Chapter 57: Godfather Talon

AN: Gues wat guoys! I HAVE A SWITCH NOW! (Certainly took you long enough, Nintendo) And Breath of the Wild is just soooooo good! I'm so happy that I can finally play it, and I've been having tons of fun! The only downside is that now that I have the Switch, I can't say "Nintendo Switch, more like Nintendo Bitch, where's my f*cking game." The wait for BotW was definitely worth it. Tim isn't worth anything, as he is just a piece of garbage that can never be loved. I'm sorry for taking so long for this new chapter, but I've just been too busy playing Zelda. I was going to have a Weed Day Special, but I guess I'll make up for it by having Walter make an appearance in the next chapter or something. Also, have you guys seen the HTK's new chapter? If not, THEN READ IT IT'S SO BEEOOTIFUL!

Chapter Fifteysex Recap!: Link is in Link's house, he's in the house, Navi is also in Link's house, Navi is in a cage in Link's house, etc., Link watches da note Shuck, Navel complanes, Lonk is FUNKING PISED, he merders naively, he treays 2 kale tingly, tengo blews them boths up, it was just dream, anavi was in a coma an link is nermal, cdi link, it just dream 2, navi is hapy an link makes link noises, it also just dream 2, Sakkara dream massage, is again also just dream 2, bean there, BITCH YOU GUESSED IT, april fools!

Chaptre beggin!

Agitha was at her buggy shaped house watching her fav porn movie, Bee Movie.

"I'm not related to Barry B. Benson but I wish I was because he's a major f*cking hottie," she said while cuddling her Buzzwole body pillow.

"What da f*ck, are u watching buggy porn again?" said Melon. "Y would you be attracted to someone that ISN'T LINK!11111"

"Eww, that Lonk guy is just messed up. Yesterdai win I was at his house, he just maid prison rape jokes for the entire time an then masturbatened in da bathroom to pictures of Sans Undertale's blue lightsaber dick."

"I know, isn't Link so dreamy?"

"No."

"What...did you just say?" Melanin said evully.

"I said i dont like Lonk. Hes just an asshole and a loser an has tons of STDs an has posters of Hitler's face all over his room and he murders children an one time he burnt down a KFC an he ships Chrom/Lucina an he beats up chillins in weelchairs an he loves da nutshack and he is just terrible in general and kind ofa dick and makes erebus look nice."

"How DARE YOU INSULT MYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY LINKY LONK LUNKU LUKIKUKUIIOKUKUIKU!11111"

"seriusly, is being obsesed with link you're only character trait? Yor basicly just a ripof of cia at dis point but even evuller."

"At least thats better than havin your only personality bean that u have a F*CKING BUG FETISH!"

"That's because IT'S HIP TO F*CK BEES!" sang Adidas. "and HOW DAR U INSULT BUGGY BUG BUGGYUUIURUUFUUJU!"

"To settle this we muts FIOUGHT TO THE DETH!"

Attila pulled out her parasail which was also a lightsaber and Murom pulled out a Molotov cucktail in one hand and chainsaw nunchucks in the other hand and she had a flaming samurai sword in her mouth and her shoes had poison coated knives at the end of them an she also grew killer metal flaming wings.

"NOW WE FITE TO DA DEAF!" thay screamedend and were fite to the deth over lonk an buggies.

After an epicly epic fite that was so epic that it was really cool, a hole city was blowed up an 420 peeps died (AN: Geddity geaucse its weed!) an fineally Musing used her powers to nock Tabitha to da grund and pulled out an ak47 but it was also a rocket lancher an a grenade luncher aswell.

"NoooOOOOOOoooOOo plz dont keel mii! Aren't we related or something?" said Habitat.

"I dunno this story is f*cking confusing. Anyway pREPEARE 2 DEATH!"

"MALON NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" eled agitha in feared.

"MALON YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSS!" Melon yelled while posing like in that one Vietnamese show José's Bazaar Advent.

But then they forgot what they were doing because they're all really stupid and went home to watch some tv.

LATER:

Agitha went to go look for bugs to haf da sexy tim with an so she left to leave an Salon went home 2 da farm which was da headkarters of da mafia an her dad was da Gudfather of da Arrividercci family. Her dad was named Talon which sounds alot like malon so it might be confusing having him be in the story two long because of the constant misspellings that will make it hard too tell the two apart alot.

Aniway, godfather Tarin was doin his dogfather busines stuff like usual an he was talking to some other Italian guy. "Godfater," saided da Hetalian kissing Talus's ring. "There's-a person that is threatening my daughter-a and i-a need for-a u to stop-a him!"

"Don't-a worry! I'll-a make an offer he can't-a refuse! I'll-a send him LOTSA SPAGHETTI! There's-a no way-a for him to refuse-a that!"

"Hiiiii daddyyyy" sed Moran.

"Bonjorno my-a lovley-a daughter-a!" exclaimed Talonflame all italiany. "I have-a some great news! You're gonna get-a married! I'm-a arranging you a marriage with the son from another-a crime family!

"Wait, WHAT!? BUT THAT ISN'T LINKOLJKIK!" screamed Magnus at the tip of her longs.

