of following him up there. He was reading the scroll as intently as though it were one of his pervy-novels. "You're not supposed to have that!" Victoria cried after him, not knowing why she felt so desperately or hopelessly certain of that fact, but just the thought of it was making her feel about to cry. "Destroy it! Throw it away! Do something!"

"Please! Just trust us!" Samantha pleaded with him. They were now staring up at Kakashi's crouched form in the very high trees. Surely what a gift it would be if they could climb trees too. How unopportunistic! Sam lamented in her lack of skill, all the while wondering why she felt such a need to pry that blasted parchment from his grip.

Victoria dug her hands into her hair, pulling at the strands and growling slightly to herself. "It's bad!" she called up. "Whatever it is in there, you're not supposed to have it! Please, Kakashi-San!"

He finally looked down at them and then tucked the scrap away beneath the cover his tactical vest. He frowned slightly at the both of them. Kakashi seemed about to say something but then shook his head slightly. "I have to go let the Hokage know the Forbidden Scroll is not protected. You stay here or I cannot promise to protect you from the consequences." Then he was bounding away in the moonlight, gone from their sight in mere seconds.

"No!" Samantha ineffectively held out her hand in protest, as if to make after Kakashi. But the jounin was long gone, leaving them to their own devices. Blowing out a flustered breath, Sam looked towards Tori, "Well… I guess… we wait here?"

Tori sighed, looking wistfully after the departed male. "I guess we have to," she agreed. "But heavens, I wish he hadn't read that.." Turning back to Sam, her eyes widened and she pointed at Sam's left pocket. "Sam, you're glowing.."

"What're you-?" Samantha began as she looked down at her pocket, her eyes widening at the sight, "Holy fudge!" She quickly whipped her hand in her pocket and pulled out the marble that was, for the second time since they had found the item, glowing that piercing white. Samantha held it away from her face for a second, before looking once again at the marble. "What do you think this means?" She questioned Tori, her heart beating wildly. The glowing marble was laying flat on her open palm.

"Maybe it means we can go home now?" Victoria asked. She felt hesitant though. Clearly something was still undone in all this. "Or..I dunno, maybe it senses the presence of orcs?" Her weird humor manifested to conceal the sense of anxiety the glowing marble caused. "It knew we needed a flashlight?"

Samantha let out a laugh in her anxiousness, "Sadly, I doubt this is like Frodo's sword: Sting." She replied, "But maybe you're right. Maybe we'll get to go home, now? It's how we got here, initially."

Tori took a slow step closer, eyeing the marble like it might suddenly jump from Sam's hand and whack her in the forehead. "Or we'll get dragged away somewhere worse...Akame Ga Kill comes to mind as a place I do not want to go.."

"Ugh! Why would even bring that up! Such an awful ending! Ugh!" Despite her worry, Samantha's nose crinkled with disgust. "But that place would be better than Tokyo Ghoul. Oh heavens, please don't let us go to that place! Wait, why are we even contemplating going to another place? What if it's just glowing just to glow?" She tried for placation's sake.

"Well, is it sticking to your hand yet?" Victoria asked worriedly. Sam gave her palm a little wave and the marble innocently rolled about. "Then I say we just get rid of it!" Victoria declared, and in a move of panic-driven stupidity, she grabbed the marble and flung it as hard as she could into the forest. Like a confused dog, she peered into the darkness to see where it went only to realize the glow had never left her hand. "Ack!" Victoria shook her hand up and down as hard as she could trying to dislodge the evil, magic ball. "Sam!" she cried pathetically, "I made a dumb!"

"I think you cursed us." Samantha stated, half amused, half in horror. She simply stared at the marble, before realizing that she could be stuck here and quickly grabbed onto the marble herself, having the same effect. Her hand was officially stuck. "At least, wherever we go, we're not alone!"

"Awwhh.." Tori cooed, but then the burst of glittery lights started and she remembered what was at stake here. "Sam! Kakashi won't know! He told us not to move. He won't understand!"

At Tori's realization, Samantha glanced around the forest worriedly. "I don't think we can stop this now, Tor." Sam said with a sad smile. "Maybe we should shout out to him?" After all, for some reason, their vanishing was taking quite a long time this time.

The marble started to pulse beneath their fingers and the light grew brighter and brighter. Squinting her eyes, Tori turned away and shouted as loud as she could. "Kakashi-San! We're sorry!" She dimly heard Sam shouting with her, but then the light was overwhelming and all that was left was total darkness and the faint whisper of starlight.

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Special Bonus! Behind the Scenes # 1

RoyalVicTorie: (after a full 37 hours waiting for a reply. How tragic, right?). You don't have to go to work yet. You should get Kakashi's Tragic Backstory written so I can reply to it.

MangaGeek3: I'm gonna do it.

RoyalVicTorie: I mean, you could just kinda summarize the conversation. What points are you going to hit?

**Cue 20 minute long discussion of Kakashi's Tragic Backstory**

MangaGeek3: I'm not gonna tell you any more than that. You're not supposed to know until later.

RoyalVicTorie: Fine..but now that you told me, I can just write it for you! Problem solved.

MangaGeek3: Um, no! It's my words. You can't write my words!

RoyalVicTorie: (sensing she might have to wait another whole day) But I know how you talk, and you just told me what you'd say. I could totally write as you.

MangaGeek3: (laughing) No! That's not right! It's my words. You can't write it.

RoyalVicTorie: (like a punk gangster) I've done it before, and I'LL DO IT AGAIN!

...and clearly the threat worked, cuz MangaGeek3 wrote her side before work. :P

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A/N: What's up peeps! Our fellow readers! MangaGeek3 here. We have finally gotten out our next chapter! But, I mean... c'mon... it's quite long, no? xD Anyways... soooo much feels in this chapter eh? Thank you so much to our fellow reader's and reviewers! I hope you look forward to what's to come in the next chapter! (I mean... why wouldn't you? This was left on a cliff-hanger. The worst! xD ) So many things are beginning to happen and the plot is beginning to move forward. Yay! Anyways... pleeeeeeeease Read and Review! We love you all!

RoyalVicTorie says: Hi everyone! Thanks so much for the read! We had a ridiculously funtime with the chapter - wasn't that fight great? Thank you muchly for your patience in between updates. And finally, tell us what you guys think! Who's the real main character out of these guys: Sam or Tori? Settle the debate for us once and for all! 3