"Aw, thank you so much guys, but you didn't have to bring me anything, really!" Kate exclaimed with a wide smile stretching across her lips as she accepted the shopping bag from Lanie, which was containing fruits and vegetables, all kind of healthy foods.
On the next day, they all visited her at the hospital. Ryan, Espo, Lanie, and of course Castle was there too. It was an early afternoon, the only time when she was allowed to have visitors.
The sun was shining bright, its golden rays were streaming in through the half-shut blinds, illumintating the entire room. It was dark and gloomy the whole week so it was really nice to finally see the sun peeking out from the thin layers of clouds, but the weather was still cold and frigid anyway.
It was snowing hard all night and even now, despite the bright glare of the winter sun the entire city was still coated in white, patches of cottony snowflurries were adorning even the smallest window panes.
It was just mid-November, having that much snow was a bit unusual around this time of a year, but Kate didn't mind at all, she had always liked winter, so she was more than happy to finally see the whole landscape turning into a white wonderland.
Kate wanted to go outside so badly, strolling on the snow covered streets of New York, inhaling the refreshing, ice-cold winter air, but oh well, she was still weak and fragile, trapped in this damned hospital room.
"I'm so glad to finally see you honey!" Lanie pulled her in for a tight hug, drawing her away from her thoughts.
"Same, Lanie! I'm so glad to see you too!" She agreed with a wide smile tugging at her lips, returning her emrace without hesitation.
"And you too, guys. Thanks for coming!" Kate adressed toward the guys, Ryan and Esposito. "And thanks for doing everything to save me." She added in a lower voice, flashing them a smile of gratitude.
"No need to thank us, Beckett." Ryan said as he gave her a small hug as well, careful not to jostle the bunch of IV lines still attached to her left arm.
"Yeah, we are just glad you are okay." Espo chimed in with a bright smile. "At least we don't have to work after hours anymore." The Hispanic detective added with a smirk after hugging her too.
Kate only rolled her eyes at that, unable to hold back a smile.
"So how are you?" Lanie then asked cheerfully, after settling herself comfortable at the edge of her hospital bed.
Ryan and Espo, along with Castle were sitting on plastic chairs, but there weren't enough chairs for all of them, so Lanie choosed to sit on her bed, which Kate didn't mind at all. She was happy to be surrounded by her friends again.
"Well, I'm fine I guess." Kate answered with a nonchalant shrug, already tired of this particular question. "I just want to go home already." She sighed out in frustration, trying to arrange herself more comfortable in that damned hospital bed.
"Why Beckett, I thought you like being stucked with me." Castle chirped in to lighten up the mood.
"Shut up Castle." She instructed teasingly, rolling her eyes at him.
"I heard you can go home in a few days, so don't worry it will fly by." Lanie assured her cheerfully, patting her knees.
"Look at the bright side, Beckett. At least now you have enough time to finally read my new book." Castle quipped teasingly with a playful glint in his eyes, leaning an inch closer to her, his nose almost brushing the shell of her ear. "I promise it won't disappoint you." He then added on a low whisper, the heat of his breath caressing her skin.
Kate only rolled her eyes at that, her lips curling up in a shy smile.
"Seriously Castle? Are you promoting yourself to me now?" She tossed back, gently pushing him away. "Why I'm not surprised." She grumbled under her breath with another eye roll.
"Ew, you shouldn't put such a big pressure on her, Castle!" Ryan chimed in, clearly enjoying himself. "She needs to heal yet, remember?" At that, Kate bursted out in laugh, unable to hold herself back.
"Yeah, Ryan is right!" She chuckled.
"You should use your charm and fame to convince the doctors instead, and finally get me out of here Castle!" She said in a sing-song voice and oh God, those shining, hazel green eyes! He would gladly drown into them anytime!
"And besides, what if I say I would want to read something else instead, huh?" She retorted with a teasing grin tugging at her lips.
"You wound me Beckett. You really do." Castle pouted dramatically. "That's what I deserve after taking care of you for days, huh?!" He remarked teasingly.
Kate knew he was just kidding, she really did, but a sudden feel of guilt washed over her entire being anyway, ruining her mood, making her uncomfortable.
"I'm sorry I put you all through this guys, I didn't want to." She let out in a low voice, scraping her hand through her messy hair.
