I open my eyes terrified.

Blood. Pain. Eyes. Burn.

Blood. Wrists.

Mom. Kaa-san.

I'll never see her again...

I'm alone.

I couldn't save her — save them.

It was my fault. I killed her, I killed my mother.

I killed her by not paying attention. I killed her by not being enough.

I am nothing.

I cry harder than I thought possible and without realizing where I was I fell asleep.

I woke up again with my eyes sore and my head pounding. I blinked repeatedly, trying to make my vision works. After a few seconds the world becomes clear and I notest that I didn't recognized.

— Where on earth am I? — I wonder aloud.

— In my house's guest room — answers a voice.

I turned around quickly and see a boy around my age (maybe a little bit younger) standing at the door. On his face there was a serious expression, that looked out of place in such a young face, even considering the fact that the boy was an Uchiha. By his side there was a slightly older boy with a way messier hair who seemed to be rather amused at the situation.

— And you are? — I ask, feeling my headache getting worse. The amusement seems to grow in the older's eyes. The younger one remains calm and unreadable.

— Uchiha Itachi.

His name sounded… familiar? Not that unusual. Yuki mentioned him? He should be one of my…

Oh god.

— The Clan Heir — the words slip my mouth. I feel more shocked than I should. I mean, by the way I heard girls talking about him I expected someone older. Or cooler. The boy not knowing what I was thinking simply agrees.

— I thought you were older. My cousins never shut up talking about you so I expected someone more impressive — I remark and silence follows this words.

I mean, he was cute, but he looked like a girl.

I open my mouth to say something when the older one starts to laugh like a madman. Itachi opens a small (really small) smile.

I feel my cheeks getting warmer.

I can't believe I just said that.

Stupid, stupid, stupid!

— I…

Before I can say anything else the older boy recovers from his fit. Before I could even blink the boy is already in front of me, his hand almost in my face.

— My name is Uchiha Shisui — The boy states with a sincere smile in his face — It's a true honor to meet a sane girl for once.

I feel my cheeks still burning bit ignore them. A feel a small smile opening and slowly I reach his hand.

— I'm Uchiha Izumi. It's my pleasure?

My answer sounds more like a question. Great. Shisui's smile grows even more and I feel like smiling with him. Itachi walks closer inside and than the older one gets serious.

— You are here since yesterday afternoon. We found you… at your house in the end of the day. When we entered the room we saw that something happened with your eyes but you passed out in a few seconds so we couldn't be sure.

I bit my lips remembering. I try hard to push the thoughts away again but it hurts.

" —Kaa-san. I promise I will protect you and my little sibling"

What would I do? There was no one else to protect. I was alone.

I try harder. Uchiha should not be seen crying, I knew that. Suppress your feelings, don't let them show. But it hurts.

It hurts too much.

I take deep breaths and suddenly there's a hand in my shoulder. I look up and stare into the older kid's eye.

— My parents died during the war, y'know. I love them very much and miss them everyday. But I'm alive — I keep staring at him, not understanding fully what he means — What I mean is… you'll survive Izumi. You have to live, it's what your parents would have wanted. I know it hurts but It'll get better. But for now… it's okay to cry.

— Why are you telling me this?

Shisui blinks and then look at me like I am stupid.

— They died when I was around age. I understand it, you know? At least partially. I guess I didn't want you to be alone? We are family, right?

Family.

That's right, isn't it? The Clan is not some kind of institution, or a ninja garden. Maybe…

Itachi comes closer, lips pressed down in a line. He seems like he wants to say something, but before he can a voice interrupts him:

— Itachi? Shisui-kun? Why are you two taking so long?

The door is opened and an incredibly pretty woman stares at us. Her eyes lock on me and she smiles gently. I freeze.

She must be Itachi's mother — the resemblance is too big even with the gender difference to be anything else — and I feel more nervous by the second. I don't even know her name and she is the Clan Matriarch! Her husband (Fugaku-sama) it's well-known in the clan and her wife was too. But simply couldn't remember her name!

Almost as reading my mind, the woman says:

— Hello, dear. I am Mikoto, Itachi's mother. You must be hungry! Lunch is almost ready.

I opened my mouth, trying to be polite and decline but my belly hurts.

— I'm a little bit hungry, Mikoto-sama, but there's…

— There's no need to such a formality, dear. Call me Mikoto baa-chan, please. And please don't get stressed over something as simple as lunch. I already made the food counting with you.

