Back To His Future
Chapter 2
Helga
She was having a bad day, and nothing she tried could pull her out of it, so she did the only thing that's ever helped her in times like this. Running down the stairs, she grabs her house keys on the way out the door. She doesn't bother to bring her phone because this is something she needs to do on her own, and no words from anyone, not even Dr. Bliss, can help.
She power walks down the street, the setting sun casts the town in a surreal glow. The air is warm as it rushes past her, causing her long hair to trail behind her. After a few short minutes she reaches the fire escape and quietly makes her way to the rooftop of the boarding house. Reaching the top, she quickly scans the open space, making sure she is alone. Satisfied that no one is around, she steps onto the roof and walks over to the skylight that sits above Arnold's abandoned bed. As always, she's happy to find the skylight's window unlocked, but even if it wasn't, she knew how to slip the latch from the outside.
She opens the panel of glass just enough for her to slip inside, and carefully climbs down the steps that are cut into the inside wall, until she reaches the sanctuary of Arnold's bed. She takes a moment to walk around the quiet room, allowing only the hazy light from the setting sun to guide her. She walks over to where the computer sits on his desk, a framed picture of the two of them causes her heart to flutter. She picks it up, running a finger down the image of her beloved. She notices how the picture, along with everything else in the room, is free of dust, telling her that she is not the only one who finds peace here.
Placing the picture back onto the desk, she walks back to the bed, removing her shoes before sliding between the cool sheets. As her head hits the pillow she allows it to sink deep into the downy softness. Taking a deep breath in, her nostrils fill with his faded scent, causing the tension in her body to slowly dissipate. Closing her eyes, images of him fade in and out like a slideshow as she gets lost in the memory of happier days.
She brings her hand up to the necklace she is wearing, her fingers rubbing across the smooth surface of the small, carved heart that hangs from it. She had received it in the mail one day, along with a letter from Arnold. In the letter he told her how one of the natives in the village they were staying at was teaching him how to make carvings from the wood of some native trees, just as their ancestors have done for hundreds of years. This heart was his first piece, and he wanted her to have it as a symbol of his undying love. She treasured that small, unassuming trinket, wearing close to her own heart. As time went on, he would send her other pieces, each one getting more elaborate as his skills increased.
When she first started coming here it worried her, making her wonder if she was finally losing it, but she needed something, anything, to help her hold on until his return. It wasn't easy being strong, hiding her true emotions from those around her, but she made a promise to herself the day she got the news of his leaving that she, under no circumstances, would let anyone see her misery. She rolls onto her back now and looks up towards the very roof top where she told him to go and follow his dreams, and remembers it as if it were only yesterday.
Things had been going good for the two of them, they were together, and happier than either of them could remember being. Arnold had his parents back, as well as a beautiful girlfriend, and she, after years of longing, finally had the love of her life. Then one day she noticed a change come over him. He seemed distracted, as if there were something weighing heavy on his mind. With her being a smart, intuitive girl, it didn't take her long to figure out what it was. He was leaving her.
She started growing suspicious when she noticed a set of maps and three passports sitting on his kitchen table one afternoon, as she was headed to the refrigerator to snag her and Arnold a couple of Yahoo sodas. It was after that when the change in Arnold had begun. He became extra clingy, doing his best to fill every free moment with just the two of them. She could tell he was trying just a little too hard to please her, by doing things like laughing extra loudly at her jokes, or by increasing the amount of times he would tell her that he loved her.
When the time finally came, he took her up to his room where they could talk without being interrupted by his grandmother's silly antics, or one of his grandfather's corny jokes. Sitting her on his small couch, he nervously licked his lips as he tried to form the words that he knew would destroy her. With a deep breath and sorrow in his eyes, he says the words that she had been dreading. "My parents are moving back to San Lorenzo, and they're taking me with them."
With her suspicions confirmed, her gut reaction is to yell and scream, to tell him he isn't being fair and that he can't leave. But she knows better. She knows that all that will do is start the words flowing that, once said, could never be taken back. So instead she responds with silence. She looks him straight in the eye, and without a word she gets up and heads for the roof top.
She stands at the edge of the roof, waiting for him to join her. Once he is next to her she continues to gaze out across the city, and it takes all the power that is within her to say the words that will set him free. Her voice is low but firm when she finally speaks. "I understand."
She wished she didn't understand, but she did, and that's why she had to let him go. That's also why she stood silently at his side when he told the rest of the gang about his leaving. She could feel their eyes on her once he was done, all of their friends, watching her for a reaction that never came. Instead she just smiled and supported him on the outside, while on the inside she was slowly dying.
