Chapter Note: Slight AU, in which Chizuru is a normal human woman and Okita does not have tuberculosis. Also a play off of Okita's route in Zuisouroku, where Chizuru impersonates a geisha in order to help the Shinsengumi. The quote below is from his route.

Sake Drops in Teacups

"Can't say I was ever interested in geisha, but…if I'd be allowed to see that girl again, I get the feeling I'd go every day."

Part I: Paper Sakuras

Souji wasn't a particularly patient person. Nor was he easily amused, but it wasn't all that long ago that trips to the Sumi teahouse in Shimabara with the other Shinsengumi captains could put him at his most content.

Right now though, it was safe to say that not even the food and alcohol in front of him could make Shinpachi and Heisuke's obnoxious antics any less grating to his ears.

"Aw, it really is good to have you back, punk!" Shinpachi drunkenly leaned over on Heisuke, spilling sake on him in the process. Heisuke pushed back at him in vain.

"Ack! Get off, you fat bastard. My arm's still healing you know!"

"You're all right. Besides, who're you callin' fat, now? All this is a pure specimen of muscle—"

"Yeah? What do you call that flabby bit, there?"

"Ha! Nice try, Heisuke-chan, ain't no flab on this fantastic body."

"H-Hey! Who the hell're you callin' –chan?"

Harada chuckled as Saito sighed heavily.

"Hijikata-san will not be pleased," the latter stated. For the third time that night. Souji rolled his eyes.

"Don't worry, Hajime-kun. We'll have him back at a reasonable time."

Saito fixed him with his keen gaze that suggested Souji knew better. "That is not the issue."

"It's just a little celebration, nothing too crazy," Harada grinned. Souji hummed in agreement, but he couldn't say he was really paying attention to the conversations happening around him. It wasn't that he didn't care about why they were there, or didn't usually enjoy their company, but he was just a touch…distracted.

Their geisha for the night returned with fresh sake and even more food—really, who was paying for all this, because it certainly wasn't him—and she came to refill his cup. He moved it out of her reach before she could.

"I'm good for now," he said.

"Yes, Okita-han."

Without faltering, she smoothly bowed and stood, moving on to Saito. Souji spotted a flash of something out of the corner of his eye, next to his half-eaten food.

"What's the matter, not drinking tonight?" Harada asked. Souji knew it would seem odd to him, since they hadn't been out like this for a few weeks now.

"I'm not really feeling it, to be honest. I might get some air." He was aware that both Harada and Saito were watching him as he set down his sake cup, but he used the movement to grab the small object left next to his plate and hide it in his sleeve as he stood.

Harada's golden eyes were sharp as ever as he smiled, somewhat slyly.

"Have an appointment to get to or something?"

Souji didn't allow himself to hesitate. He looked back at Harada with the most convincing mild confusion he could muster.

"What kind of appointment would that be, Sano-san?"

Harada didn't have an answer for him, but Souji was irritated enough by his smile that he didn't care to hear it anyway.

Souji closed the shoji door behind him and made his way down the hall until he found the one he was looking for.

She sat waiting for him there, with a tray of sake already prepared. Her head raised when she heard the door slide open, and the way her face brightened with her smile actually coiled a bit of warmth in his chest.

He disguised the feeling with a smirk as he came in and sat down across from her, the sake between them. He let the paper sakura blossom fall out of his sleeve and onto the tray.

"Chizuru-chan," he greeted. She knew better than to be too formal with him, or use that silly accent geisha typically spoke to hide their origins. Chizuru was an Edo woman, through and through.

Folding her hands in her lap, she bowed her head only a little, but no less gracefully when she was able to look up at him again with that gentle smile of hers. It couldn't hide the happy sparkle in her brown eyes.

"Good evening, Okita-san," she said softly. She began by reaching out for the tokkuri flask and poured his sake into a saucer. Sake wasn't what he was craving, but he took a sip anyway, his sharp, molten eyes never leaving hers over the rim of the dish until she finally started to blush under the heat of his scrutiny. Her fingers twitched in her lap.

His smirk deepened. Even with all her training, all the years she'd spent in this place, she still couldn't hide her thoughts worth a damn. At least not with him.

"You're sitting awfully far, Chizuru-chan," he commented idly. "Are you trying to hurt my feelings?"

Her eyes widened, but before she could protest, Souji moved the tray aside and leaned forward until his cheek nearly touched hers. He braced himself with his free hand on the floor by her knees while his lips brushed her ear.

"Or are you still afraid of me?" he asked.

