Hi guys! Once again I am so overwhelmed by the lovely reviews I've gotten for this story. I never expected this to grow so big but your comments just make me want to write more and more! It's so nice having names to put to the guest reviews thank you so much for doing that it just makes it a bit more personal. I know it's been a couple of days since my last update and I wish I could update faster but unfortunately life gets in the way :( still, to say thanks for the lovely long reviews I've written a 4000 words chapter. I hope you enjoy it and please leave a review. Thanks for stI long with my story!

"Have we got an ID on this guy?" Cragen asked as he joined Fin and Nick in the bullpen.

"We got a pretty decent photo of him from Amanda's cell phone," Nick said, holding up a slightly grainy printout. He grimaced as he looked at it. Amanda was draped over the guy like she'd known him her whole life. Amanda looked happy and comfortable but Nick could see how his arm was possessively wrapped around her shoulder.

"TARU ran it through the drivers license database and came up with one match," Fin explained, pinning the printout of the license on the board, "Stephen Wentworth,"

"Why do I know that name?" Cragen asked, scrutinising the photo fin had pinned up.

"He just took over as the director of Wentworth and Sons brokerage. Married, two kids and absolutely nothing on his record. He's squeaky clean," Fin reeled off the information as he read from the file he'd put together.

"What's a guy like that doing in little backstreet haunts?" Nick mused. The guy was ridiculously wealthy, prestigious, someone that shouldn't normally be seen dead in the places he'd been in the previous night.

"The guy's just come into a lot of money, maybe he's blowing it somewhere he won't get noticed, look how he's dressed in that picture," Fin pointed to the photo, where there suspect was dressed in a scruffy leather jacket, his face unshaven, "no ones gonna think this guy is one of New Yorks richest men,"

"The fact remains is that he IS one of New York's richest men, if we go after him it's gonna have to be airtight, we can't afford mistakes here," Cragen said with a deep sigh, "I know Amanda was with this guy for a lot of the night, but is she absolutely sure that he was the one who attacked her?" Cragen asked with a raised eyebrow. He knew it would draw a reaction from Amanda's partner, but as he'd said right from the beginning, they had I play this one by the book.

"It's right there in her statement Cap," Fin snapped, immediately jumping to the defense of his partner. "He's the guy she described to Olivia and the forensic artist. She named him,"

Nick flipped through the file containing the results of Amanda's rape kit. Neither Fin or himself had brought themselves to go through it yet but they both knew the inevitable was coming. He passed as quickly as he could through the multiple pictures of her injuries until he got to the page he needed.

"Fin, her blood alcohol at the hospital was .29, the Cap's right, we need to cover all our bases before we go to the ADA for a warrant," Nick said, wincing. He knew it sounded like he didn't trust Amanda's statement.

"Oh so we're gonna call Olivia and get her to question Amanda again, tell her we don't believe her because she had a drink? No man I'm not doing that. She's my partner, I've got her back," Fin admonished, a mask of disbelief on his face. Deep down he knew that they should be covering all the bases, but his first instinct was to protect his partner.

"Fin I'm sorry but if you can't approach this objectively I'm going to have to take you off the case," Cragen said, and as Fin looked into the older man's eyes he knew he was being serious.

"No, look I'm sorry, I'm just frustrated," Fin admitted. Cragen have him a curt nod, agreeing for now but still letting Fin know that he would be watching closely.

"Right what we need is the security tapes from outside the bar, see if they have one in the alley, and witness statements from the bartender and anyone who may have talked to the pair," Cragen instructed, "we need to put together a timeline of events to make sure they match up with Amanda's,"

Fin bristled at Cragen's last comment but he kept his mouth shut and Nick shot him a sympathetic look, "we do have to go over Amanda's statement again, why don't you go talk to her and I'll head over to Callahan's and her started there?" Nick offered. He knew that a large part of Fin's frustration was coming from not having actually seen Amanda yet. He'd felt the same way during Olivia's abduction and he sympathised with the older detective.

"Liv said she wasn't ready," Fin replied, torn between wanting to go and see his partner and wanting to respect her need for space.

"She's had some time to rest, to calm down a little. Why not just go and see and if not come and join me at the bar?" Nick offered, as he handed Fin the file with Amanda's original statement in.

"That's not a bad idea Nick," Cragen added. Even though he'd told Olivia she would be the one who'd be dealing directly Amanda, the captain wondered if maybe Fin would be more focused when he'd seen and spoken to Amanda, "I'll give Olivia a heads up, they went back to Amanda's apartment," he informed, "I'll make sure anything else CSU finds is rushed here for when you get back," Cragen said before he turned to go back to his office.

"Thanks Cap," Fin called before he turned to leave himself.

