Author's Note- Okay, so this is a relatively short update but I didn't really think it was right to combine this with the last chapter or the next one. This is just an update on Arizona and Cristina because I know I have been mostly focusing on Meredith, Derek, Mark, and Lexie. There are four "segments" of this chapter, divided with "MTB." The first part is from Arizona's POV, the second is Cristina's POV, the third is Arizona again and then Cristina last. Hopefully you guys aren't too confused lol. Enjoy!
Alex Karev was choosing to stick around Seattle until Arizona was out of the ICU and as much as she hated to admit it, this had been a pleasant surprise. Perhaps Arizona was not the sole reason; Karev had other friends that were recovering from the plane crash, too, such as Meredith and Cristina, but despite the way that Arizona had screamed at her former student, Karev was routinely checking in on her.
That was a nice gesture in a month that was otherwise, extremely depressing and miserable.
On Thursday, May 16th, thirty days had officially passed since their plane had fallen out of the sky. It seemed like much longer than that to Arizona, who had been unsuccessfully coping with indescribable pain ever since that day in April. She was out of the woods now, literally and figuratively but it was hard to say whether or not the hospital was better than being stranded in the middle of nowhere. The only real improvement was that there were not any bugs attempting to eat Arizona alive.
But Arizona was lonesome. Part of that was her own fault; she was not allowing many people to come visit her in the ICU. It was just Callie, Sofia, and sometimes Mark that were permitted to see her. Arizona's parents had gone home; they could not live in Seattle permanently and Arizona did not want her coworkers to witness her in this state. She would never be respected at Seattle Grace Hospital again. All anyone would be able to relate Arizona Robbins with was the poor, pitiful creature from the ICU.
As much as Arizona wished that was not the case, she knew that it was… no one had been able to look at Derek the same way after the shooting.
She had Callie, Sofia, and Mark, though, so that was something. And according to Owen, who had brought a bunch of people into Arizona's room earlier this week, there was going to be a major lawsuit regarding the plane crash. Arizona and the other victims could end up with some serious cash.
"I know you don't want to think about what happened anymore than necessary," Callie said when Arizona was initially reluctant to sue. "But that plane crashed for a reason and someone's responsible. No, it's not going to erase the memories but a million dollars wouldn't hurt, would it?"
So Arizona gave in, under the condition that Callie would be managing most of her paperwork. Arizona was already dealing with a broken femur and a raging infection that refused to subside; she did not want to take on the stress that came from a lawsuit, too.
Now, tomorrow, Arizona was going to have what would hopefully be her final surgery with Dr. Carlson, the best orthopedic surgeon at Seattle Grace, next to Callie. Once that was finished and Arizona started physical therapy, she would begin to put the stupid plane crash behind her. She would return to work, take back the pediatric department from Stark, and find a new, talented fellow to teach, someone better than Alex Karev.
In the meantime, Arizona was relaxing in her ICU room, dreaming about the day when she would stand next to an operating table again. It seemed so far away. That date was inching closer, though; Arizona had survived more than she ever thought possible and most of that was thanks to her perfect, sexy wife, Callie.
Callie, who was currently sitting next to Arizona, gabbing happily. "...I mean, he's made such amazing progress, physically. A month ago, I didn't know if either of you were still alive and now he's home, taking care of Sofia all by himself. I'm so proud of him."
"What about me? Are you proud of me?" Arizona teased.
"Oh, baby… you know I'm beyond proud of you but if you want me to say it again, I will," Callie smiled. "Arizona Noelle Robbins, you are the bravest person I know and I am so unbelievably proud of you."
Arizona giggled and leaned forward to kiss her wife, ignoring the constant pain in her femur. Soon, that would be gone.
Yet Callie pulled away, her face concerned. "Do you feel okay, baby? You're kind of warm."
"It's this infection. I'm convinced I'll never be cold again," Arizona said and threw aside one of her blankets. "Or maybe it's just my overall hotness."
It could not be anything too complicated; Callie was laughing and if there was reason to be concerned, Callie would not be capable of laughter. They kissed again and just then, the door to Arizona's room opened. The spawn of Satan himself, Alex Karev, peeked inside.
