Clary decided to give Jace until six that night to respond to her. It was plenty of time for him to see her message and call back. She just had to find a way to pass the time until then. While her body was absolutely exhausted, her mind wouldn't calm down enough for her to sleep.

She spent time switching through TV news channels and reading through news and gossip sites online. She couldn't find a single thing about CeeCee being found or Valentine being arrested anywhere. When she'd gone missing, it'd been a huge story. Why was there silence about her rescue?

Right before six, Clary called Jace once more. When she was sent to voicemail after the first ring, she sent him a quick text informing him that she was on her way over. She had no idea what she was going to say to him when she did show up, and she spent her drive over trying to plan it out. She wanted to yell and scream at him but figured that wasn't the best path to take. Yelling and fighting wouldn't get her anywhere.

As she pulled into the parking garage, she still was unsure about what to say. She knew that she was going to ask about CeeCee and tell him about the pregnancy. She just didn't know how to start either of those conversations.

She walked toward the elevator on shaking legs, anxiety and adrenaline running through her at the prospect of a confrontation. When she entered her code, she was met with a buzzing noise signaling that it was not an acceptable access code. Had he really locked her out of the apartment?

She repeatedly pressed the call button to the penthouse knowing they couldn't ignore the annoying ringing forever. It didn't take long for her to hear the sound of the elevator running and approaching the garage. She took a step back as the doors slid open to reveal a nervous looking Jordan.

He stepped out and stood in front of her. "You need to leave, Clary," he said, his eyes shifting around the garage.

She scoffed, crossing her arms over her chest. "Really? He's not even going to come down and talk to me? He's going to send you instead?"

He sighed, running a hand over his face. "You don't understand—"

"No, I don't understand!" she yelled, throwing her hands in the air. "And nobody is trying to help me understand. I'm left in the dark knowing nothing. Blackthorn stopped by this morning and told me about CeeCee. None of you could be bothered to, apparently."

"Clary, you really need to leave," he said again.

"If he wants me to leave, he can come down here and tell me himself," she stated, squaring her shoulders.

"Clary—"

"I can wait here all night, Jordan. And I will. I'm tired of the shit he's pulling. He can't just keep avoiding me."

With a sigh, he pulled out his phone and pressed a button before holding it to his ear. He turned his head away from her and spoke quietly into the receiver. He hung up only seconds later.

"He's on his way down," Jordan said, "but I really think you should just leave before then."

She narrowed her eyes at him. "You're being awfully ominous right now, Jordan. What the hell is going on?"

"It's just a high-stress situation, and I don't think he's in the best mindset right now."

"His 'mindset' is no excuse for—"

She stopped her sentence as the elevator arrived once again, and Jace stepped out. Clary was taken aback by his appearance. There were dark circles under his eyes, and his hair was even more of a mess than usual. There was a light stubble along his jaw, and his face somehow even looked a little thinner, which wasn't something she thought would be possible within less than a week.

"What are you doing here?" he asked, sounding exhausted.

She was pulled out of her internal appraisal of him and noticed that Jordan had stepped away to give them some semblance of privacy.

"What am I doing here? You have been avoiding and ignoring me for days, and all you have to say is 'what are you doing here'?"

He shrugged, his eyes trained over her shoulder and his stance dismissive.

When she realized he wasn't going to say anything, she kept going. "Blackthorn told me they found CeeCee. Why the fuck didn't anyone tell me? No phone call, no text. Absolutely nothing! Nothing Is all I have been getting from you after that fight. And if you're mad at me over what happened, I get it. But what I don't get and what I can't get over is nobody keeping me in the loop with CeeCee. That's a level of petty I didn't think you would ever go to, Jace Herondale."

"Are you done?" His tone was bored. She didn't respond, and he followed with, "You need to leave."

"No," she said, stamping her foot lightly. "I'm not leaving until you actually talk to me. And I want to see her. I want to see that she's okay. I—I need that."

He folded his arms, his eyes still not on her. "She needs to be with just family for now."

Her eyes widened and her stomach twisted. "Are you saying after everything, everything, that I'm not her family? How am I not considered her family, Jace? You-You promised me a future with you and her."

"People break promises, Clare."

The use of her nickname stabbed at her. It wasn't Miss Fray. It wasn't Clarissa. It wasn't even just Clary. Clare. But he wasn't using it in a tender way.

