Disclaimer: I own nothing but the plot.

Toby aided Emily in carrying in the bags of drinks and party favors, Aria carried in a diaper cake taller than herself, and Veronica was going over the guest list and checklist while Melissa adjusted the balloons. They had all been working together to set up the most amazing baby shower for Spencer. She hadn't decided if she was keeping the baby or not, but at this point, there was hardly any going back. It was only a matter of time before she confided in them that she wanted to keep the baby. It didn't take this long to decide, certainly not for Spencer.

"When do the rest of the guests arrive?" Toby inquired, lining up the gift bags on the counter for the thirty-plus people who would be there. He had a feeling most of them were work friends, and he planned to stick around for the gender reveal. He was curious if it was a girl or a boy.

"Around three." Veronica spotted the flowers and marked it off the list. "Peter took Spencer to her appointment, and they'll be back around that time."

He nodded and looked over at Emily. "I hope she's in the mood for this today."

"Yeah, me too." She kept her voice low. "She's been in a bad mood since Hanna came to see her, and that four, five weeks ago."

"She's not one to let go," he reminded her.

"Yeah." She gestured to a bagged gift on the table. "Hanna sent that over. I told her I'd pretend it's from us, so just a head's up."

"Thanks. I'd hate to be the one to spill the beans on that." He balled up the empty bags and checked the time. They had about an hour until the guests arrived. "I'm gonna wait in the house for them."

"All right," Emily teased, "Uncle Toby."

He laughed. "What?"

"You heard me." She leaned against the counter with a smile on her lips. "If anyone loves that baby more than Aria and Melissa and Mrs. Hastings, it's gotta be you."

"That's not true. We…all equally love the baby." He tucked his hands into his pockets. "I'm just…glad to be a part of this."

"Uh-huh."

"Look, you're gonna make it awkward. I'm going up to the house. Goodbye, Emily." He smirked at her and walked out the door.

Emily snickered and returned to decorating the barn. Aria headed up to the house to chill with Toby, and Veronica cracked the whip down on the decoration and hors d'oeuvres since it was nearing that special time, and Emily slipped out to hang out with Aria and Toby as more and more guests arrived. It was lucky, too, because Spencer and Peter arrived at that exact moment.

"All right." Spencer set her phone and purse on the counter. "Let's get this over with. I am exhausted. I feel like I'm carrying a watermelon, and I have to pee for about the fourth time in two hours."

"That's an exaggeration, right?" Aria's brow furrowed in worry.

"Probably not." She put her hands on her hips. "Is it almost over yet?"

"You are in such a bad mood." Emily stood up and looped her arm through Spencer's. "Smile, Spence."

"I'm about to be swarmed by thirty of my mom's work friends," Spencer informed them. "You try smiling."

"Fair point."

"Let's go before Melissa finds us and drags us by our ears into the barn," Toby said.

"Forward, march." Aria smirked.

They all crowded into the barn for Spencer's baby shower, and it was a lot more pleasant than Spencer could have imagined. No one rubbed her belly without asking first, no one pressed about the father, and she had first dibs on all the foods. Al the foods. She was thrilled about that one fact, because it was almost all her favorites, only smaller. Little, tiny teasers. She would have downed an entire tray if her mom hadn't pull her away for conversation or if someone didn't ask her for a photo. Or she was raised with no manners.

Anyway, once the festivities died down but before presents were opened and the gender revealed, Spencer slipped away for some fresh air and found Toby had snuck away, too. She smiled at the sight of him and joined him, sitting down on the bench and exhaling.

"I thought you might want an escape." He peeked over at her, and she laughed. "So, how much do you hate it?"

"I don't hate it. It's actually been unexpectedly fun."

"I'm glad. We worked hard for this." He searched her face. "Hard for you."

"I know, and I appreciate all the work you all have done for me. I apologize for my bad mood. I just…didn't picture my life like this." She set a hand on her belly. "After our scare, I thought I'd be smarter." This she whispered, and it was full of shame and self-deprecation. Vulnerability in its rawest form splattered across her features.

"Spence…."

"No, Toby, I'm being serious. I didn't want a child in college, and I don't want one now," she confessed. "I can't take care of myself, let alone another vulnerable human being. I can't."

"Spence, you can do anything. I mean that—anything. You're the move driven person I have ever met, and you're a force of nature when it comes down to it. You can do this and do it remarkably well. You need to give yourself more credit and less stress. It's not good for you or the baby."

"Toby, you only believe in me, because you used to be in love with me. I'm not the same person. I'm not even a good person." She wiped at her eye. "How can I do this?"