"Oh… sorry," he said when he saw the way that Arizona and Callie were kissing. "I just thought… well, I brought you a piece of Chunky-Stu's pizza. He's eating tonight, thanks to you… thanks to us."
Karev set the slice of Hawaiian pizza down on Arizona's bedside table. She glanced at it, but did not say anything.
"Anyway, since he's out of the woods, I'm out of here," Karev continued. "I'm going to Hopkins. I've really been busting my ass to make sure everything runs smoothly and now I'm… I'm done. So just… goodbye. I'm sorry this happened to you and I'm sorry it made you hate me."
Arizona pursed her lips. For the first time since the accident, she felt a bit of her anger subside. It was not her fault, but it was not really Karev's fault either… it was Hopkins, and he had worked hard to keep the pediatric surgical department under control this last month.
Arizona picked up the slice of Hawaiian pizza and held it back out to Karev. "I'm having surgery tomorrow."
"Your surgery's not till noon tomorrow; Carlson doesn't care if you eat now," Callie said.
"Well, I'm just gonna be an unbelievably good patient," Arizona said but she took the pizza back and handed it to her wife. "Here, you can have some of Chunky-Stu's pizza."
There was a slight smile on Arizona's face; she hoped that Karev would understand that as a truce because Arizona was not sure if she was a big enough person to forgive him out loud.
Suddenly, a sharp pain ripped through Arizona's chest. She was burning hot, lightheaded, and she tried to open her mouth to ask for help… all the air had been sucked out of Arizona's lungs…
Her eyes met Karev's, frightened and panicked, and then the world went black.
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Nearly one month had passed since the plane crash. That much, Cristina knew. She was starting to listen to what people had to say; she did not feel capable of responding, but Owen, Callie, and Meredith were keeping her updated on the world outside and Cristina was listening, whenever she heard them. She had an inclination that this was not 100 percent of the time.
But Cristina knew that almost a month had passed since the plane crash. She knew that Derek had been discharged from the hospital. Cristina was aware that Arizona's infection was improving, and that Meredith had begun therapy which, thus far, was not a success.
Above all, Cristina knew that the ICU nurses were getting sick of her. What used to be gossip had turned into full-fledged complaining. Cristina was a nutcase. She belonged in psych. Owen was advocating for her, saying that he was the Chief of Surgery and demanding that she be kept in the ICU, but that was a joke. Even Cristina knew that she was a behavioral health patient by now.
One day, late in the afternoon or early in the evening, Cristina heard the sliding door to her room open and close. She shut her eyes, anticipating more judgemental comments from the nurses. This time, though, Cristina was in luck… or at least, as fortunate as anyone could be inside a place like Seattle Grace Mercy Death. Owen had come to see her again and he was carrying a fresh bouquet of red roses.
"Hey… Cristina. Are you awake?" Owen's voice said; Cristina robotically turned her head in his direction. Owen smiled, thankful that she was responsive. "Hey! Guess what?"
Even if she did feel capable of talking, Cristina would not have answered. She hated guessing games.
Owen sat down and continued: "They're waking up Lexie… right now. Her brain swelling has gone down so they're waking her up to test her neurological function. Meredith's in there with her right now… Meredith and her dad, Lexie's dad, Thatcher… and Molly…"
That was good, Cristina guessed. As long as everything went according to plan, it sounded like all of the plane crash victims were going to survive… except for Jerry… Jerry had been eaten by wolves…
Eventually, Owen likely grew impatient, or maybe had had other patients to tend to, because he left. Cristina was alone again. She stared up at the ceiling, so exhausted, yet so tired of being in bed… she wondered if she was going to make it to her fellowship. That was what Cristina wanted, deep down, but she was trapped inside of Seattle Grace Mercy Death.
There was no saying whether or not Cristina would make it out alive…
It might have been five minutes, five hours, or five days later that Cristina snapped awake, angry beyond belief. She was sick of the judgemental nurses. She was sick of Seattle, as a whole. She heard someone tapping on her window; she looked up and realized that Krista, one of the worst ICU nurses was playfully knocking on the glass, gossiping with her friends about how Cristina was a hopeless case.
