Mindlessly scrolling through his phone the sound of footsteps caught Eren's attention. He saw a nice pair of long legs, a slim elongated face and an ash brown undercut...It was horse face! He could feel a smile start to tug at the corners of his lips. He raised a hand to get his attention and called out to him using his 'nickname' for the blonde.
(Jean insists it was an insult and not a cute nickname)
Jean's usually soft horse eyes seemed to harden over when he spotted him ...He went from walking briskly to a full-on sprint. Running like a majestic horse.
"Eren you jackass!" Jean screamed before swinging his fist.
"What the fuck, Jean?!" Eren howled.
His hand reaching to tentatively touch the side of his head where Jean had socked him. Duly noted that Jean was strong.
"Just when I was starting to trust you! You betray me!"
Eren's eyebrows furrowed in confusion as he looked around for someone, anyone to explain what the fuck was going on.
"What are you talking about, horse face?!"
Eren could feel his blood start to boil. Why did he hit him? It was probably for some stupid reason! Doesn't he know that it hurts like a motherfucker?! Unsympathetic bastard.
"Mikasa!"
Now he was just shouting his girlfriend's name apropos of nothing!
"What about Mikasa?" He was seething now.
Someone tell him what's going on. He was feeling like an idiot. Was that his plan? To make him feel like an idiot? He always felt like a fool when he hung around Jean for too long.
"You're dating her!" He shouted.
"Uhh...Yeah so..?"
"What do you mean so? You knew I liked her!"
Eren blinked...Jean...liked Mikasa…? Since when…?
"Hey, hey! Don't give me that oblivious look! It was obvious! I mean the only reason I hang out with you is because of Mikasa!"
….oh….
That hurt...That really, really , hurt to hear. It hurt more than when he clobbered him...It felt like something was tearing him apart from the inside out…It hurt...Why would…? He was using him..? His blood ran hot and his skin flushed red...Everything was blurring...Why was it blurring..? A teardrop fell...ah...that's why...
"...E-Eren…? Are you…?"
"Y-You..dick!"
Eren charged forward and made sure to hit Jean across that pretty boy face of his, before booking it...How dare that horseface make him cry! Why was he still crying!?
Furiously rubbing tears out of his face he tried to hold back any more incoming tears. He hated the waterworks.
"The only reason I hang out with you is because of Mikasa!"
Fuck!
Just when he thought that maybe they were starting to get along...he thought that maybe Jean didn't hate him, that maybe he might actually...URG!He didn't want to think anymore. He didn't want to think about Jean, or Mikasa or why he felt so sad when Jean admitted he only hung around him because of Mikasa...What was so great about her anyway?! She wasn't so great! If Jean knew her like he did...then…
If Jean knew him better then he would know that…
..that...
That Mikasa wasn't better than him!
He didn't bring this up to Mikasa. A part of him knew that if he did then whatever relationship the two may have had with Jean would be served without question. It was scary now that he thought about it. How quickly Mikasa was able to cut ties with people simply because of what Eren may have done or said...and as his seemingly final act of friendship towards Jean he chose to remain quiet on the matter.
He still wasn't so sure why he overreacted that way...It felt normal to feel a bit angry towards the blonde as not only did he hit him but he admitted that he had the hots for his girlfriend...but this feeling of disappointment was something new...and unusual...He needed to get his mind off of this.
"Mikasa let's go to the fair!"
"Okay…"
10 minutes into their fair date and already Mikasa was carrying a handful of won prizes. She was so good at everything she did. Always was even as a kid. She was what people called a natural-born prodigy. Quick to learn and quick to perfect. He himself always struggled. It wasn't that he wasn't smart it just took a little longer for things to sink in. His mother always did say he had a thick head and an even thicker skull...it seemed for each labored step forward he took Mikasa took two flawless bounds...It must be nice to be a natural-born prodigy never having to work hard or struggle…His grip on her hand tightened slightly…
She looked over fleet concern crossing her face.
"Are you feeling alright?" She asked with gentle eyes.
"Hmm...oh yeah!" He replied his train of thought abruptly cut off.
"If there's anything wrong don't hesitate to say." She spoke softly with worried eyes as she interlaced their fingers together.
