YAMI NO MATSUEI – DESCENDANTS OF DARKNESS

THE SHADOWS OF MY PAST

Chapter Nine: Twilight

Strong gusts of wind swirled around me as more shadows shot out from the dark and met all the bullets whizzing towards me. The ground shook underneath everyone's feet. The floor cracked from my feet as additional shadows burrowed deep in the ground and sped towards my foes.

And then there were screams from the ones before me, a good amount of them killed as my servant shadows cut through them. Slowly but surely, their numbers dwindled.

I had Mako-san stay behind me, the old man protected by a shadow vacuum that I have hailed forth. He could touch anything and anyone, but nothing could harm him as long as I was standing, lucid, and in control. I felt his hands behind my back while I did my best to shield him from the gory sight before me.

So now Mako-san knew my other self – the very one that I kept hidden from him for years.

The more that I thought about my loved ones, the more relentless my attacks became. I lost my father from illness. I drove my sister away due to my self-righteous ways. I practically killed my mother because I severed the ties that bound our family together. I almost lost Mako-san because I waited for my right time to settle the score with Ishino.

Now, I was running the risk of losing Mako-san because of my true and darker half.

However, my worries did not matter to me at least for now. Mako-san's safety was my priority. I would not allow another loved one harmed. Nothing and no one would harm him – especially Ishino. I would rather die first before that would ever happen again.

The hail of gunfire did not stop as more men joined the fold in shooting Mako-san and me down, but to no avail. Their screams reverberated in the huge warehouse where the war between Ishino and me had erupted.

The coward, however, was not seen. He hid behind his men, his voice audible yet frantic as he repeatedly yelled at his men to kill me. His frustration and anger rose as his men kept failing.

Finally, the last batch of men was cut down. Their mutilated bodies fell on the ground and joined the many others who fell before them, their blood mixing into a thick pool of crimson that became such a familiar sight to me for more than five years as an avenger.

And there was Ishino. He stood alone. He was surrounded by the bodies of his fallen men.

My eyes narrowed more and the blood inside me pounded in my ears. My blood felt thicker than usual as the shadows sucked into that rage bottled up inside me.

I have waited for this moment for years.

I felt Mako-san's trembling hand on my shoulder. That hand of his relaxed once I rested my hand, his reciprocation was a momentary yet tighter grip on my hand.

I then walked away from Mako-san while I mentally ordered my shadows to protect him at all costs. Each step away from Mako-san and closer to Ishino sent me deeper into the darkness that always resided in the core of my being.

By the time that I was halfway there to Ishino, all that I could think of was retribution. My soul had been completely lost from that time on.

The coward's eyes were wide and his hands trembled as he held a gun, those eyes of his going wider as my shadows yanked the gun away from his hand.

However, a couple of shots came out from Ishino's gun before he lost his weapon to my shadows.

Next, the shadows wrapped around Ishino's body as if they were part of a dark vise under my command.

Ishino's screams echoed throughout the near-empty warehouse as the shadows wrapped and stretched Ishino's body. The sound of his bones breaking and cracking mixed along with the pitiful and blood-curdling sounds of his plea.

My body shook with such anger. I felt my strength slowly but surely ebb away – most probably because I expended much psychic energy from this battle. I kept telling my body, "Just a little more and it'll soon be over. Just a little more…."

"Let me go!! You're going to Hell for this!! Don't kill me!!" Ishino screamed as he flailed his arms, his panic only worsening as he remembered the shadows that kept him bound.

"Seii-kun…" said Mako-san just a few feet behind me, "Please stop."

Although Mako-san's voice sounded worried, I told him as sweat began to bead from my forehead and my body trembled more prominently, "Just a little longer, Mako-san. Everything will be fine after this. I promise."

But once I faced Ishino, I felt my countenance harden ten-fold. I stared down at my long-time nemesis. I felt liberated that the pretenses were now dropped. Gone was the dutiful and loyal chief-of-staff and what was left behind was the remaining member of my family who could set matters right for the repose of my oppressed loved ones' souls.

