Day 9: Only Us
A/N: A continuation of Chapter 7, "All I Want Is You," which takes place in The Snow King verse. The lyrics took me directly here. I have included the end of that chapter as a brief reminder of where we last left Kurt and Blaine.
"Do you think so little of me?" Kurt questioned gently, squeezing Blaine's hand for emphasis. "Blaine, I have met dozens of 'equals,' as you call them – kings, queens, nobility, people with wealth and power beyond compare. None of them, not a single one, has ever moved me or touched my heart the way that you have. It doesn't matter to me whether you have all the riches in the kingdoms or not." Kurt placed a finger beneath Blaine's chin, guiding his head up and locking their gazes once more. "Blaine," he said sincerely, "all I want is you."
Blaine's mind reeled in his heart raced at Kurt's declaration. It was everything he had been hoping to hear for weeks. All he wanted to do was lean in the few tiny inches it would take to press his lips to Kurt's. He was stopped by a nagging voice in the back of his head.
"Kurt, I…" he faltered, desperately searching for the words to properly express his thoughts. Kurt's countenance fell, interpreting the pause as a sign of rejection. "No! No, no, Kurt," Blaine rushed out, grasping Kurt's hand tightly. "Please don't misunderstand."
"It's okay, Blaine," Kurt said sadly. "I'm sorry if I misinterpreted your feelings."
"It isn't that, not at all. I feel exactly the same way that you do. It's just, well, this isn't only about us, is it?" Blaine asked. "If it were only about you and me, you would be in my arms this second and I'd never let you go. But you are the king, Kurt. What about your people? You have to do what is best for them. Will they really accept a cast-off prince for their king?"
Kurt sighed in relief, feeling the warm blush in his cheeks at the thought of being held in Blaine's arms. But as much as he wanted to gather Blaine to him and kiss him senseless, he apparently needed to clear up one more thing with his dear prince.
"Is that what you're worried about?" Blaine nodded, and Kurt shook his head in fond exasperation. "Blaine, I owe a lot of things to my people. I owe them my strength, my loyalty, my leadership, and my compassion – but my heart is my own to do with as I choose. Yes, there may be some who will express doubt or dissatisfaction with us, but that does not matter to me. I have dealt with people who want me to be something other than myself my whole life," he went on, squeezing Blaine's hand for emphasis as he added, "as have you. Yet here we are, still ourselves. Think how much stronger we will be facing them together."
Blaine held Kurt's gaze for a moment, letting Kurt's words to wash over him. It had been a long time since Blaine had allowed himself to really hope. Even before coming out to his father, their relationship had been strained. During the years that he kept his inclinations a secret, he didn't dare allow himself to dream of ever being able to love someone openly. It was little wonder, then, that he found himself having difficulty letting go of the doubt and giving in to his desire to be with the man beside him.
Kurt could see Blaine struggling. He would never try to push Blaine into doing something he did not want. He could see, though, that Blaine didn't doubt his own feelings. His only hesitation was that being together might not be the best thing for Kurt. How was he supposed to make Blaine understand?
Of course! There was always one way that Kurt could express his feelings perfectly. Releasing Blaine's hand, he turned on the piano bench and began playing the melody of a song he loved but never fully understood until this moment. He sang the lyrics softly, turning to catch Blaine's eye in between glances at the keys.
I don't need you to sell me on reasons to want you
I don't need you to search for the proof that I should
You don't have to convince me
You don't have to be scared you're not enough
'Cause what we've got going is good
Both of them had been through their own struggles, but Kurt truly believed there was something special between them and that they could move forward together if they tried.
I don't need more reminders of all that's been broken
I don't need you to fix what I'd rather forget
Clear the slate and start over
Try to quiet the noises in your head
We can't compete with all that
He felt Blaine shift beside him on the bench, moving ever so slightly closer as the last boundaries between them dissolved.
So what if it's us?
What if it's us and only us
And what came before won't count anymore or matter?
Can we try that?
His voice grew stronger in the refrain, hoping that Blaine would understand the meaning he was trying to convey.
What if it's you and what if it's me
and what if that's all we need it to be
and the rest of the world falls away?
What do you say?
Kurt's hands stilled on the keys as he looked into Blaine's eyes. Blaine smiled and began playing himself. If Kurt could believe in them so strongly, if he could see beyond Blaine's circumstances and love him for himself, what more could he ask?
I never thought there'd be someone like you who would want me
So I give you ten thousand reasons to not let me go
But if you really see me
If you like me for me and nothing else
Well, that's all that I've wanted for longer than you could possibly know
Kurt brought up his arm behind Blaine and rested a hand on his back, needing some sort of physical contact. He could feel the happy tears forming as Blaine opened his heart to him.
So it can be us
It can be us and only us
And what came before won't count anymore or matter
We can try that
Kurt rested his head on Blaine's shoulder as they began to sing together, sometimes in harmony, sometimes trading off lines, but always in sync with one another as if they had been singing together forever.
It's not so impossible
Nobody else but the two of us here
Cause you're saying it's possible
We can just watch the whole world disappear
Till you're the only one I still know how to see
It's just you and me
It'll be us
It'll be us and only us
And what came before won't count anymore
We can try that, you and me
That's all that we need it to be
And the rest of the world falls away…And it's only us.
As soon as the last note faded, Blaine surged forward and captured Kurt's lips with his own. Just as the song promised, the world fell away.
A/N: I hope no one was too bored with my use of the full lyrics, but they were just so perfect in the context of this verse that I couldn't resist including them. The song is, of course, Only Us from Dear Evan Hansen, written by the brilliant Pasek and Paul. Give it a listen.