I fell so hard I can never go back on it.

I don't want to go back.

I'd hate it so much to go back.

I want you only for forever.

I love you so much it hurts.

Love me back and on my heart, I won't disappoint you.

Every step you take I will forever be there with you even when I am away.

If you don't feel the same about me, just know love is my only struggle and I didn't mean to fall for you.

You make me afraid to lose you and I wake up sweating.

I love you more than even I know..even more than I could possibly process in my mind.

You play around in my imagination when you're away.

I didn't want to go away I wanted to stay running beside you, but before I knew it I tripped and fell.

I don't have the strength.

I can't get up off of this love, I'm eternally damaged...It's all your fault. For you I love

Erza walked around with Jellal guiding her every step of the way, she only had a tiny belly so tiny it was unnoticeable when she was fully clothed but Jellal followed her intent to help her in any situation, so much so that he took over the baking and cooking Natsu needed her help with and only allowed her to mingle in the living room packing the suitcase. Natsu gulped measuring everything carefully and weighing it exactly.

''Lucy is gonna be surprised!'' he smiled from ear to ear. ''You mean Lucy doesn't know about you cooking?'' Jellal questioned placing a tray of cookies into the oven. 'One cup of peanut butter, one cup of sugar, and one egg.' he heard Lucy explaining while he sat in a chair close by she was whisking the peanut butter cookie batter by hand but she was too weak do it, so he stood over her and helped her with her task. ''Really only three ingredients?'' ''Yep'' she said turning to look into his face her eyes filled to the brim with a compelling look, one she only used and always used with him.

One he didn't understand but loved to receive so much, a look that made him scratch the nape of his neck and avert his gaze or back away from the dangerous little lady.

love was in her eyes even she was angry if only he had known.

''Natsu whisk it until it's smooth.'' ''I forgot to preheat the oven.'' ''What temperature?'' he asked curiously tasting the batter. ''350 and I'll leave it in for six minutes.'' she turned around to see Natsu fondly tasting yet another one of her dishes. ''Natsu!'' she ran to save her cookie dough from the laughing Dragneel who loved every reaction she could possibly give him.

Jellal broke into his thoughts with a light Ahem! '''We gotta do this quickly we don't know when Lucy'll be back.'' Natsu began to grease another cookie sheet. ''Why are we making cookies by the way?'' ''I wanna help with the peanut chocolate Ice cream Lucy's gonna make for Erza and Levy,'' he replied stoked to be a part of her operations. ''Thank both of you for being so considerate of us.'' Jellal got teary eyed.

''Chill! are the pregnancy hormones getting to you too?'' Natsu heard Erza beginning to cry and Jellal joining her. ''Scary I hope that never happens to me!'' he started to comfort his friends first by handing Erza a glass of pomegranate and cherry juice and hugging Jellal bashfully as he didn't much like mushy things unless Lucy or Grandine was involved.

Natsu was marinating the chicken with a sniffing Jellal by his side chopping garlic, ''Let me chop the onions, I don't want you crying again.'' Natsu took the knife and slowly but surely diced the onions and poured it into his blue polka dotted 'marinate bowl' ''Why do you and Lucy have such cute knives?'' Jellal gestured to the handle being wielded by the teary pink headed boy. ''I don't have cute knives Lucy does.'' he cleared it up and took the purple and white striped knife and cutting board placing them both into the dishwasher with the cookie cutters and bowls.

''What are we making?'' Jellal questioned taking the flower shaped cookies out of the oven with bear paw cooking mittens. Natsu was wearing Lucy's red Parental advisory apron with small fire emojis covering it, he knew Lucy would get a kick out of it if she saw him wearing it. Thinking about that he sped his work up placing the cookies carefully on a drying rack he began putting together the meal.

Lucy ran to and fro in the hospital wearing her brand new lab coat over her pantsuit she was super excited to begin working at her father's hospital. After making many rounds around the pediatric ward she stepped inside to greet the children up to ages 21, the beds were lined up neatly and separated the men and women unlike in Fairy tail's unruly ward she loved so much.

