Chapter 4: The Lambs Forgiveness
"O-okay but... Why this one? There w-were other humans that fell, why n-not them?"
"Because," Came a soft, timid voice. Sans' head snapped down to see the kid sitting up, looking at the lizard with a small, sorrowful smile. "I... I can't die..." they murmured, turning head down to stare at their upturned palms. He hadn't even felt them move to sit up, when had they done that? "Would you... Pass up... An opportunity like... that?" the child asked, clenching a small fist. "Nothing would... Be able to stop you... Ever again... And if something tried... You just go back... And learn from your mistake... There is no wrong, no mistakes... You are the strongest... The best... Always..." they seemed so sad. Sans could see them taking all the guilt upon themselves without question.
"I... I don't understand?" Alphys stuttered. Frisk smiled up at her, hands falling back to their lap. Fathomless patience could be seen in their eyes, so understanding for one so young.
"You are good... Good people... Do not think... Like that," despite struggling to speak, the child was not frustrated like he would have been. Their natural way of speaking was with their hands, not their voice. They greatly disliked being heard unless completely necessary. Sans supposed that this time, it was. "Think like this... If someone you loved... Were to... To die... You could go back... And stop them... From dying... You could help... Everyone... Never say the... Wrong thing... Always know what's right... To make someone... Someone happiest," they smiled at the understanding on the monsters face, looking a little relieved that their explanation was enough.
"O-Oh! I get it! If you hurt someones feelings and you liked them, then you could just LOAD and make it better next time! U-um... R-right?" Frisk nodded, and Alphys smiled brightly at having understood properly. Gradually, the smile faded to a frown. "But if someone wanted to be bad and kill a monster... They could learn every attack... Every timing... They... Oh my god..." the woman trailed off with a horrified expression.
"They would be unstoppable," Sans finished for her. The child nodded gravely. They would know best; after all, the demon had been controlling them. Silence fell around them. Alphys seemed to realize how close she'd gotten to the child but was too embarrassed to move away now that they were awake. Minutes ticked by at an agonizing rate, filled with a nervously twitching lizard woman, until Sans finally had enough. "How you feelin' pal?" he asked the child still sitting in his lap. They hadn't moved to get up, and the skeleton was content to have them so easily within his reach.
[Sore] they signed with their hands, rolling a shoulder for emphasis. He chuckled.
"Sorry bud, an old bag of bones like me probably isn't a very good pillow, I'm a little bony y'know," they giggled into their hand and he smiled. Not many people liked his terrible jokes, but Frisk did. He heard Alphys sigh and couldn't stop himself from grinning up at her. "What? My jokes are sans-sational and you know it," the human laughed into their arm, trying to be quiet. The lizard groaned, shaking her head. "Awe c'mon, Alphys. All Iguana do is make you laugh," with that, the monster threw up her hands and marched off towards her lab in frustration, picking her way around the rubble. Laughing out right, Sans and Frisk got to their feet and followed behind. The skeleton shouted puns to her retreating back, followed by Frisks uncontrolled giggles. He half expected the monster to slam the doors in their faces when they reached the lab in Hotland but instead she invited them in with an irritated wave of her clawed hand. He didn't miss the tiny smile on her face when she turned away though.