"Please leave," he said. "I don't want to have to have you escorted out."

He turned toward the silver doors of the elevator, and she panicked. They weren't done. They couldn't be done. There was so much more she had to say.

"I'm pregnant," she blurted out, cringing as soon as the words left her mouth. That was definitely not how she wanted to break the news.

She saw his shoulders tense, her words echoing through the garage. He didn't turn around, though. He didn't actually do anything. When the elevator doors slid open, he went through them without another word.

Clary stood there dumbfounded, staring as the doors closed on his back. Did he really just leave her like that? Without even a word? After she finally told him the news? She'd been worried about a big blow up, but she had not at all been prepared for no reaction at all.

She didn't understand how he could do that. The Jace she knew would never in a million years have just walked away. She didn't know why he was behaving the way he was. Was this the real him, and she just didn't know it? Or was Jordan right and there were just things she didn't understand? Either way, walking away like that was not acceptable.

With a frustrated scream, she tore the ring off her finger and thew it at the ground, the metal clinking against the cement as it bounced. Her car keys soon followed, also accompanied by a scream.

"What are you doing?" Jordan asked, suddenly standing next to her.

"I don't want it!" she yelled, a sob escaping from deep within her. "I don't want anything he's given me. I don't want anything he's touched. I don't want anything associated with him!" She ran her the backs of her hands over her cheeks, removing the tears.

"You should have left when I told you to," he said quietly.

"Now this is my fault?" she seethed. "I'm not the one being a complete fucking asshole! And don't think I'm not mad at you, too. You could have told me about CeeCee."

"Jace told us not to. I don't think he knew the detectives were going to inform you."

She shoved a hand through her, roughly pulling at the knots her hand got caught on. "This is so ridiculous," she muttered. "I'm done. I'm done with all of this right now. If Jace ever decides to pull his head out of his ass, he knows how to contact me." She wasn't going to keep chasing after him. She didn't have the energy to keep doing it. He now knew what he needed to, and the ball was in his court. "I need to go get ready for work."

"Aren't you going to grab your keys?"

She shook her head. "I told you I don't want anything that he's given me. I've got the subway. I'll be fine."

"Do you think that's such a good idea with everything that's happened?"

Jordan sounded uncharacteristically nervous as he said that, but she chose to ignore it.

"They've got Valentine. I'm sure it won't take them long to find his partner. I'll talk to you later. That is if Jace doesn't give you orders not to speak to me at all."

Clary didn't go to work like she told Jordan she would. She didn't even take the subway. She called a cab and went straight home, where she proceeded to call in sick to work, claiming she had some kind of stomach bug. Bat didn't question it and told her to go ahead and take the next few days off just to make sure she was completely better before returning to work.

As soon as she hung up the phone, she turned it off and let herself fully break down. She curled up on her bed, a gut wrenching sob tearing its way through her throat. She pressed her face against her pillow in an attempt to muffle the noise.

She couldn't believe him. He just walked away. She was pregnant with his child, and he didn't even react. He didn't even look at her. How could he do that to her? He'd fucked up in the past, but this went far beyond him just making a mistake. This was him being cruel.

What did his non-reaction even mean? If they didn't make it through whatever was going on between them, what was going to happen? Was she going to be completely on her own with their child, the only interaction between Jace and her being monthly child support payments? Were they going to try to co-parent? Or was he going to try to take full custody?

Her mind was spiraling, and she couldn't get the last scenario out of it. What if she went through everything—pregnancy, childbirth, etc—only for Jace to decide to take her child away from her? If he truly blamed her for what happened to CeeCee, then he could easily think she wouldn't be fit to be a mother. He'd have courts on his side—he had the money and resources to provide things she never could.

She hugged her knees tightly to her chest, trying to quell the anxiety tearing its way through her. She pressed her face harder into the pillow, the material quickly becoming soaked. Loud sobs continued to wrack through her body, but they eventually calmed down, and she eventually drifted off to sleep.

Her body ached the next morning from the position she had fallen asleep in, and there was a pounding in her head from all the crying. Walking into the bathroom, she cringed at the sight of herself in the mirror. Her face was splotchy, eyes rimmed red. She looked like complete and utter shit.

