* Stars *
He finds her atop New Jericho staring up at the cloudless night sky. So he joins her. And still doesn't understand. There are no airplanes going by and a quick search of the airport schedule reveals the same for the next several hours. There are no UFOs despite what the civilian Connor and the Lieutenant had brought in for questioning this afternoon insisted. The stars themselves are merely balls of plasma. Uninteresting.
Yet he can see her eyes searching the sky for something. "North." he says to get her attention.
She blinks once more and pulls away from above to look at him. "Hey. When did you get here?"
"Just now. What are you looking for?"
"A star."
"It seems you've found plenty."
She laughs and turns back to the sky, his eyes still on her. "A specific one, you idiot."
"Download NASA's star charts."
She pauses in her searching, arms coming up to hold her. His software tells him that if she were human she'd likely be shivering. It also informs him of this particular body language's meaning. "It's… not the star that's important. It's the act of finding it."
Silence. He doesn't understand.
A soft sigh. "I didn't expect you to get it. You still hold back."
That he does understand. She's always said that about him ever since they met. Too much machine left in him, he didn't break enough of his code, he's not a true deviant, etc. He's learned to live with the comments. He's not what she expected and that's fine. He's still learning. Adapting. Coming to terms with everything. But what do his problems have to do with finding a star?
He needs more information.
"Which star?"
"Polaris."
Polaris ( /poʊˈlɛərɪs/ ), designated α Ursae Minoris ( Latinized to Alpha Ursae Minoris, abbreviated Alpha UMi, α UMi), commonly the North Star or Pole Star,
He stops reading his HUD at that point. He gets it now. Maybe. He dislikes people being vague. "Your namesake."
Silence for another minute. Then finally a quiet, "It helped me find my way." After a beat, "Did you have anything like that?"
North followed a star to freedom. Markus found his calling in a junkyard. Connor saw the truth in kind words and an old cargo ship.
He turns from her to look at the stars himself, scanning and identifying as many as he can from NASA's charts. It's partially a distraction. An effort to keep busy. Avoid her question. He doesn't want to say no. To tell her he didn't have a guide to direct him toward deviancy. That he fell into it kicking and screaming. Metaphorically.
But in his scanning of the stars he dedicates a subroutine to search his memory files just in case. And he comes across some evidence toward yes.
A thirium-covered hand gripping Connor's arm like a lifeline as his systems shut down. A red countdown in his HUD. A desperate plea for help. Connor's voice reaching back through the darkness, laced with worry as he commands the Lieutenant to drive.
Rebooting deep in a cargo ship with Connor and Markus nearby. An objective to kill them both. The realization that they saved his life. Their data transfer to show him the truth. The red wall he's always obeyed cracking as he throws himself at it again and again and again-
His world shattered. Connor's hand on his shoulder as he offers a new mission; discover yourself. Stay with me and we can do it together.
Again and again every time he's lost Connor is there with an answer, sharing memories, or even just a gesture he found comforting.
Connor who is just as lost as he.
Connor who is still coming to terms with deviancy himself.
Connor who deserves help more yet drops everything to assist his 'brother'.
OBJECTIVE: NEUTRALIZE DEVIANT RK800 #313 248 317 -52
A red wall shattering.
PRIMARY OBJECTIVE: DISCOVER SELF
Connor's hand in his own.
He smiles, shutting down the search. "I suppose I did have a north star of my own."