Rey tore off the yellow dress and slipped into her standard white outfit before the bond had the chance to connect them at an awkward moment, this time to the expense of her dignity.
She couldn't get the look of his face when he saw her out of her mind.
He had been stunned silent. His jaw dropped to the floor. His beautiful dark eyes didn't dare to blink. She gave a small smile thinking about how his cheeks went red.
While the dress had been impractical, she'd be lying if she said she hated it. She loved the flowy fabric. It didn't feel restricting like she expected an elaborate dress to be. The colors had been lovely. She was so used to the rugged and dirty colors on Jakku and now within the resistance, the bright colors on the dress stood out but in a glorious way.
But after seeing his reaction, she couldn't bare to wear it.
She threw herself onto the cot within the Falcon.
"Did you see the way he looked at you?" Padme said, squeezing Rey's arm lovingly. "If you'd given him a twirl he probably would have fainted."
"Mom, give it a rest." Leia said, sitting next to Rey.
"I'm just saying to never underestimate the power a woman can have over a man."
"My son is not a man." Leia said, helping Rey pull the purple headbands out of her hair. "Neither was my husband half the time. Real men don't kill or rule over other men."
"Ok well then he's a very tall boy." Padme corrected herself. "But either way, if looks could slay…"
"I don't think that's what that saying means." Rey grumbled, loving the feeling of Leia brushing through her hair like a mother would do to her daughter. "Why are you pushing so hard for this anyways?"
"When Anakin became Vader," Padme said, her voice shifting from excited and happy to remorseful. "I couldn't sense any light or love in him. Just darkness and hatred."
She looked dramatically off into the distance.
"But when I look at Kylo," Padme said, "I see light and love. Faint. But it's there. Ben Solo is in there, fighting so hard to get out."
Padme looked back at Rey and then to her daughter and then back to Rey.
"I know it sounds like I'm trying to live through you," Padme said, putting her hand to Leia's face, "But you have a chance-one that I never had. It's not your responsibility to fix him. He has to save himself. My husband may say that it was Luke that saved him, but it wasn't. Anakin had to save himself. Luke just helped him realize that. My brave little boy…"
Rey loved Padme's smile. She had this aura of motherly affection. Leia had it to, but this one was different. Padme never had the chance to raise her kids, allowing her to fantasize what it was like and strive to be overly motherly every chance she got to see her kids.
"I should talk to him soon." Padme said sadly. "I haven't talked to him much...if at all."
"Good to know I'm the favorite." Leia said, smirking up at her mom.
Padme rolled her eyes and smiled.
"You think there's a chance?" Rey asked.
"I think you know there's a chance." Padme corrected, a playful smile taking hold of her face. "You can't change him, but there's nothing wrong with giving him some motivation to get his act together."
Rey loved her rather dubious smile.
"What did you have in mind?" Rey said, giving Padme the same smile.
…
Kylo took the time to mope after the most recent rejection. He was face down on his bed, his sheets being the only black thing in the room. He wasn't sure when his design team decided to paint the walls a garish white, but it must have happened at some point because that's what they were now. He couldn't figure out where the light switch was in the room. Part of him thought the lights were off and he just wasn't used to seeing the color white that it just looked bright to him.
No matter, instead of fixing the problem, he just decided to sleep facing down, his arms wrapped tightly around a pillow.
Sometimes he'd imagine that it was Rey he was holding and not his Darth Vader themed bedding.
Man he was pathetic.
He felt the familiar buzz of their 'Force bond' or 'Force portal' or whatever was being put to use that this point (truth be told he wasn't sure how any of this worked and every time he tried to think about it his head hurt) and then he gave a groan.
He knew he looked a mess. He hadn't taken a shower after being put in carbonite. His hair was still greasy and was sticking up in places. Not to mention his eyes were red and puffy. He did not want Rey to see him like this. He hoped that if he just pretended he was asleep, she would go away.
15 minutes passed and he still felt Rey's presence a little ways away.
"Rey," Kylo finally said, grumbling into his pillow and hoping she heard him. "I'd rather not do this now. Could you-could you come back in like an hour or so?"
"Huh?" Rey said, her voice sounding sweeter than normal.
"Could you leave?"
"I can't hear you. Get your face out of that pillow."
Kylo grudgingly removed his head from his pillow.
"I said could you come back lat…"
His voice died when he saw her. She had looked breathtaking earlier- an absolute goddess. Her current outfit made his jaw drop as well, but this was for a completely different reason. Instead of wearing the colors of a sunset, she was wearing that was darker than the night sky. The tight leather black dress had a long beading piece that started from her neck and hit the floor. He could have sworn that his grandmother had worn it, but he did not remember those two large slits going up her leg. Thank goodness she was wearing a shawl over the top of it. He wasn't sure if he could handle seeing her shoulders.
"What is it, Ben?" Rey asked, batting her eyelashes.
Was she wearing eye shadow? He'd have to ask her later how she got that gorgeous smokey eye. You know, if he was able to form a sentence.
"Uh ah uhhh…" Kylo swallowed, running his hands through his hair, trying to fix it.
"What's wrong?" Rey asked, standing up from where she was sitting. "Did the carbonite have negative effects? Are you hot? It is a bit hot in here."
Rey untied the shawl that was covering her top and Kylo had to look away. He trusted himself for a few seconds to peer through his fingers but then instantly hid behind his hands again in free that his thoughts would change the rating.
She sat down next to him, her thigh pressing against his.
