It's always going to be you, isn't it?
LoveFromOQ Valentine One-Shot.
Hello everyone! I know it's been a while, but here's my #LoveFromOQ Valentine one shot for Julia, regal_artist ! :)
Hope you end up liking this one shot, it is a bit fast so if there's any scene or moment you'd like to read, i'm always ready to take prompts from anyone.
Have a great valentine's day everyone, may this day be filled with love and support all around you!
Thank you for taking the time to read this, thank you in advance to anyone who feel like leaving a review, you guys are real rockstars.
.::.
She couldn't believe she had let her sister drag her back here.
This little holiday station far from the city she grew up at, where her fondest memories were made but also some of the worst.
She hadn't ever wanted to come back, too proud, too scared to face it all… yet all it took was her company struggling and some sweet words from her step sister and there she was, getting off the plane and being greeted by her dad.
He looked okay.
The first night happened in a blur, between getting home, unpacking and getting everything in order for her holidays, assuring that she could take a real break from work. (Which would last about 2 days, based on past experience.)
With how tired she was, she decided to go to sleep early, blocking away as many memories that came rushing back as she could.
.::.
Regina was definitely not a morning person.
When she went down that morning and learned that her dad sold the coffee machine to force himself to go out and socialise a bit everyday she definitely felt like she was somehow being tested.
Trying to be understanding, she just decided to get her coat and leave earlier to go to a coffee shop nearby.
She quickly think how this used to be the place but gets caughts up reading a text as she enters, doesn't pay much attention until she raises her head and realises that it is, indeed, the place.
And then she sees who's working at the bar.
Alone.
It's so sad.
When life throws you past back on your face at the moment you expect it less.
Robin.
Robin fucking Locksley.
Robin-love-of-her-fucking-life Locksley.
He was back and no one had found the decency to let her know. Which, really, she should definitely strangle Tink for that. And she will. She definitely will. First she just has to get through this fucking awkward moment where she has to order coffee from the guy she used to be so desperately and incredibly in love with.
It's almost her turn and she's freaking out. Has half a mind to just turn around and leave. But as she gets ready to do just that the person in front of her gets done, and great, now it's her turn.
"Regina?" His voice barely changed. It's a bit rougher, one can hear he's now older, but there's a great sense of familiarity and home she could recognise anywhere. She almost gets lost into staring at him when he says her name again. "Regina, is... is that you?"
RIght. She should answer, shouldn't she? "Robin... Hi! Uhm, yeah, it's me." she chuckles. She almost groans at herself, how come she's still acting that way towards him years after they broke up.
He smiles, a shy but adorable thing but she can still see his dimples.
She used to have a thing for them. "You're back."
"I am." she says, smiling awkwardly. "My uh... my dad asked me to come. I haven't been there in a few years and... the company i own is not doing well so i thought going back to my roots would help getting that... spark, back."
"That sounds like a challenge. And if you're anything like the girl you used to be i'm sure it's one you can take on." He's looking away as he says that, preparing the previous customer's order, so he misses the smile she gives him in return.
"Thanks.." she says softly. She's not really sure what else to say, but she doesn't really want the moment to end so she asks, "how are you? You work here?"
"I actually own the place." Shock must be seen on her face as he almost immediately chuckles and adds, "yes, i know i did swear i would never be caught trapped here but my parents were not able to keep on going and i just... i couldn't see this place belong to someone else."
She nods, totally understand it. When they used to date, he kept talking about how this place felt like home and how most of his most incredible memories happened there.
They had their first kiss there.
She shouldn't be thinking about that, this is old history.
Thank god, her half sister Mary texted her telling her that her and her son Neal were on their way. Probably saving her from further embarassement.
"Sorry uh, that... that's Mary she's on her way…" She says, while quickly typing an answer.
"No problem, » he tells her. « i guess i'll see you around?"
"Probably." this time she's looking at him, she can see his smile and she can see how good he looks now. She needs to stop. "Well, Happy Holidays Robin." She says.
She doesn't give him the time to answer, just turns around and leave.
.::.
When she leaves the coffee shop, she feels like she's in a haze, some sort of trans.
She keeps thinking about their history… it's a sad one, for sure.
They met there, at the coffee shop.
