A/N: So some of you may be thinking didn't she already post this chapter? The answer is yes and no. Yes I did post a chapter 9 already and no it isn't the same thing. After much debating with myself and some help from a friend, you know who you are, I realized that I owed it to myself and to you the readers out there to give this chapter more. After I posted the first one I knew that it was lacking in areas, so I re-read it and added some details in that were missing. If you want to re-read it I would absolutely love it because I feel horrible posting that lame excuse of a chapter.
And for those of you that didn't have to read my debacle of a first try, congrats!
Oh and BTW everything in BOLD is flashback FYI and italics is still thoughts.
Chapter 9: Your Guardian Angel Part 2
Rain, it was mocking her. Her tears weren't enough to suffer through, the tears of her family weren't enough, the heavens decided that they would shed their tears for the fallen angel. How could everything go so wrong? I did what he asked me to, I broke her heart, you'd think that'd be enough but noooo he had to go and hurt her. More tears trickled down her cheeks at the thought of Haley, her Haley, lying in a hospital bed hanging on for life. And it wasn't just her life, it was everyone's; everyone needed Haley, if her absence was any hint, she was the glue that held everyone together.
"Mommy I'm scared," Jamie cried lifting his head from Brooke's shoulder the tears sliding down his face.
"Me too baby, me too," Brooke brought a hand up to his little chubby cheek and wiped away the tears, just like she couldn't stand to see Haley cry it pained her even more to see her son cry.
What am I gonna do? What am I gonna do? What am I gonna do? Brooke furiously paced around the apartment not allowing her body to rest while her mind was still racing. I finally get her back and now he's threatening to take her away…what the hell! Who the hell does he think he is? He's an SOB that's who he is. "Ahhhhh!"
"What's wrong Auntie Brooke?" Jamie asked while climbing on the couch and sitting down.
Brooke let out a labored sigh. "Nothing buddy, nothing." She took a seat next to her nephew pulling him into her side.
"It didn't sound like nothing," Jamie grunted not liking the idea that his favorite aunt was hiding something from him. Jamie tried to wriggle free from his aunt's clutches but alas he wasn't strong enough. "Let…me…go!"
"Nah-ah," Brooke smirked knowing that Jamie was unsuspecting. Without a words notice Brooke started her tickle assault on Jamie's stomach.
"Stop…it…please…STOP!" Jamie yelled between giggles.
"Never," Brooke responded with an evil laugh. Over the past three months things had been great. She was really starting to feel a connection with her nephew that she had longed for since she found out about him. Sure she wanted to be a mother but as life would have it she was an aunt, she wasn't upset about it because quite honestly she would be happy with any relationship with Jamie. He was such an amazing little boy.
"Please Mommy stop," Jamie pleaded wanting this onslaught to cease.
Brooke froze, Mommy. Did he really just call me Mommy? Brooke looked down at Jamie seeing the fright in his eyes. "What's wrong buddy?"
Jamie immediately scurried away from Brooke making sure there was enough space as possible between them facing away from the startled brunette. He stiffened at Brooke's question knowing that he had slipped up. "Jamie?" Brooke asked nervously.
"Well…if it's okay with you…umm…do you wanna be my Mommy?" Jamie asked avoiding Brooke's gaze knowing that this was a big deal. He loved his Daddy and his Auntie Rachel but he never felt that strong of a connection with either of them, well not as strong as he did with his Mama and Auntie Brooke.
"I would love to be your Mommy," Brooke smiled as tears trickled from her eyes, I can't believe this is actually happening!
"Really?" Jamie's hopeful eyes were all Brooke needed to know that he genuinely wanted this.
"Really," Brooke smiled pulling him onto her lap engulfing him in a hug.
"If you really want this then why are you crying?" Jamie asked after he pulled away from Brooke's hug.
"They're happy tears Jamie I promise," Brooke smiled kissing him on the forehead.
"Okay Mommy," Jamie beamed gaining an equally big grin from Brooke.
Why did life have to be so cruel? Jamie, this sweet innocent child had to go through the pain of dealing with one of his parents being in a life or death situation. It just wasn't fair, none of this was.