The lizard moved around her lab, cleaning up in the effort to keep busy. She called Asgore and told him all was well now, Sans had stopped the evil human, but they still had some things to go over later in private. At one point, Frisk started making puns to their skeleton friend with their Sign Language. His favourite so far was [do you like past-your-eyes milk?]. He'd laughed so hard he had started to tear up. When Alphys questioned his reaction, he calmed down long enough to explain only to fall back into rolls of rumbling laughter. The kid had made the sign for milk and moved it across their eyes, smile bright with anticipation. He told them that he'd steal that joke for himself one day and they just nodded happily, pleased to have contributed to his comedy act. When he fully recovered, he started helping Alphys clean up. He was surprised when the child didn't move to do so as well but they looked pretty tired so he just shrugged it off. That is, until Alphys yelped something about blood and rushed over to lift Frisk off the floor where they had presumably fallen back asleep. Sure enough, a thick coating of blood layered the humans right leg and had formed a small puddle under them. Panic gripped his soul and he immediately searched through all of Alphys' things to find what he needed. He mixed chemicals to create a disinfectant he hoped was strong enough, and handed it to Alphys to hold. He barked at her to not touch the human and to instead monitor their breathing. She shakily agreed and kneels next to the child to keep watch. The skeleton had never moved so fast in his life, running through the lab to collect a poor excuse for a med kit. He tore up a clean looking bed sheet for bandages, grabbed three bottles of water from the fridge, found some extremely thin wire and a tiny metal pick that he sharpened to a razor point before bending it slightly to be rounded. Supplies in his arms, he dropped to Frisks side and gently lifted the hem of their shorts so he could take in the full wound. It was awful. A large gash spread like a smile from the front of their thigh to the back, right down to the bone. Cursing colourfully, he waved Alphys back so he had full control over the area and began to work. Old memories kicked in from both his time in the labs and above ground. He cleaned the wound with a wet piece of cloth, wiping down their leg and then placing the soiled fabric under them so the wound wouldn't sit on the cold bloody tiles. He hesitated before pouring the home-made disinfectant over the wound. Frisk arched, hissing in pain and slamming their fist into the floor, shattering tile. Sans hurriedly grabbed their hands and told them to be still as gently as he could, apologizing for the pain. Face screwed up but still, he released the human and quickly disinfected the wire and needle with what was left of the liquid.
"Sorry about this kid, gonna hurt you some more," he said, flashing them an apologetic smile before sewing up the gash with practiced ease. The human immediately whimpered and hit the tiles again but they didn't move their leg so he kept going until the wound was fully stitched up. Disinfecting the wound one last time with the last few drops, Sans then wrapped the cloth around their leg tight enough to stem anymore blood loss without actually cutting off blood flow to their feet. Tying the fabric together so it wouldn't unravel, the skeleton leaned back on his heels and sighed. The child panted, no longer conscious. He wanted to scream. Something so dire had gone right over his fucking head. How? They had been asleep in his lap, how had he not been soaked with blood for fuck sake? Judging by the state of their shorts, they had probably been hold the fabric tight around the wound to slow down what they must have assumed would be their death.
"What... What happened?" Alphys whispered, too afraid of the skeleton to disturb him.
"I don't know yet. Do you mind if they borrow some of your clothes Al? I'll get them new ones, but these are ruined," he muttered, gesturing to the worn fabric. He heard the monster scuttle away and return moments later with a clean shirt. She apologized for not having trousers; she wore dresses all the time because of her tail. He waved it off and thanked her, preparing to take the child to his home in Snowdin to rest until Alphys stuttered out an invitation to stay at the lab for the night. "It would be s-safer for them, r-right? And we still need to t-talk to Asgore... You'll h-have to come back a-anyway," mulling it over, Sans couldn't really see a reason to not stay so he accepted and carried the kid where he was directed. The monster gave them her bed and left before he could object. With a shake of his head, Sans changed the kid and put them in the bed for some, hopefully, proper rest. The skeleton laid a gentle hand on the childs forehead and filled them with what meager healing magic he could muster. That sort of gentle, kind magic had never really been easy for him, it was more Papyrus' thing. Still, he could use a little and even if it didn't do much for Frisk, he at least wanted to try. A soft blue glow surrounded the human briefly, fading away as quickly as it came. He hoped that it would help at least a little and slid to the floor with his back against the bed. Staring up at the ceiling, the skeleton worked through his memories to see if he could find where the human may have sustained such a terrible blow. After a while of that, he let out a frustrated sigh and dropped his face into his hands. Perhaps it had happened in the middle of battle or before they even got to him. He couldn't recall a particularly bad hit from himself but there was no guarantee that a bone hadn't done more damage then he had thought it would. He was a lot stronger now then he once was after all; he didn't really know his full strength yet. Maybe he should think about training again. Maybe.