Young her used to be very adventurous and carefree but she also was raised by Cora Mills of all people. Which meant that she was used to screwing up however she was also used to her mother being very difficult each time she did. One day, she screwed up and she knew her mother's wrath would be an intense one. It's been 20 years now, so she's not entirely sure what she did that day, probably skipped school again.
Instead of going home, she decided to stop at the coffee shop, desperate to steal time and keep that happy/giddy feeling she was feeling. Robin was there, was helping his dad in his mom's absence as she had to go out of town for a few days and he talked to her. Ever since, they've almost been glued together and oddly, lifted each other up days after days.
It only took them about 2 years to confess their feelings towards each other and start dating.
Needless to say, Cora wasn't a fan when she found out.
At the time, Regina thought it didn't matter, nothing could come between them… until it did.
She was still lost in her thoughts when she heard the sound of her step sister, Mary Margaret and her son, Neal.
She pushed the past further back in her head and embraced them.
She usually wasn't the typical hugger person but something about coming back here made her feel like she was 15 years old all over again.
"so how was the trip?" Asked her step sister as she was hugging Neal.
"Great, it feels… weirdly good being back here."
She tried. She really tried not looking back towards the Coffee Shop but she couldn't really help it.
That's when she saw Tink cross the street and join them, well, more like crashed into them forcing them in a tight embrace.
Regina had to admit, she was still mad at her for not telling her Robin was now owning the coffee shop but seeing the crew almost completely back together… it felt good. Really good.
Speaking of which… "Where's Mal?" She asked the moment Tink calmed down her excitement enough to actually say more than "hi!" "i missed you guys!" "oh my god!"
Mary answered, "She'll join us later, she has to finish up on some work."
The look on her face told Regina everything she needed to know.
Mal wasn't working, she was avoiding her. Still, she nodded, trying to keep the disappointment off her face.
True, they had actually left each other in quite a bad place last time they saw each other but they were adults now and they could get over it. They could. Besides, she missed her and she was hoping her former best friend felt the same way.
But she didn't want to ruin the mood and the others knew something was off between them they just didn't really know what, so she decided to drop the subject.
They caught up a bit as they walked to Mary's place, she was happy to hear that her step sister was finally engaged to the man she's been dating for the past 5 years and was still loving her job as a teacher. Tink on her hand, was… Tink. Enjoying her life in this place like a happy butterfly.
As they reached Mary's placed, Neal almost immediately went running in his room and Regina took the opportunity to ask Tink what she's been dying to since she saw her when her step sister offered them coffee. "So, is there anything any of you want to tell me? I don't know, maybe where to not get my coffee in the morning?"
Their eyes widened. They both knew. Great.
"You too?!" Regina said to her sister, "i had feeling Tink conveniently forgot to tell me, but you?!"
"I'm sorry.." blurted Mary straight away.
How great, she thought, sighing. "Can you two tell me why you didn't even warn me no to go to the coffee shop my ex owns?" Well at least they looked guilty.
"It was my idea." Admitted Tink, finally sitting down right next to her. "I thought.. i just thought if you knew you would never had gone there and never knew what he became, you wouldn't have seen him again.."
"And what on earth made you think i wanted to see him again?" She asked, trying to keep her anger because deep down she knew, she knew Tink was right and she had actually been wondering about Robin almost everyday since the last time they saw each other.
"Regina…" No. No she wasn't going to sit here and listen to her sappy friend go on about her second chances obsession and how it was made to be and all this bullshit.
"No." She said, as firmly as she could, even though she could feel her throat tighten. "No Tink, i broke his heart back then, there's no way he'll forgive me." She thought she had made peace with her decision long ago but actually saying it out loud was breaking her heart more than she thought it would. Before she broke, she quickly added, "Either way, the past belongs to the past and Robin and i are history, now i'm sorry Mary but i think i'm going to go home i'm not really in the mood for small talks anymore."
Both Mary and Tink nodded, said goodbye and she left.
She was probably overreacting but fact was ever since she broke up with Robin she had been fighting the urge to call him, tell him she was being stupid and it was all a mistake, begging for him to forgive her and come back. With time, that feeling became something she was used to live with, like a wound that never fully heals. The only problem was that now that she had seen him again, it felt like that wound she thought was healed was actually spread open and tearing her apart from the inside.
