One evening, Emily was idling by herself at Knapford Station after a long day of work on the line. Thomas was not at home at this time. He had left for China, out to see the world again for some of the places he either missed the chance to see, or didn't spend the time he hoped in a country or two. Not having Thomas around made Emily feel lonely from time to time again. Even though he'd be back in March to share some stories and spend a few months on Sodor again, Emily still wondered what she could do to help pass the time. And this evening, she'd be passing time in a rather interesting, and eventually very funny way.
David came by the platform and saw her. "Hello, Emily. How have you been?"
"Alright, I guess," said Emily. "Quite busy today…and a little lonely without Thomas around."
"I know, Emily," said David. "But this year is bound to be easier, with him coming back every now and then to share different kinds of stories. In the meantime, is there anything you'd like to do? Perhaps with Percy or me?"
Emily heard David, then suddenly remembered something she had scarcely thought much about since it happened. She had never talked much about this with anyone…but with Thomas out in the world again, and David to talk to whenever she felt the need, perhaps she could share a little story of hers. A rather unusual and strange story, but maybe could garner some interest from her Navy friend.
"David...why don't you come with me to Knapford Sheds?" she offered. "There's something I'd like to share with you."
"Of course, Emily," said David. He got onboard and off they went.
When they arrived at Knapford Sheds, Emily felt a tad lonely not to have Thomas or Percy here with her, but she kept her perks up at what she had in mind for David. He got out of her cab and walked up to her buffers.
"So, Emily. What do you wish to share with me?" asked David.
"There's a little story I'd like to tell you, David," said Emily. "Have you ever heard of Misty Island and the engines who work there? They're called the 'Logging Locos.' Peculiar engines I must say, especially in the way they work together."
"No, Emily. I don't recall hearing any of that sort," said David.
Emily briefed David about these engines. How Thomas met them when he got lost on Misty Island, how they helped him find his way home, and how they had little adventures and escapades with two other engines on Sodor. David learned a little about Gordon and Ferdinand and Toby and Bash's experiences together, which made him frown and sigh with slight disgrace.
"Those sound rather childish to me, Emily," he said. "This Ferdinand character sounds so goofy that he'd have to be seen to be believed, and Bash sounds rather weird to me too."
"Ferdinand is certainly goofy, no doubt," said Emily. "And Bash and Dash are a little quirky even for me…but there is one story I'd really like to share. About Dash and me."
David suddenly looked intrigued. "There is?" he asked.
"Yes, David," said Emily. "You see, the Fat Controller was rewarding each Logging Loco for their work on Sodor by having them work with one of us. Gordon worked with Ferdinand, Toby worked with Bash…and I worked with Dash. And while all three engines' experience was rather goofy and weird at best…I think my experience with Dash is the most worth talking about, of all of them."
"Hmm," pondered David. "What was it about?"
"Well," said Emily. "It was all about a little game of theirs called 'Warbling Whistles.' It's actually kind of interesting."
David climbed onto Emily's running plate and saw down. "I'd like to hear that story, Emily."
Emily smiled. "Of course, David. I'd enjoy a little storytime with you." So Emily began, and David listened…
Early one morning, Emily roared and raced to Misty Island. The Fat Controller had a Special for her.
At the logging camp, the Logging Locos were playing their favourite game, Warbling Whistles. Over their years of working on the rails, these three engines had learned a way to play different pitches on their whistles by puffing up their cheeks and writhing them every which way, which made the steam pressure in their whistle behave differently, which made their whistle pitches go higher and lower by the second.
Emily puffed proudly in. "Hello, Logging Locos," she greeted.
Bash, Dash and Ferdinand chuffed chirpily. "Hello, Emily!"
"The Fat Controller is coming," said Bash.
"To give me my reward for being Really Useful!" said Dash.
"That's right," finished Ferdinand, as usual.
Just then, the Fat Controller arrived on Thomas. "Today is the Children's Steam Fair. Emily, your Special is to take Dash to the fair. Your reward, Dash, is to be the Star of the Fair."
Bash and Dash whistled and whooped with joy. Thomas was surprised. Their whistles warbled like tweeting and twittering birds.
"Bubbling boilers!" exclaimed Thomas. "I've never heard an engine tweet like a bird. The children will be excited to hear you."
Emily had heard the Logging Locos tweeting and twittering too. She wanted to tweet and twitter like them. The idea of making her whistle sound like a singing bird sounded absolutely endearing.
