Author's Note: Some of the next chapter is based on a suggestion made in the audio commentary of a Season 12 episode. I know that to this day, neither Seth nor the Family Guy crew have created that episode so far. Perhaps I can call him about that as well.

Chapter 4 - Chat with Bertram

Stewie had gone upstairs to his bedroom and set the coordinates on his time machine.

"All right, Rupert," Stewie addressed his teddy bear. "We're about ready to travel back to a moment where I never killed Bertram, so I can tell him about my condition. I've even set the correct coordinates as well."

As Stewie was about to go into the machine, Brian came in with a fanny pack. Stewie noticed this and sighed disgustedly.

"You don't need that fanny pack on, Brian," he said. "We're just going to have a chat with Bertram."

"Fine," Brian sighed, removing the fanny pack from his waist. "I was about to take some dog biscuits with me."

"Have you had your lunch?"

Pause.

"Yes," Brian answered.

"Then, let's go," Stewie replied. "We've not a moment to lose."

The two friends (and Rupert) got into the machine, which then activated.

Brian and Stewie appeared at the sidewalk of a block.

"Well, Brian, here we are," Stewie said. "Quahog from Season 7."

"Yeah," Brian replied. "This is when you guys temporarily replaced me with that new dog."

"Yes," Stewie noted, "but this is one of the moments before I killed him."

"And mutilated him," Brian added.

"Luckily," Stewie began, "I transported us somewhere where we don't encounter our past selves. We're only a few blocks away from Spooner Street."

Just then, Stewie noticed something very familiar in another block.

"Wait a minute," he said before running in that direction. Brian followed him.

Stewie stopped next to a fire hydrant where a similar-looking tan-colored male dog wearing a black collar had done his business.

"Excuse me," Stewie addressed the dog, "don't I know you?"

The dog turned around, revealed to be Vinny, from the three-episode "Life of Brian" arc, and noticed Stewie. He chuckled, the familiar Paulie Gualtieri voice.

"I don't know you," he shrugged, "but I'm very popular in the neighborhood. You might've seen me in South Pacific." He started singing. "We don't have the dames."

"I don't think so," Stewie replied. "But can you tell us where a ginger baby named Bertram lives?"

Vinny had time to think for a second.

"Uh... I think he lives in that house over there," he said, pointing across the street.

"Thank you," Stewie congratulated before he and Brian ran in that direction.

"Hmmm," Vinny thought. "There's something about that baby."

While Stewie and Brian arrived at the house, Stewie wondered, "I could have sworn I've seen that dog before."

"I haven't seen him before," Brian shrugged. "If I did, I vaguely remember him."

Cutaway: Again in live-action footage, Tony, watching the events on his TV this time, chuckled.

"I remember him," he said. "He's the dog I voiced."

Inside his bedroom, Bertram was drawing some plans with his crayons.

"I think for my next plan," he said to himself, "I'm going to build a rocket and send Stewie to the Moon with it. That will mean nothing can stand in my way for global conquest."

"Hello, Bertram," Stewie's voice greeted, getting his attention.

"Stewie?!" he gasped. "What are you doing here?"

"I didn't come here to challenge you to a duel or anything," Stewie replied as Brian came in. "I just want to have a chat with you."

"Very well," Bertram sighed. "Fire away."

"I recently discovered that I have a strand of red hair on my head," Stewie began. "The doctor assumed that I may have what's called the ginger gene. My dog Brian and I think that you had something to do with this."

"Well, if you have a strand of red hair," Bertram said, "then I didn't do anything to you. I sure wish I did, but I didn't. I find nothing wrong with having red hair and freckles myself. I think it's pretty natural. Just look at all those Rick Astley videos."

"Yes, I can tell. But does what you say explain why I may have it? Sure, my mother has red hair, but no ounce of freckles on her face."

"Hmmm, then maybe it's a coincidence. If you do have the ginger gene, be sure and let me know."

"I don't think so, Bertram," Brian explained. "We've come from the future, and you... died."

Bertram gasped. "What?"

"But you wouldn't want to know that," Stewie added before he and Brian put on pairs of sunglasses and got out a neuralizer. "Farewell, Bertram." Stewie pressed the minutes button and, in a flash, as both Brian and Stewie transported away from the time, Bertram was left dazed.

Bertram later shook his head and started wondering.

"What the hell happened?" he asked.