As she walks back to her cottage and she thinks of the big mistake she made last time she was there, she realises.. she's probably going to hate herself for this for the rest of her life.
.::.
The next day, she decided she should probably talk to Robin again at some point.
She had spent the entire night tossing and turning in her bed, and she came to the conclusion that he deserved to know the truth. No matter how infuriating it was, she kept thinking about what Tink implied. What if there was a way they could still have a chance? Worst case scenario either way, they would go on separate ways and never speak to each other again. She still had to do this. The few years they spent together were probably the happiest of her life and their relationship had meant so much to her… still does.
If she had to be honest with herself, seeing him again made her realise… She still had feelings for him. It wasn't just the whispers of memories who wouldn't go away, it was real strong feelings that she tried to ignore because she thought she had no chance to ever make things right with him.
But now she did and she decided. She was going to tell him everything and then hopefully, with time, he'd been willing to give her, to give them, another shot.
She got up and got dressed quickly, though she would lie if she said she didn't double check her look in the mirror to make sure she looked okay and went downstairs, prepared to get breakfast started when to her surprise, everything was already done and ready. She found her dad sitting there, reading the paper, obviously waiting for her.
Her heart melted. "Daddy… you didn't have to do all this." She said, hugging him.
"It's the first morning i'm spending with my daughter in about 15 years, i absolutely should have." He answered with a smile.
They caught up on each other's life, not in a rush to move, just enjoying being both there again. She was surprised to learn that her father had started gardening a bit outside the cottage. Nothing really fancy, but as of now he was spending most of his time here, it was something he loved doing and that was keeping him busy.
Regina told him about the issue with the company and how she was trying to find a way to save it though it probably wasn't going to be easy. He offered a few top of his mind suggestion, unfortunately she had already thought of those but it would be too complicated.
When they were done, they cleaned up the dishes together like they used to do and Regina decided it was probably time she'd go try and talk to Robin.
However before that, she had someone else to go talk to, speaking of fixing past mistakes.
.::.
On the way to her place, she thought about calling a hundred times, she also thought about turning back she thought about the words she would say, the explanation she was going to give.
Until she got there.
Sat in her car, she felt like her mind went completely blank, frozen.
What if she didn't accept to open her door? What if their friendship had been screwed up beyond repair? No. There had to be something she could do. If she had known when she got there she would be facing the two biggest mistakes of her life in two days, she probably wouldn't have come back at all.
That is what gave her the push she needed.
She was not the same scared, "good" girl hiding behind her mother anymore.
The day she cut her off her life was the day she said goodbye to that part of her and it made her realise the mistakes she did. It all started the day she got home after a date with Robin later than she had planned. They had got lost into the moment and when she got home, her mother was waiting for her. Usually, Cora would yell, yell and rage and express how disappointed she was.
This time she hadn't.
It made it scarier.
Her mother told her she knew about her relationship and she knew about the friends she was lying to spend time with. Regina hadn't done it a lot, and she wasn't in any way proud of it but her mother was really tough back then when it came to studies and curfew and truth to be told, she just wanted to be a teenager and have some fun. So sometimes, she used to say she was going to study at the library and instead of going there she would hang out to the coffeeshop with Robin and Mal.
These three were inseparable.
They had been through it all together.
Robin and Regina's romance, ups and downs, Mal's coming out, her first girlfriend, Robin's dad's death, Regina's struggle with her abusing mother… everything.
These moments made her the happiest she had been in a long while so obviously when Cora found out she gave her a choice.
She needed to stop seeing them, plain and simple, break all ties with them or else her mother would ruin her reputation and future, so Regina did what she thought she had to do, she broke up with Robin, fought with Mal and left town without much more than a goodbye.
Today she knew this was wrong, she knew they deserved better than being throwed away for selfish reasons and above all else they deserved the truth. She can't erase the past but she can try to make things right.
So here she was now, in front of Mal's cottage.
She took a deep breath, her heart pounding.
She knocked.
It took a few seconds but then the door opened, and sure enough here she was. Anyone watching the scene would be fooled and see nothing more than a neutral face on Mal's face, like she couldn't care less and was about to close the door at her face… but Regina wasn't anyone. Mal was her best friend, and what she saw was different. She saw Mal freezing, surprised to see her. Emotional, but frustrated about it. Trying to look strong, but feeling oh so much.