"You are a good person. You're judging yourself too harshly. Just because Caleb didn't stay, doesn't meant the next won't. Or that he won't come around. I mean, you can't let one bad night cloud your entire life, Spence. You're resilient, and I do believe in you. Not because of what we once were, but because of who I've seen you become." He searched her face and smiled, taking a hold of her hand. "You are amazing, a wonder woman, and I know you can do this. You just need to have faith."

"I turned out a competitive, pill-abusing smartass with two parents; what the hell am I going to do being just one?"

"Raise one competitive, drug-avoiding smartass who loves their mother."

She smiled at him through her tears. "I love you, Toby."

"I know." He grinned at her. "I have something for you."

"What could you possibly have for me?"

"These." He reached beside him and placed a bag on her lap. "Here."

She looked and the white and multi-colored polka dotted bag, inhaling before reaching inside and pulling out a weird cloth, possible straight jacket for a baby. "What the hell is this?"

"It's a swaddle blanket. I uh, Googled best gifts for new mothers, and this list came up, so I went with this."

"This looks like a straight jacket." She laughed.

"It might be depending on your mood."

"Hey." She smacked him lightly.

"Look, I know things seem bleak, but you can do this. We all know you can. Why the else would we have thrown you a baby shower if you weren't going to keep it?"

"I thought I could donate the gifts to the new parents." She heaved a sigh. "I'm in. Aren't I?"

"Yeah, you are, but here's the good news: so am I. For the long haul, Spence." He squeezed her hand. "Anything you need."

"Anything?" She tilted her head to the side.

"Yeah."

"Thank you." She squeezed his hand back. "I really appreciate that—and you."

"Spencer!" Melissa called out in the yard. "Spencer, get back in here. It's time to cut the cake! Spencer Jill Hastings!"

"Wow, middle name," Toby snickered. "We better go."

"Yeah, help me up?"

"Here, lean on me."

They stood up and strolled back into the party, and Spencer took his words to heart. If anyone could get through to her right now, it was him. She didn't know why, but somehow in this mess, Aria and Emily's words fell on deaf ears, because they were friends. They were meant to be supportive by default, but Toby had no such commitments to her. He had no reason to be so supportive, beyond from the kindness of his soul and his loyal heart, as she was pregnant from his best friend. He was the best person to support her right now, and she was grateful for it. For him and her friends.

As for the gender reveal, Melissa had laid out a couple trash bags for an easy clean up while Toby placed a box in at the top of them. Aria offered to help Spencer pop the balloons, and on a group count of three, they both thrust a needle into the massively blown up black balloon, and out burst an equally massive amount of blue confetti and smaller blue balloons. Aria tossed her needle into the box and embraced Spencer happily, congratulating her, and Spencer could only stare. It'd became so real to her in that moment, knowing she was having a little boy, and maybe Toby was right. Of course Toby was right.

Once the shower was over, Spencer sat staring at the outfits laid out before her. They were so small and so soft. She couldn't believe a life she'd made would fit into them. It was bizarre and astounding, and she was taken away by it. She felt a stir of emotion inside of her, and she began to understand what her mother had said to her. Her situation was different now, and maybe it was better. And even if it wasn't better, she would make it better for her son.

It'd taken eight hours. Eight hours, forty-two minutes, thirty-nine seconds on a Thursday afternoon in the middle of October. It'd taken her mother and sister holding her hands and legs. It'd taken screams and powerful pushes and sweat and tears. It'd taken all of her energy and strength, but it was so worth it. Beyond worth it.

Spencer Hastings sat with her beautiful baby boy upraised on a pillow on her knees, looking him over as he was the most gorgeous person she had ever beheld. He was truly prefect, lying there and gripping her index finger with all of his tiny fingers. She kissed those fingers over and over, laughing softly as to not startle him, and he looked back at her with the same eyes as his father—beautiful, brown, rounded, soulful eyes. She couldn't drink them in enough, her eyes taking in their shared peach and cream complexion and wavy chestnut locks, and the way his tiny nose and his mouth resembled Caleb's.

She dipped her finger into the clef in his chin and chuckled through her tears, grinning at the beautiful baby boy she'd made. He was the love of her life, truly. He was someone she loved inordinately, and it was downright sickening. Goodness, to love another creature this much felt like the sweetest torture.

There was a knock on the door, Spencer looked over to see Toby, Emily, Aria and Allison, and she nodded for them to come in. They circled around her and her son, and oh-so carefully they passed him around to each member of their circle for assigned cuddles and pictures and forehead kisses until he returned to his mother, and Spencer felt the glaring absence from Hanna. She didn't let it show, but some of her tears were for the missing members of their usual five-some. Maybe one day they'd be able to get back what they had.

"He's perfect, Spencer." Aria snuffled and laughed. "He's so tiny."

"I know. Look at these fingers." She lifted her index finger to show them off as his fingers once more curled around her index finger. "These little nails."

Allison snickered. "He looks just like you, Spence. Good job."