"That-a doesn't matter! You-a need to get-a over that-a Link guy! He's-a really bad-a influence!"

"F*CK YOU DAD YOU F*CKING OLD WRINKLY C*NT F*CKER F*CK F*CK F*CK YOU, YOU F*CKING BITCH, EAT A F*CKING DICK YOU LITTLE BASTARD F*CK YOU ASSHOLE F*CKING SHIT-FACED BITCH! F*CK YOU YOU-!"

"Mama mia, that's-a some-a spicy language! You-a need to watch-a your-a bocca!"

"No u need to WATCH YERE F*KIN NBACK OR YULE FIND A NIFE IN IT THAT WILL KIL U YU OLD ITALIAN C*NT! F*CK U FCK F*CKER F*CKING F*CK F*CKD *CIFKDF F*CK YOU!11111111111"

Den Mahjong left 2 get raveng (AN: GEDITLIKEDATITLEOFDASTORYHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAFUNNY!) on her godfather father, an she nu juts ho to turnip 2.

Latitude:

Ingo was doin al da werk an he was mad becase he wanted 2 be da goodfather but he was farced 2 do all da farmwerk insted. Milton wanked up and eked "Wats rong, have you got that mood Ingo?" and the audience laughed because it was actually a very clever joke that most you probably won't get, BUT IT ACTUALLY IS A FUNNY JOKE THIS TIME, GUYS!

"I'm-a f*cking pissed-a! That-a bastard Talon makes-a me do all-a the work-a here, but he does-a nothing and-a still getsa to be-a the godafather!"

"I hate that old slut 2. Let's take care of him once and for all!" seda Moran.

"And YOU gotta help us!" Dingo sed lonking at the audienc.

"Who da fu* r u talking to?"

(AN: BEST 4TH VALL BRAKE EVER WYA BETTER THAN THE ONE IN THE HTKS NEW CHAPTER [THAT WAS A JOKE PLEASE DONT HATE ME mERCH AND GEN]!)

Letterman:

Tulum was at his godpadre house an doin stuff like that when Wendigo jumped up behind him and started chocking him to death with lotsa spaghetti!

"Ingo!" breathed Talon while beain choked 2 deth wif da spagetti. "What-a are you-a doing, Ingo!"

"That's-a the Godmother to you, Talon!" exclammed ingo finishin him off.

Liter:

"thank-a you for helpin mii killin Totem so-a i could be-a the Godmother!" sed Ringo.

"no probremeo!" excemmeld Mallon. "Hay ken i join u on da godfather stuffles?"

"No-a way, you're a woman and-a you can't getta involved in-a my business! Now go-a an-a make-a me a sandwitch!"

"K!" sed Moblin twisting out da door like a flying fox. Then when she got out the door she pressed a baton and the house exploded, killing Ingo!

"hahahah dat was my plan all along! NOW I AM THE GODFATHER AN LINK CAN FINALLY BE MY BITCH HAHAHAHAHA!"

Melon is one messed up dude.

"hahaha evil," she whispered like moldy bread just as Blud did in the fanfic Light and Dark the Adventures of Dark Yagami which is a better story than this, you should be reading it instead.

Lighter: 9(AN: GEYUIT BECAUSE PREVIOUSLY IN THE PREVIOUS SENTENSE I MENSIONED THE STORY ABOUT LIGHT YAGAMI AND INSTEAD OF SAYING LATER I SAID LIGHTER WHICH SOUNDS LIKE LIGHT!111)

Agitha was wanking more buggy porno lik Antz and A Bugs Life WHEN DA NEWS CAME ON! The news guy wasnt batman but he was Batmans' cousin named Batcousin. "Danking news!" (AN: Gddit becuser itsalmost weed gay!?) "Someone stole a bunches of nukes from Cuba and is starting the 2nd Cuban missle crisis an will use da nukes 2 blow up all the bugs in hyrule!"

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!1111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111" screamed Agitha because she's darth vaer. "Ive gut to stop all my buggy sex frends from dying and SAVE THE BUGS! Malign letz teem up an storp dat commonist wantin to kil my buggies!"

"No way liek i giv a f*k aboot bugs! I half butter tangs 2 dew!"

"F*ck you my strange and violent relative of unknown relation with an unhealthy obsession with a certain green-wearing sociopath."

So Moorhen lefted 2 dew evul stuff s cas bshes evil and stuff and Aguish had una idea.

"I no ill find some other peeps and well all team up TO SAVE THE BUGS!" and then she posed and was going to find some toher peeps to team up and Save the bugs so the bugs won't die and they'll form a team to save the bugs. justin trudeau

AN: Da tiz iit for todai! Sori aboot it takning sew lung 4 da new chip, but hopefull y ill post a nother chapter befo long! And bee sure 2 reed da new Hot Topic Krew chapter, or i will beat you worse than i beat tim in my dreams. Also, happy birthday Lucina! Lucina's bunny costume made all of my waifu dreams come true. Also, happy Weed Day! Just so you know DRUGS ARE BAD SO DONT DO THEM unless you're Timmy then you can do them as much as you want and then be killed by them.