I'll Always Find Peace In The Meadow
Previously...
I do the only thing I can think of. I run.
I run as fast as I can out of the cafeteria doors. There's only two places I can go: the toilets, or the library. I don't care which one I end up in, I just know that I have to get away before someone sees me upset and affected by this. I hate giving them ammunition.
However, my plan doesn't play out well - then again, when does it ever? Just as I reach the end of the first hall in my escape from the cafeteria, turning right, I crash into someone. They are on their way to the cafeteria it seems. As our bodies collide, the person instantly wraps their fingers around my arms, holding me up and preventing me from falling, which would have been inevitable otherwise.
I keep my head low as the pressure of my tears grows stronger. All I want is to get far away from everyone as quickly as I can.
"Sorry," I mumble to the person, as I try to pull away, but they don't let go. If anything, their grip tightens.
"B-bella?"
Chapter Ten: 'Duly noted' (Bella POV)
Monday 24 April 2017
The nervous voice of the person still holding me sounds all too familiar. My head whips up to see if my guess is correct. It is. Edward is the person I collided with, and he is the one still stopping me from leaving. "Are you okay? What's wrong?" he asks, the nervousness giving way for concern.
And it's genuine. He has genuine concern for my well being. This only makes me want to cry harder. I have to get away.
"I... I'm... I have to go," I finally say, before yanking my arms from his grasp and running down the hall.
I end up in the library. I barely choke out a "hello" to a concerned looking Mrs. Jensen, before collapsing onto the floor in my secluded corner of the library.
I finally allow myself to cry quietly, burying my head into my hands. I don't know what to do. It's never going to stop. These constant attacks on me will continue for as long as I have to endure coming to this hell hole. I thought I could handle them. I thought I had found a way to ignore the stupid pranks and jokes.
I guess not. Today proves I'm not as strong as I thought I was. Today proves that I'm weak. I'll never be able to defend myself against someone like Rosalie Hale. Look at what she orchestrated today? The posters and then the banner?! How am I meant to ignore that? Easy answer: I can't. No one could.
I pick my head up from my hands and lean back against the wall behind me. Stretching my legs out in front of me, I look at nothing in particular in the space ahead of me, as I reach up with my right hand to play with my locket.
I feel numb. Emotionless now. Is that good or bad?
Mrs. Jensen pokes her head around the bookcase to my left, asking if I'm okay. I tell her that I am, that I'm just being silly. It may not seem like the case to me, but to anyone else, I could be overreacting. She looks apprehensive, but concedes and leaves me alone.
I close my eyes and that's how I stay for the next five minutes or so. I'm happy to stay like this for the remainder of lunch. I might even stay here for the remainder of the day. Alone.
Others don't have the same plan for me, unfortunately.
A throat clearing startles me. My eyes snap open. Edward is stood at the end of the bookcase that's to my left, close to where Mrs. Jensen poked her head around. "Hi," he says quietly, looking down at me, a nervousness in his green gaze.
I frown and glance away from him, my stubbornness and natural reaction to him making an appearance. I don't say "hello" back. I just ignore him. He sighs, and walks towards me, stopping directly in front of me. From my current position, looking out at my feet, I can see his legs in front of them. The soles of my shoes are almost touching his trousers.
He seems to wait for a moment, maybe to see if I'll look up or anything. I don't. Instead, I continue to be rude and ignore him. Eventually, he lifts his left foot slightly off of the floor, and taps the side of my right shoe with it.
"Move over," he demands in a soft, hushed voice. At first I'm confused, and reluctant. When he doesn't show any sign of giving up, I huff as I bum shuffle to my left, until my side is pressed up against the bookshelves.
He thanks me quietly and sits himself down beside me, stretching his legs out in front of him, just like I have. We are sat side by side, in identical positions. I keep my act up, not turning to look at him, even when I feel his eyes on the side of my face.