"Hastings genes for the win, eh?" Toby mused, and she smiled at him. "He's beautiful and, yes, so tiny, but does he have a name yet?"

"Yes, he has a name." She wet her lips and announced, "This is Benjamin Luther Hastings-Rivers."

"Rivers?" Emily questioned. "You sure?"

She nodded. "I'm positive."

"Little Benji." Allison cooed, leaning over to stroke his baby fine hairs. "Welcome to the club, little one."

He fussed only slightly at the contact, but at Spencer's shushing, he calmed and opened his eyes once more to gaze at his mom.

"You're a natural." Emily sat down by her feet. "See? Nothin' to worry about."

"Oh, my God, Emily, I am so worried about everything it isn't even funny," Spencer commented with a weary laugh, and they chuckled at her tone. "Seriously, guys, don't laugh."

"We're here for you." Toby knelt beside the bed and gazed at the baby in her arms. "Hey, Benji, it's Toby. I am glad to finally meet you."

"We all are." Aria chipped in, "And we all love you so much."

"Uncle Toby the most," Emily mused.

"Uncle Toby?" Spencer arched a brow. "God, that's what he'll call you."

"And Auntie Em, Auntie Ari, Auntie Ali," Toby listed. "All the aunts and uncle a kid could need."

"Don't let Melissa hear that. She'll have you balls for sure," Allison commented, "for not including her."

Spencer chortled. "Sorry. That—wow, that was loud."

"It was just right." Toby smiled at her—at them—and looked over at the sound of shoes on tilted floor.

Veronica, Peter and Melissa entered the room for the third time since Benji had been born. Melissa pulled out her phone to take yet another photo, Veronica resisted the urge to squeeze in between Toby and Emily to hug her grandson, and Peter couldn't help but smile at the sight of his little girl with her little boy.

"Okay, on the count of three say Benji," Melissa advised the group as they squeezed in for a picture. "One. Two. Three."

"Benji!"

Spencer ran a hand through her hair to shake it out for any loose cereal pieces, looking over the case she'd taken from her mother's desk, and she quickly covered it with a photo album at the sound of a key turning in the front door. She looked over at her son who was snoozing away in his bassinet and then over to the door as her mother entered with a stack of mail.

"Hey, honey." Veronica smiled at her and sauntered over to her, handing out the mail. "Here, this is yours."

"Wow. How long have I been in here?" Spencer looked over the stack. "Jesus."

"Melissa was hording it." She looked over at her grandson and frowned at him being asleep. She wanted a quick lunch cuddle before she headed back to the office. "How's he doing?"

"Great." She spotted a thick envelope from a neighboring law firm and set the rest of the mail aside. "He must sleep like Caleb, because he doesn't sleep like me. He's out all night."

"That's good."

"Yeah." She opened the envelope and discovered it was from Blackbush and Hart. "Oh, my God," she whispered and read it over.

"What?" Veronica tore her eyes away from her grandson to her daughter. "Bad news?"

"Oh, my God!" She jumped off the stool and ran around the counter to show it to her mother. "Tell me it says this—actually says this."

Veronica took the letter from her daughter and read it aloud, frowning at the amazing but out of town opportunity for her daughter. "Wow, that's…generous."

"All for my work on the Walton case?" She shook her head. "How did they even know? I thought… I mean, wow." She cupped a hand to her mouth and laughed outright. "This is…incredible, Mom. I can't say no to this. I don't even want to."

"Hold on, Spencer." Veronica tossed the papers to the counter and caught her daughter's arm. "Are you sure about this? You have a newborn. Do you really want to uproot and move to a new town?"

"He's four months old, Mom." She folded her arms over her chest loosely. "I'm doing fine. I can handle being on my own with him."

"Spence, you have cereal in your hair."

She opened her mouth and shook her head before managing. "I was saving it for later, but since you've made it awkward." She blinded checked her hair for the piece of cereal until her mother came to her rescue and pulled it out.

She laughed at her daughter. "How did this even happen?"

"I wanted a snack while I fed him. I may have fallen asleep afterward." She cleared her throat. "But I can handle being a single parent. I can handle this new position. I want to try and tackle this all on my own, and if I fail then so be it. But what if I don't, Mom? What if I succeed? Hmm?"

"I know you will, but I'll miss you being out here in the barn. I'll miss our late-night talks. I'll miss seeing him first thing in the morning. And you, too, of course."

"Uh-huh."

"I'll support you whatever you decide."

"I want to try this," Spencer remarked. "I have to call them." She collected the front page and her cell phone to give them a call.

Veronica looked at her little girl who had grown up overnight, and she smiled proudly. She knew this was a necessary step in Spencer's life, and she would gladly support her in it. Who knew what kind of doors this would open for her? She could only hope they brought her back home one day.