"Any news?" Lucas asked resting a reassuring hand on Brooke's shoulder. This entire ordeal was hard on everyone in the Scott family but it seemed that Brooke was taking it the hardest and none of the Scotts were able to understand why. Sure they knew that Brooke and Haley were in love but it seemed that Brooke was taking this personally, much more personally than the rest. Brooke simply shook her head prompting more tears to flow. "Jamie why don't you come with me and we'll leave Auntie Brooke alone."
"No," Jamie protested burying his head further in the crook of Brooke's neck while wrapping his arms tighter around her neck. "I don't wanna leave Mommy."
"You won't be leaving Mommy we'll stay in the hospital," Lucas tried to reason not understanding why Jamie was getting so upset.
"No," Jamie cried again. "I don't wanna leave you Mommy," he said with tears welling in his eyes as he looked pleadingly at Brooke.
"Don't worry baby you aren't going anywhere," Brooke reassured before kissing his forehead. She was still feeling the cloud nine affects every time Jamie called her 'Mommy'. Her dreams had come true that day; nothing could've stopped her until…well until her life started to unravel.
"You're quiet, is everything alright?" Haley asked the concern evident. She and Brooke were walking through the moonlit streets of Tree Hill on their way to Tric. Haley, after much begging from Peyton, Deb and Karen, had agreed to play at Tric under her alias. She wasn't entirely trilled at the idea but it had been months since her last performance and she was itching to get back on stage her only hesitance in concerns to Brooke. She felt that if Brooke saw her on stage enjoying the double life she had created Brooke would think that she loved being Taylor and loved that life more and she didn't want anything along those lines crossing Brooke's thoughts. She loved her life as Haley Scott and she wouldn't trade it for the world.
"Yeah," Brooke sighed cringing at the lack of conviction behind her response, how the hell am I supposed to break her heart?
"That didn't sound too convincing," Haley frowned sensing that something was off with her girlfriend. "You can tell me anything, you know that?"
"Yeah I know…it's just that this is something that I don't want to do," Brooke exhaled knowing that it was now or never. It was getting close to eleven thirty and she wasn't about to risk Haley's life by being late, breaking her heart was enough to kill her, seeing Haley hurt would destroy her.
"And what is that?" Haley asked halting their movements not caring that they were standing in the middle of the street, Brooke was in distress and she was going to fix that no matter what. She rested her hands on Brooke's hips pulling her closer wanting Brooke to know that she was there for her, no matter what.
"I don't know how to say this," Brooke started shifting her gaze away from Haley. The closeness was calming yet killing her at the same time and Haley's eyes were boring into her with such concern that she couldn't breathe. Haley was being the perfect girlfriend, concerned, loving, caring, comforting, it was too much, Haley was doing everything right and yet she was about to have her world turned upside down.
"Just go with what seems right," Haley urged sensing that whatever was on Brooke's mind was big. She grew nervous when Brooke looked away, that was never a good sign. Brooke would usually look her in the eyes when they were talking, the only time she looked away was when she felt guilty.
What seems right, none of this seems right. Breaking your heart doesn't seem right, it isn't right…why the hell does this have to happen? She ran a frustrated hand through her hair using all her stalling tactics. "I've been seeing someone," she blurted out wanting the hell to end. Haley stepped back, withdrawing her hands from Brooke's sides, feeling the wind knocked right out of her lungs. Each breath became labored as she looked upon Brooke wondering if she had heard her right. She can't be cheating on me, she wouldn't…she loves me. The guilt etched on her face spoke thousands, she's cheating on me. "It's kinda a recent thing and I want to look into it, you know see where it goes." Haley took another disbelieving step back not understanding what was happening to her life. "Please say something?" Brooke pleaded after an excruciating silence.
She tried calming herself, taking slow deep breaths. She finally found her voice "I hope everything works out for you," that's all I come up with, she just broke my fucking heart and that's all I come up with. "I know that this sounds strange but I really do hope everything works out for you Brooke…" and the lies keep coming. "… I really wished that I could've been the one to make you happy but I know that I screwed my chances up a long time ago. But I want you to know, that no matter what happens between us…the song I wrote for you, I still mean every word. I'd do anything for you Brooke Davis and that won't change no matter what," Haley smiled weakly before turning and started walking away. What a load of bull 'I'd do anything for you' what the hell was I thinking?