"Hey Fin," Nick said, reaching to catch the other detective's arm, "just let her know..." Nick struggled to find the right words, "make sure she's okay,"

"I will man," Fin replied.

Amanda had stopped crying a while ago, exhausted from the effort of her tears but Olivia had kept holding her, not that she really had any choice because Amanda's arms were still wrapped over her own, keeping her in place. She didn't mind though, Olivia was grateful that Amanda was finding comfort in it, that she was reaching out and trusting her. Olivia sighed sadly at thought of what Amanda had had to go through. The recent events were bad enough but the things she had been carrying around with her were awful too. Olivia berated herself for not pursuing things when Amanda had first disclosed to her two years ago. Maybe then this wouldn't have happened. Olivia had suspected where was a reason to Amanda's gambling other than the rush of it. She knew now it was probably a way of forgetting, of coping, something Olivia herself knew about too well. One glass of wine wasn't enough for the brunette, it was three or four now. It was so easy to get caught up when you're desperately trying to forget something else.

"What're you thinking about?"

Olivia shook her head slightly as Amanda's words pulled her back from her thoughts. The blonde's voice was raspy from her sobbing, and she sniffled, her nose still a little congested.

"Nothing, just drifted off for a second," Olivia said quickly, hoping Amanda wouldn't see through the lie.

"Oh," Amanda whispered, and if she suspected that Olivia wasn't being truthful with her she didn't bring attention to it. They settled back into a comfortable silence for a few more minutes before Olivia felt Amanda tense up in her arms again.

"Olivia I'm sorry, about all of this," Amanda apologised, finally pulling away from Olivia's embrace.

"Don't," Olivia said softly, and Amanda turned to face her. The pain and guilt in the blonde's eyes was almost too much for Olivia to bear.

"Don't push me away. I meant what I said. I'm not gonna let you do this on your own, you don't have to," Olivia said sincerely as she looked at the doubtful woman in from of her, "I know you had an awful time in Atlanta, but it's different here, we're like a family Amanda," Olivia said.

Amanda chewed on her lip and offered the brunette a sad smile, "I was so awful to you, and to Nick, and I've been lyin' to Fin and you guys and I just..."

"I was pretty awful to you when you first transferred," Olivia cut in. "And to Nick. But that didn't stop you all from trying your hardest to find me when I was abducted," Olivia reasoned. She swallowed the small lump that formed in her throat as she thought about her recent ordeal and shook her head to rid herself of the images before she continued, "we all do crappy things sometimes, and we piss each other off but when it comes to the important stuff, we fight hard for our own. That's what a family is and I know it's hard but you have to trust me honey. The guys are out there looking for the bastard that attacked you and I'm here, for whatever you need,"

"Olivia," Amanda whispered, closing her eyes against tears that were threatening to fall. She wanted so badly to trust Olivia, god knows she'd already told the brunette more about herself than anyone else knew.

"If you need to talk, to vent, if you need someone to get angry at or someone just to hold you when nothing else will help I'm here. I know how hard it is to try and do it on your own, I don't want you to have to do that again," Olivia said, her words sure and sincere. The brunette paused for a moment, giving her words a chance to sink in.

Amanda let Olivia's words wash over her. Never in her life had she been more compelled to place her trust in someone, and with a small smile she realised that she had been reaching out to the brunette detective from the start of this whole ordeal. And Olivia had trusted Amanda with her biggest secret.

"I've never done well with leaning on anybody," Amanda admitted, her fingers nervously picking at a loose thread on the hem of her shirt, "I'm probably gonna push you away even if I don't want to."

Amanda hadn't had a proper friend since grade school. She knew what she was like whenever she got too close to someone. She ran away, protecting herself before that person had a chance to hurt her. It was a lesson she'd learnt growing up.

"Then I'll just pull you back harder," Olivia grinned, earning a small smile from the blonde.

"Thank you Olivia," Amanda whispered. She tore her gaze away from Olivia's and glanced around the apartment. Where exactly they went from here she wasn't sure.

"You're welcome Amanda," Olivia smiled warmly, "now I don't know about you but I'm so hungry my stomach is about to eat itself," the brunette exclaimed, her admission cutting through the emotional tension that was thick in the air. It even pulled a tiny laugh from Amanda.

Relieved at Olivia's ability to change the tone of the conversation so seamlessly Amanda realised that she was indeed quite hungry.

"Didn't you order over an hour ago?" Amanda questioned, "they're usually pretty good," she frowned.

"Just a second," Olivia said, walking over to the door. She opened it, bent down then stood back up with a bag of food in her hand.

"What?" Amanda asked, puzzled.