With a sigh, she turned the shower on, making sure the water was hot enough, and stripped out of her clothes. She stood under the spray for awhile, letting the water stream down her face. She took her time in the shower, the hot water working to ease the soreness in her muscles.

Once the water began to run cold, she got out and redressed. She glanced at her phone on the nightstand. It was still shut off, and she planned to leave it that way. She didn't think Jace was going to be reaching out any time soon, and she didn't want to deal with whatever other calls or messages she might receive.

She found herself back on the couch, eating a bowl of cereal and mindlessly flipping through channels. She'd pause on a news channel every now and again, wondering if any information about CeeCee had been leaked yet. There still seemed to be no coverage on her, though.

The next few days followed the same pattern. She wallowed around her apartment, usually planted on the couch and watching television. Every once and awhile she'd watch the news and gossip shows for a bit. Her appetite was non-existent, and she was forcing herself to eat because she wasn't the only one she was in charge of nurturing at that point.

She was halfway through an episode of The Price is Right on the fourth day when a loud knock came from her door. She stilled, a spoon of oatmeal a few inches away from her mouth. Her heart thudded in her chest, even though her mind was telling her not to get her hopes up. It wasn't going to be him at the door. She quickly set her spoon back in the bowl and placed both items on the coffee table before standing.

On shaky legs, she walked to the door. She took a deep breath before looking through the peep hole, her shoulders immediately sagging when she saw who was standing there. It definitely was not Jace.

There was another loud knock, and she let out a sigh before opening the door.

"Hey, Iz," she answered, trying to force some sort of peppiness into her voice.

"Don't Hey, Iz me," her friend hissed, pushing her way into the apartment. "I stopped by Pandemonium the other night, but Bat told me you called in sick. But you've just been completely MIA. I've tried calling you for days only to be sent straight to voicemail every time."

"My phone's off," Clary said quietly.

"Yeah, no shit Sherlock. I deduced that on my own. What the hell is going on? That's not like you." Her eyes scanned over the apartment. "And it's a mess in here." She glanced at Clary. "And you look like you haven't showered in a month." Her voice got softer, whatever anger she had initially felt toward Clary melting away into concern. "Are you okay?"

All it took was those three words to make Clary break down all over again. Tears welled in her eyes and she shook her head, a hand covering her mouth to stifle whatever sounds tried to escape. Izzy wrapped an arm around Clary's shoulders and walked her to sit back down on the couch.

"What's wrong, Clary?" she asked gently.

"I'm pregnant!" Clary cried out, burying her face in her hands.

Izzy was quiet for a moment, rubbing slow circles on Clary's back. "Okay. I can see how it's not ideal timing, but I thought that'd be something you would be happy about. You've always wanted kids."

"I'm pregnant and Jace won't talk to me and I can't see CeeCee and I'm all alone and he's going to take it from me and—" she continued to babble, her words becoming unintelligible as she began to cry harder.

"I'm going to need you to calm down and explain to me what the hell you mean," Izzy responded.

Clary took a few deep, calming breaths and got herself back under control. Clary explained that she hadn't listened to her friend's advice; she reached out to Jace first. She walked Izzy through her confrontation with Jace the other day and detailed the thoughts had been plaguing her since.

"He walked away? Without a word?" Izzy asked once Clary had finished.

Clary nodded, pressing the heels of her hands into her eyes. "He couldn't even look at me, Iz. What does that mean?"

She felt Izzy move and stand up. "It means I'm going to kill him. That fucking bastard."

Clary lowered her hands and looked up at her best friend. "Please don't get involved. I don't want things to get worse, and I don't trust Jace not to blow it out of proportion if you say something to him."

"I'm not just going to let him treat you like this, Clary! It's ridiculous. I don't know what the hell he's thinking, but maybe kicking his ass will kick some sense into him."

"Iz, I'm begging you not to do anything. Everything's already so messed up, and I don't want to add any fuel to the fire." Clary's voiced cracked part way through her statement, and she felt a stinging at the back of her eyes once more.

Izzy looked at her for a few seconds before responding. "Alright, I won't bring it up to him if you agree to stop this pity party bullshit. No more moping around. You are strong than this, Clary, and I know it. This isolating yourself and not taking care of yourself shit isn't going to fly, okay?"