I smile at her feeling calmer.

— Thank you, Mikoto-sa… baa-chan.

She smiles again, kindly. And for a few seconds, I see my own mother in that warm and tender eyes. And then crushing guilt falls upon me — how could I think that? She was my mother, I killed her and now I replace her for some unknown woman? — and before I can do anything tears stream down my face.

I feel strong arms hugging me.

— It's fine Izumi-chan. You're fine. Your parents love you very much. They passed away but you are here. And you are not alone. You have a big family waiting to welcome you.

Did I? The main house was related to me, but were they family? Could they be?

— Even if you don't know us, we are blood. Itachi, Shisui, me, Fugaku, the clan as a hole. You are not alone and never will be.

I cry harder and at the same time smile more. I let Mikoto's kindness fulfill me, and watch as Itachi and Shisui stare at us.

They weren't family yet but a small (big) part of me wanted them to be. I wanted that feeling of safety again.

What would my mother think? Would she approve? What should I do?

In that minute I didn't think about any of that. I just enjoyed it — the warmth. I drown myself in it, hoping it would stick with me.

After cleaning my face and hands I follow Itachi to the dining room. The table is already set and the food is just waiting for us.

It smelled delicious.

I sit between Itachi and Shisui, in front of Mikoto-baa. The air is uncomfortable after the emotional scene I caused earlier.

— Itadakimasu — we all say and dig in.

When the first piece of the meal touches my tongue I can almost feel the tears of joy coming out.

— Kami! — I let the word slip.

— What did you say? — questions the older boy the usual amusement clear in his eyes.

I take a deep breath. It's the perfect chance to dissipate the awkwardness.

— That this food must have been made to kami-sama because I have never known something on earth could be this good.

Mikoto-baa laughs gracefully.

— There's no need to sweet-talk me Izu-chan.

— I don't think that's what she is doing, Kaa-san — Itachi says with an unusual gleam in his eyes.

I take a deep breath and ready myself. I put down the hashi slowly and master the most serious face I possibly could, and then straight up my back and stare inside Mikoto's eyes.

— Baa-san. Are you Kami-sama's cook?

Shisui laughs maniacally and Mikoto accompanies him, in a more normal manner. The big surprise, however, is Itachi who actually laugh. Not a small smile — an actual laugh.

In the few hours, I had known the boy I had already realized he was a serious person. Seeing him laughs almost openly makes me strangely proud of myself.

Happy for achieving my goal, and take the hashi and resume eating happily.

The meal goes on with a more relaxed note. Small talk happens here and there, and I don't pay much attention to what is being said.

— Izu-chan, Shi…

Mikoto is interrupted by the sound of the door opening and a male's voice that says 'tadaima'. Everyone is quiet when the room's door is opened and a man with a stern expression enters.

—Okaeri, Anata

— Okaeri, Otou-san

— Okaeri, Fugaku-sama.

The three speak at the same time, while I stay quiet. After a few seconds, I stand up and bow deeply in front of the Clan Head.

— I am honored to meet you, Fugaku-sama.

I slowly rise.

— It's my pleasure, Izumi-san — Answers the adult with a polite nod — Please seat down and finish your meal. After that, I have a few topics to discuss with you. Itachi will take you to my office.

— Hai, Fugaku-sama.

He leaves the room and I return to eat. After a few more minutes, everyone has finished eating and taking the plates to the sink. I am about to start washing them when Mikoto stops me:

— Itachi will take you now, dear. Don't worry, Shisui will help me wash the dishes.

I smile and nod. My heart starts beating faster — Fugaku-sama was too important to be something small. What would he want to discuss?

Itachi nods his head and asks me to follow him. I bite my lips, trying to calm down, while following his footsteps. Soon enough we are standing in front of a door. I am about to knock when Itachi stops me by holding my arm, making me look at him.

— You are too tense, Izumi-san. Breath.

I blink and grin a little bit. Even this expressionless boy can see that I'm a mess. I take a deep breath and feel myself relax.

— Otou-sama can be a… strict person, but he loves the clan deeply. You don't have to fear him — says the boy with his usual serious face.

— Thank you, Itachi-san.

The male stares at me for a few seconds, evaluating me. Apparently satisfied, he let my arm go. I knock the door and turn to thank Itachi again but he is already gone.

