Saturday, March 24, 1984
Shermer High School
Shermer, Illinois, 60062
Dear Mr. Veron,
We Accept The Fact That We Had To Sacrifice A Whole Saturday In Detention. What We Did Was Wrong, But We Think You're Crazy To Make Us Write An Essay, Telling You Who We Think We Are. Why Do You Care? You See Us As You Want To See Us, In The Simplest Terms, With The Most Convenient Definitions. You See Us As A Brain, An Athlete, A Basket Case, A Princess, An Army Brat, And A Criminal. Correct? That's The Way We Saw Each Other At 7:00 This Morning.
Samantha's POV
I Clutched My Pink And White Bag To My Chest As Daddy Parked In Front Of Shermer High School. I Yawned, A Typical Action On School Day But Today Was Different. I Had To Be In School On A Fucking Saturday.
"Don't Yawn", Daddy Ordered, "Girls Like You Can't Yawn. You're Training To Be In The Army And We Don't Yawn. Also, Don't Catch Me With A Delinquent. Do I Make Myself Clear Samantha Reed?"
"Yes", I Said
"Yes What?", He Asked
"Yes Sir", I Said
"Good", Daddy Smiled
I Slung The Bag Over My Shoulder And Began To Walk Inside Of School. I'm Samantha, And Let's Just Say I'm More Of An Outcast. Everyone Is Always Jealous That I Get All The Straight A's, And I'm Always Called A Teacher's Pet.
The Only People Who Did Like Me Were My English Teacher And Allison Reynolds. Allison Is My Best Friend, Considering We Were Both Loners At Shermer.
I Walked Into The Library And I Saw The School's Prom Queen, Claire Standish And The School's Wrestling Star, Andrew Clarke Sitting At The Table On The Left Up Front, John Bender Sitting At The Table Behind Andy And Claire And The Smartest Guy In Our Grade, Brian Johnson Sitting At The Table Near John's.
I Wanted To Sit At The Table Next To Andrew And Claire. Allison Soon Had Walked In. We Shared Secret Smiles Before She Sat With Me At The Table Behind Brian. I Then Heard Andrew And Claire Snicker And I Glared At Them. I Always Hated Popular Kids.
"Why Are You Here, Sammy?", Allison Asked Smiling
"Why Are You Here?", I Asked
Before We Answered Our Questions, Vice Principal Vernon Came In With A Smug Smirk.
"Well, Well, Here We Are. I Wanna Congratulate You For Being On Time"
"Excuse Me, Sir?", Claire Said, "I Think There's Been A Mistake. I Know Its Detention, But I Don't Think I Belong In Here"
I Rolled My Eyes While Vernon Just Ignores Her As He Checks His Watch.
"It Is Now 7:06. You Have Exactly Eight Hours And 54 Minutes To Think About Why You're Here. Ponder The Error Of Your Ways.
Vernon Continued As From The Corner Of My Eye, I Saw John Bender Spit Up In The Air And Catch His Saliva In His Mouth.
"Jesus", I Whispered To Myself
"You May Not Talk", Vernon Said Pointing To Claire, "You Will Not Move From These Seats. And You Will Not Sleep. All Right, People, We're Going To Try Something A Little Different Today. We're Going To Write An Essay Of No Less Than 1000 Words Describing To Me Who You Think You Are"
"Is It A Test?", Bender Asked
"And When I Say Essay, I Mean Essay", Vernon Said, "I Do Not Mean A Single Word Repeated 1000 Times. Is That Clear, Mr. Bender?"
"Crystal", Bender Said
"Good, Maybe You'll Learn A Little Something About Yourself", Vernon Said, "Maybelline You'll Even Decide Whether Or Not You Cafe To Return"
"I Can Answer That Right Now, Sir", Brian Said, "That'd Be "No" For Me, Cause..."
"Sit Down, Johnson", Vernon Snapped
"Thank You, Sir", Brian Said
"My Office Is Right Across That Hall", Vernon Said, "Any Monkey Business Is Ill-advised. Any Questions?"
I Shook My Head With Everyone Else But When Vernon Went To Leave, John Spoke Up.
"Yeah, I Got A Question. Does Barry Manilow Know That You Raid His Wardrobe?"
I Bit My Lip To Keep In My Laughter.
"I'll Give You The Answer To That Question, Mr. Bender", Vernon Said, "Next Saturday. Don't Mess With The Bull, Young Man, You'll Get The Horns"
"That Man Is A Brownie Hound", John Said As Vernon Left The Library.
I Was Now Thinking About What To Write For My Essay And I Then Heard A Familiar Clicking Noise I Often Heard In Art Class. I Turned Around To See Allison Chewing On Her Nails. Everyone Else Noticed It And Allison Stopped And Gave Us All A Look Before She Went Back To Chewing Her Nails Again.
"You Keep Eating Your Hand, You Won't Be Hungry For Lunch", Bender Said
Allison Spat Her Nail At Him, But Missed.
"I've Seen You Before You Know", Bender Said But Then I Felt Eyes Burning Against My Skull
I Turned Around And Saw Bender Staring At Me.
"I've Never Seen You Though", Bender Said, "But Don't Worry, I Like A Pretty Face"
I Ignored Him And Turned Back Around.