They were more alike than people knew.
"I didn't think you would show up." she simply said, once the initial surprise wore off.
"I didn't think i would either." That was the truth.
When she initially accepted to come back here, she was decided to pretend like they both elsewhere but something about seeing Robin again changed that. "Can i… come in?", she asked, hesitating.
Mal took a breath, looked her over from head to toe, sighed. To Regina it felt like it took an entire 10 minutes when it only took a few seconds for Mal to step aside and open the door. She felt relieved, this had to mean something, right? Maybe she didn't hate her after all.
"I'm sorry i came unannounced.", slowly she started taking off her blazer, checking Mal's face for any sign of discomfort or sign that she was imposing. "I just thought if i called…"
"I wouldn't have let you in? " Said Mal, interrupting her, "you can hang your jacket there ", she added, gesturing to her left as she walked further to her kitchen. "Want some coffee?"
Regina smiled softly. Even though Mal was still mad at her she still offered her coffee, that was definitely a sign that things were going good. "Alright, but just one, i have to go to the coffee shop later." she answered, making Mal smile softly and nod, understanding.
Once the jacket was hanged she followed Mal to the kitchen, they stayed silent as Mal turned on the coffee machine and got two cups out. It's only when she pressed the button that she spoke. "Truthfully Regina, i don't know what i would have done if you had called first." When she turned around, it broke Regina's heart to see her mask slipping away for a bit and see some pain and anger. "I'm still… so mad at you. You that last day when we started fighting… i thought it was just another fight. I thought it was just us being stupid because we were tired and in a mood but then…" Regina realised how genuine she was being when she saw her take a shaky breath. There was only a handful of times she saw her best friend being so open and vulnerable. "Then i woke up the next morning to a text saying you were transferring to another college in another town, that you thought it would be better for us to go on separate paths and moved on but that you wished me the best…" Hearing these words, the brunette looked down, ashamed and cringing. She really did screw up, didn't she? "So imagine my surprise when 15 years without a word you just show up on my doorstep."
Right. She deserved that one.
"I know," she answered, "i know i screwed up. The reason i came here was to… apologise and explain myself. I thought you deserved it."
"15 years later?" Said Mal, raising an eyebrow at her, crossing her arms on her chest and leaning on her counter.
Chuckling dryly, Regina went next to her, leaning in as well. "I'm not going to lie, i did not come here with the intention to do it."
A flash of hurt went through Mal's eyes though she did seem to appreciate the honesty. What changed your mind?"
"Robin." she simply added.
Mal chuckled, turned around to get their coffees. "I should've guessed, it's always going to be him isn't it?"
What was she supposed to answer to that? That for the past 15 years she had been unable to get in a committed relationship because she broke the heart of the one man she ever truly loved? That she had convinced herself that it would be okay, that she could just learn to live with it and still be content? Instead she just took her coffee and sat down at the table, quickly joined by Mal. Old habits die hard.
"I just… you guys meant the world to me, those years were probably the best of my life and i couldn't stop thinking… you deserved better than what i did and you deserved to know the whole story."
"Why, so we can cry about how what you did was really okay, forgive you and pretend like it never happened?" Yeah, she deserved that one as well.
"More like because i screwed up but i cared…" still do, she thought as she was speaking, "about you guys and if there's any chance you could ever forgive me… i want to make things right first."
It seemed like she was convincing enough because Mal just nodded and listened. They talked for about 2 hours, first about everything that happened and when they agreed to leave the past behind and try to reconnect, they caught up on each others lives, Mal was now engaged to a woman she'd been dating for the past 3 years named Ruby and she was doing good at her job.
She truly was happy for her.
When they were done they decided to take things slow and come back into each other's lives, they both knew there was still work to be done but both of them were willing to do it.
.::.
Relieved that at least part of her mistake was… on the right path, per say, Regina went to the coffee shop to talk to Robin.
Now that part would be trickier.
Mal and Regina were very much alike and both dealt with abusing mothers so Mal had been willing to understand the stupid decisions she made when she was younger. She could tell she wasn't fully forgiven yet, but at least Mal was willing to try.
Robin and her had always been different.
They were different, but on some levels they completed each other and still found common ground, however dealing with her mother had never been one of them.