"It's okay Beckett, no need to apologize." Ryan assured her gently, patting her knees, which made her smile under her breath.
"You know I was just kidding, right?" Castle chirped in his usual, goofy voice, and Kate couldn't help but flash him brief smile.
"Yeah, I know." She relented with a sigh, trying to let it go.
Silence fell over them for a moment too long then, it was eventually Kate who decided it was time for a subject change.
"Any developments on the case?" She asked quietly, timidly, hoping that the guys could find a new lead in the last 24 hours.
"No, nothing. It's like chasing a ghost." Espo said with a heavy sigh, disappointed.
She only nodded in response, unable to add anything more. It's been almost a week since she got into the hospital, since she got poisioned, and still nothing. The case will most likely remain unsolved, she could already see that.
"I'm sorry Kate. We did everything we could." Ryan said in a serious tone, trying to reassure her.
"Yeah, I know," she sucked in a shallow breath, trying to get herself together, "but I wish... I just wish I could look into the case, I wish I could go back to work already." She sighed out, seemingly frustrated, fidgeting with the hem of her bedsheet.
"You will get back to it, don't worry." Lanie assured her softly, squeezing her hand.
"But I feel useless here!" She snapped back.
"Just a few more days, remember? It will pass by quickly!" Castle cut in, trying to calm her down.
"Yeah, says the one who could barely survive two days without my presence!" Kate tossed back with a grin, giving him a pointing glare, pushing his buttons like always.
"Yeah, that's right Beckett! He was like a baby, crying for you the whole time!" Espo joined, enjoying the banter.
"No, I wasn't!" Castle pouted like a child, making them all laugh.
"Well, now I feel like I missed out a lot!" Kate chuckled, her hazel green eyes sparkling with pure delight and happiness.
Yes, she was happy, Kate had admitted to herself. She was finally able to enjoy this moment, to enjoy the whole day without a constant fear or worry consuming her insides. She was freed from all the tension, from all the danger, from all the pain. The fight with Jerry Tyson was yet to come, yes, but for now,at least for now, she felt like herself again.
They kept talking about lighter topics then, teasing each other like always, until the visiting hours had slowly come to a close.
Kate didn't want to let them go yet, to say goodbye to her friends. She didn't want to stay in this damned hospital room for any longer, she didn't want to sit here and do nothing just think about her current condition. She wanted to go home already, to cuddle in the warmth of her own bed. But oh well, she couldn't, so after nodding them farewell her eyes suddenly started to fill with tears. She quickly reached up to wipe them away, letting out a low, silent whimper under her breath. Kate was already done with being here. She just wanted to go home.
Dusk had settled by the time the visitors had left, only the glow of the moon and the pale city lights were streaming in through the half-drawn curtains.
Her eyes were getting tired of the strong fluorescent lights overhead, so they switched to night lamp already, illuminating the hospital room with only a soft and dim, golden light.
It wasn't that late yet, but Kate was slowly getting tired, this noisy afternoon sucked all the energy out of her weak body.
She wasn't complaining at all, she was glad she could finally spend some time with Lanie and the boys, but she was still weak and fragile, and she could already feel the exhaustion slowly dragging her down.
"It was quiet a day, huh?" Castle said tiredly after slumping down at the edge of her hospital bed.
"Yeah, don't even tell." She sighed out heavily, covering her mouth with her hand to supress a yawn.
"Look Castle, you don't have to be here." She then said after a brief pause, nibbling on a slice of apple which Lanie and the boys had brought her. She was glad she was finally allowed to eat other than just hospital food, and she was glad she could finally stomach more than just a few bites.
"I'm already feeling better," Kate went on after downing the last bite of the fruit with a gulp of water, "and I can be here on my own, and I was thinking that you should-"
"Kate," He whispered, interrupting her babbling. "We talked about this, I'm staying." He insisted, his voice low and deep, leaving no room for any further argument.
"But..." She went on anyway, stammering, nervously fidgeting with the hem of her night gown. "When you said that you had to care about me for days, I thought-" She trailed herself off, not sure what to even say.
"I was just kidding Kate, you know that." He chuckled, reaching out to clutch his hands with hers. "I would never complain about being with you." He stated in a low voice filled with emotions, and their eyes met for a moment too long then, hazel greens lost in sky blues, then it was her who broke this precious moment by lowering her gaze in shame.
