Chapter 12: Hannibal's Hungry House

AN: I desided too go bach 2 the main story todey. If uguys went mii 2 do a chapper on another show or game or movie lik yestryday just tell me. WARNING: dis chapper has some cannibelism, so if u dont like dot reed. I hope tim gets eated.

Chapter Eleben Recap!: Flashy and Iraq get maried, Waldo uses some brilliant foreshadowing and gets the speeds, Barkly goes thru portal 2 find Soom, he fites evel versins of his Friends, he gos thorough a buch o dufferent words, he fites tons of Jays, Zum is Tingle, and he telepaths away.

Chaptre beggin!

Link an Navi were sitten on a bench. "Im Hungary!" link zed.

"Okay," replied Navi, "If you're really hungry, we can go pick some fruit off of that tree."

"Ewwwwww! Healthy fods r stuped!" likn lyeld.

Link looked up and saw a restrant. "Letz go ther!"

The sign said that it was called "Hannibal's Hungry House" followed by the tagline, "We serve people every day!"

"I don't think I want to go in there," Navi noted.

"Noncents!" lonk refilled. He grabbed Nazi and Forced her 2 go in 3Hs. Inside was HANNIBLE LECTER! (AN: I forget some stuff aobout him, but i herd adout him in histery class. I think he fot the Romans or somthin and was from Cartilage, a city in Afraca He also likes elyfants.)

"Welcome 2 Hannibal's Hungry House!" said the Carthaginian. "That is actualy short for the resertantes full name. Its relly called Hannibal's Hungry House for Humans to Hang and Have Helpings of Humans and Help Heal their Heartaches, so Hop Here to the Happy Hangout of Hannibal's Hungry House of Hamazing Hammy Hunger Helpers who Have Heaps of Hamstrings and Hearts, so Have a Heartful Hour Here!"

"Thets a hand full 2 say!" sed LInk. "I guess it could just bee called 30 Hs."

"Seriously?" questioned Navi. "Did the author really write that much just for one lame pun?"

"I thought it was F*CKING HILARIOUS!" shrieked Harry from 30 Hs. "It makes me want to take a flaming groinsaw decorated with grenades and women's middle fingers, and shoot it at a galaxy made of toxic fallopian tubes, DESTROYING THE F*CK OUT OF IT!"

"Hey, I told you to stay away from this place!" instructed Handball. "You're too violent, even for me!"

Eventually, Link and Navi were sitting at a table, waiting for their food. "Link, I'm telling you! This guy is a cannibal! He's probably going to feed us humans!"

"Quiet bein sew parinoiad Nav'i. I cant wate anylonger for food!"

Handful brought out a plate and placed it on the table. "I hope you like Italian! First off is a plate of muscles!"

"Did he say muscles or mussels?" asked Navi nervously.

What Navi didn't notice was that Hangeul pulled Link into the meat closet. "Hey," said the Punic commander. "How about we get some 'dessert',"

"Oooooh," said Link sensually.

"I'm going to eat you..."

"Wow," whispered Link, who was extremely turned on. "That's my favorite!"

"I'm going to lick over every single inch..."

Link was in a very special place right now.

"And I'm going to tie you to a pole and roast you over a fire, like you would do to a pig."

Link smiled. "Oooh, kinky!"

"Wait, what?" said Hans. "You know that I'm talking about cannibalizing you, right?"

"Oh!" said Link. "I thought you were talking about sex!" Link and Hanny shared a good laugh.

"Well..." said Hamable, "If sex is what you want, I'd be glad to please you!"

Three Mantis Later:

"Wow, that was fun!" staminated Link.

"Okay, I'm going to eat you now," Hamicable said nonchalantly.

"Oh, yeah. I forgot abot that part."

Homobell locked the door, just as Tingle jumped out! "Hay Link! Its been a while!"

"Tingle and I are working together," said Haydenbowel. "He said that if I capture you, we could both eat you."

"Oh crapp!" crided link. "I forgut to turn off my oven this mornin!"

Meanwhile...Navi just got out of the bathroom, as she had to vomit after witnessing a man eating someone's lungs. "Oh crap!" she gasped. "Where's Link?!"

Navi heard Tingle's voice in the meat closet, so she roundhouse kicked the door open, only to see Tingle and Hannibal about to cut Link open! "Holy f*ck nuggets!" she screamed.

Hangnail and Tingle didn't notice her, as they were to buzzy arguin. "But i want to have the brain," whined Hollowvole. "That's the bestest part!"

"Know weigh! I deserve the drain!"

They were two busy fiting too notice that Julius Caesar just walked in!

"Oh no!" yelled Hungrybowl. "Not a Roman! Screw this, I'm outta here!" He jumped out of the window.

"Im leafin too!" disintogrationed Tingle. "See ya b*tches!"

"Wait..." said Navi, "What is Julius Caesar doing here?"

"I'm not Julia Cesar," salad Caesar. "I'm just playin him in a movie."

"oh okai," siad Lonk. But what Cicero didn't know was that Link had a fetish for ancient Romans! "How about I show u my dagger," Link said suggestively.

"Excuse me?"

"U know, how about i cast my die...inside of u?"

"Huh?"

"I wanna sleep wif u!"

"Oh okay!"

Navi was, of course, grossed out.

That night, Link came, saw, and conquered.

AN: Hear da chapper is! I hop u thoted it was cool! If ther r any characres u want to see later, justtell me in the reviws. and tell mii wat u think of tha chap! Unless its a negativ reviw, if so, then YOU STINK! Timmy mustof put u up to it! Go bach 2 china!