Chapter TWENTY EIGHT

Budget plan! - to make my hard-earned cash last
-Coffee: $10/week (only Americanos! I will become a hardcore black coffee drinker)
-Entertainment: $10/week (so like...one movie)

wow I'm at my budget limit already

I do not like Sora Hikari.

I do not like Sora Hikari.

I do not like Sora Hikari.

Right?

"YO, LADY!"

The exclamation makes me jump back from the cash register. Looking up, I stare at a middle school-aged boy and his lackeys, waiting with froyo cups in hand.

"We're ready to pay!"

Right. I'm supposed to be working.

Quickly ringing up the cost of their froyos, I hand them their change and glare until they leave. Manning the cash register has been surprisingly meditative and brain-numbing, so I resume Work Thoughts.

Shit, no way I like Sora. He's fricking Sora Hikari. He's supposed to be the enemy! Well, I guess we're technically friends now...

"SURPRISE!"

"Chillax, I hear you!" I shriek at the next customer who feels the need to announce their presence to the world. Glaring, I do a double take at who it is.

"...NAMINÉ!"

"How long have you been stuck here?" Naminé laughs.

I smother my bestie in a hug as best I can across the counter. "3 hours too long - and 2 more to go. At least it's dead half the time." I gesture at the empty store, which makes sense given that it's winter. "Whatcha doing here?"

"Being your number one loyal customer, as promised." Naminé grins. "It's a little cold, so can I just get a cup of toppings?"

"That's literally not worth the money," I point out. Leave it to clueless Naminé not knowing how to maximize gains at a froyo store. "First, you shamelessly sample every flavor in the store," I begin, passing her a handful of taster cups.

Naminé takes her time trying to get an itsy bitsy bit of each flavor. Finally, she picks a favorite, loads up, and slowly nibbles away while we chat.

Time passes a lot more quickly with the bestie present. When it's finally time to close shop at 9pm, we find a diner to grab food since I'm starving and basically had froyo for dinner.

"How often do you have work?" Naminé asks while we munch on fries.

"Three shifts a week, usually on the weekends cause of school," I explain, sucking on my fingers to savor the salty garlic taste. "I get a check every other week - it's pretty cool!"

"You're gonna be so busy," Naminé muses. "Are you still down for shopping on Friday?"

"Oh! I don't have work, but I probably shouldn't go." I shrug helplessly. "Budget cuts and all."

"Oh, that's right. I could...borrow you some money?" Naminé offers hesitantly.

"Nah, I'm trying to cut back on spending in general. And I know if I go with you, I'm gonna buy something. Window shopping doesn't exist in my dictionary." We chuckle at the thought.

"Well, do you still wanna hang out together?"

"Of course!" I exclaim. "But I don't wanna be the reason you don't go shopping."

"I really shouldn't be buying stuff either. We can do something that doesn't cost money. Like, uh…" Naminé looks around for ideas. "Go...for a walk?"

I burst into laughter. "Go on a walk? That's what old people do, Naminé!" Despite her suggestion, my heart warms at the thought of Naminé changing plans just to hang out with me. "I'm down for anything that's budget-friendly! Which I guess is hard to do…"

"..."

"..."

"Wanna just meet up after school and see how it goes?" I propose.

Naminé chuckles. "Sounds like a plan."

With a laugh, I feel like everything's gonna be okay. I guess that's what friends do.

While chatting with Naminé, I eventually work myself up to confess my recent musings to her. "This is gonna sound dumb, but, uh…" I muster the courage and let the words fall off my tongue. "I think I maybekindasorta like someone…?"

A long pause. I'm looking at my hands in my lap, so I can't even begin to guess what Naminé's thinking. Finally, the silence gets to me and I raise my head. To my surprise, she's smiling knowingly and...chuckling?

I bristle at the embarrassment running through me. Naminé seems to catch herself. "Oh gosh, I'm sorry Kairi, this isn't what you think." She composes herself, but the smirk remains. "I'm not laughing at you, I'm just...happy for you."

"...thanks," I mumble slowly, feeling reluctant to share the identity of my crush.

"So, are you going to tell him?" she asks.