Now he knew he was dreaming.
She pressed her hand against his, tearing it away from his eyes, forcing him to look at her.
Wake up wake up wake up.
"What's wrong, darling?"
Wakeupwakeupwakeupwakeupwakeupwakeupwakeupwakeup.
Force she was stunning.
"Are you warm, dearest?" Rey said, touching his forehead. "Her cheeks and ears are redder that your saber."
She was playing with his hair, brushing it away from his face. She bent down as if to plant a kiss on his cheek.
He stood up abruptly.
"Nope," Kylo said, pacing back and forth while Rey watched completely amused. "Nope nope nope this isn't happening. I just hit my head really hard or Luke's playing a prank on me or something."
"Quit being over dramatic." Rey said, patting the place beside her.
Kylo really wanted to obey her command. Every nerve in his body was screaming at him to sit down beside her. Force, he wanted to kiss her. No...no he wanted HER to kiss him. If she did that, he'd certainly die.
"Nope." He turned away from the temptress and fixing his eyes on the stars outside his window. "Not falling for it."
Rey sighed sadly.
"It's ok." Rey said, brushing her brown hair into her face. Force, he could smell her sweet vanilla lotion from a planet away. "I'm used to people leaving me."
There it was.
"Rey," Kylo said, his tongue getting twisted in his mouth. "I don't...I'm not... You're just so… uhh."
"The base is so lonely." Rey said, playing with the folds of the leather dress. "I'm the only force user on base. Everyone is treating me like a legend. Finn's been busy with Rose and I think Poe's planning to take me to divorce court for the right to BB-8. Man's he loves that droid…"
'Go with her!' his brain was screaming at him. 'Go with her! Make sure she's never lonely again! Follow her to the ends of the galaxy if she asks!'
"I wish there was someone there who understood all of this." Rey said, Kylo still facing the stars as to not give away his small smile. "Someone to take my hand when I need it."
'Do whatever she asks! Be by her side no matter the cost!'
"Ben, please? All I want is your love. You're a good person-I know it. Come away with me. Leave everything else behind while we still can."
Oh her voice was like velvet.
He turned to face her. He walked towards her, kneeling in front of her. She was leaning a bit against the bed, her hazel eyes locking with his own.
Force, he wanted their kids to have her eyes.
Where the heck did that come from?
He had barely even touched her hand. There kisses didn't even count yet since he had stolen them. But now he couldn't get the idea out of his head. 4 or 5 kids all with her amber eyes and maybe his dark hair. A daughter. Yes. He wanted a daughter with her light eyes and his dark hair.
She offered her hand to him. He took it and gently pressed his lips against it.
'She can't have kids in the resistance' a dark voice whispered in his head. 'It wouldn't be safe. She'd be killed.'
"Ben?" Rey asked, sensing the dark shift. "Ben what's wrong?"
"Stay with me." He begged. "If you're lonely among the resistance, leave. I would never leave you. You'd never be lonely."
He tried to kiss her hand again, but she snatched it from him. She stood up and released an angry huff.
"Rey, don't you see?" Kylo said, standing up-he never really understood how much larger he was than her at that moment. "You don't have to live alone anymore. I've overthrown Snoke. Together, you and I can rule the galaxy. Make things the way we want them to be."
"I would like to say I can't believe what I'm hearing." Rey said backing away from him but he kept getting closer. "Padme was wrong- you can't be changed."
"I don't want to hear anything that my family has said." Kylo spat angrily. "They turned against me. Don't you dare turn against me."
"I don't know you." Rey spat back. "I can't follow you down that path. It would break me. And you."
"Because of them? Because of that pitiful resistance."
"Because of you! Because of what you've done! What you plan to do!"
"You know, the last time these lines were said, the lady in question was pregnant with twins."
Kylo raised his eyebrows and gave a wicked smile. He had backed her against a wall. She felt around for something to grab. She could barely move in this dress, let alone fight hand to hand.
"Never." She spat in his face.
He wiped off her spit and then placed his hand on the wall above her head.
"Liar!" He screamed down her throat.
She refused to tremble. She refused to be intimidated by him. She would fight him tooth and nail than submit to him.
"Are you going to choke me." She said with no fear in her voice.
The voices in his head were screaming at him to do so. Thousands of dark voices were overlapping in his brain, tearing his skull apart in rage and aggression.
'Just knock her out...'
'Make her fear you...'
'Make sure she never leaves…'
'She'll submit…'
'She'll take her place at her side…'
'You'll make her take her place at her side…'
'Imagine her on her lap as you sit in that throne…'
'She'll learn to love you…'
'She'll learn to love the children the two of you would have…'
'Think of their power…'
'Think of the love she would give them…'
'They love she would give you…'
'Imagine waking up beside her…'
'Just strangle her…'
'Snuff out her light for a brief moment...and she'll be yours…'
'Take her…'
'Steal her…'
'She belongs to you…'
He raised his hand, ready to crush her throat. That's all it would take, and she'd be his.
Then he saw it.
She had a tear out of the corner of her eye.
She had heard everything in his head. It had made her cry. He had made her cry.
He backed away from her as if he had been burned. She was still pressed against the wall.
"Rey…" Kylo said, looking at his hand in horror. "Rey...Rey I'm...I'm so sorry. I would never. You have to believe me. I would never...I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to-I'm sorry. Please. Believe me when I say I'm sorry."
She said nothing.
He blinked for an instant and she was gone.