Cristina could not tolerate Krista's bullshit, not a moment longer. Her limbs free of restraints, Cristina lurched up into a sitting position, grabbed the vase of red roses that Owen had brought her, and hurled it at the window as hard as she possibly could.
There was a deafening, shattering noise. Krista screamed at the top of her lungs. Cristina lied back down and probably would have smiled if she were capable of that.
This time, only a few minutes passed before there was another visitor… or three visitors, actually. The door to Cristina's room opened and Owen, Krista, and one of the ICU physicians, Dr. Donner, rushed inside.
"I'm sorry, Hunt, but I'm out of options! She is a danger towards staff; she is a danger towards other patients and the ICU is supposed to be a safe place!" Donner hollered.
"I know! I… I know, it's under control," Owen said.
"It is not under control; she almost killed me!" Krista screeched.
"Yeah, look, Hunt… I'm sorry. I know she's your wife and I know you want to believe that she's coming back," Donner said. "But she's been catatonic for a month now. If it was any other patient, she would have been in psych a long time ago. You need to do what's best for her; you need to let her get the help she needs."
Cristina was unsure whether Owen agreed. The voices faded away and the next thing she knew, Owen was by her side again, alone. He was holding Cristina's hand, tears in his eyes.
"Cristina… Cristina, wake-up. Cristina, look at me… talk to me. I am begging you…"
There was such urgency in her husband's tone that Cristina automatically did as she was told. Well, she did not talk but she looked at him.
"There you go," Owen whispered. "Listen… Lexie didn't wake up like she was supposed to… there were complications. I… I know it's difficult but I'm just going to say it, okay? Lexie had a stroke. It was an intracerebral hemorrhage. Nelson fixed the bleed but… but it's not good. She has minimal brain activity. She might not ever wake up."
So much for Cristina's brief hope that all of the surgeons from the plane crash were going to survive… Cristina blinked. She felt like she was going to cry; she wanted to cry, yet her eyes would not formulate tears.
"Anyway… the Board is presenting me with an ultimatum. You're either going to have to get better fast, and… and go home with me, or else you're going to be committed to psych, against your will in the morning. They're gonna pump you full of antipsychotics and put you in group rooms with therapists and… and maybe that's what you need; I don't know. I just know that… if there's any chance that you might be able to do this without psych… Cristina, now is the time to say something. Do you understand me?"
Cristina understood what Owen was saying perfectly. It was not her neurological function that was damaged. Her brain had simply short-circuited from the trauma. What was she supposed to do now? Cristina wondered if she should accept the transfer to psych; it was a safe place, after all… or maybe she should go home with Owen and then get the hell out of Seattle as soon as the stars aligned.
Ultimately, Cristina was going to return to surgery. She knew that. It was not possible right now but this time, the trauma had not taken place in the operating room. This time, it was only surgery that was going to save Cristina from this nightmare and the sooner she was released from the hospital, the sooner she would be able to run away to the Mayo Clinic in Minnesota where there had never been a mass shooting, where their doctors were safe from plane crashes and bombs… where everything would be a distant memory.
She took a deep breath and then Cristina opened her mouth for the first time since being rescued from the forest. "I… I… I'll… go home."
Owen's jaw dropped; he clearly had not expected a response. "Really?! Cristina, you can hear me?! You understand?!"
"L-Lexie… had a… stroke. We're… g-going… home," Cristina repeated, slowly.
"Yeah… yeah, you have it exactly right. I'm so proud of you," Owen smiled. "Everything is going to be fine now, okay?! I promise… you're going to be fine. I love you so much."
Cristina knew it. She knew that Owen had cheated and that the plane had crashed and that nothing was ever going to be the same but beneath all of that, beneath the darkness and the trauma and confusion, Cristina knew that Owen loved her. And she reciprocated those feelings.
"I… I love you, too…"
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For the first time since April 18th, when Arizona woke up, she was not in pain. She was drowsy, the universe was foggy, but her leg was not aching and she had gotten what felt like a full night of sleep. Half of Arizona thought that she was dreaming so even when she technically became conscious, she kept her eyes shut, fell back asleep, and waited for reality to smack her in the face.
And then she wokeup again. Arizona opened her eyes and realized that somehow, she was not dreaming. The pain that had accompanied her for the past month was gone. She must have had her surgery with Carlson.