Eventually he begins moving, opening his bag up, which is making a lot of noise, crinkling mostly, as he digs around inside of it. "Can we eat in here?" he asks, leaning over slightly to whisper his question in my ear. The skin of my ear and neck where his hot breath brushes erupts into tiny goosebumps. I blush slightly at my involuntary reaction to his whisper: my escalated heart rate and suddenly damp palms.
I shrug in response, giving him no verbal reply.
"Okay then," he says after a silent pause. He pulls something from the front of his bag, before stretching forward to place it by his feet. After leaning back against the wall behind us, he sighs happily, getting comfortable by wriggling around on the floor. Every time he moves to the left, he bumps into me. I'm about to tell him to quit it and go away, but he stops just before I get the chance.
I stealthily watch out the corner of my eye as he opens the triangular box and pulls out half a sandwich. My eyes quickly move away at the sight, not wanting to torture myself further. I am very hungry now that I realise I never made it to the lunch line to get some food. Obviously Edward did, because that is one of the sandwiches that the school sells.
"Here. Take this," I hear him say, right before half of a sandwich appears in front of me. I turn my head sharply to face Edward, not prepared for how close he is. My nose touches his, and after only a second of contact, we both put some distance between us. I clear my throat while Edward averts his eyes briefly, both of us blushing a bit.
After taking a deep breath in, and releasing it slowly, he looks back into my eyes. He smiles softly as he urges the sandwich close to me again. "Take it," he demands.
"What? No, it's yours," I protest, pushing his hand away.
"When someone offers you something, the kind thing to do is accept it without protesting," he says, his small soft smile turning into a smirk. I stare at him, my mouth gaping open slightly. After a while, it's obvious I'm not going to take it. He sighs and rolls his eyes, before tilting his head to the side a bit. "Bella," he begins, his voice low and smooth. It's the first time I've heard this tone of voice from him, and I'm momentarily stunned. "Will you please take the food?" he begs.
Our eyes are locked, and for some reason, I'm unwilling to remove my gaze from his. He raises an eyebrow and I snap out of my weird trance, shaking my head to dispel whatever has come over me. Stupid Bella. Stop staring like a creep.
"Thank you," I concede quietly, looking down at his offering as I tentatively take it from his hand. I check the filling of the sandwich, before raising it to my mouth. I'm just about to take a bite when Edward asks something I was not expecting, ceasing my movements.
"What happened to your hands? You look like you went a round of bare knuckle fighting."
"I... Um... I f-fell," I answer, stuttering like a guilty suspect under interrogation, giving him the first excuse that came to mind.
"You fell? And it caused that?" he asks disbelievingly.
My emotions from earlier return instantly. My head whips to the side, my cheeks burning with anger. "Are you calling me a liar?" I ask defensively. Of course he's calling me a liar. Just look at the mess my hands are in.
"Huh? No! What?! No, I'm not. I just... shit. I was only making conversation," he says, his voice slightly panicky.
"No, you weren't. You were being nosy?" I argue back, turning my head to face the bookcase to my left, giving Edward a view of the back of my head. I take a large bite out of the sandwich... the sandwich that Edward so kindly gave me half of. Shit. What are you doing, Bella? I ask myself. All the anger immediately melts away.
I slowly turn my head back towards Edward, feeling rather guilty in this moment. He is sat with his head lowered, sulking into his food as he nibbles at the edge of his half of the sandwich we are sharing.
I sigh, rolling my eyes at what I'm about to do. "How did you know where to find me?" I ask in a voice that is forecably light, trying to initiate a conversation. Thinking back over the past week, I realise that I have never started a conversation with Edward. He's the one to always try. I push down the guilt that begins building inside of me.
It doesn't matter. I'm better without friends, I tell myself.
Edward raises his head to look at me, surprise evident in his features. "I... eer..." he starts to stutter. I have to stop myself from rolling my eyes. Get on with it. "I don't know much about you, but I've seen you reading a lot so I figured I'd try here first?" he says, though it comes out as more of a question, like he's asking me if it's a good enough answer.