She kept up that façade all the way to the airport where they said their good-byes. Each one professing their undying love no matter how many miles separated them. She believed him when he promised her that it was only a temporary move, and that he would, one day, return to her. They promised to write to each other as time permitted, and write she did. At the end of every day she sat down and wrote to him, telling him of everything that happened no matter how small or trivial an event. She'd considered not sending the letters at first, thinking it better to just let the relationship slowly fade away, but her love for him was too strong to let that happen. She knew that if they were to have a future together then it was imperative that she keep that link between them, so she did it with letters. She would start each letter with "To My Dearest Arnold, My Soul, My Life", and ended them with an affectionate "Forever yours, Helga".
She did have to admit, though, that not having him around all the time had its good side too. With him gone she started concentrating on herself more, developing better social skills which, in turn, enabled her to grow closer to those around her. She became more likable and started being included and asked to join in as herself and not just as Arnold's girlfriend. She became not only a better version of herself, but also a better friend and mentor.
Despite all that, there were still times when the absence of him would become too much for her to handle and it would leave her desperate for his touch. It mostly happened when she'd have a bad day at school, or a particularly heated argument with her father. Those were the times when she'd long to feel his arms around her, to hear him whisper in her ear that everything was going to be okay. It was those times that led her to where she was now. In Arnold's bed, with her head sunk deep into his pillow where there was still a trace of his scent, and with his sheets wrapped tightly around her like a pair of loving arms. Was this the healthiest of ways to deal with her struggles? If you were to ask Dr. Bliss she'd probably say no, but it was what worked and that was good enough for Helga.
She brings her thoughts back to the present now, just in time to hear some footsteps at the bottom of the staircase that leads to Arnold's room. Realizing that she had overstayed her welcome, she jumps out of bed and hastily straightens out the covers. Grabbing her shoes, she scurries up the ladder and out the skylight window mere seconds before Arnold's grandmother enters the room. The old woman notices the wrinkled bed covers and gives a knowing smile as she tilts her gaze up to the roof top. Smoothing out the covers, she fluffs the pillow and hums as she pulls out a feather duster from the pocket of her dress. Walking over to the desk, she picks up the picture of Helga and Arnold and gives it a sympathetic look. She whispers as she puts the picture back down. "I miss him too, Eleanor."
xxxxx
Phoebe stands at Helga's dresser, admiring the various carvings that sit displayed on top of it. She picks up the figure of a parrot, amazed at how each feather is intricately carved down to the very last detail. She runs a finger from the top of its head, down to the tip of its long tail. She places it back with the others while talking to her friend. "I've not seen this one before, how long have you had it?"
Helga lays on top of her bed facing the ceiling. She repeatedly throws a worn baseball above her head, catching it as it comes back down. She gives her shoulders a small shrug. "Eh, it came about a month ago with his last letter."
"Well it sure is a beauty. By the way you have his carvings arranged in the order received, you can really see the progression in his skills. It's very impressive."
"Yeah, I guess he has become pretty good at it, but what do you expect? There's not a whole lot to do to keep busy when you're stuck as far out in the jungle as he is."
"Oh, on the contrary, Helga, I would think there'd be a whole plethora of things to do what with learning all you can about a whole, lost civilization."
"I guess." Helga says with disinterest. "If you're into that kind of stuff that is."
Phoebe walks over to her friend, sitting next to her on the bed. "What's wrong, Helga?"
Helga catches the baseball and turns to look at the only person besides Arnold that can read her like a book. "What makes you think something's wrong?"
Phoebe gives her glasses a small push back up the bridge of her nose before tentatively continuing. "Well, it's just …."
Helga gives her friend a frustrated scowl. "Just what, Phoebe? Spit it out."
"Well, Arnold will finally be back in Hillwood after three full years in the jungle. I kind of thought you'd be at least a little more excited. Aren't you anxious to see him?"
Helga sits up, pushing herself off the bed. She begins to pace the room, showing Phoebe that she's hit a nerve. "Of course I'm anxious to see him. I've waited three full years to see him."
Phoebe gives her a confused look. "Then what's the problem?"
Helga throws her hands into the air as she growls out a response. "There is no problem, criminy, why does there always have to be a problem?"
Knowing her friend and how she is, Phoebe presses on undeterred. "Because I know you, Helga, and I know when something is weighing heavy on your mind. Now you know you won't feel better until you get it out, so I'm asking again. What's the problem?"
Knowing when she's beat, and also knowing that Phoebe won't give up until she gets an answer that she is satisfied with, Helga gives in. She walks over and sits back down on her bed, turning herself to look out her window. She looks out at the blue sky and sighs. "The problem is, Phoebe, that I'm scared."
Phoebe moves in closer, placing a hand on Helga's shoulder. "Scared? Of what?"
"Of Arnold. He's seen things, Phoebe, experienced things that are so far removed from Hillwood I can't even imagine. He's gotten a taste of life on the outside. What if…..what if Hillwood's not enough for him anymore? What if I'M not enough for him anymore?"