For the first time in many years, I let the hot tears flow from me. Those tears of mine mixed with the cold sweat beading on my skin. As I closed the distance between my enemy and me, my shadows tightened their choke-hold on his neck. "I've already been in Hell all this time, Ishino. Do you think I'd have any qualms in dragging you down with me?"

Another series of screams escaped Ishino's lips. I did not want the scoundrel to die…not just yet. I want to see and hear him agonize for everyone he had hurt – loved one or not….

Every broken bone…

Every stretched limb….

Every scream released…

Every frantic plea…

All of that poured into that vast pit sitting in the core of my being – the very same one which had been filled with sadness for all that was lost, and hatred for the one who directly and indirectly caused those losses.

Ishino had to pay. It was as simple as that.

More hate stirred inside me.

The shadows responded accordingly, stretching out the time yet making Ishino's agony more strongly-felt.

Each scream that escaped from the bastard's lips seemed as if it was long-yearned music to my ears.

Soon, blood began to ooze from Ishino's nose and lips...the sight stirring my blood much more.

When that was not enough, the shadows did exactly what had been running inside my wildest and sickest reveries about the man…

The man let out another scream – this long one being a much more blood-curdling one than its predecessors.

As cold as my body felt by this time, I could feel a smirk of sick satisfaction escape from my lips as I saw the man's eyes bulge out from what my shadows showed him pull out from his body…all while that man's body convulsed before me.

While that still-beating heart of Ishino's was right in front of our faces to stare at, I thought, "An eye for an eye…. A heart for a heart… A life for a life… A soul for a soul… I would never forgive you or anyone who dare hurt those I love… Never…"

I then ordered my shadows to hand over Ishino's heart to me. This was the first time that my hands had been soiled by blood or dirt from my five-year secret life, yet this one was well-worth the trouble. The intoxicating feeling of revenge being served ran its sweet thickness through my veins. I willed all my strength to go to my hand.

Shortly before then, I crushed Ishino's heart before him. My entire being felt this surge, sending me into a temporary yet wonderful madness as I saw the man's eyes bulge much more severely out of horror.

It was now time...

Once that train of thought had ended, half of my shadows stretched Ishino's limbs and the other half cut off his limbs. The last stroke for retribution was when the shadows snapped his neck as if it was a twig…all with a wave of the bloody hand which earlier crushed his heart.

Then it was over…

My shadows let go of my enemy's maimed and lifeless body. That body of his landed in the pool of blood and the remnants of his heart fell on my feet.

In the very moment that I was released from my insanity and the adrenaline inside my body returned to normal, my body trembled from the cold. My legs gave in and I felt arms catch me from behind.

The world then became dark for me, my senses dulling and eventually succumbing to the darkness as I heard Mako-san pleading for me to hold on.

----------------------

The room was nearly dark, the moonlight creeping from the open window and a small candle by the nightstand being the only sources of illumination.

When I opened my eyes and saw a blurry yet familiar image, I smiled especially when I confirmed who that blurry image was when he whispered, "Seii-kun…."

My mind was hazy and my throat was dry as I mumbled, "Where am I?"

It took a while for the dear old man to tell me, "We're at home, my boy. It's all over now."

I tried to move, but there was no strength and plenty of pain. There was also no more blood. No more evidence of the grotesque crime that I committed in the name of retribution.

To my horror, I saw my shadows wrapping around my hands as if they were caressing me and tending for my needs…all of this happening before the old man.

"No, don't worry. The shadows and I watched over you," was the old man's explanation. I heard him let out a sigh of relief as I relaxed and was relieved of the fact that I did not have to hide my true self to him anymore...that he was not afraid of who and what I really was...

That he was not going to leave me because of who and what I really was...

The old man's voice was soothing to my ears, yet there was a hint of sadness in his voice. He told me in a voice that nearly cracked, "This is all that I could do, Seii-kun. I did everything that I could."