''Hi guys!'' she smiled sheepishly at the room that had people older than she thought there would be, there were children and those were the ones who replied happily.

there were no other doctors present in the room when she came inside so she asked the patients. ''What is this ward called?'' ''It's just a ward.'' a teenage girl spoke up annoyed by every little thing on the planet. ''I am the new doctor who will be working with you all soon.'' ''Then how come you don't know what the ward is called?'' the same girl cornered.

Lucy continued her radiant smile unwavering at the sharp comments made by different patients while she was walking around the room.

''You look a little young to be a doctor, you must mean you're an intern?'' ''I am twenty years old and I am a pediatric surgeon.'' she was kind of ticked off as she started to look at the tags on patients beds. ''Some of us are older than you.''

''Don't doubt my ability, if it makes it better for you I have an eidetic memory.'' ''What's that?'' Lucy proceeded to explain to a young girl. ''Are you like a prodigy or something?'' the earlier teen asked. ''Yes I am,'' Lucy said proudly for the first time.

Lucy sighed audibly and walked around the hospital recounting the happiness on the patients faces when she said she didn't see anything in their diets preventing them from eating chocolate chip black bean brownies, she checked with the other doctors and nurses before presenting them with the brownies, all of them were happy even the rude teen who would probably never admit to that.

After she left the ward she was crowned ' Dr. Dad Jokes' by the patients not to her knowledge of course.

Natsu would love that as he always told her to stop with the 'dad' jokes, she never would and he secretly loved them.

she always laughed hard at dumb jokes or at least tried hard not to causing a crazy look to fester on her face, which made her hilarious to be around since she was happy most of the time.

People would stop and watch her laugh loudly while holding onto Natsu's arms for support like she had been shot and was choking on her laughter, it was quite a sight.

He would laugh with her and hold her upright not afraid to be seen with besides her laughter was overly contagious to him, passerby's' always thought he told the joke sometimes he did tell the jokes but other times she was trying to tell him something in her laughing language that only he understood, something she randomly remembered and felt she should bring up no matter how old it was.

At the moment she was missing Natsu so she looked through her mind splashing around in the warm waters of her memories, she picked a small piece and giggled all the way back to Jude's office.

What she was picturing was when the duo was 14 Natsu came running into her 'forbidden' room to tell her to hurry up and he slipped on air and fell on her freshly ironed school uniform that lay out on her bed. ''That's what happens when you enter my room without my permission!''

She yelled holding on to the boy who was much shorter than her at the time laughing. ''It isn't funny!'' his cheeks flushed and he tried to leave the room slipping again and killing Lucy who howled with laughter and held her sides to his further embarrassment.

light accompanying her steps she fluttered into her father's office rays from the setting sun greeted her smile, ''Yes dear?'' he looked up and returned her wide smile. ''Do you want to come with me and Natsu on a trip soon?'' ''When is the trip?''

he asked taking off his reading glasses and ruffling his hair. ''Whenever we have a day off.'' ''Hmm..'' he was thinking about it when Crawford spoke up and said. ''How about next weekend? because we still have things to do this weekend.'' ''I'll tell Natsu.'' she said skipping back into the hall.

Lucy swung by the gift shop and bought a variety of vegetable seed packets that she decided she would be planting in the springtime.

she only bought it because she felt rude after making a long conservation with the cashier Ruth.

Lucy stuck her prizes into her coat pocket and checked her text delighted to see the phone chain Natsu gave her hanging from it.

the text was from Aquarius and she was pissed (as always) it was unrelated to the court session that were being dragged on for way too long already.

instead she was telling Lucy the berry ice cream she made for her was much too sweet, Lucy sighed and texted Natsu instead of replying which she knew would have Aquarius ticked off because she didn't reply.

''Hey Natsu.''

he replied a whole minute later.

''What?''

''Really Natsu! that long for such a short reply?''

''I was thinking of what I should say.''