"How do you whistle like that?" she asked.
"You chuff out your cheeks, and you scrunch up your eyes…" said Bash and Dash.
"Then you huff and you puff…" said Ferdinand.
"And the twitters will rise!" They all said at once and began twittering away again.
Emily watched. "That's easy."
"It's very, very hard," admitted Bash.
"It takes a long, long time…" said Dash.
"To learn!" they said together, followed by Ferdinand once again.
"That's right."
Emily sniffed and snorted. "It won't take me a long, long time. I shall learn on my way to the Steam Fair. Very, very quickly."
Emily and Dash wheeshed along, off of Misty Island and onto Sodor. As they huffed along side by side, Emily could not stop thinking about what she saw and what she heard from the Logging Locos. She was very eager to see if she could warble her whistle the same way they did.
"I'll twitter and tweet. I'll soon find the way. It can't be that hard, whatever they say," she said.
And so, Emily tried it herself. She took a deep breath and puffed up her cheeks. As she writhed them back and forth, both cheeks bulging and shrinking together, she listened. Indeed, her whistle certainly made a different noise than she could recall. But it wasn't exactly a tweet or warble. Instead, it was more like a person whistling higher and lower notes. Her whistle's notes just went up and down until she gasped for air.
Emily and Dash huffed up to a junction. Emily wanted to know exactly how it was done in time for the Steam Fair.
"Please show me once more," she said to Dash.
"Of course I will, Emily. But be careful. Twitters and tweets use a lot of-"
"Fuel." Emily wasn't bothered by fuel.
"First, you chuff out your cheeks…"
Emily chuffed and chuffed until her cheeks were rosy red. Then, Gordon steamed grandly by. He was on his way to the Steam Fair. Gordon stopped.
"Oh, dear, Emily! Whatever's the matter?" he asked.
Emily felt silly. She gasped for air and wondered why it wasn't working with her like it did with Dash.
Gordon grinned. Dash twittered and tweeted.
"My, my, Dash. The children will like that. That's a special trick!" said Gordon.
Emily was cross. She wanted to do the special trick. So Emily huffed huffily away. Emily and Dash clickity-clacked along the track.
"I'll twitter and tweet. I'll soon find the way. It can't be that hard, whatever they say!" she said again.
She bulged her cheeks again and writhed them left and right. This time, her warbles were slightly higher, but still, no tweet came from her whistle. Emily and Dash huffed to a quiet siding.
"Please show me again," she said.
Dash was worried. "Emily, I could run out of-"
"Fuel. I'm sure you won't," said Emily.
"Very well. First, you chuff out your cheeks, then you scrunch up your eyes…"
Emily did what Dash said and tried hard, but even now, no twitters or tweets came from her whistle. Just then, Charlie whooshed by on his way to the Steam Fair. He screeched to a stop and giggled.
"Trembling tracks, Emily! What's happened to your face? You look very funny!"
Charlie chuckled cheerfully. Emily felt even sillier. Dash twittered and tweeted.
"Bust my buffers! That's a special trick!" cheered Charlie.
Emily felt even crosser that she couldn't do the special trick. So she grumped grumpily away. Emily and Dash rattled and raced.
"I'll twitter and tweet. I'll soon find the way. It can't be that hard, whatever they say!" she exclaimed a little desperately.
She tried once again, and while the warbles certainly came though, there was still to tweet. Emily's face and eyes flickered little before she stopped and frowned, rather frustrated at this point. Emily and Dash stopped at another siding.
Dash was even more worried. "I can't puff again, Emily. I'll run out of-"
"Fuel. Don't worry," said Emily. By this point she was too stubborn to give up until she succeeded.
Dash pumped his pistons. As he spoke, Emily tried so hard, her axles shook, yet no sound escaped her whistle.
"You chuff out your cheeks, and you scrunch up your eyes, then you huff and you puff and the twitters will…"
Just then, Hiro rolled by on his way to the Steam Fair. He hushed to a halt. "Emily, your face is very strange," he said with concern and care. "I must tell the Fat Controller at once."
"Don't do that, Hiro!" Emily gasped and groaned. "Pump your pistons, Dash! We must huff to the Fair."
Then there was trouble. Dash couldn't pump his pistons. Dash had run out of fuel.
"Don't worry, Emily. I'm sure you will twitter and tweet without me…" he uttered with disappointment.