I nod silently, acknowledging his answer as I turn my head to look forward again. I take another bite and think over his words. Without looking at him, I ask, "Where would you have tried next, if I wasn't here?"
I see him turn his head to look at me out the corner of my eye, but I don't follow suit. I don't want to relive what happened a few minutes ago. It was awkward enough the first time. He hums while he thinks, and I find myself eager to know where he would've checked next.
"The gym?" he guesses unsurely.
My nose wrinkles immediately, causing him to laugh out loud. I'm glad no one comes here at lunch, at least not all that often. My secret hiding place wouldn't have been much of a secret anymore, if another student was in here, thanks to his laugh.
His laugh… that's the first time I've heard him laugh.
"So... not a fan of sports then?" he asks. I can't help but notice the tone of genuine curiosity mixed in with the humour. I shake my head wordlessly.
"Duly noted," he replies, turning his face away from me as he takes another bite of his lunch. After finishing my lunch, I offer Edward a weak upturn of my lips. I wouldn't really call it a smile, nor a grimace. Somewhere in the middle, perhaps?
Feeling an awkward silence coming soon, I decide to end our interaction here and now. "I should get to class," I say as I attempt to stand. Given the small amount of space I have, and my naturally clumsy nature, doing so gracefully is well and truly impossible. I am almost to my feet when I stumble over my laces - they must have come loose without my knowledge - and begin to fall face first to the floor.
Edward is quick to catch me, preventing me from causing myself injury. He scrambles from his place on the floor, leaning forward to catch my upper body. I end up on my knees instead of on my face, which is a better outcome.
All would have been perfect after that; I would have thanked Edward and made my way to my next class. However, during his rescue, he accidently kicks his bag over, sending it's contents flying.
The reason for the amount of crinkling noise his bag made earlier becomes clear now. As his foot hits his bag, it topples over and a mountain of papers comes spilling out. Stick bodies topped with yellow heads on white paper covers the floor in front of me.
Edward tenses up beside me, his breathing audibly halting. With a shaking hand, I reach forward and pick up the top poster of the pile.
BELLA SWAN
FORKS'ES FRUITLOOP
My heart drops to my stomach as my eyes fill with more tears. I'm so sick of crying! Keeping the first poster in my hand, I reach down to pick up the rest, piling them in my hands.
I slowly stand up, trembling as I struggle to my feet. Edward doesn't even try and help me now, but he slowly rises, too. I can feel his gaze resting on me. My throat begins closing as a tear falls. I wipe it away angrily, before spinning on unbalanced feet to face him.
"It was you!" I seethe, pointing my finger at him. He holds his hands out in front of him, a sign of surrender.
"Bella..." he says slowly, cautiously. "Let me explain."
A/N: So the... interactions begin. I'm not going to call it a frienship or a relationship or whatever yet, because their interactions are only just beginning. I've been so excited to get to this part because from here on out we have more of Edward and Bella together. I realise now that it's been fairly slow paced up 'till now, with hardly any B and E time at all. But this is how I wanted to have my story. It's how I planned it.
There are so many fast paced romances in the twi-fic universe, and as much as I love them - which is a LOT - I wanted this to be a little different. It is definitely a story that fits the friends-first trope, but I promise I plan for their relationship to advance to more eventually. You've just gotta stick with me for this story I have had, and am still having the pleasure of writing!
I'm slightly disappointed by the lack of reviews - though I am extremely grateful for the ones I have received up until now (thank you!) - but I am hoping that now more E and B interactions will be happening, that they will pick up some. If you don't want to leave a public review, then by all means, drop me a private message. I don't mind which.
Anyway, I really hope you enjoyed this chapter. I'll be back with the follow up to this cliffy (sorry not sorry) on Wednesday. See you all then!