Around mid-morning, Snake shows up to drag a very grumpy Kakashi out of his room. After yesterday's debacle, Kara had appeared muttering about treaties with Iwa and stubborn old goats, making agitated gestures at Kagami all the while. Kagami had run off immediately, but not before promising to drop by to watch Kakashi's spars.
"Your hair is sticking in all the wrong directions," the Snake sniggers, reaching out to poke the spikes of Hatake silver sticking out unevenly to the left. The hair behind Kakashi's head, however, is pressed too flat from a night's sleep.
"Growing it out is the only solution," Sakumo says serenely, ignoring Rin's skeptical look.
Kakashi swats Snake's hand away. "It's just like that," he replies irritably. Nevertheless, he charges a weak lightning style along his gloved hands and combs his fingers through his hair. There's a dangerous crackling sound.
Rin bursts out giggling at the misuse of jutsu. "It's worse!" Snake exclaims, dumbfounded.
"It's sticking out evenly, now," Kakashi retorts smugly, sliding his ANBU mask over his face.
The ANBU training grounds stretch beneath the outdoor training grounds numbered 10 to 15. Corridors branching out from the lowest floor of the ANBU building lead in the direction of the respective training rooms. Snake chooses the one going to Training Ground 7 and the narrow, dim passages seem to press down on them all the way. Sakumo can't help but heave a relieved exhale when they finally pull open the deceptively plain door marked "TG7"... only to have his breath catch in surprise.
There are at least forty ANBU perched on the four vertical walls, in all sorts of masks, both in uniform and out. The sound of chatter only increases when their waiting audience realises Kakashi is here. Snake peers down at the frozen teen and Sakumo gets a distinct impression that she is smirking behind her mask.
"W-what's this?" Rin stutters, peeking over Kakashi's shoulder.
"You really are quite the celebrity, Hound-kun," Snake murmurs, still holding the door open solicitously. "They're mostly just here to watch and do some reconnaissance, so don't you worry."
Kakashi finally finds his voice. "You really don't to things by halves, Snake-san," he says stiffly.
"I strive to please."
"Oi, I haven't got all day!" someone shouts, fed up with Snake and Kakashi hovering by the door. "Chickening out, Hound?"
Snake makes a hissing laugh and shoves Kakashi forward, earning herself a glare. She slams the door and immediately the walls light up with seals – chakra dampening and absorbing seals, structural reinforcement seals and silencing seals.
Snake struts up to the centre of the room while Kakashi drags his feet, taking in his audience as he casts his gaze about. "Welcome, one and all!" she says theatrically, clapping her hands to quieten the assembled ANBU. "I present to you – Hound!"
She bows. There's a collective sigh that feels like a gust of wind breezing through the room. A loud boo echoes off the walls.
Sakumo glances at Rin and sees the same bemused look reflected on her face. "It's like a show," she says lowly. "ANBU are so weird." The last word is dragged out slowly.
"What do you say to ten rounds of ten minutes, with five minute breaks in between?" Seemingly oblivious to her audience's poor receptiveness to her antics, Snake turns to Kakashi with an arm thrown out.
"Fine," Kakashi grunts, crossing his arms. His shoulders are tight with uneasiness.
"Wonderful!" she exclaims. "Now as the organiser I have first dibs—"
"What the hell Snake!" There's an outburst of protest but Snake hollers over them all, showing off an impressive lung capacity.
"—the other nine places, starting with the first fight, starts auctioning… now!" The grumbling subsides in favour of the calling of bids and soon barely restrained chaos erupts.
Kakashi grabs Snake hard by the shoulder and turns her around, his eyes flashing behind his mask. "I didn't agree to this," he hisses sharply. "I'm not some kind animal in a fighting pit you can auction!"
Snake just blinks innocently at him. "You were going to fight anyway." When Kakashi doesn't relent, she shrugs. "How about 40% commission?"
"500 ryo!" someone shouts and Kakashi stills, his hand sliding away to drop by his side. His two ghosts watch in trepidation, practically able to hear the cogs in his brain turning.
"75% in my favour."
Snake scoffs, her knuckles coming to rest on her hips. "You're kidding. Do you know how much time I spent convincing almost every free ANBU to attend? We split half-half."
The teen crosses his arms. "And I'm the one who's going to get all sweaty and bruised." He holds up his thumb and index finger. "70% or I'm leaving."
A lithe woman lands silently besides them, her aquamarine streaked mask flashing in the bleached lighting. "820 ryo, Snake-senpai." She straightens from her crouch and cocks her head at Kakashi. "Pleasure to meet you, Hound."
Kakashi gives her a sharp nod. "Pleasure to meet you as well…"
"Mantis."
The silver-haired teen inclines his head. "Mantis." He whips around to glare at Snake. "Well?"
"Maa— you drive a hard bargain Hound-kun." Snake sighs but it's exaggerated, belying the pleased slump of her shoulders. "70% it is." She turns to the crowd again, throwing her hands up. "Let's begin!"
Sakumo lets out a small "huh" of disbelief as the assembled ANBU start cheering. He'd always thought that ANBU were the stoic, silent type.
They're just repressed madmen in truth.
A/N: ANBU is a zoo. They're willing to pay to fight Kakashi because he'll soon be busy with missions and the like. Not everyone who wants to fight him will be able to catch him at the right time + convince him to agree. Since fighting ability is very important in ANBU, it's also a good chance to establish pecking order publicly.