He was always heartbroken for her and frustrated that she never stood up to her which forced them to hide and never truly being a couple outside of the walls of the coffeeshop which in those days became their safe place.
Regina certainly knew that Robin wouldn't be as accepting of her reasons as Mal had been which terrified her but on the other hand, he had acted… so… normal with her when they saw each other, almost made her believe he forgave her. She shouldn't let herself think of this. Last time she saw him was the time she broke up with him and told him she wasn't happy with him anymore, probably the biggest lie she'd ever said.
When she got there she was surprised to see him close already, but quickly took her purse and left the car, trying to catch him before he left.
In her hurry she didn't pay as much attention as she should have and bumped into him. "I'm so sorry!" she quickly said, her heart beating faster.
"It's okay," he answered "i didn't really pay attention either."
They both smiled. "You're closing already? It's earlier than i remember…"
"Yeah," he nodded, "I noticed tuesdays were really slow in the afternoon and i could really use some time off." When he saw the mildly concerned look on her face, he added "i'm okay it's just… holidays means more people so more intensity is all."
"Right." She said. "I -uh… i came to talk to you, if you have a few moments to spare?" Seeing the hesitation in his eyes felt like someone was crushing her heart, but she felt relief that he actually accepted.
"I was on my way to the barn, check on the horses, want to come with me? We can talk there?"
She quickly accepted.
The ride there was quick and somehow tense. She kept trying to find the right words, trying to find how to get to talk with him, trying to figure out if she had a chance at being forgiven or not based on the interactions they had so far; She could only assume he was wondering what the hell she wanted to talk to him about and just like Mal, he was probably also wondering why she was doing this now. Neither of them spoke a word but she couldn't help but staring. He had changed since she last saw him. Went from the small town blond boy, thin and sweet to this handsome blue-eyed man. They say a man gets more handsome with age, they weren't lying.
She also tried distracting herself, that didn't work.
.::.
Soon enough they got there, she felt giddy when she saw the horses. She used to love spending time here with him, learning about them, about riding and getting to know a world her mother would hate to see her be a part of.
She was surprised when he told her that one of horses, the oldest one, had died a few years before but not before she gave birth to a beautiful baby, which meant they now had two fully grown horses and a baby to take care of, they were truly sweet.
They quickly fed them, petting them a bit on the way.
When she left the last box, Regina's eyes fell on a small drawing on the wall.
Se remembered that drawing. She made it. It was probably the cheesiest most cliché drawing a girl could ever make in her life, but she remembered them making out against that wall and then to break the tension a bit, she took her sharpy and drew a heart on the wall with written « R+R. » in it. At the time, it made them smile. Possibilities and plans for the future filling their minds.
But all that went away.
Because of her.
She quickly got out of the barn, suddenly feeling out of breath.
She leaned against the wall and closed her eyes. How could she have been so stupid?
She heard him call her name and knew he was on his way to join her and check on her, that's how much of a good man he truly was. She debated leaving, again, hiding away from all these feelings that felt too big for her body and too strong to fight the moment he came next to her and asked her what was wrong, she knew she couldn't. He deserved the whole story just as much if not more than Mal did. He used to be her rock, her confident, her biggest supporter… He deserved to know the real reason why she had to leave him and why she had made the biggest mistake of her life this far.
"I think we should talk." She just said, after all, he had agreed to it.
"Do we have to?" He asked, "I mean we were having a cool time and i'm just… i'm glad to see you again."
Her treacherous heart started beating faster again. Why wasn't he mad at her? Why didn't he hate her? She didn't actually know if it would make the conversation easier but at least that would be something she expected.
"I'm glad to see you as well." She said, whispering. Not fully trusting her voice at the moment.
And then she hugged him.
She probably shouldn't have, not with their situation and he probably let it last longer than would be normal given the circumstances but then he pulled away, a confused look on his face and she put her forehead against his, breathing in.
"Regina, what's going on?" That was it. She was about to tell him everything. No more excuses.
She pulled away as well, holding herself took a shaky breath in. "I loved you." She said. There. Simple. Easy.
He froze. Trying to determine if she was being serious. "You… But then… I don't understand."