"I guess I should, huh. But if he doesn't feel the same way, it's gonna be awkward…"

"First, I highly doubt that he'll reject you. I mean, you're Kairi!" Naminé gives me a pat on the back - a strong pat, more like a smack, and I always forget that Naminé packs a lot of strength in those twiggy arms. Damn artists…

"T - thanks, Naminé…" I chuckle weakly, though her words are very encouraging.

"Also, worst case scenario, you'll both be out of here in a year. Best case scenario, both of you have the summer and senior year to do couple-y things!"

"Yeah, you're right - " I pause, narrowing my eyes suspiciously. I haven't mentioned who it is that I like, but judging by the way she speaks, it's like she already knows. But how can she know? I literally just realized it myself a few days ago!

"What?" Naminé laughs at my pointed look.

"...how do you know who it is?" I ask, panicking.

Naminé rolls her eyes. "It's obvious, isn't it? I was teasing you about him awhile back. Also, you're kind of an open book with these types of things."

I blink, realizing what Naminé said is...very true. I sigh in relief - but then begin to panic again. "Wait, what do you mean 'open book'? Do you mean it was obvious to everyone except me? Does he know already that I like him? Oh my god, Naminé - "

"No, I take that back. That's not quite what I meant," she hurriedly cuts me off. "I mean, the two of us, we're...best friends, right?" She smiles sweetly. "We hang out a lot, and I'd like to think I know you pretty well. And I'm sure he doesn't know. I mean, we're talking about Roxas here - he'd probably think a girl throwing herself on him is just trying to be nice."

Relief settles once more. "You're right - wait a sec, Roxas?! You think I like Roxas?"

Naminé looks kinda confused for a second, and then she bursts into raucous laughter. Meanwhile, I'm watching her with a gaping expression.

Naminé can barely talk through her giggles. "I thought you wouldn't - oh god, that was the most hilarious thing ever! I could barely say it with a straight face - "

"Oh, I see how it is. Tease Kairi about her new widdle crush."

"C'mon, Kairi!" Naminé gives me a quick hug. "You're too cute. And too easy to tease. When'd you realize that you like Sora?"

Hearing Naminé say that aloud is a little frightening, because everything feels more real now. It's not just thoughts in my head - Naminé agrees too (and apparently knows me better than I know myself).

"I don't know, just recently…? I don't know!" I scratch my hair, trying to recall how everything happened. "He and I were talking, and I guess we've been hanging out more. And he said we were friends, which I guess we are? Then I realized he's helped me out with a lot of stuff, but he's always super low-key about it, you know? Which is cool. Then we were talking about the fact that we're friends and aren't enemies anymore and...that really annoyed me for some reason. Then I…" I gesture wildly with my hands to finish my thoughts. Did that verbal vomit of my stream of consciousness make any sense at all?

Of course, the bestie comes through and nods understandingly. "That's great."

"That's not great!" I exclaim. "That's scary as fuck."

"I mean...what are you scared of?"

"I'm scared of...you know, what if he doesn't like me?"

"C'mon, you're Kairi O'Hara. Chin up!" Naminé smacks me again. "Also, what if he doesn't like you?"

"That's very encouraging, Naminé."

"No, I mean, hypothetically speaking. What's the worst case scenario?"

"Uh, well...he doesn't like me, and then...that uh, sucks. Cause that'd be embarrassing."

"Why would that be embarrassing? Even if he doesn't like you, you can still like him."

"I know, but it just feels embarrassing."

"Why should you be embarrassed? Sora's got so many positive qualities: like you said, he's nice, he's helpful, he's humble - why wouldn't you like him?"

"I know, right?" I chuckle lightly - it's kinda strange, but hearing Naminé agree that Sora's likeable makes me giddy. Like I'm not the weird one for liking him.

"So...when're you gonna tell him?"

"I, uh, gotta think about that. Timing and all, you know. I mean last time, when Riku and I - oh shit."

"Uh, Kairi?"

"Oh, shit. Shit. Shit, this is so fucked up."

"Kairi, what's wrong?"

"Naminé...remember what I said about why Riku and I broke up? And then The Bonfire Incident?"

"Yeah, yeah...oh, yeah."

"Yeah."

"Shit."

I can't help chuckle. My bestie, Naminé, Miss Goodie Two-Shoes cursing at my misfortune.