''LOL why?''

he didn't reply so she started the conversation before he drained another minute of her time.

''What are you doing right now?''

he was not about to tell her he was cooking so he replied.

''Um..''

''Nothing why?''

''You obviously are doing something!''

Crap! he was panicking now much to Erza's amusement.

''You always tell me what you're doing even when it is something stupid.''

she texted at the speed of lightning.

''Hey I never do anything stupid.''

Lucy didn't text back for so long it became awkward so she just put:

''...''

''Luce!''

Lucy laughed out loud she was going to get him when she got home she could practically smell whatever he was cooking without permission because to her it was illegal.

''Can we go out next weekend?''

''We have to work until then.''

Lucy placed her phone in her coat wondering why he wouldn't text back.

Grabbing a bottle of water and going to stare at the sunset she waited until she was called upon to perform a series of surgeries that inevitably would keep her until 10:00 PM because they were short on staff as many doctors took time off for holidays.

she turned to run toward the prep room to take a look at the young patient she was assigned to, when she was stopped by Lisanna ''What are you doing here Li?!'' she asked surprised by the popup visit from her white haired friend. ''I wanted to see you and the new hospital setting, also I have a date in this area.'' she said excitedly placing blue orchids and a white gift bag in Lucy's hands.

Lucy's heart melted as she looked into Lisanna's clear blue eyes, she scanned the girl looking at the small flower bow tying her hair and the green dress covered in stars she was wearing, it was clear she going out. 'Was this why Natsu didn't tell what he was doing?' 'Was he going on a date with Lisanna?' thoughts ran through her mind.

A doctor walked through the automatic doors letting a gentle breeze that felt different to Lucy on the inside.

The breeze made her unblinking eyes smart and the hair on her neck raised, she felt hurt but she pushed it down. ''Hey Lu you there?'' Lisanna asked looking into her grave face puzzled ''Oh Li I gotta perform a surgery, thank you for coming to visit me!''

she hugged Lisanna's thin frame tightly pushing her hurt away. ''Make sure to eat well!'' she shouted breaking into a run only stopping to hand her things to Gildarts. ''Can you put this in my office for me? the flowers must go into the vase thanks!'' she ran at top speed to the prep room to meet the patient and prepare for surgery.

When she reached the six year old named Rouge she told him the tears in her eyes was sweat from running through the lobby all the way to him.

Rouge's naturally fierce red irises scanned her unfazed he knew she was lying and she knew he knew that.

she felt so fake for hugging Lisanna like that when she was actually hurt, she felt like an idiot for being so attached to Natsu forgetting that she would have to let him go someday.

she wiped her tears and started looking into Rouge's eyes with a flashlight and listening to his heart and sure enough the beat was off. ''I always have sharp pain and my heart flutters.'' ''But I'm really just afraid of the scalpel.''

Lucy's looked into the eyes of the intelligent six year old with nothing but kindness bubbling in her eyes, she pecked the top of his head and caressed his black locks. ''Don't worry darling you won't feel any pain.'' she placed her hand on her heart. ''I swear.'' she smiled reassuring him calmly. The other two doctors scoffed how could she be so sure she already this surgery under-wraps?

As expected the heart surgery was successful and scarring were minimized thanks to her exceptional stitching.

''Rouge what do you want for your birthday?'' his father asked filming the boy with a camcorder. ''I want a green kitten!'' he yelled still high on anesthesia.

''How are we gonna get that?!'' his mother giggled sitting by his side. ''it's possible I have a blue cat.'' Lucy showed the picture on her phone to the shocked family before she was called for another surgery this time for an infant.

Lucy made a mad dash her heart was gonna sink into the ocean and be swallowed by sharks wasn't it? she ran right over to the crying new mother hugging her promptly. ''It's going to be alright.'' she said looking right into her eyes and walking off to prep for surgery again.

''Natsu all of things you need are in the bag but are you going to take this?'' Erza asked making him blush when he looked in her direction. ''Of course not Lucy started that!'' Jellal laughed and then laughed some more at Natsu's Totoro pajamas.

