Chapter 62: Link's True Love

AN: Hay IM BACK (again). I will be leaving next week though, but I'll attempt to post another chappyter by then. Also, I've finished Breath of the Wild! Now that I've completed the game, I'm going to try to post a chapter about it soon. Sometime I'll also have to post a chapter about KILLING TIM THAT F*CKING BITCH!

Chapter Sextywon Recap!: Sutra rights store aboot Homophones, she hats trains gendered, nees gooms, Hes acturally sen overtale, snes trees 2 kul jer, Vase Precedint Prince saves the day, the HTK reeds da store, polands 2 beat sara, Pit luvs cananada, O CANADA OUR HOME AND NATIVE LAND, Trudeau is my husbando, PLAN 2 DESTROY CHICA PHILLY!

Chaptre beggin!

One day lonk was eetin at croms restrant, Chroms Fishy Fishsticks, when suddenly, 2 spooky scary skeletons wanked in!

"SANS, WHY IS EVERYONE LOOKING AT US LIKE THAT? HAVE THEY JUST NEVER MET ANYONE AS COOL AS ME BEFORE?"

"Your kind isn't welcome here," said the waiter, pointing at a sign that read, "NO SHITTY UNDERTALE ALLOWED!"

"it's okay, bro. i heard that this place wasn't good anyways."

As they walked out, the crowd began booing them. "Undertale is f*cking dead!" screamed some dude.

"WAIT, DID HE SAY THAT UNDERTALE IS...DEAD? IS IT TRUE?"

"no, paps. he was just joking," said snas, but secretly he was crying inside.

"wata f*nikn loosre," said Lonk.

"I know, right?" said an british woman standing nearby. "They should be made into slaves, just like anyone that isn't white, as well as all children."

After hearign the woman declare such a sexy statement, Link locked eyes with her. She was the most beautiful woman that Lonk had ever seen. "Im link and i agree i hate nonwhites children an evryon that doesent agre with mii!"

The mysterious woman seemed infatuated with him. "My name is Dolores Umbridge. It is very nice to finally meet someone that shares my wonderful world views. Would you maybe...like to go burn down an orphanage with me?"

"Sounds luke a lot of fuun!" And so they skipped off holding hands.

LAYTER:

"Dolores umbrige is a milf," said Link. "Umbrige, moar like CUMbridge HAHAHAHHAHAAHAHAHAHA!"

"What the f*ck?" said Navi in horror.

"Nice job mann," sed Old Man hifiving Lonlk.

"man i knew that chick from back in hogwards and shes FINE!" sed Snap.

"Whin im not sleeping with teenaged girls an middleaged men, i only sleep with old womans," sed loopin.

wft is wrong ith these people?

"What the f*ck is wrong with these people?" said Navi.

I know rite?

MEMEWHILE:

"Godfather, I have some news for you," said some dude in a 40s gangster outfit.

"Tell me immediately or you'll be sent to my death camp," said Godfather Melencamp. (ANB: GEDTIT!)

"It seems that Lonk is dating a woman named Delorus Rumbrige."

"He did WHAT?!" she said, stabbing the dude in the eye. "THAT BITCHIS GOONA DIE!"

"hasnt this same thing happened a million times in this story already," said someone else, so Molo killed them 2.

Letterman:

"An then I tortured this annoying kid because he yelled at me for making fun of his dead parents!"

"Ahaha! What a story, Deloris." tengo sed Lync

"Do you want to hear a story about the time that I stuffed a child into a washing machine and turned it on?"

"OMG YAAAS that sounds really hot!"

wtf?

And so there was a montage of Lonk and Umbitch doing things like robbing banks, smashing puppies with sledgehammers, and putting children in bags and throwing them into a river.

Fiddler:

"Today was very fun!" said Umbrigade. "We should murder innocents again sometime."

"Mhmh." said Link staring at her bobs.

Then sudanly, Molli jumped in with a magical killer arm! "DIE UMBITCH!"

"Hi melon."

"Hi lonk."

"im goonna kill this slut."

"ok."

"What the bloody hell, Link! You're just going to let her kill me?"

"Yep death is funny also im a sociopath goodbye"

And so Chalon shooted a murder beam at Umbridge, and she began to melt.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111" screamed Umbritch as she slowly and painfully melted. LInk watched in enjoyment as her skin melted off, and her tempatures reacheded such high levuls that even her skerlaten began to melt. Malon also used her powers to make it so that she could still feel pain with her body melting. By this point, she was nothing put a pile of goop, but could feel everything. Umbridge had no mouth and must scream. Finally, after a few hours of unending pain worse than could ever be felt by anyone else in the world, Melon finally put her out of her Missouri, and no one missed her.

"WoW that was reely HET!" vocaloid Chink. Mahjong, i half 2 tel u someting!"

"Yes, Link?" asked Malaria.

"I have 2 go masticate by."

As Lonky left Galon standed their in angered. "That...F*CKING C*NT F*CK YOU F*CK YOU F*CK YOU F*CK YOU F*CK YOU F*CK YOU!1111111111111111111111111111" and she was so mad that she flew to Singapore and blowed it up.

Manewheel:

THe Tingling Sunstation uwas hangin out in their hideout with their newest member...Nico Yazawa! She was formerly part of a popular Japanese idol group called μ's, but the group disbanded after member Nozomi was arrested for groping a lot of girl's boobs. Nico since joined the Mafia and decided to become a part of tingles team.

"What the f*ck is this weeb doing here," complained Ben. "We already have two lame anime characters on this team."

"F*CK ANIME!" screamed Moe.

"Yeah, f*ck you too," said Nico.

Suddenly Hannibal karate chopped the door off and ran over to Nico. "NICO I'M YOUR BIGGEST FAN AND NOW YOU'RE ON MY TEAM OMG I LOVE YOU!1111"

"F*ck off, creep," said Nico.

"Hey hey hey hey hey hey Nico can you say your catchphrase for me please please please!"

"I will if you give me 50 bucks."

"Okay!"

"Wait, you're serious? Okay, here it comes." She quickly got into character and posed, saying, "Nico Nico Nii~!"

"Dawwwwww," said everyone.

"Okay, bitch; where's my money."

"Here you go," said Hannibal, handing her some muns. "You're just sooooo cute! I could eat you right up!" Hannibal took out a knife as Nico screamed and ran from the cannibal in terror.

AN: Well, that was a weird chapter. Now that I've added a new member to the team, I'll have to update the image showing the entire roster of the Tingling Sensation. Also, I'm adding a new poll to my fanfiction dot net page: who is your favorite member of the Tingling Sensation? (not counting Tingle) If tim was a member, he'd get last place. Be sure to vote, and I'll see you gyhus soon! ALso Umi is waifu.