"Yeah. Also, I just remembered...I promised Sora I'd talk to Riku to clear some things up." I sigh tiredly. "I guess I gotta do some things first…" I sigh tiredly.

"But first things first!"

"Oh, yes!" Naminé agrees, reaching for our burgers and colas. We dig into our meals, and I temporarily forget about awkward breakups and pending confessions, instead focusing on the present of eating junk food with my best friend.

Which is pretty nice.

My first dilemma is how to create an opportunity to talk to Riku. How do you create an opportunity to talk with your ex?

My conclusion, after a day's worth of racking my brains and Naminé's for ideas, is that there is no way to avoid the awkwardness. I just have to embrace it.

...as indirectly as possible first, starting with text.

I'd deleted Riku's number after we broke up, but asking around (or rather, asking Naminé to ask around - how do you like them indirect apples?) easily lands me his number again. I then wonder if Riku also deleted my number. If so, I should probably introduce myself in my text so he knows who's the unknown number. But if he didn't delete my number, it'd be super weird if I said that…

Embrace the awkwardness!

(As indirectly as possible.)

I compose a short text, anguish over the content for an hour too long, and finally hit send. Then, I toss my phone into my bag and go on with the rest of my day at school.

When I check my phone during lunch, he still hasn't responded. The nerve!

I give him till the end of the day...but still no response. Okay, now that's just plain rude. Everyone checks their phone at least once a day, right?

Wait, so that means...he's ignoring me?

Talk about immature!

The next step is to confirm the aforementioned fact. I try pleading with Naminé in three different ways, including bribery with vanilla soy milk lattes, but she refuses to send Riku a test text. In her words, "There's absolutely no reason for us to talk. He'll know you made me text him!"

God, that girl can be real stubborn when she wants to!

She has a valid point though. Who's someone I know who has a reasonable excuse to text Riku?

I would ask Sora, but somehow it feels weird asking my current crush to text my ex. So I go with my backup option.

"Why would you want me to do that?"

I shoot my cousin a deadpanned look. "C'mon, Tidus, can't you just do it without asking so many questions?"

"You know, that's exactly what people say when they're about to do something dangerous or dumb. Or both."

"You're just sending a text. It's neither dangerous nor dumb."

"In what world is me texting your ex-boyfriend for you not dumb?"

"I have my reasons, okay? Just do me a favor."

"It just doesn't make sense. If you wanna talk to him, why don't you text him yourself? Or just go to practice with me in a bit - he'll be there for sure."

"Tidus can you just text him?!"

"...you're acting weird, Kairi."

I sigh. "No shit. I'm trying to get some closure with my ex - that's a totally normal, not weird thing to do."

"I still don't get why you need me to text him."

"Never mind, forget it." I quickly realize this is just a huge waste of time. "I'll figure something out."

As I'm walking away, Tidus calls out to me.

"He says, 'watch your ass get kicked.'"

I whirl around with narrowed eyes. "What?"

"Riku. You said I just had to text him anything, so I said, 'ready to get your ass kicked?' And he responded."

I dash up to Tidus with wide eyes. "You texted him, like just now?"

"Yeah."

"And he responded like, just now?"

"Yeah."

"...what the fuck? So he is avoiding me!"

"Hey, a 'thank you' would be nice."

I pause my frantic deciphering of Riku's actions to consider Tidus' words. Despite me acting a little strangely, he still went along with my request, no questions asked. Gosh, Tidus, are you determined to be the better cousin out of the two of us?

"...thanks."

"See, wasn't that hard, right? So...why's Riku ignoring you? I thought you guys broke up like...a year ago."

"8 months," I mumble subconsciously. "Uh, we just have some things to clear up."

"Did you find out he was cheating on you?"

I stare at Tidus with boggled eyes. "What the hell? No! I mean...did he?"

Tidus shrugs. "Then, are you so guilty that you're confessing something to him?"

"What, are you saying that I cheated on him? Where the hell are you coming up with these ideas?"

"Just all the sitcoms I've been watching...probably a bit too much…"

"What? You're still watching them? I thought you and Selphie broke up!"

Ah, I guess it's been awhile since my tact (or lack thereof) made an appearance. But it's been almost a month since they broke up...he's probably over it, right?