Arizona tried to sit up, but her body was not quite ready for that yet; she collapsed backwards onto her pillow. She looked around in both directions, desperate for something, someone with news, and found her gorgeous wife, Calliope, sitting to her left with tears streaming down her cheeks.
"C-Callie…" Arizona moaned and rubbed her eyes. "W-What happened? Are… w-what's wrong?"
Initially, there was no answer. Callie was either too upset or too relieved to speak so all she did was scoot forward and take Arizona's hand in her own. Then, there was a sharp intake of air, and Callie's soothing voice: "It's okay. You're okay. Everything's fine. You just got out of surgery."
"M-My… my leg is… is fixed? It… it doesn't… hurt," Arizona said.
"Yeah, um… yeah, you're okay now. Everything is going to be fine," Callie promised and regardless of her confusion, Arizona knew that she was not getting the full story.
"W-What happened?" she pressed.
Callie sighed; the tears were threatening to flow again. "Listen, baby… it's… it's Thursday night. You weren't supposed to have your surgery until Friday but… but something happened. Um… you… you went septic."
Septic… it was a word that was only supposed to be used to describe those rare, unfortunate ICU patients. That word was never intended to be used in relation to Arizona.
"W-What…?"
"You went septic," Callie said. "And… and your internal organs were failing. It's okay; we fixed it… but we had to get rid of the infection first. You were going to die… so, um… I'm so sorry but we had to take your leg. I'm so sorry."
It was a joke. It had to be a prank; there was no other plausible explanation. Callie had promised. She had given Arizona her word, numerous times, that they would find a way to fix the infection without amputation. Plus, even if something impossible had happened, there was no way that Callie would inform Arizona of the tragedy like that… not as soon as she wokeup from surgery… not without consulting Carlson.
Arizona stared back at her wife for so long that Callie eventually stood up. "Arizona? Baby? Talk to me, baby…"
"Help me sit up," Arizona said.
"Okay, um… just… okay, just… prepare yourself, okay?" Callie begged and then she pressed the buttons on the side of Arizona's bed that scooted her into an upright position.
Arizona looked down and what she saw stole the breath out of her chest. Her left leg was completely gone. In its place, was a short stump, wrapped in gauze. It was not a joke.
Arizona was never going to skate again…
"Baby…" Callie said for a third time and Arizona snapped.
"STOP CALLING ME THAT!"
Callie flinched backwards in surprise. "Arizona… listen, you were septic…"
"I DON'T CARE!" Arizona screamed. "You should have paged Carlson! He knew what he was doing; he had a plan!"
"Yeah, and I helped him make that plan…"
"YOU PROMISED! YOU PROMISED ME THAT YOU WEREN'T GOING TO LET THEM TAKE MY LEG!"
"Yeah, I know but I kinda figured that all went to hell when you were literally going to die!" Callie yelled back. "Arizona, we saved your life!"
"I DON'T CARE! YOU SHOULD HAVE LET ME DIE! YOU SHOULD HAVE DONE ANYTHING ELSE, EXCEPT FOR WHAT YOU DID! WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE, GOD?!"
There were running footsteps in the hallway and two nurses burst into the room, neither of which Arizona recognized in her fury. One had blonde hair, though, and it was the blonde that asked, "Dr. Robbins, what's wrong?"
"MY WIFE CUT OFF MY LEG; THAT'S WHAT'S WRONG!" Arizona sobbed; there were tears streaming from her own eyes now. She turned to Callie. "GET OUT! GET OUT, GET OUT OF MY ROOM!"
"Whoa… calm down. You have to hear me out…"
"No… YOU HAVE TO GET OUT OF MY ROOM! RIGHT NOW, GET OUT OF MY ROOM!"
"Er… come on, Dr. Torres. Let's give Dr. Robbins some space," the blonde nurse said and grabbed Callie by the arm.
Callie was shaking her head, exasperated, as if she was the one that had woken up without one of her limbs. "Hey… no, she's my wife!"
"I know but your wife needs some space and we need to get her pulse down," Nurse Blondie said. "Come on, Dr. Torres. You can come back later."
"NO, SHE CAN'T! SHE CAN'T COME BACK LATER! GET HER THE HELL AWAY FROM ME!"