She looked away, couldn't stand looking at him and his confused face. God, was she really that convincing? "Back then… When we-... When i broke up with you i told you i didn't love you anymore and i wasn't happy with you. I lied."
When she dared to look at him she could see on his face how unsure he was about trusting her. She could see the pain, confusion and surprise on his face. With a shaky breath he whispered, "Why?"
Not really sure which words will be best, she realised that no matter which words she used, he would still be hurt so she figured it didn't really matter. "My Mother."
"Your mother?" This time his voice was a bit louder, filled with confusion and anger.
"Yes." She said, taking a breath. "About a week before… i broke up with you she found out about us, i'm not sure how she said something about driving in the neighbourhood looking for a horse to buy for me," she chuckled, "but we both know that isn't true. She saw us. Kissing. Hanging out with Mal and her girlfriend."
The next few seconds felt like hours, tension heavy between them. She was terrified, she wanted so badly to have a chance to have him back in her life at least as a friend and here he was, looking at her, breathing in and out trying to make sense of it all.
"She threatened you." He simply said after a few seconds.
"Not physically. Never physically." She quickly said, that was something he was always scared of back then, that Cora's emotional manipulation would turn into something more. "She threatened to ruin my career and life there if i didn't…" She stopped to take a deep breath. Feeling her throat closing up and the burn of unshed tears at her eyes. "She manipulated me into thinking i could lose it all by not doing what she wanted and back then i was so... foolish," she darkly chuckled at her past self stupidity, this time not able to hold back tears as a few started falling down her cheeks. "I believed her. But i did love you and i still-.." No. No she wasn't going down that road. Not now. So she corrected herself. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry for hurting you, i never meant for it to happen and i know you might never forgive me for this, for lying to you. But you have to know the truth, you have to know i truly am sorry."
Robin stood there.
Stunned to silence, looking at her with a thousand emotions spiraling in his eyes.
"Each time i felt like i could potentially go out with someone, i would start thinking about how i failed at making my first love happy." He simply said and his words felt like a knife stabbing her right in the heart.
By lying to him, she had ruined probably his a good part of his life.
He sighed, "i know… i know it's not your fault you were 17 and she was your mother but i just… I need to go." He turned around, took a few step before she could react.
"Robin, wait!" She went after him, catching his arm and stopping him. She took the paper from her pocket and put it in his hand before saying, "This is… a letter i wrote to you about a week after i left you. You're… you're mad at me now, rightfully so but will you… can you read it? At some point? I'm not… You don't need to say or do anything else in return it's just, i promised myself when i wrote it that if i ever saw you again i would give it to you."
He just nodded and left.
With the letter in his hand and Regina's heart with him.
.::.
It took a week for Robin to read the letter.
He wanted to get a chance to calm down and process everything before he did to fully understand what she was saying.
Rationally he knew that it wasn't her fault and that her mother was a master in manipulation but god damn it hurt. For the past 15 years he thought himself as not capable of making someone happy and though he was getting better, he never could get Regina out of his mind. The worst part was when he saw her again in his coffee shop last week he realised that maybe the reason he couldn't get her out of his mind was because he was still in love with her.
And then she went and told him everything.
He took a deep breath and sat on his bed, deciding that now that he was calming down, it might be a good time to read it.
« Dear Robin,
I have no idea what i am doing as there is such high chances that you will never see this but i'm thinking… i should probably tell you the truth, somehow. If we ever see each other again, you'll read this so please.. bear with me.
We broke up about a week ago and ever since i have felt like a piece of my heart was left with you in that coffee shop.
Because i love you Robin of Locksley, i lied, big lie, i love you.
The only reason this happened is my mother, she forced me to chose a life without yu to preserve my future and to protect both you and mal and if you're reading this i most likely already explained it all to you already.
You're probably never going to want to speak or hear from me ever again so i'm using his letter to just… thank you.
Yesterday, i decided that i'm moving out. I'm cutting ties with her and choosing a better life for myself and it's all because of you. You taught me that everything she's done to me isn't right, it's not something i should be going through and it most certainly isn't love. You taught me what real love is. It was a short 2 years, but i promise you that i will never forget you, forget us.
I hope someday you will find it in your heart to forgive me, forgive me for breaking your heart and lying to you. But also just know that even if you never do, it's okay, and i'm grateful for everything we shared together, everything you brought into my life and all the memories we made. I will cherish them forever.
