Sorry it took so long for me to update. The previous chapter is done. It's my longest chapter so far with 2300 words. I figured I would end it before it got too long.

Tobias POV

It's been a few days since I went to visit Marcus. Thankfully I haven't gotten a call from Mr. Duncan or Dr. Harris, but I know it could happen at any time. As difficult as my childhood was, I do not wish for Marcus to die. Tris and Amar keep telling me that because I think that way it means that I'm not like him, but deep down I still have the fear that I will one day turn into my father.

I feel relieved that I've passed one hurdle with Marcus but now I'm faced with another: Evelyn. To this day I don't know which was worse: Marcus beating me or Evelyn abandoning me. While sons usually look up to their fathers and strive to be the same, mothers provide most of the nurturing and love. Marcus always wanted Evelyn at home taking care of me and things in the house while he worked and since I was an only child all Evelyn's attention was on me. She was there for me when I was sick or hurt and took me everywhere with her. I remember she used to say that I was her pride and joy and that she'd always be there for me no matter what. Guess she forgot. After all these years the only piece of her I have is a glass blue sculpture that I found in my room one day with a note in her handwriting that simply read For Tobias. It was really the only thing I kept of my possessions when the house was emptied and sold. Thankfully Marcus never found it.

So as I sit staring at the sculpture in my hand I think about what could have been and why I am still angry at Evelyn for leaving.

"What's that?" Tris asks me as she comes to sit beside me on the couch as I look between the sculpture in my hand and my cell phone on the table in front me.

"My mother left this for me before she took off. I found it a few years before Marcus was arrested. My father never allowed her to get me any sort of gift except the things he approved of first. He used to say that possession of material things was selfish. Whenever I got a toy or something for my birthday or Christmas, Marcus would take it and throw it away. And while this obviously is not a toy, it's really the only thing I've had of my mother."

"I can tell it means a lot to you."

"Yeah. Sometimes I'm glad I found it and other times I wish I didn't because it reminds me of her abandonment. Many times I've found myself ready to throw it against a wall and watch it shatter because that's how I felt when I found it. I just felt like disappearing so I wouldn't have to deal with all this."

"I don't blame you, Tobias. You have every right to feel that way."

"I know I was too young to understand but I hate that she chose to save herself and not me too. I feel like she never loved me like I thought she did. And if she didn't love me then Marcus loved me even less. I realized just how alone I was."

"You're not alone anymore. I'm here. And you have Zeke, Uriah, their mother and their girlfriends. You deserved to be loved."

I lean over and kiss her deeply. I sigh when we break apart.

"I don't know if I can do this. I barely held myself together when I saw her after I got her letter. I feel helpless. In some ways maybe her leaving hurt more than the scars on my back. I miss her and that makes me even more angry and frustrated."

She reaches out and gently caresses my face. "Can I ask you something, Tobias?"

I nod.

"Did you keep the letter?"

"Yeah, I did. Hold on." I get up and go to my study and retrieve the letter from one of the drawers on my desk. I return to the couch and hand it to Tris.

"You can read it."

"Out loud?"

I shrug. "If you'd like. I haven't read it in a while so I really don't remember everything she said."

"Okay." She takes my hand in one of hers while she holds the letter in the other and begins reading.

Dear Tobias,

By now you probably already know that I'm alive so I'm writing you this letter to confirm it. Please forgive for leaving you. Leaving you was the hardest decision I've ever made, but I did it because I thought I was protecting you. Now I see that I was wrong. I know what Marcus did to you. I felt terrible when I found out in the newspaper that he had been arrested and that you called the police on him after he beat you unconscious. Please believe when I say that I had no idea that he would hurt you too. I will spend the rest of my life trying to earn your forgiveness even though I know I don't deserve it. I've never stopped loving you and I am proud of you everyday. I have no doubt that you are a good man just like I knew you'd always turn out to be. I've heard from some acquaintances that you've enlisted in the Army. I'm so proud of you for that. You've always been brave and selfless. I know you will serve our country well and I will be praying for your safe return home. I hope one day we can meet face to face. Until then, I wish you well.

-Evelyn

Tris folds the letter back up and places it on the table next to where I've set the sculpture down. I don't know what to say.

"So you said you did meet up with her once, right?"

"Yeah. I decided to get it over with so we met at a restaurant in some hotel downtown where she was staying temporarily. She was actually living with someone but figured I would easily agree if we met up anywhere but there. Although I never asked her then, I have the feeling she might've had an affair and maybe that person helped her leave Marcus. I wouldn't necessarily blame her if I asked and she confirmed it. It probably wasn't too hard to find someone better than Marcus."

"What did she say when you met up with her?"

"Pretty much the same thing she wrote in the letter. I was angry so I showed her my scars. She was pretty upset. She said that the reason she came back to Chicago was to make amends me with me. She had only been back a few months but obviously had some connections so she was pretty settled with a part time job and all that. I told her that I was leaving soon and she had hoped we would have more time to talk, but I told her I wasn't ready even if I came back home. I'm not exactly ready yet but I know I have to do this."

"Are you gonna do it now?"

I nod. I reach for my phone and scroll through my contacts until I find her name. I take a deep breath as it starts ringing. It rings twice and I'm almost gonna hang up when I hear:

"Hello?"

"Hello Evelyn. It's Tobias."

"Tobias. It's been so long since I've heard from you. How are you?"

"I'm good. And you?"

"I'm doing well. Staying busy. I've started working full time so I don't have much free time. What about you?"

"That's good. I work downtown at Caesar's and when I'm not working I spend time with my friends and my girlfriend. I'm looking into going back to school eventually. I almost have enough savings for tuition and all that."

"Oh that's nice. I've heard good things about Caesar's, but I haven't been able to try it. And I'm glad that you have decided to continue your education. "

"Yeah I've been at Caesar's pretty much since it opened. I met the manager before it officially opened and he offered me the job then."

"That's great. I'm happy for you."

"Thanks. So, the reason I'm calling is because I got some news about Marcus."

"What's going on?"

"I got a call from the prison a few days ago that he's terminally ill. I went to see him because I will be in charge of arranging everything. He won't be transferred to a hospital or anything so he could die very soon. If you think you have some unresolved issues with him, you should go see him, but it's up to you. He didn't necessarily ask about you, but if you think you need to talk to him, I don't think it would hurt to do so."

"How was it for you seeing him?"

"Better than I expected. Of course, he was angry that I got him arrested but he acknowledged his mistakes. I don't know if I'll ever forgive him but, I plan on going back to see him one more time in a few days."

Well, I will think about it. Any chance I could see you too?"

"Things are hectic right now, but if you choose to attend Marcus' funeral we can figure something out then. Maybe for now we can plan to meet up the day after the funeral or something. I will send you the details when the time comes. He hasn't relayed his wishes to me yet, but I'm going to ask him when I see him again."

"Very well. I guess I'll see you soon then."

"Bye, Evelyn."

"Bye, son."

I hang up.

"Not so bad, huh?" Tris asks me.

I shrug. "I guess not. I knew she would ask to see me, but Marcus is my priority right now."

"I want to go with you when you go see him."

"Are you sure, Tris?"

"Yes, I want to be there for you. That's my job as your girlfriend."

I smile and kiss her gently. "Thank you, my love."