Chapter 33: Fly Me to the Moon
AN: SPACEEEEEEEEEEEE!1111111111111 Da final frontier! An dis is da last cahtar IN SPACE (4 now!) So itll be da Epic concussion of da SPACE chappers! Stay tuned 4 appeases of yere fav SPACE cherecters! Tin wont be there even if he is an alien (GET IT!11111)
Chapter Therdytoo Recap!: Lonk has a wheat dream, Sandwich saevs him, he tingks Seamus is hottie, he wants some luv luv, Status beats him Up, whe shoots him awai, and he dies OR DOES HE?!1111111
Chaptre beggin!
LINK DIED THE END!1111111111111111111111
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JUST KITTING!111111111111111111111111111111111111111
When Sinus shooted him away, he blasted threw SPACE and he landed on Pluto! (AN: The plenet, not the poppy, u silly Groose. GET IT!?111) And on Pulido was a cantina!111
"Wow, Samoas was sew ungreetful! I was gonna sax her up, but shee gotted mad and beatened mii up 4 know raison!"
Lanky walked into the cantina to see who was there. And EVERYONE was there! (Some of whom will possibly return in a later chapter)
There was Kirk and Spock and McChicken and Hulu and Anton Chekhov and Ohura from Ster Track and they were beemed by Scotty if u no what I meen, C3PO and R2D2 and BB8 were twerking, and Kirby was playing monopelly with Meta Knight and King DDD, and EeeTee was on a bicicle and Rosalina was doing the robot with that purple star guy and those robots and the penguins and the Chimp and Fluzzard and those wood guys and some lumas and Capitan Tood and the Shamoo and the bunnee and the beees and Globbergut and th Cursmic Goyed, and Poe and Finn were sexing because they are perfect 4 eatch other, ad Ridley was guarding the Tailor Swift consort, and Alien was giving Predator some babies but in the saxy way, and Mavin the Murshion was macking out with John Connor, and Green Lantern and Supraman and Nova and Thanos and star Lord and Rocket Ratcoon and Groot and Gamera and Drax and Thor and Loki Ch'p and Neil Degrassi Tyson and Space Ghoast and Captain Marvel (the hot gurl one) and the guy one tooo and da new gods and Flesh Gordon and Silfer Surfer and Galactus and they were having an orgy, and Will Robinson was with that robot that yelled danger, and the Pikmen were stripping off Olimar for some fun, and that asshole Mewtwo was taking lives, and Starbomb was the star of the show (AN: GETT IT!111) and space angery birds were using twitter (AN: GETIT!1111) and those Space Jam guys were listening to BotannicSage, and Buzz Lightyear was fiting Master Chef and that Mass effect guy and anyother game space ceracter who I foroted about, and math blaster was blasting math if u no wat I meen, and Jar jar was dying painfully and everyone laughed and skinning him alive and pouring lemon juice on him and burning him alive after cutting off his legs and arms and manly bits and shocking him with electricity and using Chinese water torture but with lemon juice, and Deoxys was making tentacle porm with Elgeum and Beeheum, and the muppets from space, and the space kraken and Goku and the aurum were also tentacling, and dark helmet was breaking the forth wall with a hammer, and Chrom was there for some reason eating fish sticks, and Pit was having a threesome with Mega man and Abraham Lincoln, that rabbit bucky was bunnying and the star fox gang was making an early bird cameo, and firefly peples were firing and flying, and benedict Cumberbatch was being Sherlock and cool and stuff, and Jack harness was humping the coneheads, and Picard was using his psycick powers to mind sex Data and Worf was fiting the guy from babylon 5 and losing, and those Butterstar galactica were having a clothes montage with Q and that docter gye, and Hal9000 was over 9000 (AN: GEDDTI!?111111111111111111111) and every other space character ever was there that I didn't mention, but they were there, just trust me.
Link walked over to Waluigi's Taco Stand which was there for some reason. "Hi, ken I have a taco?"
"Sure thing!" answered Waluigi, who shot the taco like a fastball into Link's mouth. Link looked back, until he saw his very own taco chef, Jorge!1111111
"Whorehey, what r u doin here?"
"Hola, senor! I got a job from Waluigi to work here when he moved to space."
"But Jeorge, y did u abanden mii like that? I thought wii were Friends? I THOUGHT WII WERE Friends?!111111111111111111111"
Link started singing "Total Eclipse of the Heart" to Jorge, before the Mexican chef stopped him.
"Link, this is just a part time thing! I'm still working for you, too!"
"Oh dat maeks mii sooooooooooooo happy!111" Link ran in for a kiss, before someone hammy could be heard walking through the cantina's entrance.
"I need a great hero too help me!" the mysterious man hammed.
"Im a grate hiro!" Lynk conjavorated. "But who r u?"
