A/N: I'm venturing into a new fandom because I was inspired by a pivotal scene from Season 2 as well as a prompt that I found while scrolling aimlessly through facebook after a particularly rough "break-up" that I experienced. When I started writing this, I wasn't sure that I was actually going to post it, but I feel like writing it and sharing this has allowed me to feel a sense of relief after everything that has gone on.

I don't know if I'll continue writing in this fandom, but I know that I'm excited for season 3 to come out!

Let me know what you think!

Love always,
~starr

It's not the breakup that hurts the most. It's the post-trauma that follows it. It's waking up and checking your phone for messages that aren't there. It's like starting your life over again, and you have no idea where to begin.

And that's the scary truth about knowingly putting yourself out there to start a relationship, Love. I'm always looking at my phone, looking at your phone. Looking at your apartment through my telescope to see the next person coming to join you in your bed as you attempt to forget me.

You want to forget the way that my body felt against yours. The way my kiss made you tremble. The shiver that would run down your spine as my lips trailed down your neck and along your collarbone. You'll never be able to forget the way I made you feel, Love. All you'll be able to do is mask the pain you feel when I'm not by your side.

You'll learn soon enough, Love. You'll discover that no matter how hard you try to convince yourself that I was wrong for you, that my lies and secrets were too much for you. You'll learn that I only told you those lies to protect you. I didn't want to put you in danger.

I don't want my past to destroy our future. That's why I didn't tell you about Beck. And especially why I didn't tell you about Candace. Talking about them would destroy our future. I just need you to forgive me for not telling you about my life in New York. It's not who I am anymore. You know exactly who I am, Love.

You claim that you have no idea who I am or what to call me, but that isn't true. You know exactly what you want to call me. You know that deep down I'm still the man that you fell in love with. There just happens to be more to that man than you initially expected. If knowing about my life in New York will bring you back into my life here in Los Angeles, then I will tell you anything you want to know, Love. All you have to do is ask.

I meant it when I told you to call me whatever you want. I'll be there to answer that call as long as it's coming from you. I just want to hear your voice. I need to hear your voice, Love. The more hidden you keep yourself from me, the more I find myself wanting you. Holding you. Touching you. Kissing you. Feeling your body beneath mine I want to hear my name fall from your lips as I bring you to ecstasy.

I don't want to start over, Love. I don't want this to be the end of us. This is just a hiccup in the long road that remains for us, a barrier that we need to find a way around. We will find a way to move past this and be happy together.

After all, Love, we are both damaged, and damaged people always find one another.