Chizuru shivered at the pleasant timbre of his voice in her ear, but she only moved back enough to meet his eyes when she gave him a small smile. She set the tokkuri flask back on the tray and raised a hand to shyly touch his cheek. It was his turn to be surprised.

"N-No," she said, shaking her head slightly. "I'm not."

Souji's smile then was softer than before, but still sly. He left the rest of his sake on the tray and held her hand to his cheek for a moment. He turned his head to press his lips into her palm. Her blush spread down to her neck as he continued down the length of her wrist, all the while holding her gaze. Her breath trembled a little, and his mouth curved up at the corners against her skin.

"Okita-san—"

His lips silenced hers, taking any complaint she might've had at his teasing. She sighed into him, her body relaxing against his when he brought her closer by the waist. He cradled her cheek, internally frowning when he swept away a stray tear he felt on his thumb. She had definitely been worried.

Her small hands gripped his kimono as he deepened the kiss. He briefly pulled away, just to press another lingering kiss to her lips.

"Sorry. I know it's been a while," Souji said eventually. He couldn't remember the last time he'd apologized, for anything.

Chizuru shook her head and wiped at her face, careful of her makeup. Her smile returned, this time with that somewhat dreamy look that always managed to amuse him.

"You must be so busy," she said. And then her smile dropped, her brows furrowed with thinly veiled concern. Souji noticed how her hands tightened on his sleeves.

"I…I heard about the incident at Aburano Koji. A-Are you…is everyone—"

She squeaked as Souji abruptly settled her more comfortably onto his lap, mindful of the annoyingly long pins in her hair that almost poked him in the eye. He should've known she would hear about that sooner rather than later.

Maybe he shouldn't have waited so long to come see her again, but Heisuke's return to the Shinsengumi had been a rocky one; he still wasn't completely recovered from his injuries, and Hijikata had been even more irritating than usual about "getting things back on track." Souji didn't think he could escape the man's hawk-like scrutiny if he tried to leave headquarters for leisure by himself without a reasonable excuse.

Well, reasonable for Hiji-baka, anyway.

He was just lucky that Shinpachi and Harada had devised this plan to sneak Heisuke out of the compound for a night.

"Yare, yare," Souji grinned down at her. "You worry too much."

Chizuru gave a rare pout. It only deepened when he laughed, but her eyes said she was happy to see him so amused. He tipped her chin up to him with two fingers, brushing her lower lip with his thumb.

"I'm here in one piece, aren't I?" he pointed out. "Does that face mean you think I'm not good enough as a warrior, Chi-zu-ru-chan?"

Her expression almost made him laugh again.

"Of-of course not, Okita-san!"

He would never get tired of her reactions to his teasing. Maybe that was why he couldn't help but be drawn to her, in the beginning. She was amusing, but more than anything, she was honest to a fault—a rare flicker of innocence in these violent, bloody times. That kind of quality was a liability, to be sure.

Souji didn't often like liabilities.

It also wasn't a particularly good quality for a geisha.

He smirked. "Hmm~? Of course, you don't think I'm an excellent swordsman?"

She knew he was teasing her. Her angry blush was evidence enough, but it was her visibly trying to figure out how to turn the tables on him without possibly offending him that was too much fun.

Chizuru released her grip on his clothing and held his hand in both of hers. Her lips curved into another smile as they lightly kissed his knuckles.

"I know…these hands are very strong, Okita-san," she said.

In the end, of course she'd gone with sincerity. It wasn't often that Souji was at a loss for words, but somehow she'd managed it. He stared back at her. Those large eyes of hers were amber in the dim lamplight, shaded with red in the corners that matched the color of her lips. Suddenly he wanted to know what she looked like without that makeup, or her hair in all those complicated knots and pins.

Tucked in a faraway corner of his mind, where he kept his most impossible, and admittedly mostly incomplete thoughts, a more complete picture was starting to take route there. Souji wanted to know what she looked like first thing in the morning, those eyes sliding open, with that first smile of her day being only for him.

He knew that kind of thinking was dangerous for a man like him. He was Kondou's sword, a tool for the Shinsengumi to move forward and nothing more. But…

"Ne, Chizuru-chan?"

"Y-Yes?"

He eyed the discarded tray of sake, all too easily imagining a much brighter setting; one where they weren't hiding from the rest of the world in a room where privacy was just an illusion and their time together wasn't bought and paid for.

"Can you make tea?"

"Eh?" She looked up at him in confusion. "Now?"

Souji held her tighter, stopping her from leaving his lap and the warmth of his embrace. He smirked at her.

"No, not now. I just want to know if you're capable of doing it."