"My name is John Stalvern and we must KILL THE DEMONS"
Dun dun dun!111
"Wats in it 4 mii?" Link losered.
"GLORY!111111"
"And?"
"Free porn?"
"OKEY!"
And so the duo went to the space station base of the UAC. They knew that there would be demons everywhere. "Where r da deamons?" Link said, imagining himself inside of the hit CW show, Supernatural.
"Quiet! THERE ARE DEMONS EVERYWHERE" John said. "Now this is the plan. Break through the wall and kill the demons or be killed by the demons! On my mark!"
They were almost ready to fight the demons! "This is Waluigi" the radio crackered. "Link, you never paid for your taco."
Link ignored it, and John gotted his palsma rifle and blew up the wall.
"HE GOING TO KILL US" said the demons "I will shoot at him" said the cyberdemon and he fired the rocket missiles. John plasmaed at him and tried to blew him up. But then the ceiling fell and they were trapped and not able to kill. Link was also stuck in the other room and not able to kill.
John was mad. "No! I must kill the demons" he shouted The radio said "No, John. You are the demons"
And then John was a zombie.
Meanwhile, Link was able to kill again and killed the demons and cyberdemons. He used nuclears to blow them up and kill them. Eventually he got to the room that John was in.
"Are u okay Jon?"
"No! I am a zombie and I will eat you!"
Link screamed at the zombie and threw a nuclear at the SPACEships control panel. That made the SPACEstation blow up, sending Link flying through SPACE. But did John survive the explosion? FIND OUT LATER!
Link was blasted all the way to Earth like an asteriod that was a human wearing a green hat and tunic. Luckily, he put on a SPACE suit in the SPACE station so that he wouldn't die. As he was being blasted toward Earth, he saw Sakurai and Fukura floating around. "Water u guys doin around here?"
"Well, we are gods, so we can do whatever we want." Sakurai explained.
"And since we can do whatever we want, we need to make sure to do things that are really cool! Meow!" the cat meowed. "If you could summon a flaming robot ninja alien zombie ghost demon dragon made out of fishsticks, would you? Or course you would!" And so he summoned just that. If Chrom knew what was happening, he'd probably have an orgasm.
"Well, you've been here long enough," Sakurai stated. "Arrivederci!" He snapped his fingers, sending Link flying towards Earth again.
After flying through the atmosphere, he just happened to land in Hyrule.
Meanwhile:
Now that evil Link was gone, Navi could finally focus on stopping Tingle/Ebony/Sara/Everyone. She was working in a cave, doing science to figure out a solution. "It's a good thing Link isn't here, since DAMN IT, I F*CKING JINXED IT!"
She was right, as Link just crashed into Hyrule, creating a massive explosion that blew up the Lost Woods and murdering everyone inside. This made Link super happy. He survived because he landed on a mattress.
Navi eventually got to Link to see if he was hurt. "Link, are you okay?"
"Know, im nut okay Nazi! I gut nothing acurplished on da SPACE trip, and SPACE travel hertz! I dident ghet ani SPACE pwers, I had 2 ifite a zombee, and i got terned down by the sexeh Sanus!"
"Damn," Navi thought. "I know he won't listen if I explain that I tried to warn him, so maybe I should just apologize."
"I'm sorry Link!" she lied.
"I donut forgeev u Na'vi! Uv failed me 1 2 many times! Now dye!"
"WHAT!" Navi shouted.
"Yepsadoodles! Now DEI!" Lonk from Pennsylvania roared like a Piplup.
In a single slice, Link cut her in half.
Dun dun dun!
AN: Well THAT was unexpresseded! Is Nayi really ded, or will she be back later? And what will happen to Link? Will Chrom ever get over his addiction to fishsticks? Will John the zombie return? Is Sara ever going to come out of the closet? Will Dark Yagami take back power? Can someone just tell me the basic story of Final Fantasy so that I can write a chapter about it? PLEASE? Will Ebony and Tingle ever get together? Is Waluigi's Taco Stand going to keep going on forever? Is Tim dumb? Well, of course on the last one, but stay continued, cuz ive got s'more twist comin up!
Next time on Tingles Raveng: The Tingling:
Dark Pit sat on the Empire State Building with Gay Piplup, Bi Oshawott, Pan Poplio, Tom Nook, Benedict Cumberbatch, Dry Bowser, the Dragonball Z Announcer, Ryuk from Death Note, Ghost Pichu, Roy, Other Roy, GeneralDarkPit, MerchantAnna, and Anal. "Hey, do any of you want some Capri Sun?"
"Well, do you want…" Anal took off an mask, to reveal that she was Anna from Frozen! "Do you wanna build a snowman?"
"What the hell?" Gay Piplup piplupped like an Piplip-like Piplup.