Clary hesitated for too long, and Izzy spoke again.

"Let's be honest, Clary. You've been through worse than this, and you came out of it stronger than before. Life has dealt you some shitty cards, but that doesn't mean you should leave the table. So, you're going to get your ass up, clean up this apartment and yourself, and actually go do something with your day."

"But I—"

"No. You're not going to make any excuses. You're going to stop sulking around. You need to live a little, and now is the perfect time to do it because God knows once that baby comes you're going to be a little preoccupied."

Clary followed Izzy's instructions to a bare minimum. That day she had cleaned up her tiny apartment, showered, and actually cooked herself meals throughout the day. Over the past couple of days, she'd worked on getting out of the house, and not just for work.

She'd met Izzy for coffee one afternoon, mainly so she could prove she was taking care of herself and leaving her apartment. She'd also walked around a few baby stores in her free time. She was trying to focus on the good things in her life, and, while her and Jace's future was unsure, she knew that the life growing inside of her was something she needed to be putting her attention on. She had begun to show, just barely, like she had happened to eat too much at a meal. Once that tiny bump became apparent, it was suddenly very real to her that she was actually going to be a mother soon, and she felt the need to start preparing.

While she was leaving her house and not being a pitiful mess, she still wasn't "living a little," as Izzy had put it. That's why that night, as she was standing next to Sebastian's usual table in Pandemonium, she found herself accepting an invitation to a birthday party he was throwing himself that upcoming weekend.

"Really? You'll come?" he asked.

Clary shrugged, hugging her tray close to her chest. "Yeah. Why are you so surprised?"

"I don't know, Cherry. I thought it might take some convincing to get you to agree."

"A few weeks ago, probably. But I'm trying to live a little, you know?"

"That's what I like to hear," he said. He pulled his phone out of his pocket and handed it to her. "Here, put your number in so I can forward you all the information."

She cocked an eyebrow at him. "Are you just trying to get my number, Sebastian?" she asked, the corners of her mouth curving up slightly.

"I didn't think about that, but it would be the perfect ploy, wouldn't it?"

She handed the phone back to him, having added herself as a contact in it. "Now you have a plan to use in the future."

"I've never had an issue getting numbers, Cherry, but I'll keep it in mind."

"Glad to hear it," she said. "I've gotta get back to work, but I'll hear from you, yeah?"

She was proud of herself for mixing things up. After everything with Raphael had gone down, she'd never given herself the chance to just enjoy herself. While things weren't great, she was still in a better place than she had been back then. Izzy was right: she needed to stop moping around. She was better than that. Getting out of the apartment and accepting Sebastian's invitation were just the beginning.

Clary closed her laptop with a sigh, glancing at the papers strewn all over her table. They were listings for small houses and two bedroom apartments, and she had been online trying to figure out her finances. She had recently come to the conclusion that she might just need to get out of New York, at least out of the city. If things with Jace didn't get resolved, she was going to need a fresh start. It was a huge city, but it felt so small at the same time, and she didn't want to put so much effort into avoiding both Jace and Raphael.

She glanced at the clock and ran a hand over her face. If she didn't get a move on, she was going to be late to Sebastian's party. She took a short shower, making quick work of washing her body and hair. Knowing it would take to long for her hair to airdry, she committed the time to blow drying it before dressing.

Izzy had taken Clary shopping the minute she learned about her plans to go to Sebastian's party, insisting that she needed a brand-new outfit for it. Clary had tried to argue, saying she wasn't trying to impress anyone and therefore didn't need new clothes. Izzy didn't budge, though, going off about how looking good on the outside helped one feel good on the inside. Thus, Clary did end up with an entire new outfit for the night.

She wiggled her hips as she pulled up the new pair of dark jeans. She then pulled on a silky green tank. Izzy had picked it out, making sure it was fitting enough to show off her curves but loose enough to not to be tight on her abdomen. She slipped her feet into a pair of strappy black heels—also Izzy's picking. The last thing to do was swipe on some mascara and lipstick, and she was all good to go.

After hailing a cab, it didn't take that long before she pulled up outside of a country club. There were bouncers waiting at the doors, and she was escorted out to a patio by an usher after giving her name. The patio was tastefully decorated. Fairy lights and bulb-lit lanterns casted a soft glow over the entire area. Wooden tables were set up, their surfaces left bare of any tablecloths, and an open bar was set up in a corner. Dance music played over hidden speakers.