Emily felt bad for Dash. In spite of some of the utter silliness she had learned about the Logging Locos from Thomas, she couldn't help but feel sorry for him. But she hoped beyond hope that maybe she could perform the trick for the children. Emily steamed into the fair. The children had heard about the twitters and tweets. Emily chuffed out her cheeks. She scrunched up her eyes. Then she stopped. The children watched. The children waited.
"Fizzling fireboxes! I can't remember what to do next!" she panicked.
The children were disappointed. Emily felt terrible. She had been a really silly engine. She had let Dash down. She had let the children down. Now she had no time to lose.
"Children, I will bring Dash to you," she promised. "He can twitter and tweet perfectly. It's his special trick!"
"Hooray!" the children cheered as she went on her way.
As Emily rushed past Dash, he looked up glumly.
"Don't worry, Dash!" she called. "I'll help you!"
Soon, Emily pulled up to Dash, with a flatbed of wood. "I've brought you fuel."
"Thank you, Emily," Dash beamed.
Emily was happy to help Dash. Now Emily wasn't thinking about twitters and tweets. She wanted to make the children happy. Emily and Dash chuffed back to the Steam Fair. The children were laughing at Charlie's jokes. They saw Emily. Then they saw Dash. The children squealed and squeaked for joy.
"Here's the Star of the Fair!" Emily announced proudly.
Dash puffed forward proudly. "You chuff out your cheeks and you scrunch up your eyes, then you huff and you puff and the twitters will rise!"
The children cheered and clapped. Dash giggled and jiggled. And Emily laughed so hard, her whistle warbled and she twittered and tweeted. When she heard it, her eyes widened and she smiled excitedly. She had done it at last. Her whistle's tweets sounded just like a singing bird, which made her heart take flight as she heard Dash and the children cheer for her.
"That was worth…" began Dash.
"Waiting for!" And Emily felt happier than ever.
"Well, David…what do you think?" asked Emily.
David stood there, absorbed. What he heard sounded rather goofy and weird, and a little childish…and yet, there was something that had kept his interest the whole time.
"What do I think?" he said. "Well, Emily…that sounds like a rather juvenile phase for you to go through. But I can't help but like how it involved you. The best way I can describe this story is…weird, but cute."
"Cute?" asked Emily.
"I can't help but feel so," said David. "I never knew steam engines could still make a whistling sound by puffing up his or her face. Most interesting. Actually, now that I've heard this story…let me see you do it, Emily! Please? Ple-e-ease?"
Emily smiled. "Alright, David."
David stepped down from her running plate so he could see. Then, for the first time in quite a long time, Emily puffed up her cheeks, making them bulge. As soon as she did this, David thought she looked absolutely adorable. He watched as she writhed her cheeks every which way, bulging them bigger and smaller than each other. And indeed, as she did this, her whistle warbled high and low notes, constantly changing the note to how her cheeks bulged.
David cupped his hands together and shook his head, smiling hugely. Oh, how adorable Emily looked with her lovely cheeks puffing up like balloons, accompanied by funny little warbles from her whistle!
"Goodness gracious me, Emily!" David chimed with a little jig. "That is SO cute! You look adorable!"
Emily giggled. "I do, David?"
"Of course!" he replied. "See for yourself!" He drew a mirror and Emily warbled again.
As she saw her bulging cheeks and how they moved to her warbling whistle, she felt her heart flutter most innocently until she gasped to breathe again.
"You're right, David. I do look adorable!" she laughed.
David climbed up and kissed her cheek. "I rather enjoyed hearing that story, Emily. I don't care if it sounds juvenile, it certainly made you look cute!"
Emily blushed as they quieted down for a few moments…until one more idea flew into David's head.
"Actually, Emily, one other thing…you say that your whistle twittered and tweeted because you laughed so hard…well, now that you've told me this story, it's given me an idea. Let me tell you a little joke that will surely make your whistle twitter and tweet again."
As David talked, Emily looked up and started to have a fantasy in her funnel, picturing what David was describing with the joke.
"There was once a silly little tank engine who looked like Bash and Dash, and wanted to warble, twitter and tweet with his whistle. But he failed to realize his steam ports and pipes were rather clogged, which made him unable to let off steam. He simply could not get up to speed and wanted to amuse himself. He puffed up his cheeks, scrunched up his eyes…but the twitters simply would not rise."
Emily envisioned the tank engine puffing up his cheeks like she did as David continued.
