Chapter 18: Hail to the Chief

P29: I have nothing to say. This week has sucked. Right now I'm sick. I wanted to post this earlier but the site was down.

Sarge: Get up and make stories dirt-bag.

P29: Ok.

"So let me get this straight, you guys moved to this station-on blood gulch drive-and your jobs are to spy and fight with guys, who live on the exact opposite side of the road in a station named Blood Gulch Station Alpha?"

"Yep, those dirty blue bastards won't know what hit 'em." Sarge replied with a dramatic air punch. I look over at John who appears confused.

"Don't worry, new guy. Sarge is kind of funny, but he means well. Look, Lopez agrees with me." Donut commented to John while slapping a hand on his back, startling him. "Wow, you sure are big! Where did Damien find you?"

"Hey, where are Grif and Simmons? Shouldn't he be here complaining and kissing your ass Sarge?" I ask the leader of Red Squad. I had noticed the lack of Maroon and Orange as soon as I got here but only now asked about it. I'm a great friend, aren't I?

As soon as I asked he started laughing hysterically. "He began hitting on this one girl at café-lots of black clothing, blonde hair, and the works. Turned out she was a blue and she punched him in the dick so hard he had to go to the hospital." At this point he started cracking up again. I waited for him to finish and he continued. "Simmons has been over there giving suggestions to the hospital and looking for Oreo's for Grif. So, what can us here at Blood Gulch Station 1 do for you two?"

I blinked, surprised at his sudden change of pace. "Well, I need to find out about the recent activity of the White Fang." I pull out my scroll and hand it to him to download the file on. He nods before plugging it in and transferring the files. After he's done he turns to look at John.

"What can I do for you, here to join Red Squad?" he asked him. With Donut's creepy-ness, Sarge's aggression, and Lopez's- well, Lopez-ness I was afraid they would creep him out.

"Actually, I'm here to file a missing person's repo-"just as he was finishing we heard a loud crash and looked outside. There Penny had stopped the truck from crashing into Ruby. "Penny!" he shouted and ran out as both Penny and Ruby run into an alleyway. I rolled my eyes and ran after them.

-X-

After several twists and turns we finally catch up to them just as Penny admits to being a Robot. "I KNEW IT!" I shout, startling the other three. "Pay up Ruby." And she dug her hands into her pockets and gave my 25 lien.

Penny narrowed her eyes at me before turning to her brother. "John, I don't know why you're with Damien but I want you to go and help Ruby and Him. You're allowed out late so it won't look as suspicious." She then picked up Ruby and put her in a nearby trash bin. She then turned back to us. "Go you two. I'll stall them so you can get away." John then took my arm and we took few twists and turns.

While I was panting and trying to catch my breath John jumped when he heard a voice from an alleyway. "Hey John, what's up and who's this shrimp here?" I looked up at the person who just insulted my and was surprised. The guy was thin, almost painfully so. He was wearing the exact same outfit as Kirito from SAO. He had steel grey hair, and that color seemed to fit his scheme. His eyes where a dull green, almost white, and he wore black fingerless gloves. Strapped to his back was a pure black kilij.

It was then that I noticed John was staring at the person behind the man. She was pale, almost blue and her hair was purple. She had markings all over her clothes and was holding a bo staff. "Will, don't be rude! You should introduce yourself before making fun of people. Hi, I'm Cortana."

I would of fainted if a giant mecha hadn't come running passed. I got up and started running after but was stopped by will. "Listen, John's a friend of mine. Make sure he comes back alive or you'll have to deal with me, GOT IT!" I nodded until he dropped me and I continued with John at my side.

John and I kept running and barely managed to keep up with the thing. I turned to him and asked the most important question I could think of, "You like Cortana, don't you?" He stumbled for a bit before shaking his head, apparently at a loss for words. "If so, then why were you ogling her back there?" his cheeks immediately turn red and he looks forward, only to have him tackle me to avoid become road kill. "Thanks," I mutter.

"You're welcome, now we need to catch up to that mech." And he goes and jumps on a moving car. Yep, Master Chief the one and only. Hail to the chief. I jump after him and the cars start to close in on the mech.

I look in a side mirror and see some White Fang members chasing after us on bikes. "John, we'll take care of them while the rest of my team take care of the mech." He nods and flicks his shield onto his gauntlet. I didn't notice it at first but the edge of his shield is razor sharp. The pipes start to glow red and move to the shield. Soon the edge is also glowing red from Dust. He then throws it knocking a few solders down and catching others on fire. I just smile and start shooting.

It isn't long before finish with the grunts. We turn around but on another car slightly above us is Neo. She bows before we unleash our full fury on her, only to find out she moved right beside me. She leans in really close until were almost touching. She smiles before turning me to use as a shield for John's…shield. "OW!" I shout and she lays me down with the shield under me. I turn my head to see her fighting him, and winning. I groan as I sit just in time to see her fling John over the side. She turns to me, makes a call me sign, and disappears. Before I have time to process this, my car is flung into the air and I land at a small food vender nest to Sun. We all order some food.

"Hey guys," I ask the others between bites of food. "Does it ever bother you that, out of all the people we know, the most bad-ass are always girls?" They all think about it before replying with a resounding no. "Me neither."

P29: Why did I choose you to help me out with this announcement again?

Tucker: Because no one knows more about love than me, Bow Chicka Bow Wow

P29: Anyway, I am going to be making a short valentine story for Damien. And I want to make something very clear; this is not a part of the story. Which means his valentine doesn't have to be Weiss.

Tucker: So you lucky people get to decide who he gets funky with.

P29: Tucker, how many times have I told you, NOT IN THIS STORY!

Tucker: I can't help it! Every time I see a girl I just go Bow Chicka Bow Wow.

P29: Why me.