''How could I even take that with me into potentially dangerous places?'' ''So you were planning on taking it!?'' the couple screamed with laughter in unison.

''No I wasn't! and I know Luce and I are troublemakers but you guys are way too loud.'' They didn't get any quieter and laughed their way out the door it was nine o'clock and they had eaten dinner with Natsu leaving enough food for both father and daughter to eat. ''Bye!'' he called closing the door after their car was gone.

Natsu tossed his tall body onto the couch craving sleep after dealing with Erza's mood swings drifting somewhere near sleep before being awoken by thoughts of Lucy behaving that way. 'Why am I thinking this way?' he dived back onto the couch thinking aloud.

'You don't even know if she likes you back like that.' he buried his face in a pillow what had she done to him, he wasn't originally so cute rather he had sharper edges as a young boy but always a soft spot for her, now she turned him into a foolish crybaby. ''Heartfilia.'' he said her last name thinking of getting revenge and not knowing of any possible way to do so.

A knock on the front door had him running to place the pajamas back in the spot Lucy couldn't find in the closet, just so she wouldn't make him wear it again he hid it under his boxes.

He opened the door and Jude pushed his way inside scrunching a Hi with his nose before going to put his new jacket down, Lucy followed after him greeting Natsu with halfheartedness unintentionally lacing her voice which he detected immediately. ''Rough day?'' he asked closing the door after her. ''No it was quite fine,'' she said placing her veggie seed packets on the counter smiling at him.

''You sure?'' he asked looking directly into her eyes she didn't avert her gaze afraid he might see through her if she did. ''Yep.'' she felt her throat start to burn and her head start to throb so she had a seat while Jude looked around the kitchen in search of something to cook quickly. ''I already cooked, your plate is in the microwave.'' he told Jude without changing his glance coming over to sit next Lucy who tried her best to remain calm. ''You're lying to me Lucy.'' he whispered holding her shoulders and pulling her towards him.

She let him hold her cause she didn't want to seem suspicious. ''Well, how about you?'' she asked smiling gently. ''Did you enjoy your date?'' she watched his puzzled expression that did not waver with her calm accusation. ''What date would I go on?''

he brushed her hair out of her face playing along with her weird game. ''I just did what you told me not to and cooked.'' ''You planning on asking me out or something?'' ''Then what should I wear for my first ever date?''

he giggled playing with her earlobes. ''Then you didn't go on a date with Lisanna?'' ''Why would I go on a date with Lisanna?!'' he asked touching her forehead to check her temperature. ''Lisanna has Bickslow and I am...married'' he scratched his neck flustered by his own words. ''I'm sorry you missed your chance with Lisanna.'' Lucy said feeling only a little bit better, Natsu looked at her like she just sprouted a tomato tree atop her head.

''I have never liked Lisanna like that! she has always been my friend.'' Lucy's eyes widened and she met his gaze making him look away, he was kind of upset she thought that way about him. Lucy felt the butterflies in her stomach begin to flutter again and tears spilled from her eyes. ''You are one strange little lady.'' he said wiping tears from her face. ''Did you eat lunch well? she nodded enthusiastically holding his wrists wanting to hug him. ''Now go eat dinner, it tastes delicious.'' she hugged him like bandages around a patient. ''You're that hungry? acting all crazy.'' '' well go on and eat.'' he returned her hug then let her go eat dinner.

He took a video of her asking Jude why he was eating out of the pot. Natsu laughed when Jude startled before continuing with his mission to eat every last thing. ''Nah!'' she yelled running to get a plate before Jude succeeded in cleaning the skillet out. Lucy ate content that Jude didn't hear her conversation and that he was busy eating.

Even though he didn't hear her he knew they weren't married so it didn't really matter if he did or not, he wasn't going to call her out.

After quickly whipping together condensed milk, heavy cream, and joining it together with the flower shaped cookies, Lucy's ice cream was done and placed into the freezer and again the Heartfilia-Dragneel house hold was lit up again with noise when she went back to her plate.