"I stuck the money to the door with a note saying to just leave the food and keep the change," Olivia replied. She reached into the bag and pulled out one of the containers, "it's still hot,"

"In this building you're lucky neither the money or the food went missing," Amanda said, shaking her head at the fact Olivia's plan had worked.

Following Olivia in to the kitchen Amanda was grateful that the brunette took it upon herself to her out the plates and cutlery. She wasn't sure that bending down or stretching up to reach were things she could attempt yet. Amanda spies the bottle of painkillers on the side and fought an urge to take another one. She not long had some but the pain was nagging at her a lot. The sharp intense pain in her ribs wasn't too bad because as long as she didn't move too quickly or breathe too deeply it was bearable. It was the constant dull ache deep in her belly that was causing her the most distress.

"There's soda in the fridge if you want some?" Amanda offered as she took a small helping of sweet and sour chicken and noodles. She was hungry but having not really eaten in a while she didn't want to overestimate how much she could eat. Olivia flashed a brief look of concern at the minuscule portion and Amanda piled on a few more noodles.

Olivia opened the fridge and pulled out two cans of diet coke and walked back into the lounge, balancing the cans in one hand and her plate in the other. Amanda followed, relieved that Olivia hadn't wanted to sit at the hard chairs in the kitchen.

Amanda eased herself into the soft cushions next to Olivia who had already made herself comfortable. Automatically Amanda reached for the remote control, and the TV came to life as she pressed the buttons on it. She flicked through the channels for a bit before settling on another quiz show that Olivia knew she wasn't going to be really watching.

They sat in silence as the ate, the only sounds being the gentle hum of the TV and the occasional scraping of metal on porcelain. Olivia had finished her considerably larger portion when she noticed that Amanda had not even eaten half of hers. She was pushing the food around the plate, sneaking nervous glances at Olivia when she thought the brunette wasn't looking.

"If you're not hungry don't force it," Olivia said softly, hoping to alleviate some of Amanda's tension. The blonde let out a breath and put the plate on to the coffee table but Olivia realised that Amanda hadn't relaxed, not really.

"Look I know we've talked about some pretty big things today," Olivia started, she has begun to guess what was bothering Amanda. The blonde nodded.

"But I don't want you to think it's the only thing you can talk to me about. Unless it's directly pertinent to the current case I'm not going to bring it up at all. Not unless you want to talk about it," Olivia reassured her, "don't be afraid that I'm going to force you to talk about it because I'm not, if you never talk about Atlanta to me again that's okay, if you ring me at 3 in the morning to talk about it that's okay too. You're in control, alright," Olivia flashed Amanda a soothing smile and she saw the blonde visibly relax at her last four words. Olivia knew herself how frightening it was to feel so out of control, she knew she needed to let Amanda know that she was in charge.

"I... thank you Olivia," Amanda said, a slight blush colouring her cheeks.

"It's okay," Olivia smiled, "hey what's your favourite colour?" the brunette asked, once again expertly changing the focus of the conversation.

"Why?" Amanda asked, a vaguely amused look crossing her face.

"Because I want to get to know you detective Rollins is that a crime?" Olivia joked tentatively, hoping Amanda would play along.

"I suppose not," Amanda quipped back, though Olivia noticed how her smile didn't quite reach her eyes, "my favourite colour is green. Like the grass in the spring before the sun scorches it yellow," the blonde revealed, the wistful look on her fave telling Olivia that it was Georgia grass not New York grass she was referring too, "yours?"

"Blue," Olivia replied, "like the ocean. I've always found water calming," she explained.

The pair continued this game for about an hour and in that time Olivia had told Amanda about her high school boyfriends, her favourite vacation destinations, her most embarrassing moment and the musical she had listened to growing up, amongst other things. Olivia had managed to coax smaller tidbits of information from Amanda, steering well clear of asking her about her childhood when she saw how Amanda reaction to an innocent question about what her house looked like as a kid.

Olivia didn't push, instead kept the questions superficial and fun, she knew and a had already shared a lot with her today and the whole point of the exercise was to relax the blonde, not panic her. The brunette detective had learned that Amanda was a terrible cook and that's why she hadn't bothered to replace her oven. Olivia had watched with a happy heart as Amanda had talked about Frannie, had told Olivia how she had visited a shelter one day not long after she'd moved to New York and knew she wasn't leaving without the dog. Olivia had noticed signs of Amanda's tiredness a while before her eyes began to flutter closed. The brunette instinctively knew Amanda was afraid of having another nightmare, so she had promised the younger woman that she would be there when she woke up.

With Amanda sleeping soundly, Olivia tucked the couch throw around her and tenderly ran her hand through soft blonde hair. She noticed how even in her sleep Amanda's features were not relaxed, and Olivia wished she could take her pain away, whether it was mental or physical pain the blonde was in.

