Yeah, so, smut fic's turning into a many-thousand long document. Who knows how long it'll get before I decide to end it, especially with how much I'm enjoying stuffing fluff and sex into it. We'll see. Oh, and Artemis's hairstyle I was kinda thinking of Daenerys's hair. Imagine that sort of style. Or don't, I guess. I can't decide.

"How would you feel about going to a dance with me?"

"What?" Artemis asked, rolling over to look at him in confusion.

"A dance. This is my senior year, I have prom. I'm asking if you'll be my date," Percy explained, a lazy smile curling onto his face. They were both sprawled across Percy's bed, Artemis visiting for the weekend like she usually did. It was eleven at night but it was too annoyingly hot to touch. There really was no excuse for it to be this hot in spring, especially in New York.

"Is this 'prom' a big thing?" Artemis questioned.

"For a normal high schooler, yes," Percy sighed. "For me, less so, but I'd like to try and be normal while there are no wars going on."

"You're dating a goddess, Percy," Artemis pointed out. "That isn't necessarily considered normal."

"You act normal enough. I can pretend you're just my normal, mortal girlfriend."

"That teleports into your apartment."

"Shut up." Percy glanced sideways at her. "So? Will you come?"

"You had said most people disrespect you?" Artemis asked instead.

Percy's eyebrows furrowed in confusion. "Uh, sort of. They don't like me. They consider me 'weak,' partially because I don't really make any friends. Then again, all demigods are usually bullied. Nothing new."

"Then of course," Artemis grinned. "Don't worry, I'll make sure they know not to mess with you. When is it?"

Percy smiled back, intertwining their hand and rolling over to face her. "Next Saturday." Artemis drowsily pressed a messy kiss to his lips before setting her head down mere inches from his own. Percy squeezed her hand in response, watching as she fell before he followed.

/.\

"Thalia, tell me more about this 'prom,'" Artemis asked her lieutenant the next day.

Thalia's face lit up. "Did Percy ask you to be his date?" Artemis nodded and Thalia grinned. "Well, it's this dance that everyone goes to at the end of high school and they'll take their dates there. Usually, a king and queen couple is announced, but since they won't even know you I highly doubt you'll have to worry about that. Everyone dresses up all fancy and just all that sappy romantic shit."

"So I will need a dress then, correct?" Thalia nodded. "I'm assuming you'll help me with that?"

"Of course. You don't know the first thing about dresses or dances, you'll need my help," Thalia smirked.

Artemis looked offended. "I know how to dance!"

"I have no doubt about that," Thalia said, "I mean you don't know anything about high school dances."

"You're right," Artemis admitted, to absolutely no one's surprise. "We'll have to grab a dress in the next few days. Just no makeup."

Thalia, of course, ended up bugging her enough for Artemis to let her put some on. That happens on Saturday, though, and that's not yet come.

/.\

"I can't believe my baby's going to prom!" Sally squealed as Percy stood in the living room with a suit on. It was just a normal white suit with a black jacket and pants and a sea green tie, kindly provided by Poseidon.

"I can't believe I'm going to prom," Percy replied. "I thought I'd be dead by now. Oh, well. Though if you'd told me a few years ago I'd be going with Artemis I would've thought you'd gone insane."

"I still don't understand how you managed to get with a maiden goddess," Paul sighed. "Artemis's nice and all but I don't get it."

"Don't worry, I don't either," Percy agreed, tugging nervously at his tie. "Do you think she'll like this? Prom, me"

"Percy, she'll love it," Sally soothed. "Both things. She's going to dance with the most handsome man I know."

"Even more than Paul?" Percy teased.

"You're young, I'm over here with my grey hairs. Of course you'd look better," Paul laughed.

"Paul, you're lovely," Sally told him. "Stop that." A knock at the door. Percy flinched and backed over out of sight of the doorway. Sally sighed and went to open the door herself.

"Hello, Sally," Artemis greeted as the woman opened the door.

"Artemis!" The mother greeted, smiling warmly. "Come in, come in. You look beautiful."

Percy was tapping his foot anxiously as Artemis came into his view and him into hers. She was breathtaking. Her dress was an ankle-length silver gown with a slit on one side going up to the knee. Her hair was half done up in braids, the rest flowing freely while the braids were woven together and draped over the rest. She had diluted red lipstick on with just a touch of silver eyeshadow as well as a bit of eyeliner.

"Percy, close your mouth and greet your date like a gentleman," Sally scolded.

Percy's jaw snapped shut and he walked up to Artemis, bowing at the waist and holding his hand out. "Pleasure to see you, my lady. You look stunning."

"Too much, Percy, too much," Artemis chuckled but took his hand anyway. "Nice try though."

"Aw, damn, I wanted to be fancy," Percy whined playfully. "Let me have my fun."

"Do what you want, just don't expect me to reply the same way," Artemis said, rolling her eyes. "Are we taking your step-father's car?"

"Duh," Percy answered, holding out his elbow. "Shall we, my lady?"

"You'd better not be doing this the whole night," Artemis warned as she accepted his arm. "I'll find a way to kill you."

"Just revive me after and it'll be fine."

/.\

"I can't wait to see their faces when I arrive with you," Percy smirked as they exited the car. "It'll be perfect."

"Too bad we don't have a camera, then," Artemis replied. "If you're so sure it'll be that good."

"Oh, don't you worry, they'll expect me to either bail or show up with some ugly nerd," Percy scoffed. "You'll be quite the surprise."

"If any of then flirt with me I swear they'll get kicked in the balls," Artemis scowled.

"If I know the boys in my school then I know they'll all want to. I do think a kick to the balls would scare the rest of them off though."

"Wimps."

Percy looked offended. "Alright, you've never been kicked in the balls. It's much more painful than you think!"

"More than being stabbed?"

"More than being stabbed."

Artemis looked disbelieving. "Yeah, sure, I'll believe you."

"I can't get anywhere with you," Percy sighed, pushing open the doors to the gymnasium.

Artemis laughed. "No, no you can't. Maybe if you gave me believable facts I'd believe you."

"You're not a man. You wouldn't understand," Percy complained. Artemis rolled her eyes. "What? It's true!"

He then noticed that Artemis had focused in on a movement to the side. From his direct left, opposite side that Artemis was on, two of the boys were approaching him. "You got a date, Jackson?" One yelled. "Let's see who'd be stupid enough to agree to that!"

Percy cringed horribly while Artemis looked furious. "Shut your dirty mouths you bastards!" She snapped, stepping around Percy with fire in her eyes. The boys looked taken aback.

"Sorry, you must be misled," another boy joined in, trying to sound smooth. He approached Artemis, smiling. "This guy's a loser. You'd be much better off with me."

"Like fuck I would," Artemis snarled, following up on her promise and giving him a kick straight to the balls. He howled and crumpled to the ground. She heard Percy burst out laughing behind her and smiled at him over her shoulder. She noticed the other two boys fleeing the scene and other males backing away from her.

Percy slung an arm around her shoulder. "I love you so much, you know that?"

"I do, you tell me often. Think that scared them off?"

"They'll be scarred for life."

"Mission accomplished, then."

School starts tomorrow. Goddammit. Ideas for April Fools pranks? I'll squeeze as many of your suggestions into the next chapter as I can fit. Cheers!