''Eat slowly Luce my goodness!'' he was recording her so she stuck out her tongue before coughing on chicken. ''What did I just say?'' Natsu couldn't believe it when the same thing happened to Jude. ''And I'm the greedy one.'' he laughed''You are.'' the older man confirmed for the delusional Dragneel while tasting the salad. ''After you guy's finish eating wanna sit outside? the night is breathtaking.'' ''Aye.'' Lucy raised her fork extremely happy, Natsu laughed she was too cute for his health.

Natsu wiped the bench near the only streetlight in Fairy Hill completely dry with an old towel then gestured for Lucy to sit down. ''I really need to pay attention to my flowers more.'' she said plucking a dried leaf from what was previously a red rose bush.

Jude came running down the stairs to join Lucy outside, he pushed Natsu but when he would budge from Lucy's side he sat on Natsu's other side slightly salty.

Natsu glanced at Jude quickly and was met with a sour face from the pale man he still wasn't going to moving though. Natsu watched his warm breath turn into clouds of smoke and fly towards the real heavy clouds before vanishing in a mist.

The dark trees stood above the trio in a circle tossing wind back and forth between shy leaves the gently rustled under the night's cold influence.

The sky was dotted with stars like a dark blue canvas that was madly blotted with shining ink of many colors, it was like they were looking beyond the sky and getting lost in the bliss simple things brought to them to see. Wind like cream whisked leaves and acorns across pavement making poetic scrapping sounds. The clouds hung their heads and tried to hold back snow that was threatening to spill from their woolly eyes. ''Hey make a wish aloud right now.''

Natsu suddenly broke the pleasing silence. ''You have to say it aloud.'' he was asking Lucy for her wish but Jude piped up. ''I wish I wasn't so cold.'' to which Natsu replied. ''Go back inside then.''

Lucy laughed loudly while the two men stared it out with poker faces. Natsu wrapped a warm arm around Jude and returned his attention to Lucy excited to hear her wish. ''I don't have any thing to wish for right now I am content.'' she stretched her hands toward the golden light and sighed ecstatic at her earlier findings. Natsu wasn't having that. ''Come on, make a wish.'' ''I feel like I need a hug, Can I have that?'' she turned to him smiling cheekily.

When time slows down it is marvelous, time slowed down for Lucy when Natsu pulled her close and wrapped her up like a present, she had to wink one eye because his cheek lay on hers as he hugged her for a little bit longer than usual.

Sitting outside for a while gazing at the lulling stars that sung a hidden lullaby Jude and Lucy fell asleep on Natsu's shoulder much to his lonely amusement.

Natsu breathed slowly hearing a instrument he used to play the violin in his ears, thinking about how much time he had left..not that much he had to wait basically two weeks to go on a three day trip with Jude and Lucy then he had promised to visit his family after that he had to go.

Breathing his frustrations into the icy night air he stood up quickly grabbing the two sleeping bodies before they could fall, transporting Jude into his bed first since he was elderly and frail before lifting Lucy up and hugging her all the way back to bed to place her under the comfy covers.

On nights like this he wished he didn't fall they way he did and hurt from his own feelings, On nights like this he had a empty feeling in his heart that ate away at its surroundings. Watching snow flakes fall from the sky for awhile before he closed the tired curtains and laid beside the love of his life.

''Another day has passed.'' he whispered to her before falling into sleep's embrace.

Beauty and all she was had blessed the breathtaking duo as they slipped on mounds of hardship they caused from not being honest to their hearts, until adulthood.

'How can I make you love me, Like I love you?' he thought in his sleep while she replied in her dreams. 'I love you more than you should ever know.'

~End of chapter~

I hope you enjoy this chapter of 'My Special Star' I did. :)

I have a new internet key (My father bought it for me,)

and I sincerely hope my little siblings don't destroy this one. {fingers crossed

Excuse my mistakes.