Tidus falls quiet, and I suppose that's not exactly the case. He finally breaks the silence with, "Yeah...the shows are so addicting though. So dramatic."

Avoiding the subject? I can do that. "You're the one who said the plots are so clichéd."

"Doesn't mean they can't be clichéd and good."

I don't miss Tidus' averted gaze and downcast expression. Well, I'll bookmark this conversation for another day.

Because first things first, I have an ex-boyfriend to confront.

(As indirectly as possible.)

I give him the benefit of doubt and send a second awkward text (painstakingly constructed with another precious hour of my time). Still no response. Finally, I'm left with no choice.

I simply have to report my failure to engage the enemy - ahem, ex.

"I tried," I emphasize, making sure to sound really sincere. "But I think he's avoiding me, so it's probably not a good idea for me to bother him. Right?" Right!

Sora narrows his eyes suspiciously. "What exactly do you mean by, 'you tried'?"

"I reached out to him! Twice!"

"You tried talking to him and he said he doesn't want to talk?"

"...I tried talking to him twice," via text, "and he didn't respond to me!"

"Wait, so does he know you're trying to reach him?"

"Of course!" What sane teenager doesn't check his phone regularly?

"Well, that's strange," Sora acknowledges. "Cause we were just talking about you the other day, and he was at least open to talking..."

"You guys were talking about me?" I squeak. Talk about awkward! "What were you talking about?"

Sora slowly grins. "If you wanna know, you gotta talk to Riku! Hey, I know! Lemme call him right now, I think he's free Thursdays afterschool…"

I stare in horror at the scene unfolding before me, too startled to even stop Sora. Half of me hopes Riku doesn't pick up, and then when Sora starts talking, I can only dumbly hope this isn't actually happening.

Sora hangs up with a satisfied smile. "He's got time, he'll meet you here in five minutes!"

What the shit.

This is actually happening?

"W - wait!" I stammer as Sora's walking off. He turns around and looks at me curiously. "Uh...are you leaving now?"

Sora looks around nervously. "Well, yeah...I mean, I don't think I should be here when you guys talk."

"Oh. Right." My eyes dart around, desperately searching for an idea to get me out of this. "You know, Sora, I just remembered, I'm supposed to...uh, I can't really, uh, do this. Yeah. I can't." I flat out give up on coming up with an excuse and go with the truth. I cannot go through with this - not now, maybe not ever.

Sora frowns. "I know it's awkward, but remember: it won't be awkward afterwards! Plus, it's Riku. The worst he'll do is give you that judgey glare."

"I'm not scared of his judgey glare!"

"Then you'll be fine!" Sora rushes over and gives me a pat on the shoulder. "Think about the most nervous you've ever been. This pales in comparison!"

The most nervous I've ever been...is an abstract memory that can't compare to the very real nerves I feel here and now. Sora's advice is crap, but I can't tell him that cause I like him now. Urgh.

"You said you owe me one, remember! If you do this for me, we'll be even! I'll be super grateful too. C'mon, Kairi!"

The thought of doing a favor for Sora and making him happy is somewhat motivating. URGH, this is why having a crush on someone sucks! Things that make no logical sense suddenly become perfectly rational! If talking to my ex will make Sora happy, then of course it's worth it, right?

Right?

"I'll see you later, Kairi!" Sora runs off before Riku can get here.

Right?

Oh god. What the hell am I doing?

Just as I'm torn between staying rooted in position and getting the hell away from here, I realize I've delayed my decision for too long that someone else has chosen for me.

I see him before he sees me, because his head's still looking around curiously, presumably for me. My heart literally jumps up into my throat and stays there as I watch him recognize me, wave, and approach. Oh god, this is happening. This is all Riku's fault for answering the phone. Sora's fault for calling him. God, this is my fault for liking Sora in the first place, isn't it? Goddammit.

When he's less than an arm's length away, he smiles.

"Hey Kairi. What's up?"

A/N: Eek we're finally getting somewhere! It's been such an extended ride, and I'm probably spending more time rereading my stuff than writing at this point cause even I don't remember all the subplots I've scattered in this story. Thank you soso much to everyone who's followed this story so far, from reader to reviewer alike - I really appreciate your support! You are my main motivation to finish telling Kairi's story, and I hope you stick around for the upcoming conclusion!