"Haley," Brooke yelled desperately, why isn't she fighting for me.
"Just don't Brooke, ok?" Haley sighed the annoyance evident. She really didn't want to fight Brooke on this, she's the one ending things, shouldn't she be happy that I'm walking away? "You deserve better than me Brooke and I just hope that you've found it," Haley said without turning around, she couldn't face Brooke, she couldn't let her see the tears that were forming. She knew deep down that Brooke was better off without her, she deserved a chance for a family and to be with someone that would never hurt her in the way that she had. "Anyway shouldn't you be happy that I'm just rolling over, I don't see why you want to fight about this…unless," this is payback for leaving.
"Haley please," Brooke pleaded needing to see her face. "Listen to me!"
"No! Why should I listen to you?" Haley spun around fuming. She was beyond pissed at Brooke, she was being used for some sick plot of payback…no she wasn't being used she and Jamie were being use, how dare she involve him, he did nothing to hurt her. "You used…" the growing head lights hurtling towards them ripped Haley from her rant. As on instinct, Haley ran at Brooke shoving her until she was clear of the car not being able to escape that fate herself. The pain was searing, burning, and strong…until everything went black.
Brooke moaned slightly feeling the pain swell in her head. She sat up gingerly not liking the throbbing passing from one temple to the other. All thoughts of her injuries ceased when she saw Haley sprawled out on the pavement. She got to her feet and sprinted over to Haley "Haley…hunny…wake up," Brooke pleaded slightly shaking her needing her to wake up. "Please help me my girlfriend was hit by a car…" Brooke cried to the 9-1-1 operator.
"Has anyone tried to talk to her?" Nathan asked looking upon a very broken and distraught Brooke. Like everyone else in the waiting room Nathan knew that Brooke was taking this hard but he didn't see the sense in her baring herself from the rest. This was a time when family needed to pull together, not separate.
"I tried but I don't think anyone is going to get through to her," Lucas sighed burying his head further in his hands. "I think she's blaming herself for what happened."
Nathan sighed knowing exactly what Lucas meant. Once he found out who hit Haley he knew that there was something behind his actions, shit like that doesn't go unprovoked, he must've wanted something from Brooke. But what? Nathan looked back at Brooke, she had separated herself from the group, putting as much distance the private waiting area would allow between them. News of the accident had spread rather quickly considering that one of the Women's National Soccer team members was involved and the paparazzi was all over it surrounding the hospital asking anyone and everyone questions that no one had the answers to. Haley's doctors were gracious enough to offer them a private room where the paparazzi wouldn't be able to bother them. "I'll try," Nathan sighed lifting himself from his chair. "I know it's a stupid question but how you holding up?" He gently asked taking a seat across from Brooke. She was clutching to Jamie like her life depended upon it and that scared him, Jamie didn't need that type of pressure especially given the circumstances that they found themselves in.
"Not good," Brooke choked out, her voice hoarse from tears shed and unshed. She took a couple ragged breaths before continuing. "This day was going so great until he…" she trailed off as her will power dissolved allowing the tears to fall, the thought of all that had happened and all that's to come was pushing her closer and closer to the edge. Images of Haley sprawled on the pavement kept flashing through her mind, tormenting her in every way possible.
"We don't have to talk about it, I just want you to know that I'm here for you, we all are," Nathan said gesturing to the group on the other side of the waiting room. "We're in this together and nothing is going to change that."
Brooke laughed bitterly, if they only knew. "You wouldn't be saying that if you knew."
"Then why don't you tell me," Nathan slightly urged wanting to hear what Brooke had to say but not wanting to push her at the same time.
"Jamie," Brooke whispered shaking the small boy slightly. She didn't want Jamie hearing what she had to say, it was too hard, she couldn't stand the thought of what Jamie would think of her after everything that happened. She heard him mumble softly before wrapping his arms tighter around her neck. "Jamie, wake up," she nudged him again only this time he lifted his head from her shoulder.
"What's going on Mommy?" He asked the sleep evident in his voice. "Is Mama ok?"