"Geez, Mikasa quit being such a worrywart I told you I'm fine!" He growled.
"...ok…"
She's upset...shit...A half-assed apology was already on his lips when…
"The only reason I hang out with you is because of Mikasa!"
The apology died in the back of his throat...
He was always compared to Mikasa by friends, family, and teachers…
They always said Mikasa was better. That she was perfect, well behaved, smart and more mature...He should consider himself very lucky to have her as a friend and as a girlfriend...She was strong and attractive and it made sense that Jean would fall for her...But...he was strong to! Just as that thought crossed his mind he spotted a high striker strongman game. He made his way over and Mikasa happily followed him their hands still interlocked together.
He was going to win. He was going to win something for Mikasa! He was going to prove he was just as strong as she was...that they were equal…! Taking the hammer in his hands he felt strength course through him.
"Which one do you want?" He asked with a confident smile.
"Hmm...I'm fine with whatever you get me…" She responded after lazily surveying the prizes available.
She truly didn't care, just the fact that Eren got it for her was enough.
Eren pursed his lips in thought with a slight frown…Was she always like that? Always so...unconcerned and dispassionate? Was that the word he was looking for…? Shaking his head he didn't care to dwell too much on that thought. He had more pressing manners to deal with like winning this carnival fair game. He glanced at the prizes that were at the very top and ignored all the 'loser' prizes…
There were a lot of large cute plushies, most being from well-known franchises like Pocket Monster...Mikasa loved cute things, had a certain weakness towards them, but she didn't like video games… Knowing all this he, for whatever reason, decided he wanted to get the chibi plushie of the Rogue Titan from the 'Attack On Titans' game he and Jean always played together.
"Alright..!"
Pumping himself up he lifted the hammer high in the air ready to strike the dumb carnival game with everything he had. There was no way he was holding back! Bringing the hammer down with all the force he could muster his green eyes eagerly watched the red indicator fly up and just reach the half-way mark before it started to come back down...along with his heart. A knot started to form at the back of his throat as something akin to disgust and rage started to fill his belly.
"Congratulations Sir you may choose one of the lower to mid-tier end prizes!"
He barely registered that sentence...congratulations..? Was he fucking joking? Congratulations for what!? Sucking at life?! Congratulations on being second best! Congratulations on being a weak little shit who couldn't win a dumb carnival prize for his stupid perfect girlfriend! Congratulations his ass!
"I want to try again." He said gritting his teeth...He was surprised he hadn't shouted it out as every fiber of his being began to vibrate with hot ire.
"Eren if you want a certain prize I can get it for you." Mikasa suggested gently pulling the hammer out of his hands…
She walked up toward the front of the game...
Stop…
Blankley looked at the prizes and pointed at the rogue titan.
"That one right..?"
Why are you doing this…?
Despite not getting an answer it seemed like Mikasa was going to go through with it. She grabbed the hammer with both hands…
Don't...you dare...
Lifting it easily over her head…
I was supposed to do it...I'm strong!
She brought it down with a force no mortal should have.
I...I...I'm just as s-strong as-
The bell not only rung it was almost torn clean off the wooden board, screws and all...It hung desperately off its last remaining screw still moving back and forth from the momentum.
...Something cracked deep inside him...splintering and shattering as if Mikasa herself had taken a hammer and rammed it through…
"OH MY GOD! That was amazing! Little lady remind me not to get on your bad side. Haha."
"The prize please."
"Oh of course! You can either pick one from the top tier, two from the middle tier or three from the lower tier."
As the exchange went on Eren could only watch as something started to bubble in the pit of his stomach. It was vile and hot seeming to course through his veins and up to the flush of his cheeks...He bawled his fist…
"This was the one you had your eye on right..?" She asked shyly holding up the prize he wanted to win…
He bit the inside of his cheek and simply nodded before taking the plush from her hands holding it in a vice grip...as if strangling the poor thing….Oh, he wanted to do more than just strangling; he wanted to rip it's stupid head off! Quietly with head bowed down in embarrassment and fingers digging into the soft fabric of the doll he muttered a quiet thanks…
"Anything for you." She said before placing a soft kiss on his red cheeks.
He felt bile rise up from the back of his throat