Regina. »
When Robin dropped the letter on the bed, a tear fell down his cheek.
He took a paper, a pen and started writing.
.::.
Two weeks. She hear from Robin in two weeks now and her mind was racing.
How was he? Did he think about what she told him? Did he read the letter? What did he think about it?
She thought he had because about a week ago, she started finding flowers to her window, that used to be their thing. Back when they were hiding they wanted to have something to remind each other that even though they were not together, their minds were. He had started putting flowers by her window and did for about a year until the day they broke up. The pain she had felt when she didn't find them that next morning was a pain she hoped she would never have to go through again.
Now they were back.
She wasn't sure if it was from him, but it had to be, right?
No one that she knew of was aware of their little tradition, so it could only be him.
Though she wasn't really sure if this was a good thing or not because he hadn't tried speaking to her yet, and while the flowers were sweet she wanted him permanently back in her life, not just in the form of flowers by her window.
She was getting antsy.
Her plane back for New York would be the next day, she wasn't sure if he knew that but their time was running out. She should have left ways to contact them, now it might be too late to fix it.
"Hello moon, earth talking, hope you have a great view from wherever you are." Sarcastically said Mal, bringing her back to the moment at hand.
"Sorry," she answered, shaking her head. "I was just thinking... "
"About what?" asked Mal
"Robin." She sighed, she really did sound desperate. "He hates me."
"That man couldn't hate you even if he tried." Said Mal, rolling her eyes back.
"It's been two weeks Mal…" Putting her head between her hands she closed her eyes, trying to think of reasons to believe he would come around.
"Yeah well he's slow, we know that." Smiled the blonde. "But when you left it felt like his world crumbled." She smiled when she saw Regina's guilty face, "I'm sorry but… it's the truth Regina. These kind of feelings don't just go away, he was kind to you until you told him right?"
"I guess." mumbled Regina, understanding what she meant even though she didn't like it. "He also…" She second guessed herself. Did she really want to tell her that? Well yes. She did. "Back then when we were together and were hiding from Cora he used to put flowers every morning by my window." They both chuckled.
"You were disgustingly sweet." commented Mal, rolling her eyes.
"Yeah," added Regina, smiling fondly at the memory. "And for the past week i've found flowers there as well." She could tell her friend was surprised, but in a good way.
"Proves my point." she just said, taking a sip of her coffee. Regina groaned.
"I don't know what to do, i need to go back to New York at some point the holidays are almost over and it's where i belong. But.."
"But you want to wait. For him." Interrupted Mal. Regina just nodded. "You shouldn't, you're your own person before anything else and as romantic as you staying would be, i'm not sure that's the best decision for you."
"Why do you always say things that i don't like?" complained Regina.
"Because you need to hear them." And that she did, which is why that same evening she started packing.
.::.
It was Mal who told him;
After Regina left, they had stayed in touch and he knew the two of them had become friends again. He was happy for them. He was.
He was just not sure where he stood.
He still loved Regina, seeing her again had made that crystal clear and he wasn't sure there was anything he could do about it. On the other hand though, he was mad at her. He was mad that she felt like she had to lie to him instead of telling him the truth, he was mad that the blow his self confidence took when she broke up with him was all for nothing. He was mad that it took her 15 years to come back and tell him the truth.
But he was also so in love with her.
Every day he woke up at down to put the flowers by her window, the same way he used to do when they were together. He knew she had noticed as each day there was room for the new ones made. She was probably really confused, and truth to be told he wasn't entirely sure of what it meant either.
One thing he could confess to himself at least was that he wanted her back in his life, in what capacity that still needed to be determined but he didn't want to be completely separated from her. He was coming to that conclusion, just getting home from bringing the flowers when he got a text from Mal.
« Flowers? Smooth move, Romeo. ;) Might want to step up your game, she's leaving this afternoon. »
He froze.
No.
No way.
No way in hell he was losing her again.
He might still be mad and not sure as to where he stood regarding their relationship, there was no way he would ever want to have her disappear on him again.
With that in mind, he quickly texted Mal that he was on his way to the airport and called for a cab.
.::.
When she reached the airport she feels sad.