Of course she knew he was just kidding, but she couldn't get it off of her head.
"And what about Martha and Alexis?" Kate went on quietly, staring at her white bedsheet. "I'm sure they already miss you." She let out on a soft exhale, fidgeting with their joined hands.
"Don't worry about them Kate, they understand." Castle assured her softly. "Alexis is all grown up, she can be on her own for a week and my mother, well... you know she doesn't mind being on her own either." He chuckled under his breath, making her smile as well.
"They all miss you too, Kate." Hearing his words she brought her eyes up, staring into his deep blues once again. She was a part of their family for more than three years by now, she knew they all cared about her, she knew they all missed her, as in fact she had grown closer even to her daughter, their friendship made a lot of progress over the years, but still... somehow it felt awkward, being here like this, broken and fragile, stucked in a hospital bed. She never wanted to put his family through any of this.
"Speaking of my mother and Alexis," Castle began, interrupting the wirl of her thoughts, "they both want to visit you too as soon as possible, along with your dad of course, if that's okay with you."
Kate didn't reply anything, just flashed him a bright smile. Of course it was okay, she couldn't wait to meet them! Especially her dad, she haven't seen him since she had woken up, but Castle told her everything, how worried he was about her only daughter. Kate could only imagine, and she couldn't wait to finally meet her dad and tell him that she is okay, that everything is fine. Well, of course they had spoken through the phone multiple times since she had woken up, but still, it wasn't the same.
"Thank you Castle." She then said with a heavy sigh, after a moment of silence, after a long inner debate.
"For what?" He asked curiously, but she could see the knowing glint sparkling in the dept of his sky blue eyes.
"For being here for me, for not giving up on me, for talking to me when I was dying." She listed, suddenly needing him to know. Kate held his gaze steadily the whole time, observing the pale lamp light and the glow of street lights dancing in his features.
"You heard?" Was all he managed to get out around a think swallow, his eyes litting up with... hope maybe?
"Yeah," She smiled, nodding. "Before I went under, I heard your desperate voice, I heard you begging for me to stay, and I heard those three beautiful words you said." She paused for a moment, taking in a deep breath, her eyes never leaving his.
"And I love you too." She declared, leaning an inch closer to him. "After all these years, I still love you with all my heart Castle, and I don't think it will ever change." She chuckled, the heat of her breath caressing his skin. She then slowly reacher out to cup his face in her palm, tracing the side of his cheeks. He didn't say anything, he didn't dare to interrupt this beautiful moment, he only swallowed hard as the soft brush of her fingertips made his insides flutter in pleasure.
"Your words were the only thing keeping me alive, Castle. You were the only reason I didn't give up, the only reason I survived." She sniffled, trying to hold back tears. "I was holding onto you the whole time." She confessed on a shallow breath, wiping at her misty eyes.
"So thank you Castle, thank you for everything." And with that, she slanted her mouth over his, drinking all the love from the seam of his lips. He parted his mouth in response without hesitation, letting her eager tongue to delve in, to explore every inch of his insides. She could taste the bitterness of the entire week on his dancing tongue, the remnants of coffe - which he had probably drank to keep himself awake on those restless nights he had endured - and she could feel something else, something which she couldn't quiet define, something which was entirely just him.
"Always, Kate." He panted into her mouth when their lips finally aparted to get some air.
"Always!" He repeated once again in a low and husky voice, tracing his thumb along the slope of her jaw. The contact of their skin made her entire body shiver, and before she could think any further his lips were suddenly moving over hers, pulling her in for another long, passionate kiss. Their tongues found each other again, dancing like they never did before as their lips melted into one, and he couldn't help wondering how he thought he would never get to taste her like this again, how close he actually was to loosing her.
But now they were together, connected in a way none of them knew was even possible, and suddenly all the unnerving thoughts washed away, the entire world faded as her tongue was gently caressing the inside of his mouth, making his body shiver, making his inside flutter.
All their broken pieces were finally fitting together, falling into one, like jagged pieces of puzzle. They were finally together, here and now, alive and breathing, drawn to each other like a magnet. That was all they ever wished for, that was all they needed, that was all that mattered.
Always.
A/N: The next chapter will be the last one. Thanks for reading! :)