Sans leaned back to rest his head against the bed but stopped midway. Gazing down at his hands, the skeleton wiggled his phalanges cautiously. The usually white bone was stained a dark crimson, almost burgundy colour. A shudder ran up his spine, followed by the claws of his sins as they crawled up his back. His breathing constricted. Images flashed before his eyes, tainted red.
Frisk sat next to him at the bar, grinning brightly at his jokes and nodding along to his stories with an enthusiasm he wasn't used to, but found invigorating.
Frisks lifeless eyes gazed at the vaulted ceiling of the Hall, not able to notice the skeleton kneeling beside them.
Frisk joining in on his fun with teasing Papyrus and playing various fun pranks on their friends, like leaving little pink figures of bunnies all over Undynes house.
Frisks slack mouth hung slightly open in a frown, blood dripping from the corner, not able to respond to his plea.
Frisk stood in front of his hot dog stand in Hotland, thirty hot dogs balanced precariously on their head, a triumphant smile on their face.
Frisks pale cheeks showed tear tracks, a few droplets still lingering at the very edges of their eyes, bringing no comfort to his pained soul.
Frisk sat on the cliff beside him, eyes on the horizon to watch the colours dance into the blinking stars, their first sunset fading into a vast universe above.
Frisks blood-matted hair hid part of their face from his gaze.
Frisk struggled to carry a large log that would be used in the building of their new home. They smiled widely when he used his magic to lighten their load for them.
Frisks torn up sweater did nothing to hide the bruises and cuts he had inflicted.
Frisk hastily asking for permission to have sleepovers with him and Papyrus so they could all stay close.
Frisk had lost a boot at some point, their bare foot looking too small next to the one remaining yellow piece of footwear.
Frisks first duties as Ambassador, organizing the monsters so the flow would be more manageable while they casually made puns with him to Asgore's dismay.
Frisks pale skin was littered with bruises, blood and gashes, staring at him accusingly.
Frisk walking with him to New Grillbyz on their first date with him, pretending to ignore their loud stalkers, Papyrus and Undyne.
Frisks body losing all the colour of life, no longer leaving a chance at a smile or blush for one of his dumb jokes.
Frisk sitting with him on a clear hill, gazing up at the stars until dawn, pointing out different constellations to him.
Frisks cold, broken hand cradled in his, their killer.
Sans' eye ached from the magic that blazed there, the blue fire licking the side of his skull. Chara was unforgivable, but him? He'd done just as terrible. He sat by and watched, and when there was no one left, he murdered a child, his once best friend, for a revenge that he honestly didn't care about anymore. How horrible was he? To have more memories of Frisk being dead then of them being alive. To know the cold, soulless gaze better then their kind patient one, he must be truly awful. He deserved that hell. He deserved this one. Frisk would leave for the above ground as soon as possible, leaving them behind. Those that were left would feel the hollowness of the Underground and those few able to protect it would disappear, one by one, out of grief. Sans would be the first to go, and then Alphys. Maybe even Asgore. Hopelessness and despair would spread through the Underground. Pain swelled in his chest, threatening to spill over. He deserved every second of hellish fire that would burn him to ashes once Frisk left. He was a demon that deserved no heaven.
Cold water splashed over the skeletons hands, rinsing away some of the dried crimson. A familiar sweater scrubbed off the rest, leaving clean white bone. Gentle hands lifted his from his lap and his eyes followed them up to a flushed, round face framed by brown hair. Frisk pressed the palm of his hands against their cheeks and held them there, smiling at him encouragingly. A wave of calm spread through the skeleton as he gazed into the childs eyes, finding no hatred or malice. To this kid, Sans was a hero. He was brave and strong and kind, they found no reason to dislike or mistrust their friend. They felt completely safe with him, knowing he'd take care of everything should they be unable to. Frisk, he could see, held only love and patience for the old bag of bones. Tears slipped from his eyes, a luminescent blue that matched the fire in his left socket. Trembling, he pulled the human into a tight embrace, muttering apologies under his breath. They curled into him and patted his chest soothingly, silently encouraging him to feel better. He didn't care if Alphys saw, he hadn't cried in over sixty timelines and in that space he had witnessed so much shit that he had the right to cry just this once.