AN: Hi everyone! Here's another chapter of my Questioning!PossiblyFTM!Hephaestion series. I'm so glad I jut let it sit on here rather than saying it was complete, because things have started happening for me that I'm still grappling with. Just today, I realized that the name I chose for myself doesn't work anymore and I'm not sure what to do. This chapter deals with Hephaestion getting their (it's been awhile, so I still haven't decided where Hephaestion fits on the gender spectrum. They are most likely going to be FTM but I'm not sure at this point) first T-shot, because I just started the ball rolling on that myself. Nothing's set in stone yet, but writing tends to help me figure things out. Anyway, enjoy this new chapter!

Alexander and Hephaestion sat in the plush chairs of the gender clinic's small waiting room, Hephaestion holding onto Alexander's hand in a death grip, eyes closed so as to limit sensory input. Alexander could tell his love was beyond nervous, and had held Hephaestion the whole night before as they stayed awake and shook with nerves. He had promised them that they could cancel the appointment, but they wouldn't hear of it. So Alexander now sat calmly beside them and whispered sweet nothings into their ear occasionally a they waited.

Alexander knew Hephaestion was terrified of needles, but they had done their research and discussed it as a couple and figured it was an evil they could handle together.

"Hephaestion Amyntor?" A nurse called from a doorway to the doctor's offices behind it.

Hephaestion tensed, and wide, fearful eyes turned to stare at Alexander as he went to stand up.

"You want me to come with you, Love?" Alexander asked, smiling down at his other half, already knowing the answer. Just as he expected, the grip on his hand tightened, so he spoke again as Hephaestion stood up on shaky legs, "I won't leave you. I'm here. You'll feel so much better once it's over, I promise. I'm so proud of you."

As he guided his love into the indicated exam room, Alexander kept up a litany of praises, never once letting them go.

"Okay there?" The nurse gave them both a gentle, understanding smile.

"Doesn't do needles very well," Alexander answered with a matching smile, shushing Hephaestion when they gasped.

"Understood. Hephaestion, you don't have to watch. We can figure out how to get you your meds without your help. Would that make this easier?"

"I-I want it, I j-just-" Hephaestion tried to answer, still wide-eyed.

"No one is questioning what you want, darling, we're just trying to help. Shh, you're okay," Alexander cooed.

"It only takes a minute. One and done. I'll go get the stuff ready and then I can show you, okay? We can take as long as you need," with that, the nurse left the room.

"I can't do this, Xander."

Alexander lifted a hand to stroke his love's cheek, "Yes you can, Phai. You're being so brave, and I love you so, so much. I promise it won't seem so bad after this first time. I know it's scary, but I promise it will be okay. Have I ever lied to you?"

That got a ghost of a smile to cross Hephaestion's face, "No…"

"Then believe me in this. You will be okay, and you will feel so much better knowing you're taking the medicine," the nurse knocked, and returned to the room, holding a tray of everything needed to give Hephaestion their shot. With another reassuring smile, the nurse sat down on the rolling stool they always seemed to have at doctor's offices and presented the tray for Hephaestion to see. They blanched at the length of the needle but Alexander shushed them again.

"Here it is, Hephaestion. This is everything you need to take your meds."

Hephaestion pointed a shaking finger at the needle and spoke, "Why is it so-" they gulped, "long?"

"Your medicine has to go into your muscle to be the most effective, so we have to get past your layers of skin with the needle. It might sting, but it shouldn't cause any real pain." Alexander nodded beside them, listening closely and mentally taking notes, "The medicine might burn a little going in, and the injection might be a little sore, but if you're having real pain, you probably did something wrong. In that case, it's best to call in and ask. We'll help you no matter what you need. Okay?"

Again, Alexander nodded, face serious. If Hephaestion wasn't absorbing the fine details, Alexander sure was, and in that moment Hephaestion was unbelievably grateful for their boyfriend's support.

"Okay," they answered, then broke into a grin, "I'm ready. Thank you."

Alexander kissed their cheek, clearly excited for them, and then stood to help them to the exam table, where they lay on their side before the nurse found a spot on their thigh and readied the dose of medicine.

"Okay, Hephaestion, I want you to keep this leg as loose as you can and just breathe. It'll be over really soon, okay?"

They nodded as Alexander crouched so that he was in their field of vision, all smiles, "Almost there, Love!" he whispered, "Your first shot. I'm so proud of you!"

Hephaestion couldn't keep back the squeak at the pinch of the needle, and then the low groan at the burn of the medication, and then they heard the nurse peeling a bandage and declaring it was all over.

Suddenly Hephaestion was overcome with tears as Alexander helped the sit up.

"Oh, what is it, Love? Are you in pain?" Alexander asked gently.

They could only shake their head, unable to explain the rush of emotions. There was only one word that came to their mind as it was: relief. Unexplainable relief.

AN: I'm sure I didn't get everything 100% accurate, but the emotions are what are important here. When I asked for my HRT letter a few weeks ago, I couldn't look at my thighs without imaging the relief I would feel if I do get my first shot. I'm not sure why I knew I'd feel relief, but I knew I would and know I will. I hope you all enjoyed!