Chapter 69 (I bet you are expeting me to make a sixteen sex joke but I won't. This is a christian star wars fan fiction okay guys? Okay guys.)
While they were all on board the ship, Luke decided he wanted coffe.
"Get some from the coffee maker in the kicteh." said Sussana, smaking her lips and hips.
"No, said Luke, becoming emotional. If I don't get free trade coffee I'll think about all the poor kids in african having to pick coffee leaves themslves without being paid."
So the ship dropped luke off on a planet with a free trade coffee shop, like a butt that drops of a shit.
He got his coffee at the shop, the coffee shop worker was a beautiful transgender person and luke said "you look fucking sexy you motha" because its okay to do that to make people feel good.
But then someone sat down across from him, it looked like a crab with skulls all over its shell and the skulls where its faces. There was an evil smell about it. Something dark.
Luke recognized it immeditaly as his old nemsis ZARGOX, the Evil One that used to chill in Sussana's ship and eat people's legs.
"What are you doing in a free trade coffee shop, ZARGOX?" assd luke.
"The coffee tastes better" he scoffed "and there are a lot of proud people here who think they are better than everyone else. Cant you just taste the PRIDE."
Luke didn't want to talk to the creb, but he knew th e Bible wanted him to be polite to his neighbor, and maybe Zarg was his neighbor, like ythe good semariaon.
"How have you been?" Luke asked.
"I've been trying to show people THE TRUTH" he said, his breath smelled like sulfur.
"Hey, me too!" Luke struck a pose.
"I'm trying to prove that God doesn't exist." ZARGOX smiled, luke frowend.
"But he does."
"If God excists, how can there be starving children in africa."
"Well . . ."
"If God exists, how come Han is dead."
There was a long silence, Luke held back tears, "Heaven gained a new angel that day."
"That is nonsesne! Prove that God exists."
Then Luke told him that Obtological Argument for the existance of god by Anselm. He memorized it while he was training with yoda.
"Therefore, if that, than which nothing greater can be conceived, exists in the understanding alone, the very being, than which nothing greater can be conceived, is one, than which a greater can be conceived. But obviously this is impossible. Hence, there is doubt that there exists a being, than which nothing greater can be conceived, and it exists both in the understanding and in reality. . . . God cannot be conceived not to exist. —God is that, than which nothing greater can be conceived. —That which can be conceived not to exist is not God. AND it assuredly exists so truly, that it cannot be conceived not to exist. For, it is possible to conceive of a being which cannot be conceived not to exist; and this is greater than one which can be conceived not to exist. Hence, if that, than which nothing greater can be conceived, can be conceived not to exist, it is not that, than which nothing greater can be conceived. But this is an irreconcilable contradiction. There is, then, so truly a being than which nothing greater can be conceived to exist, that it cannot even be conceived not to exist;. and this being you are, O Lord, our God. So truly, therefore, do you exist, O Lord, my God, that you can not be conceived not to exist; and rightly. For, if a mind could conceive of a being better than you, the creature would rise above the Creator; and this is most absurd. And, indeed, whatever else there is, except you alone, can be conceived not to exist. To you alone, therefore, it belongs to exist more truly than all other beings, and hence in a higher degree than all others. For, whatever else exists does not exist so truly, and hence in a less degree it belongs to it to exist. Why, then, has the fool said in his heart, there is no God (Psalms xiv. 1), since it is so evident, to a rational mind, that you do exist in the highest degree of all? Why, except that he is dull and a fool? . . . How the fool has said in his heart what cannot be conceived. —A thing may be conceived in two ways: (1) when the word signifying it is conceived; (2) when the thing itself is understood. As far as the word goes, God can be conceived not to exist; in reality he cannot. 4 Reading For Philosophical Inquiry: A Brief Introduction "The Ontological Argument" by St. Anselm BUT how has the fool said in his heart what he could not conceive; or how is it that he could not conceive what he said in his heart? since it is the same to say in the heart, and to conceive. But, if really, nay, since really, he both conceived, because he said in his heart; and did not say in his heart, because he could not conceive; there is more than one way in which a thing is said in the heart or conceived. For, in one sense, an object is conceived, when the word signifying it is conceived; and in another, when the very entity, which the object is, is understood. In the former sense, then, God can be conceived not to exist; but in the latter, not at all. For no one who understands what fire and water are can conceive fire to be water, in accordance with the nature of the facts themselves, although this is possible according to the words. So, then, no one who understands what God is can conceive that God does not exist; although he says these words in his heart, either without any or with some foreign, signification. For, God is that than which a greater cannot be conceived. And he who thoroughly understands this, assuredly understands that this being so truly exists, that not even in concept can it be non-existent. Therefore, he who understands that God so exists, cannot conceive that he does not exist. I thank you, gracious Lord, I thank you; because what I formerly believed by your bounty, I now so understand by your illumination, that if I were unwilling to believe that you do exist, I should not be able not to understand this to be true."
By the time he had finished speaking, ZARGOX had left.