Sebastian found her right away, slinging an arm over her shoulders. "Cherry!" he yelled, clearly already well on his way to a good time. "You showed! Let's go get you a drink."

He pulled her over to the bar before she could protest. When the bartender gave her an expectant look, she stuttered her way through ordering just a Sprite.

"No alcohol?" Sebastian scoffed. "What are you? Pregnant?"

She couldn't compose herself fast enough, and Sebastian must have noticed whatever look crossed her face. His arm fell from her shoulders, and he gaped at her.

"No way! With Herondale?" His voice wasn't quiet.

"Shush!" She placed a hand over his mouth. "I'm not ready for everyone to know,"

"Well, isn't that an interesting little tidbit of information," a new voice said.

Clary froze, her hand falling from Sebastian's mouth.

"Raphael!" Sebastian was apparently going to be yelling everyone's name that night. "You're here!"

"Of course, man. Wouldn't miss your birthday. I'm especially glad that I came, now. Tonight is already off to an interesting start."

Clary still didn't turn around, instead staring at the bottles of alcohol lining the shelf behind the bartender. She couldn't believe she had been so stupid. She had been so focused on following Izzy's words, that she hadn't even thought to ask about who else had been invited. Was Jace going to show up next? She didn't think he would. He had CeeCee to take care, but at that point it wouldn't have really surprised her.

"Aren't you going to say hello, Clarissa?" Raphael taunted.

She straightened her shoulders and faced him. "Nice to see you as always," she forced out. "I'm gonna let you two catch up." She walked away before either of them could say a thing.

She took a drink of her Sprite, wishing it was something stronger. Part of her wanted to leave already, but she hadn't even been there for ten minutes yet. Another part of her didn't want Raphael to know he had any sort of control over her anymore. He shouldn't have any control over her. Her body wasn't on the same page as her mind, though, and she felt the familiar panic growing in her chest.

She buried the panic down as far as she could and set out to enjoy the evening. She spent some time walking around and mingling with other guests, mostly sticking to chatting with those she recognized from Pandemonium. She managed to do a good job at staying clear of Raphael for a while.

It was an hour or so later when Sebastian roped her into a conversation with himself and Raphael. Clary didn't want to be rude to Sebastian on his birthday, so she endured it. Plus, having him as a buffer there made it easier to deal with.

Sebastian was interrupted halfway through a sentence as a security guard approached and whispered something in his ear. Sebastian's body went rigid, and confusion crossed his features.

"I'll be right back," he said, moving to leave.

"What's going on?" Clary asked, hoping she could use whatever it was to also step away. She didn't want to be left alone with Raphael at all.

"I'm not sure, but the police are here for some reason. If you'll excuse me."

Clary watched him walk across the patio, her head cocked to the side. The cops? The part was relatively chill, and she had no idea why they would be there. She was about to follow the path that Sebastian took when an arm wrapped around her neck and her back was pulled against another body.

"Don't draw any attention," Raphael whispered into her ear.

She felt something hard poke into her right side, and she looked down to see a glint of silver. Her mouth went dry and a heavy weight settled in her stomach. Was he holding a gun against her? He started to pull her backwards.

"Raphael, what—"

She was cut off as someone else called out his name. Her eyes snapped in the direction of the noise, and she saw a uniformed officer, gun drawn, staring right at them. Other officers trailed behind him, their weapons also out.

The crowd on the patio gasped, people moving out of the way while trying to keep their eyes on all the drama. She felt Raphael's hand move, and the gun was pressed into the side of her stomach instead of the side of her back. The officers' gazes moved the newly exposed gun.

"Drop the weapon!" the one in the front shouted as he took a step forward.

Raphael moved back again, his arm tightening around Clary's neck. Between the absolute terror running through her veins and his arm, Clary was struggling to get enough air into her lungs.

"Nobody move another inch if you want her to make it out of this!" Raphael called back, taking another step backwards.

The officer's stilled, and Clary felt her fear grow even more. What if they moved again, and Raphael followed through on his threat? She could die, but that wasn't the scariest scenario. What if he pulled that trigger, but she made it? She knew her baby wouldn't make it, and she didn't know if she could go through that again.