"His boiler slowly began to bulge and swell as the pressure became more and more powerful. The suspense was building…"
Emily suddenly heard an inflating sound. She looked down and saw David blowing up a balloon until it was as big as his head. Then he held onto the balloon and came to the best part of the joke.
"His boiler got bigger and bigger, like a balloon. Then suddenly, without warning, that engine's safety valve burst so intensely, that he shot straight into the air like a mighty rocket, his boiler squealing and sputtering like a balloon squiggling through the air!"
And David let go of the balloon as it sputtered and squealed through the shed every which way, while Emily envisioned the tank engine rocketing through the air at the same time.
"His steam endlessly rocketed and spewed out from behind him as he whizzed every which way, until at last, he shot back downwards, straight into a muddy pool! As his safety valve was still bursting away, the mud began bubbling furiously like the bubbles from a soda water bottle, just as Oliver and Toad passed by. 'A pond is the only place for a toad, I suppose,' said Oliver, winking behind him to Toad."
Emily's little vision stopped as she looked down at David with a giant smile, who smiled back, waiting to the watch the result. It was worth watching. Emily just stared at David. Then one second later…it happened.
"PFFT! HA-HA-HA-HA-HAAH!" Emily shrieked with laughter. She was laughing so loudly and so hard, her running plate began to shake wildly. David had to jump off. He looked back at her and could see her face turning bright red as her bursts of laughter kept erupting more and more.
"HAH…HA-HA-HA-HA! I've N-never…Never in my…!" Emily squealed before she let off a large cloud of steam and continued to laugh very hard. Then suddenly, she and David heard it.
Emily's whistle began twittering and tweeting wildly. Emily stopped laughing and looked back, listening to her whistle, her eyes twinkling with joy. It sounded just like it did when she laughed with Dash and the children…only this time, it sounded more cheerful and birdlike and the tweets continued for a while longer until they stopped. She starred at David, holding her smile of joy.
"That sounded beautiful, Emily," David smiled at her. Then he winked. "That was worth…"
"Waiting for!" Emily cheered happily. "All thanks to you, making me laugh so hard!"
She almost laughed again but managed to withhold it. David felt very happy he was able to make Emily laugh so hard, especially given that Thomas wasn't around. It was certainly a hilarious surprise for both of them.
Then Emily yawned sleepily. "Ohh…David. I'm plenty tired now. I think that joke did the trick. Thank you."
"Not at all, Emily. Thank you, for sharing that little story…so I could make you laugh," David winked as he climbed onto her running plate again and folded his sailing coat into a pillow again.
"Goodnight, David," Emily whispered.
"Goodnight, Emily dear," David whispered as he kissed her cheek.
Soon they both fell asleep. But only a few minutes later, Emily began to giggle ever-so slightly in her sleep. Through her closed eyes, she could still see little flickers of the joke she envisioned through David's words. Little chirps of laughter escaped her mouth, which soon influenced David's sleep too.
"Hm-hm...He-he-he…heh…" he uttered quietly as he turned his head and coat a little inward toward Emily's chin to feel her soft, warm skin.
"Hm-hm-hm…that's so funny, David…" Emily giggled in her sleep.
"Ahh, it's nothing. Mmm…" David murmured.
For a few minutes more, Emily and David continued to giggle and stir in their sleep, having little flickers of thought about that joke, until sleep managed to drift in deep enough for of them to sleep peacefully. It had been quite a considerable evening for Emily and David. A little story to tell, followed by an absolutely hilarious joke before settling with each other's company. And so they slept peacefully together all through the night.
So...why adapt "Emily and Dash" of all episodes? The truth is, honestly, "Emily and Dash", especially nowadays is a sort of guilty pleasure for me. Don't get me wrong, the episode is bad, the writing and overall concept of the story is terrible...but, for some reason, I find myself enjoying it way more than I ever should. I think what kinda "saves" it for me is the UK version, specifically Teresa Gallagher's performance. I've gone on and on about how much I love Teresa's performance as Emily, but "Emily and Dash", despite its terrible writing and story, might just be one of, if not Teresa Gallagher's best performances as Emily. I'm serious, her performance is so good that it helps salvage the entire thing for me, I just absolutely love how increasingly annoyed and frustrated Emily sounds the more she keeps trying and failing to do 'warbling whistles', even if her frustration is reasonable because that entire concept is terrible. Also, Emily is so goddamn ADORABLE whenever she tries to do the whistle. Granted, it's still a bad episode, but I can never hate it. So, leave your reviews and we'll see you next time.