Finally understanding the situation, Phoebe cups Helga's chin in her fingers, turning her friend towards her. "Helga, you know that's not the case. He's even said in his letters how much he misses Hillwood, and most of all, how much he misses YOU."
Helga gives a little huff. "Heh, so he says, but what if he's wrong? What if he's changed?"
"Of course he's changed, Helga. We've all changed over the past three years. You more so than any one of us put together. But just because the two of you are different than you were before he left, doesn't mean his love for you has changed. Tell me something, have your feelings for him changed?"
Helga's eyes grow wide and she is adamant when she speaks. "No! I still love him just as much as before he left. Probably more so."
Phoebe gives her friend a smile. "Well, then what makes you think his love for you has changed?"
"Well, I …."
"If you want to know what I think, well, I think it's just your old insecurities rearing their nasty heads up, causing you to doubt yourself and Arnold. I'm certain that you're going to find that Arnold is still madly in love with you."
"And if you're wrong?"
"Well, if I'm wrong – and I don't think I am – then you and I will cross that bridge when we come to it. But for now all you have to do is have some faith, in yourself and Arnold. Can you do that?"
A smile spreads across Helga's face as she throws her arms around her best friend. "Yeah, Pheebs, with you by my side, I know I can do that."
xxxxx
The last five days went by excruciatingly slow for Helga as she waited for the rest of the week to pass. She paces the sidewalk outside of her house now as she keeps watch for Grandpa Phil's green Packard. After what seems like days, she finally sees the car as it slowly rambles down the street. As Phil pulls up to the curb she runs to the car, flinging the rear door open before he's even come to a full stop. Slamming the door shut behind her, she buckles herself in and anxiously looks out the front windshield as she thanks Arnold's grandparents for picking her up.
Despite Phil's efforts to strike up a conversation, she sits quietly in the back seat and stares out her window. Gertie watches Helga's reflection through the side mirror that sits just outside her window. She smiles at the girl who she knows will someday be family and does what she can to calm her nerves. "This reminds me of before Phil and I were married."
With her attention caught, Helga turns to look at Gertie. "Yeah? How so?"
"Well, this was back during the war, and I was left to wait here in Hillwood while Phil went overseas. Oh, how I missed him. Do you remember that, Phil?"
Arnold's grandfather gives a little chuckle. "Hehehe, I sure do, Pookie. It wasn't easy leaving the prettiest girl in all of Hillwood."
"How did you survive it? Not being able to be with Mr. Shortman that is?"
"Oh, there were days where I didn't think I could go on I missed him so much. But then the day finally came when the war was over and all our men came returning home to their loved ones. I remember I was scared at first."
Helga raises one side of her eyebrow. "Scared? Of what?"
"I was scared that Phil wouldn't want to be with me anymore. I mean, after all he'd seen, and all the exotic places he'd been. I was worried that Hillwood would be too boring for him. That I would be too boring for him."
Helga looks at the old couple fully realizing that that wasn't the case. "But he did come back, and he did still love you."
Gertie gives Phil's leg an affectionate pat. "Yes, it all worked out. Seemed my worries were all for nothing because, you see, when two people are truly in love, it will take more than a little separation to come between them."
Helga relaxes a bit as she leans against the back of her seat. "Yeah, I think you're right."
They finish the ride to the airport in silence, each one lost in their own thoughts.
xxxxx
Helga's nerves get the best of her as they sit and await the arrival of Arnold's plane. Unable to take it anymore, she gets up, excusing herself, and goes to wander the terminal. She passes by the various gift shops and food stands, all the while keeping an ear out for Arnold's flight number to be announced. It's not until she's reached the far end of the terminal that she realizes just how far she's wandered. Looking at the time on her phone she sees that Arnold's plane has most likely already landed and she sprints back across the terminal. She had wanted to be the first person he saw as he came down the escalator, and she hopes she's not too late.
As she rounds the final corner, she curses herself when she is stopped by a crowd of people. By the time she reaches her destination Arnold's plane has disembarked and now the baggage area is filled with a mix of new arrivals and the loved ones that have come to meet them.
It takes her a moment to scan the crowd before she sees him. There is no mistaking that uniquely shaped head, nor the mass of unruly hair that sticks out from it. The first thing she notices as she makes her way to him is how much taller, and broader, he has become. She can see him searching for her as she fights her way through the crowd and she has to yell his name more than once to get his attention. Finally, after the third try, he hears her and turns towards the sound of her voice. Before he knows what hits him, she flings herself into his arms, plastering herself into his broad chest. She holds on for dear life, a sob escaping her when she feels his arms come around her. She buries her face into his chest, breathing in deeply and thinks to herself, "He's home."