There was motion behind the officers, and familiar mop of blonde hair appeared. Based on some of the officers' reactions, she had a feeling that Jace was not supposed to be standing there with them.

"Clary!" he cried out, pure panic in his voice as his eyes connected with hers.

What was going on? Why was he there?

"Stay right where you are, Herondale!" Raphael demanded.

Hearing the malice in Raphael's tone suddenly made it all click. It was Raphael. He was the other person that night. He was the one who restrained her while Valentine took CeeCee. He was the elusive partner. The revelation just led to more questions in her mind—the loudest one being why?

Her gaze was still locked with Jace's, and she noticed as his eyes flicked somewhere next to her back. Before she could even wonder what that meant, a rustling noise came from the bushes next to here. Raphael's arm pulled across her neck as his body was pushed away from hers. The clattering of his gun onto the concrete of the patio rang in her ears as she pitched forward, falling to her hands and knees and gasping for air.

Officers rushed past her, and she blocked out the commotion behind her as the apprehended Raphael. Another set of feet approached as Jace all but ran to her. She saw his hand reach out to her as he got near, and she immediately flinched away.

"Don't touch me," she ground out.

"Clary—"

"No." She shook her head, staying in her position on the ground. She was partially afraid to move, but she also didn't want to look at him. She should be happy that he was there, that he seemed to care, but she couldn't get past her anger. He had been ignoring her, even after she told him about her pregnancy. Why did he suddenly care now?

A set of booted feet entered her line of vision.

"Hey, buddy, I need to check her out," an unfamiliar voice said. She tilted her head up slightly to see a paramedic standing there, gesturing for Jace to get out of the way.

The paramedic helped her up and guided her out front to the back of an ambulance. She sat down, her feet dangling over the parking lot's asphalt. She took notice of reporters and news vans showing up. Police cars already lined the streets, their lights twirling. Party guests milled about, some getting into their cars and leaving, others hanging back to see if anything else exciting was going to unfold.

The paramedic took her vitals and began asking her questions that she knew were to test whether or not she had gone into shock. She didn't think she was in shock. She just felt numb, like whatever had just happened had not actually happened to her.

He moved on to asking her questions about her medical history and her current health status. Upon learning that she was pregnant, he said he wanted to take her in just to run a few tests. She readily agreed to that. Jace was lurking around close by, and she knew it would be too difficult for him to follow the ambulance with all the press and emergency vehicles around, and she wasn't ready to face him yet.

Clary took a cab home from the hospital, where she had been given a clean bill of physical health. A groan nearly escaped her as she noticed a figure sitting against the wall next to her door.

"What are you doing here, Jace," she asked, her voice monotone, as she stepped over his legs to get to her door. She tried to ignore how absolutely terrible he looked. The bags under his eyes could have rivaled hers and his usually sun kissed skin was pale.

He scrambled up off the floor. "We need to talk, Clare," he said.

She unlocked her door but didn't open it. "Not right now, Jace."

"Yes, right now. There are some things you need to know."

"I'm sure there are. But I'm exhausted and not in the mood for any sort of talk."

"It's important," he pressed.

She turned and shot an icy glare at him. "You have had plenty of time to talk to me, Jace. But you haven't. Instead, you chose to ignore me and avoid me. So while you might want to talk, whatever talking we do will happen on my terms."

"You don't understand, Clary."

"I'll tell you what I do understand. I understand that I told you I was pregnant, and you didn't even bat an eye. You didn't react at all. And I gave you time to process it. I gave you time to reach out. I gave you time to talk to me. And you didn't. It was nothing but silence from you. It's been a long and, let's be honest, traumatizing night. So excuse me for not dropping literally everything because you suddenly want to talk."

His jaw ticked as he stared at her for a few moments. "Will you be ready to talk tomorrow?" he finally asked.

She sighed, her hand tightening on her door handle. "I don't know, Jace. I just want to go to bed, okay?" She turned the handle and pushed her door open slightly.

"What do you want, Clare? What will make you talk to me sooner rather than later?" he asked, his eyes pleading.

Clary stared into his eyes, her face serious and tone conveying she meant business as she said, "I want to see CeeCee, and I want to see her before we even attempt a conversation."