Finally, Nurse Blondie and her partner managed to drag Callie out of the room but she was quickly replaced by three others… an unknown doctor and two nurses. The doctor was shouting orders that Arizona could not totally understand but she knew that the words push Alprazolam were included.
Arizona attempted to continue screaming. She tried to fight the doctor and anyone else who had been in on Callie's awful idea of a plan yet her surge of energy had left as soon as it had come… the pain, the loss, the shock slipped away and Arizona tumbled into a world where she had two legs, where she went running on her days off, where she skated down the hallways of Seattle Grace… where Karev had never accepted a fellowship at Hopkins… where the plane had never crashed…
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Cristina spent one more hour in the ICU. She did not reply to any of the nurses or doctors who tried communicating with her. That was stretching things. She did get out of bed to use the bathroom when asked and drank a cup of water on her own. According to the charge nurse, this was a massive improvement.
And then, at approximately 9:00 at night, Owen showed up with a new iPhone for Cristina and a simple outfit which consisted of black leggings, a blue t-shirt, and a matching, black set of underwear. He helped his wife dress herself and slipped her feet into comfortable, running shoes and before Cristina knew it, she was free.
She was perched in the front passenger seat of Owen's truck, being transported away from Seattle Grace Mercy Death. Cristina was never coming back.
"I'm going to cook a great dinner for you when we get home," Owen said. "When's the last time you ate anything?"
"Um…" Cristina did not respond. She knew that it had been before the plane crash. Cristina had been so hungry the entire time they were in the woods but once she was rescued, her appetite had vanished. Throughout her month-long hospitalization, Cristina was given nutrients intravenously.
"Well, it doesn't matter now. You're home with me," Owen said. "What do you feel like eating? You can pick anything in the world; if I don't know how to make it, then we'll order out… I'll send an intern to go pick it up and deliver…"
Cristina was still not particularly hungry so she did not engage in any conversation with Owen for the rest of the ride home and she did not speak until they were safe in their living room, away from society which was far too loud and anxiety-inducing.
Owen was in the kitchen, throwing together a meal of pasta and chicken when Cristina got up and hobbled after him, awkwardly. "I'm… I'm… dirty."
"They washed you in the ICU. They gave you bed baths," Owen said and paused from his cooking. "But yeah… I'm sure it would feel great to have a real shower, wouldn't it?"
"I'm… dirty," Cristina said.
"Okay… how about we eat first? You need to get some real food in your system… then I'll help you take a shower or a bath afterwards," Owen suggested.
Cristina was not hungry. Cristina was dirty… she knew that Owen's proposal made sense, though, so she nodded…
Somehow, Cristina did manage to eat more than she originally thought herself capable. The pasta that Owen had made was good and she slurped up the noodles with a bit of help from her husband. It was almost like Cristina had forgotten what proper food tasted like…
When they were finished, Owen gathered up their plates, took them to the sink, and then sat down next to Cristina. "Okay, listen… we're gonna go in the bathroom in a minute and… and wash you. But first, we need to talk about something else…"
"L-Lexie?" Cristina guessed.
"No… well, I guess Lexie is part of it," Owen said. "Tomorrow, I'm going to have to go up to the hospital… just for a little while. I've talked with some reps and I need to talk with everyone else who was involved in the plane crash and see what the plan is… do you understand?"
Cristina was following; she was not mentally-challenged. "We're… suing the… plane people?"
"As long as everyone agrees to it, yes… that's what I would suggest, if I were in your position. That plane crashed and we don't know why but we can find out. And I know I don't know everything that happened out there either but I know it was bad and I know someone should take the fall for it."
Owen was right about that… the time that Cristina had spent in the woods with her friends had not been a fun camping trip. "Yeah…"
"If you don't want to go, I understand; that's fine. I'll represent you," Owen continued. "But you were on the plane… you'll need to cast a vote so I need you to tell me what you want to do."
"I don't know," Cristina said. "I mean… I'm fine with doing whatever everyone else wants to do."
"I… okay," Owen sighed. "Okay, then I'm going to vote for the lawsuit. Like I said, I… I don't know what happened out there but I know it was bad and I believe you should get some sort of justice. Is that okay?"
