Chapter 61: Holiday Hob Nob
AUTHOR'S NOTE: I wrotre this chap shortly aqfter the holidays, but forgot my password so I couldn't post til now! It is sort of a New Year story but with Santa and If you don't like it I don't care, okay?!
I kind of want to get the catchphrases my characters use in the story on tea shits, but ONLY if you guys will buy them! (Making some money ;) ) I'll get one that has a Vade head but not so much it'll cause copyright and capshun with "These Are Shit" which is what Vade says a lot, and onme tat says "I AM CHOAS." When ur friends ask where it's from you can say "Duh! The War in our Stars! Where've you been, Mars?" Aand maybe that can be on a shirt too if you want?
I will reply to some of the revewis: I am SORRY that I don't spell the best all the time, okay! But I have ADHD! And I try to spell but get excited sometimes. And thank you for all the reviews, especi from my fan club on Discords. Y'all are good and right in my eyes. And thank you even to the critical ppl because it frustrates me but critiques help us all write better and I'll try to spell better like u said just please me patent all you sexy ass people. ;)
Twas the night before new years and all through the house not a creature was stirring, not even DARTH VADER.
The baks were hung on his desk with care, in hopes that OIL MONEY soon would be there.
The Skywalker children were nesstled all snug in there bed while visions of Sussasna's sweet ASS danced in BOTH there heads.
And robert in his helmet and Kanh in his hat had just finished having gay sex and were taking a nap.
When out in the hall there arose such a clatter vade ran out with his lightsbaer to see what was the matter.
He ran to the windows, his lightasber flashed. He threw open the metal door and advaced with a slaaaash!
The moon on the surface of the tatoene sand gave a look to the sand that was very much grand.
When what to his wondering eyes should apeare, but a little red man and eight robotic reindeer?
With a little old driver so FAT and so slick. He knew in a moment it must be Santa Claus.
More rappid than hyperdrive his robotic reindeer came, and he whistled for them and screamed out there name. "NOW DASHER NOW DANCER NOW PRAMSER AND VIXION ON COMMET ON CUPID ON DONNER AND BLITZEN! TO THE TOP OF THE BUILDING, WHERE THERE ARE NO SHIELDS! DASH AWAY REINDEER AND DO NOT YIELD."
As dry leaves that before the hurricane fly, when they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky, so up to the housetop the coursers they flew, with a sleigh full of toys, and Saint Santa Claus too!
And then on the ceiling he heard the robottic reindeer land. High up above the sand.
As Vade turned his head slowly, Santa Clasu was suddently behind him! (I should have sensed that with the force!?)
He was dressed on in fur from a bantha he skinned. He looked at vade and gaily grinned (not homosexual. Happy)
He had a pipe held in his teeth and he smoked it while he smiled gaily at vade.
He had a FAT face and he was FAT, and he shook when he laughed like a bowl full of jello.
He was very gay and jolly, a jolly gay elf, and Vade laughed through his vet, depsite himself. A wink of his eyes and a twist of his head soon gave vade to know he was not here to steal oil money.
He sprang to his sled, to his team gave a whistle and Vade fainted from confusion in the middle of the hall.
But he heard him excalim as he drove out of site "Happy New Years Vade! Santa Claus is REAL!"
The next day, all of the employees of AmericVade found a strange package in the mailbox.
COAL.
(Arthur's Note: This is cannon. Santa Cluase exists in this universe. The one part that isn't cannon is Robert and Kahn having sex. They are both gay but don't like each other that way)
Happy Holidays, Hombre ;)