She felt like everything is happening too fast for her to catch up, like the world keeps turning and she's not moving. She probably shouldn't have come back, she's grateful she did, grateful she had the opportunity to at least make things a bit right for them and got to have Mal's friendship back.
Things were going well for them, they had hanged out quite a bit for the past two weeks and promised to see each other again very soon.
The only problem now was that she was didn't know what Robin was feeling and it made her anxious. So she decided she was not going to push it, she was going to leave, just like she planned and maybe she would come back next year. Saying goodbye to her dad that morning had been tough, more than she thought it would be and she already missed him.
Also seeing Mary and her family, Tink, and all these other people she grew up with was a blessing and it made her feel a warmth and happiness she hadn't fully felt in a long time, so yes, she would definitely come back next year.
But she had to go back home, she had to save her company and she had to go back to her life, which granted was going to change a bit but it was still her life either way. So no matter what Robin felt, she would go back. And besides, if he truly wanted to, he could easily find a way to get in touch with her.
Her plane was leaving soon.
She took a deep breath, stood up, ready for the next chapter of her life…
Until she heard it.
"Regina!" No. There was no way… no, she had probably imagined it.
She started taking a few steps, but then she heard it again.
"Regina wait!"
Now she definitely didn't imagine that. It was him. He was there.
She didn't date turning around straight away.
But when she did a few seconds later, here he was. Running.
Running towards her.
"Robin?" She asked, her voice shaking, obviously nervous.
"I've read your later, last week." He said out of breath when he reached her. "And i realised, i don't want to lose you."
"But what about -"
"Us? I know we're not… the best we've been right now," she chuckled. Understatement of the year. "But.. Regina i've never felt the way i did with you with anyone and hell, i tried but it never worked. At first i convinced myself that it had to do with the fact that i couldn't make you happy, but then you told me the truth and i got so mad and i realised… No matter how many feelings i still have about this, none of them matter because what matters most is i want you in my life."
Stunned, Regina looked at him with wide eyes. "So you're saying…" She didn't dare to keep going. She was just hoping he would get the hint and say it. And hell, he did.
"I'm saying i want to take things slow but i want to rediscover everything about you and i want… if you're willing, that is. There's work to do, but i want to let us figure things out. Together." He said, stepping slowly towards her until he was at less than an arm's reach.
But reality came rushing back. It wouldn't be that easy. "Robin i have to go back to New York, my whole life, my work, everything is there and i did plan on coming back already but if you and i really want a shot… Distance isn't going to work." She said sadly.
He nodded, then reached in his pocket. "Well then it's lucky i have a trip to New York planned, isn't it?" He said smiling, taking out a ticket to New York.
She gasped, her eyes going to his face, to the ticket, then his face again. "Wha- What about the coffee shop?" She asked, tears filling her eyes as she tried to hold them back.
"I had Mulan covering for me, i'm due to a week off either way and i thought maybe a few days away, in your world, would give us a chance to figure things out and to see if we can still make it work. Don't worry i'm not moving in and i can take a hotel if you want to."
She was lucky. So fucking lucky she could barely believe it.
She closed the distance and searched his eyes, when he nodded his permission, she pressed a soft kiss to his lips.
They didn't let the kiss heat, but both of them felt like a thousand of butterflies were flying in their stomachs and like a million little shining stars had just aligned.
When they pulled back, she chuckled, still feeling very emotional. When she saw his confused look, she explained. "It's always going to be you, isn't it?"
He joined her in her chuckle and they kissed again, still soft and tender.
After a few seconds they smiled and hand in hand went in the direction of their gates, ready to take a chance, to make this relationship work for the first time without the influence of an abusive mother and without the baggage this place gave them.
Once in the plane, Robin put a letter in her hand.
She waited until he fell asleep to read it, and when she did, she put her head on his shoulder, smiling as big as she hadn't done so in a long time.
« Dear Regina.
I just read your letter, and i have to say your words were nice and sweet and touched me.
You have no idea how grateful i am for our time together.
I really want to forgive you and just give us another chance. I think… I think i'm still in love with you and it's what i want but for now i guess i just need a bit of time to process anything
The day i'll be ready you'll be reading this, this is a promise i'm making to myself.
In the meantime… i have to go pick some flowers.
Robin. »
As it turns out, they did make it work.
For the rest of their lives.