"I don't know sweetie but I need you to go over there with Grandma and Grandpa for a second so I can talk to Uncle Nathan," Brooke spoke keeping her voice light and gentle. Despite the heart break and depression she felt she didn't want Jamie to sense any of that, he needed all the hope and support possible.
"I don't wanna leave you," Jamie pleaded tears forming in his eyes. Haley was lying in the hospital, condition unknown and Brooke was the only one that made him feel safe, well safe like Haley did.
"It'll only be for a minute and you'll be able to see me," Brooke reasoned. Jamie wordlessly slid from Brooke's lap making his way over to the other group. Brooke watched as he climbed onto Deb's lap and curled up into the same position he was in earlier.
"Mommy?" Nathan asked with a lightness in his voice that eluded him since the accident.
"Yeah," Brooke smiled. "Something recent, he asked me today if I wanted to be his Mommy."
"That's great Brooke," Nathan smiled grabbing her hand and giving it a gentle squeeze. He could tell that this meant everything to her, being a mother, it just sucked that it had to happen under these conditions. Ever since they first met she would talk and dream about being a mom one day, and know it is coming true, but at what cost? "How does Jake feel about that?"
"I didn't even get a chance to tell him…Haley doesn't even know," Brooke sighed the sadness returning. "Everything was just so crazy that I never got a chance to tell her and now…" she trailed off as more tears fell from her eyes sliding effortlessly down her cheek following in the path of its predecessors.
"Don't think that way, you WILL get a chance to tell her," Nathan assured sternly wanting Brooke to know that Haley was going to pull through.
"How do you know?" Her defeated tone going to new heights, never before had she felt so lost and alone.
"Because she's a fighter," he squeezed her hand again. "She didn't give up when Damien was beating her and she didn't give up when she came back, she fought for what she loved and she's not about to let this stop her."
"Damien hit her with his fist not a car," Brooke cried. "You didn't see her lying there, she wasn't breathing Nathan, she wasn't breathing." Nathan pulled her into a hug before she could continue. "This is all my fault."
"Shhhh, none of this is your fault," Nathan soothed knowing that Brooke had just reached her breaking point. He felt the same way when he found out about Haley's relationship with Damien, to him it was the natural way to feel, take the blame upon yourself because you don't know who to blame. He blamed himself for not seeing the signs, for not noticing the pain his baby sister was going through and he still hated himself for not noticing, but there was nothing he could do about it. And there was nothing Brooke could do about it, he was the one that hit her not Brooke.
"Yes it is," Brooke pulled back forcefully. "I took too long, if I had just done it sooner then she wouldn't be lying in that OR fighting for her life."
"Brooke, what are you talking about?" Nathan asked suddenly realizing that blame wasn't the cause for Brooke's torment, guilt was and that didn't settle well with him.
"He told me that if I didn't break her heart before midnight that he was going to hurt her," Brooke cried feeling every fiber in her being tremble. The truth was out there for all to judge and she was ready, she was ready for the hatred and pain just as long as Haley pulled through she would willingly take all the blame. "I must've took too long and he…" more tears spilled as the truth continued to pour out.
"Brooke, what're you talking about? Why would he threaten to hurt Haley if you didn't break her heart?" He was beyond confused at this point, nothing seemed to be making any sort of sense.
"He thought that if I broke her heart she would go back to him. He knew that the only way I would follow through would be to hurt Haley. I did what he asked of me, I broke her heart and now she's lying there, fighting for her life and she thinks that I don't love her. If she dies and I never…" she couldn't hang in any longer, the tightening in her chest stopped her from talking, stopped her from breathing, stopped her from feeling as she fell to the floor her world came crashing around her, the darkness consuming her.
That's all for chapter 9.
So I hope you liked this one more, if you already read the first try, and I hope that this one seems more up to par.
If you want to review again please go ahead, I love them no matter what.
The next chapter will answer all you questions pertaining to the accident, who, why, and what will they think? I won't rush this next chapter because that is what got me into trouble with this one. I rushed it because I felt that I had to get it up so you could enjoy. This one I know won't take me as long as the last one but I'm going to make sure that it lives up to my standards.
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