'I know what you need. A date.'

'Oh shut up Fleur' she muttered, choosing a seat in the corner. The man on the next table turned his head in her direction and she shut her mouth. She must stop replaying that woman's words in her head and replying out loud. Her date would think she was crazy.

Speaking of her date, she ran her eye over the scene but nobody stood out. Or rather, nobody she wanted to approach. There were some colleagues she'd rather avoid (why oh why where they there?). She couldn't bear it if it was Scary Sue from ITU. That wasn't the most charitable of thoughts but the woman was a bit of a nightmare. She was sure that white haired woman worked on the ED. It wasn't Elle, she was sitting with Jacob. She wouldn't have minded if it was Elle. She was nice. Or Rosa. But she was married to the tall dark nurse. Actually, what was she thinking? She was hoping her date wasn't from work. That would be awkward. Fleur had said she might know this woman, she might not. As the newest porter on the scene, she hadn't had much training in whom was whom yet.

She looked around for non-work people but saw no woman on her own. Certainly no one her age. She was starting to feel like Fleur had set her up on a wild goose chase. Look for the turquoise accessory. Very cryptic. With no knowledge of what accessory that would be; Bernie kept searching, hopefully without being too obvious, rustling around in her snack bag for sustenance.

Fifteen minutes later, Bernie was getting bored. There was only so much searching on the internet for home furnishings that she had patience for. IKEA on her day off would be the plan.

Ah, someone she did recognise. Sort of. The other woman approached her and asked if the other half of her table was free.

'Of course.'

She'd seen her around a lot, not sure where she worked but they'd talked while in the queue for coffee in Pulses several times. She thought she knew her name. She certainly knew her coffee order. Strong and hot, the way Bernie liked it too. But nothing about her said date. A bag spilling over with knitting wool ('I bet those are handy if you're walking down an alleyway' she joked and got a laugh back) and some work files were hardly accessories to bring to a date. They chatted on for a bit, finished their drinks and her companion took her leave. A shame. She quite liked her. And still her date didn't materialise.

A WhatsApp message later and Fleur rang.

'What do you mean she never turned up?' She shrilled.

'Well it doesn't look like it. I was joined by someone for a while so maybe she walked in and didn't find me on my own but I swear, I cannot find this turquoise thing you mentioned.'

'I'm coming over.'

No arguments when Fleur decided on something. She was a mini bulldozer. She was a strider. She marched right into the bar and plumped herself down.

'Well no wonder anyone can't find you, sitting in this corner.'

'It gives me the best view of the place.'

Fleur tutted, looked around. She couldn't argue with strategy.

'Who have you been sitting with? A wine drinker?'

'How did you know?' Asked Bernie, puzzled as to how Fleur concluded anything. The answer lay in the water marks on the table. Of course Fleur would notice a detail like that.

'What did she have?'

'Red wine.'

'Which one?'

'How do I know?' Bernie was getting irritated. She was no connoisseur of wines.

'Are you telling me you had a drink with Serena Campbell and not know what she drinks?'

'Who?' Bernie thought about it. 'Oh.'

She had heard the name but didn't know who it actually was. She explained this to Fleur who rolled her eyes and asked who she thought she'd been drinking with. Bernie wasn't sure.

'Erm, Connie Beauchamp?'

Fleur's eyebrows welded themselves to her fringe.

'Did you really?'

'Well, no, it was one of the names I'd heard walking around the hospital.'

Bernie looked sheepish.

'You'd better not hope for Connie. She's a terror. She doesn't do dates. She does short sharp shags. With men.'

Bernie would bear that in mind.

'I'll point her out next time and you'll be glad it wasn't her I had in mind. I wouldn't recommend her to anyone.'

'Well then I don't know who this mystery woman is then.'

Fleur scanned the room and brightened when the woman came in and made a beeline for their table.

'Hi, sorry to disturb you again but I left some wool behind. Oh hi Fleur.'

Neither Fleur or Bernie had realised that Fleur was half sitting on a piece of pink wool. She got up and apologised but kept staring at Serena the whole time. As soon as Serena had been waylaid at another table, she turned to Bernie and hissed 'Are you colour-blind?'

'What?' Bernie didn't see what the connection was. She looked at the piece of wool in Serena's hand.

'It's pink. Definitely pink' she insisted. 'Not turquoise.'

'No but that is.' Fleur nodded to the other colour in the bag. Bernie stared at it. 'That's…that's green.'

Fleur gave her the death stare.

'You're such a man.'

'What? It's clearly green!'

'It's turquoise, you infuriating creature and I can't believe you met your date without realising it was your date.'

'Well why didn't she come and look for her blind date then? She only came to find a space to drink and go.'

'I don't know.' Fleur looked puzzled. 'I'm sure I told her tonight.' She took out her phone and flicked through her messages. Tapped one out and sent it. Looked around. Serena had left. They waited until three dots had appeared, heralding the message 'next week, surely?'

'She thought it was next Thursday' said Fleur, slapping her head melodramatically. 'She wasn't even looking out for you and she still sat at your table. You nutters.'

'Well she's going home to continue knitting for her grand-niece. That's why she's carrying it around' explained Bernie.

'I know. That's why I told you to look out for the turquoise accessory. That was the colour she was knitting with this morning.'

Bernie slumped back with a groan. 'Seriously? You couldn't have given me more to go on?'

'I didn't want to make it too easy for you. I didn't realise you were colour challenged. Or that you weren't sure who anyone was in the hospital.'

Her mobile beeped with a message from Serena.

'Yes you idiot, your date was waiting for you tonight' Fleur muttered as she read her screen. 'She says she's coming back now. Putting the knitting on hold.'

Before long, Serena was back.

'I'm so sorry, I thought it was next week. I didn't realise it was you. I have seen you before, you're the new porter aren't you?'

'Well I'll leave you ladies to it.' Fleur was delighted that both of her blind dates were already at ease with each other, their smiles confirmed it. They didn't even notice when she gave Serena her seat, as they continued their conversation. She spied on them for a while, sniggering at their stupidity.

'She told me to look out for a turquoise accessory.'

They looked at Serena's bag.

'Well it is a bit vague but…'

'That is clearly green.'

Serena stared at her with a twitch hovering round her lips.

'This is turquoise.'

'Oh no, I can't have this conversation again.' Bernie harrumphed.

Serena laughed at her misfortune.

'So that's how you missed me.'

Bernie felt like an idiot.

'So what did Fleur tell you to look out for?'

Serena tried to remember the clue she was given.

'Milky buttons.' She looked around the table, at Bernie's bag.

'Oh, I ate them already.'

Fleur tutted. She'd forgotten about that. The damn woman had already eaten her clue. Useless gay. Still, they looked nicely ensconced in the corner together so her work here was done.

Fairy gaymother over and out.