Olivia quietly cleared the plates away before she dug in her purse to find her phone. She cursed silently as she realised it had run out of battery. She knew she should really phone Brian and give him a better explanation that she had done when she'd kicked him out of bed at 3:30 the previous morning. She glanced at her watch. It was only 6:30pm. She could put off calling Brian for another hour or so, she was thinking of taking another nap, and the sofa was so comfortable.

As Olivia curled up on the opposite side of the couch to Amanda a soft knock on the door caught her attention. She jumped up automatically and grabbed her gun. Glancing back over to Amanda she saw that she was still sleeping. It probably wasn't anything to worry about but Amanda hadn't mentioned expecting any visitors and it was better to be safe than sorry.

Olivia lowered her gun as soon as she looked through the peephole. She placed the weapon down on a cabinet and opened the door as quietly as she could. Leaving the latch on, Olivia walked out into the hall, forcing Fin to go with her.

"What are doing here?" Olivia asked, her annoyance evident even in her hushed tone.

"Cap didn't ring you?" Fin asked, a puzzled look on his face.

Olivia shook her head, "my phone died," she explained, her voice softer, "is there a break in the case?"

"Sort of, we ID'd the guy," Fin started, before she was but off by an excited Olivia.

"Have you made an arrest?"

Fin blew out a frustrated breath, "Liv this guy is one of New Yorks richest. DA's office isn't gonna touch it until we're sure Amanda's story is airtight," he explained, and Olivia could see the distress it cause the man to show any kind of doubt in his partner.

"Well that's..." Olivia sighed. It wouldn't do any good to her angry. They had to do this the right way, "let me talk to her Fin it's going to be better coming from me," Olivia reasoned.

Conflict played across Fin's face. He knew rationally that it was probably a better idea for Olivia to talk work Amanda, as she'd taken the original statement but his heart was telling him that he needed to go and check on his partner, even for 5 minutes.

"Okay you're right," he relented, "Liv can I see her, just for a few minutes?" he asked.

"She's asleep Fin I don't know if it's a good idea," Olivia said. Her heart went out to him, she could see how much it was affecting him, but at the same time she had made Amanda a promise.

"Please Liv," Fin said desperately.

Olivia sighed, "let me go and ask her. Wait here for a minute," she told him, turning once to make sure he stayed in the hall, "if she says no then you can't I'm sorry," Olivia explained, closing the door softly, leaving Fin momentarily stranded in the hallway.

"Amanda," Olivia said as she knelt by the couch, "Amanda can you wake up for me?" she said a little louder.

Amanda whimpered at the noise and Olivia resigned herself to the fact that the blonde was going to wake in a panic whatever she did. "You've got a visitor," Olivia kept speaking, hoping it would rouse Amanda from her slumber. She gently shook the blonde's shoulder and this was the action that causes Amanda's eyes to fly open and violent shivers to take over her body.

"It's okay Amanda, it's just me, it's Olivia. I had to wake you sweetheart I'm sorry," Olivia apologised as Amanda looked around the room in a panic.

"You want a glass of water?" Olivia asked as Amanda got her shivering under control.

"No I'm okay," Amanda replied in a shaky voice.

Olivia paused, wondering how best to pose the question to the shaken woman, ultimately deciding it would be better to just say it how it was.

"Fin's outside, he wants to see you," Olivia informed her in a soft voice, "but if you don't want to I'll send him home. It's your choice alright," Olivia said, making sure Amanda knew she had options.

Amanda's heart dropped a she listened to Olivia. She couldn't believe Fin was here. How could she face him after she flat out lied to him? Would he even still want her as a partner? He was the best partner Amanda had ever had. No, he couldn't see her like this.

"He's really worried about you," Olivia told her honestly.

"I..." Amanda sighed and shook her head, she was about to refuse when she realised she was going to have to face the guys sooner or later. Maybe it would be easier to do it one at a time. All she had to do was put on a brave face and tell Fin she was doing okay, really and then he'd leave her alone and go back to the case.

"Okay but can you stay?"she asked in a tiny voice.

"Are you sure?" Olivia asked gently, she could see that Amanda was conflicted.

"No... yeah. It's o-okay," Amanda stammered.

"Alright," Olivia said, and she gave Amanda's shoulder a reassuring squeeze before she went to open the door.

Amanda kept her eyes on the floor and she could vaguely hear some hushed whispers before the door closed again. She didn't look up but Amanda knew when Fin had sat down in the armchair.

"Hey blondie," he said, and Amanda was almost brought to tears at his use of a nickname he reserved only to use to bring a smile to her face after a particularly rough day. His voice was the softest Amanda had ever heard it be but still still couldn't bring herself to look at her partner.

"How you doing baby girl?" he asked softly.

thanks for reading :)