Disclaimer: I do not own these characters or this universe.
B:
"Hey Dad!" Rosie bounded up the stairs two at a time. John waved from the kitchen and went back to unpacking groceries.
"So, bring him in." He said.
"What?" Rosie sputtered.
"The boyfriend, Rosie, the boyfriend!" Sherlock called, matter-of-factly.
"Of course you'd know. Of course." Rosie sighed. "I don't know why I even bother any more." Rosie reluctantly walked down the stairs. "Please don't scare him this time!" She called behind her.
"We were helping you!" Sherlock called after her.
"I don't need help!" She yelled back.
Soon enough, her new boyfriend crossed the threshold of the living room and immediately noticed the two men sitting in their respective chairs, John's arms still full of groceries. He couldn't stifle the smile breaking out across his face.
"You're Sherlock Holmes! And uh..." John sighed.
"John Watson."
"Yeah." Rosie's boyfriend laughed.
"Name?" Sherlock stood abruptly. "And how many girlfriends have you had before?"
"Bruno. And, um, Rosie is my first." Bruno shifted uncomfortably. Sherlock hummed and began to circle around Bruno, like a shark about to attack. The ebony-haired teen fidgeted nervously, glancing at Rosie. She held her hand up in a calming gesture.
"Sherlock." John murmured, his voice a low warning as the detective started patting down Bruno.
Sherlock ignored him and reached into the teen's jacket pocket, pulling out a slip of paper. He held it up to his nose and sat back down, running his fingers over the edge of the paper.
Bruno laughed nervously and shifted from foot to foot. "What're you doing with-"
"Why did you lie?" Sherlock asked.
"What?" Bruno ran a hand through his dark curls. "I-I didn't-"
"About Rosie. She's not your first girlfriend. In fact, she's not your only girlfriend." Sherlock said cooly.
"That's not true!" Bruno shouted. "I'm not a cheater!"
"No? Then why do you have another girl's number, signed" Sherlock cleared his throat. "'XOXO Lily'" He read, mocking. Rosie turned on Bruno, a cool anger in her eyes.
"How dare you!" She slapped him across the face, a move she had learned from Aunt Molly.
"Baby I swear-"
"I'm not your baby, and I never will be!" Rosie grabbed at a necklace around her neck and ripped it off, tossing it at the boy's feet.
John dove for it with an animalistic ferocity, groceries abandoned on the floor next to him.
"To Rosie. All my love forever, Bruno." He read. "Well, that was a load of s***." He tossed it at Bruno. The teen turned back to Rosie.
"Bab-Rosie, I made a really bad decision, please, I'm sorry, I'll never do it again!"
"Liar." Sherlock pulled two more pieces of paper out of his pocket. "I've been documenting your interactions for two months now, and I've seen you kiss a total of eight girls, who, last I checked, were not Rosamund." Sherlock narrowed his eyes. "I'm giving you a ten second head start. Use it well. And, please, don't forget, Rosamund was on the Track and Field team."
Bruno dashed off, and Rosie followed, exactly eight seconds after the door slammed downstairs and two after Bruno left the living room.
"He's quick I'll give him that." John admitted. A muffled scream came from outside.
"But not quick enough, apparently." Sherlock muttered before standing up and grabbing his violin. "Hope he covers his face, otherwise, he may end up with more than a few missing teeth."
John peered out the window. "Well, Rosie was right. She doesn't need our help. At least not to beat up Bruno."