Fugaku tells me to enter and I do so. I slowly close the door behind me, trying to act as polite as possible. I should have paid more attention to my mother's lessons. She tried to drill every single social norm there was — Why didn't I pay attention? They would be so fucking useful right now. The sadness threatens to invade me and I feel like crying again.

Don't let them see.

I pushed the sadness back.

— Izumi-san, please, sit down — I obey — I am very sorry to bring such complicated matters so soon after your lost. But the Clan Elders and I need this to be sorted out as soon as possible.

— I understand, Fugaku-sama.

— First, I'll let you know that you are more than welcomed to stay here for a few weeks. You father was a friend and his lost, just like your mother's, it's deeply felt by all the clan. Now I must ask: what would you like to do in the next years? I know you are on taijutsu lessons and intended to frequent the Academy. Do you still wish to pursue the shinobi path?

I feel my heart rate quicken again (That had happened to many times on just one day).

I wanted to be a kunoichi because of my parents. To make them proud, follow their steps, protect them as they had protected me. Would I still follow this path?

If I did, would it have meaning?

Fugaku seams to realize my hesitation and arches one of his eyebrows.

— If you decide to enter the Academy, you will gain your own apartment, in the same complex Shisui lives. You'll get a fund to help with any expenses you may have. If you want to be a civilian, there's an orphanage inside the compound — He stops, and considers something before adding — I'm sure you notest but your eyes…

— I have awoken the Sharingan. I know. Even so… I haven't decided yet, what to do with my future.

I stop not knowing what else to say. The idea of being ninja filled me with pain: it reminded me of the people I had just lost, of my weakness, my guilt.

— I will let you take your leave now. No matter what you choose, your eyes will be trained. But Izumi-san… these eyes give you responsibility: to the clan, to the village, to your family. The shinobi way is in blood and waste so much potential would be very sad.

I press my lips. His voice makes it clear as water: I don't have a choice. If I refuse the clan will push and sooner later I would be forced to be a shinobi. I wanted to cry and scream, to cause a scene, but I knew I couldn't: Uchiha didn't act like spoiled babies. I always knew that.

— If you'll excuse me, Fugaku-sama — I say, already standing. I make a small bow, he nods and I leave the room.

Closing the door behind me I start to hurry through the house, searching for the exit. I needed to think. I pass the kitchen almost running: I can hear Mikoto calling me, but I ignore her. I couldn't stay there. I run the entirety of the Uchiha District and leave the gates ignoring every single call. I run and cry, and run more, stumbling and bumping into people. Some get angry and scream, some seem troubled and some look worried, and I keep pretending to not see anything — I wanted to be alone (I wanted my family), I wanted to think (I just wanted to relax), I wanted to stop feeling ( I wanted to feel safe again).

I bump into another person, but before I could leave I feel an arm holding me. It didn't put enough strength to harm me but enough to not let me keep going. There isn't anger, only kindness. I can't see the face: the tears wouldn't let me. The stranger wipes away my tears, and I close my eyes. Finally, I muster the courage to look at him.

A smile as warm and kind as the sun itself, hair as blond as gold, eyes as blue as the sky, that at the moment showed concern. The stranger was handsome. He looked kind, he screamed warmth. I think about running again but the man's voice stops me:

— What is a little girl doing running around all alone? Your parents must be worried sick.

The scolding is crystal clear in his tone. His words make me angry: how dare he judge me? He doesn't even know what's happening!

— They can't be because they are dead — I practically scream at his face, trying again to make him free me.

— That doesn't mean they aren't worried, Uchiha-chan — The man says

For a second I stop. How did he know…? I than remember the Uchiha fan stitched at my clothes and allow myself to relax a little bit.

— Minato! — a woman's voice screams somewhere to the right — What do you think you are doing with this little girl'ttebane?

Her tone gets lower, conveying her anger. When I finally see her I ger shocked. She is gorgeous — Mikoto's level of beauty and yet entirely different. Her red hair glows and her features look designed. Her violet eyes convey a storm of emotions and everything in her screams life, happiness.

I see the stranger (Minato, I suppose?) Bite his lips, looking almost scared.

— Kushina!

AUTOR'S NOTE:

Hello everyone! I hope you enjoyed it! Things will start to happen now.

What are your thoughts about Izumi? I know she is serious and I will try my best to explain in the next few chapters, but for now, keep it in mind that she grew in a very strict clan, in a shinobi family and in war-time.

Please share your opinions!