For some reason, Cristina had a gut feeling that it was not the fault of Bayview Aeronautics at all. Obviously, something mechanical had gone wrong, but it was probably just a freak accident. The plane was cursed by Seattle Grace Mercy Death. Terrible things happened there…
Someone needed to pay, though. No one truly paid during the shooting because Gary Clark had killed himself after finishing his rampage. Lexie was nearly dead… Meredith, Derek, and Arizona had almost died… something needed to change, even if Seattle Grace Mercy Death was the setting of another tragedy tomorrow.
"That's… okay," Cristina agreed.
"Okay, good. That's good to hear. Let's get you in the tub now, okay?"
A bath was easier to maneuver than the shower, especially considering the fact that Cristina was unsteady on her feet. Owen assisted his wife in stripping off her clothes and climbing into the tub; he even washed her hair and shaved her legs.
"You're doing great. You're doing so great; I'm so proud of you," Owen said as he poured warm water over Cristina's shoulders. "Does that feel okay?"
Cristina was sitting upright, staring at the wall which was beginning to morph into the crumpled wreckage of an airplane…
"Look, um… I'm gonna take a leave of absence," Owen said. "I think three years ago I said I was gonna figure out how to make a great roast chicken… still haven't done it. I just love how a house smells when there's a chicken in the oven."
Cristina needed to leave. She needed to run away. She could not let Owen put his career on hold for her when the only thing Cristina needed was to get away…
Owen sighed. "You're gonna feel stronger in a couple of days or weeks… it takes as long as it takes and we have all the time in the world. When you're back on your feet, you'll go back to work at whatever pace you want. You'll go back into the OR and you can do your magic. You won't have to deal with patients or families. I'll take care of all of that."
There was a pause. Cristina was inching further and further away from this scene in the bathroom. Owen kissed her on top of the head. "Okay, are you ready to get out now?"
"I can't," Cristina said.
"What?"
"I can't get out…"
"You can," Owen insisted. "I… I'll help you."
Suddenly, the walls, the plaster broke down. Cristina had been mute for the past month and she could not hide her emotions any longer. "I stayed awake for four days… I remember every single minute of those four days. The fire went out. It was really, really dark. There were so many stars…"
"Oh, God," Owen whispered.
"I remember getting the bugs out of Arizona's leg. I put leaves on it, trying to keep them out," Cristina confessed. "And Lexie… Lexie just kept dying. It was so annoying. I kept trying to help her but she just kept trying to die on me. I just wanted to sleep… Meredith was asleep. Everyone was asleep…
"Lexie and Derek got the last of the water… and I remember drinking something bad. It might have been the fuel from the plane… I… I drank my pee.
"The noises… the animal noises fighting and growling right next to us, right there. I kept waiting for them to come and kill me but they didn't… and then I realized… they could smell the blood. They wanted Lexie… and… Derek and Arizona… Meredith and I… we tried to keep them away… we tried… we gave them… Jerry's body… but we couldn't… get out. I can't… get out."
Owen was stationary, frozen throughout Cristina's speech. As she came to her conclusion, he shook his head. "You're out now. I've got you."
It was not like that. She wished it was, but it was not possible… Cristina watched as the plane wreckage turned back into walls and then into blood stained tiles, littered with bullet holes. Meredith was screaming for Cristina to save McDreamy, to save her husband. Mark was carrying an unconscious Meredith through the forest.
"I'll… I'll never get out."
Yes, Arizona lost her leg :( I just didn't think it was realistic to do anything else considering that she had an open fracture in the woods for four days. Plus I'm interested to figure out how her recovery will be different with Mark still alive and in the picture! And Cristina is out of the hospital, too, but as you can probably see, she still has a ways to go in terms of her trauma recovery… like everyone.
Don't worry, we'll get back to the MerDer and Slexie content soon! I may not even continue doing regular updates on Arizona and Cristina throughout this whole story; this was just an important update because it will affect lots of different characters! Please don't forget to review; reviews mean SO much to me and if you would like, please let me know if you want continuing updates on Arizona and Cristina or if you want me to just stick with MerDer and Slexie.
Thank you so much for reading! Love you all. Xoxo, merderpedia :)