She was still confused, giving him an odd look that now even seemed slightly offended. True, she had prepared his sake, so it stood to reason that she could make something as simple as tea. Still, he thought it was a valid question.

"Ah…yes, I can make tea."

"I guess that means you cook for yourself too."

"Of course," she said. Suspicion crept into her gaze as she frowned. She had to be wondering what he was on about.

"Would you cook for me?" he hedged. "Anything I wanted? I have a feeling you would spoil me."

Chizuru's eyes widened as her suspicion began to fall away at what he was implying. She looked away from him with a real frown, putting a damper on his good mood.

"Please don't tease me, Okita-san," she murmured. His fingers gripped her chin again, but she still didn't look at him.

"What do you mean?" Souji asked. But he knew full well what she was thinking. He just wanted her to be bold enough to say what she meant, and look him in the eyes when she did.

"You know very well that I…I…"

Souji frowned at the tears he saw welling up. It didn't matter.

Never had she ever said outright what she wanted, and tonight, he was determined to hear her say it.

But what then? a more logical thought hit him. What will you do about it?

He ignored that for the moment and gently shook her chin.

"What?" he pressed.

"I'm not a free woman," she said at last. And I'm not actually yours.

She owed a debt to the Sumi for taking her in, for training her in the arts of a geisha. It wasn't unlike the debt he owed to Kondou-san, except his debt was more or less of the heart, and hers was weighed in gold.

Souji pulled her flush against him then, making her gasp into his mouth as he ravaged hers. She pressed into him desperately while her hands slid up the planes of his chest and over his shoulders. Her nails trailed up the back of his neck, dragging a small shudder and a groan out of him.

He bit her lip in retaliation and grinned when she yelped. Shortly after he soothed over it with his tongue and left her lips, burning a hot, wet path down her neck, behind her ear.

Chizuru sighed. Her fingers slid through the ends of his hair. They stopped at the knot tying up half of it at the back of his head.

"Your hair…must be long," she said, despite being distracted by his wandering mouth nibbling on her ear.

"Hmm~. You like my hair?"

"I've never seen it loose," she said. Souji smirked further into her neck. It would be all too easy, with the way she sat in his lap, to push forward until she was flat on her back onto the tatami mats. Not yet.

He chuckled. "Oh? Does that mean you want to ravish me?"

She made an incredulous sound, and he didn't have to see her to know her face was getting very hot.

He sighed dramatically and rested his forehead on her shoulder. He couldn't fault her for being flustered. His Chizuru was no oiran.

"All right then, do what you want."

Chizuru huffed her annoyance. But he felt her fingers tentatively return to the tie holding his hair in place. It took her a moment, and his mouth twitched when she began to struggle with it. She obviously didn't want to hurt him by tugging too hard.

"Um…if you could just lean back a moment," she said. His hands gripped her hips to stop her from leaning away from him.

"Nope," he smirked. "I'm sure you can figure out something so simple."

She made another little sound of annoyance, and actually tugged sharply enough to make him wince.

"Oh! I'm so sorry, Okita-san—"

"Haven't you got it yet? It shouldn't be all that hard."

Fortunately, Souji felt the tie come out before he had to let go of her to do it himself. He finally pulled back enough to watch, amused at her curiosity. His hair fell just a bit past his shoulders.

Chizuru reached out with one hand and tentatively brushed through his bangs first, then the rest of it with both hands. His eyes closed almost involuntarily at the feeling of her gentle fingers running through his hair, rubbing away the small ache in the back of his head where his hair was always tied up. Her thumbs brushed his cheeks, and his eyes opened in surprised when she leaned forward and pressed a tender kiss to his lips.

Souji gripped her small waist in his hands and closed what little space was left between them. He knew if he didn't leave soon, Shinpachi, Harada, and the others would get back to headquarters before him. If they caught him, he would have to explain where he'd been if he had actually left the Sumi. Harada already suspected enough.

"I'm the only one?" Souji said, practically a growl against her lips. Only I get to hold you like this.

It took Chizuru a moment to register what he said, and then understand what he meant. But when she did, she smiled and nodded.

"Yes, Okita-san," she said, quiet but firm.

Then, more hesitantly, "…Always."

He knew then that if he asked, she would stay with him. Not because it meant she would be a free woman, but because she was free to be with him.

Souji didn't know if he was ready for that, or if he even deserved it. Hell, he didn't even know if he could take her from this place.

He wasn't one to think about the future. Being the First Division Captain of the Shinsengumi hadn't really allowed him that luxury. His life belonged to Kondou, after all.

But maybe…