The tears that beaded at the corner of my eyes now escaped from me and flowed down my cold cheeks. The tears were not from the pain, or from the fact that the final bullets from Ishino's gun hit fatal parts of my body, or from the fact that the inevitable was staring down at my face.

I was sad because I made the old man cry…just as I made my mother cry. It broke my heart that I broke another loved one's heart.

"I don't think I can hold on, Mako-san. I'm sorry," I whispered back, doing my best to tighten the hold on the old man's hand. "I'm sorry. I didn't want to leave you alone."

Mako-san smiled gently and swept away the unruly strands of hair over my forehead and cheeks. I could tell from his voice that he was doing his best to hold back his tears…to make our poignant time together as comfortable for me as possible. "You're not leaving me alone. You've never left me alone. All these years, you've always been by my side. I'm proud of you. You've made them proud as well. Now they could rest in peace…thanks to you."

"Forgive me," was my whispered response, my lips trembling due to the cold and involuntary reflexes.

As Mako-san looked at me, I clarified to him although my strength slowly but surely ebbed away, "The gods… Father… Mother… Inari… You… Forgive me, please…."

"You haven't done anything wrong, Son. It is you who needs to forgive you. You're the only one who could give peace to you. As to everyone, most especially me, we all know how much you've given up for us. Instead of asking for forgiveness, be open to receive the love and gratitude that we have for you," said Mako-san with a warmer yet teary-eyed smile.

I remembered seeing that face of the old man's for as long as I could remember, especially on times wherein I was not in the best of health.

The long hours whiled away. Throughout that entire time, my senses dulled even more significantly.

Mako-san was by my bedside in a fashion that Father used to do whenever I was sick. Perhaps it was something that Father had acquired from him since Mako-san pretty much loved Father as a son. "We'll be reunited again, Seii-kun. You've always been a good son, and I love you. We all love you. We're just sorry that you had to suffer so much for us."

"No regrets," was my reply, a smile wanly escaping from my lips. "I'd do it all over again if given a choice. I love you, Mako-san… Thank you for everything…"

I heard the old man bite back a sob for a couple of seconds before he managed to say, "I love you, too, my Son. You've always been a good son. A son that any father would be proud of…."

My senses blurred more as it became harder to breathe. The only comfort that helped me was the old man's touch and affection. I guess it was true that no matter how old one would get, there would always be a remnant of childhood left within him.

Just as a child would not want to be left alone especially in the dark….

Just as a child would melt into a parent's touch especially during a frightful and inopportune time…

Just as a child would love to have his parent placate his fears…

Just as a child would not want to be left alone with shadows lurking out from the void – no matter how familiar, friendly, and obedient those shadows have been…

The old man gave me his final gift of generosity – my childhood. He gave me back the childhood that I have lost long ago due to the circumstances set before me. He allowed me to be the child that I have always been since my father died – the child that I have suppressed all these years.

I did not know if there was an afterlife. If there was not an afterlife, these moments would be a priceless end for one who had committed so much carnage. If there was such a thing as an afterlife, this memory would be one that would linger within my heart for eternity.

And I would never forget or regret that I lived and was about to die for those who I loved dearly.

Before I closed my eyes and my breath became shallower still, I felt the old man's lips plant a lingering kiss on my cold forehead with such fatherly affection. My ears faintly heard him hold back his sobs. My clammy skin felt his gentle and soothing touches.

All of Mako-san's gestures were a balm to my weary and empty soul.

For the first time in my life, I now let things be. I offered a petition to the gods - not for me but for the loved ones who left this earth before me and the one who I was about to leave behind.

I surrendered to the inevitable, comforted by the fact that these moments would not be spent alone for there was the old man and my shadows – two of my closest and trusted loved ones who kept me company all these years.

I then closed my eyes and succumbed to the darkness….

End of Chapter Nine

Normal Disclaimer

I do not own Yami no Matsuei and its lovable characters. However, I do own this fic and Chief Satori and other original characters.