The walk to the headmaster's office seems to go on forever. What exactly does he want with you? You wish you'd had the good sense of mind to ask him that a moment ago, but you were so surprised to see him that shock stilled your tongue! Still, it would only have raised suspicion if you had pestered him. Better to feel anxious than to give him a reason to question your validity as a student…
Taking a deep breath (something that seems to be a common occurrence at this point), you do your best to walk to your destination with your head held high. All he knows about you is that you're a dedicated student, with consistent grades, who isn't above seeing tuition to better improve yourself. Really, you're every headmaster's dream student. In fact, he probably wants to talk to you about your future or something. Maybe he's heard of a few apprenticeships in London that he thinks you'll suit? The man is probably trying to do you a favour! You have no reason to believe that he knows your secret. You're just being paranoid!
Unfortunately, you're so distracted by your thoughts that you manage to walk straight into the headmaster's door, your head generating a loud thump on the solid wood.
As you rub the newly-formed sore patch on your forehead, a voice calls out from the office. 'Come in if you're expected. If you're not, kindly speak to the deputy head instead; I'm in no mood to entertain unexpected guests.' Well, that's rather rude. What if a student desperately needs to see him? Then again, the vice head does seem to deal with most things these days…
As you are in fact expected, you enter the office, and take your hand away from the bump on your head. The last thing you want is to draw attention to it, especially given how you injured it; you'd hate to have to confess that your mind was so distant, the physical world seemed to disappear.
The Headmaster is currently day behind his desk, his eyes pouring over pile upon pile of paperwork. When he hears his door open, his eyes flash up, and a slight smile appears on his lips.
He maintains his smile as he speaks. 'Ah, you remembered to pay me a visit, I see. Please, take a seat. I promise this won't take long.' He gestures to a seat across the desk from his own, and you sit as indicated, but not before closing the door behind you; he seems the type of man who would prefer privacy during his meetings.
As soon as you've taken your seat, the Headmaster continues talking. 'So, taking extra Latin lessons from Mr Michaelis, are we? That's a fantastic attitude, one I wish all of my students had. Would you mind if I tried my hand at testing you? I find that nothing helps one to retain knowledge like repetition!' Is he for real? This can't be why he called you here! He didn't even bloody know that you'd planned to take extra lessons! Unless he decided to invite you on a whim? At this point, you're not sure you'd put such a thing past him!
Nevertheless, it's probably best to comply. After all, if he's speaking Latin to you, at least he's not questioning your gender!
You give him a curt nod. 'Of course, Sir. I would greatly appreciate the practice.' This is where he used a whole slew of phrases that you've never heard before…
The Headmaster looks thoughtful for a few seconds before speaking. 'Okay, we'll start off easy. Translate 'absolutum dominium' into English for me.' Wow, he really is starting off easy.
Your mouth forms a confident smile. 'That means 'absolute dominion', Sir. That is to say, complete dominion over something, like you have dominion over this school, and it's pupils to a certain extent.' You internally cringe; could you be any more of a sycophant?
Still, the Headmaster seems pleased with your answer. 'A perfect translation. Let me try something more difficult… mmm… alright, 'alea iacta est'.' That one certainly is more difficult, but it's nothing you can't handle.
'It means 'the die is cast', Sir. Like the die of fate, I suppose.' It's a difficult thing to explain, but he didn't actually ask for an explanation, just a translation.
A thoughtful hum escapes the Headmaster. 'So, you're a believer in fate then? Not one for divinity? You don't think that maybe there are beings in our world that are more than human?' That's an interesting question, one you really don't know how to answer.
Instead of engaging him in philosophical debate, to take the opportunity to show off. ''Haud ignota loquor', Sir. I'm sorry.'
The Headmaster hurts out laughing. 'My, what a witty pupil I have! I suppose one shouldn't speak of things that are unknown. Then again, what in this world is truly unknown? After all, 'acta deos numquam mortalia fallunt'. There is always someone who knows the truth of everything, therefore nothing can be unknown. Wouldn't you agree, my dear Alumna?' Your blood runs cold. 'Alumna'? Female pupil? He knows! Oh God, he knows! How? Did someone tell him? Did he examine your entrance papers and find a discrepancy? All these years of heard work, gone in an instant!
No, no way. This is not how you're found out. After what you have allowed the Housemaster to do to you for the sake of secrecy, there is no way you're faltering here!
Feigning confidence, you say the first thing that comes into your head. 'I fear I must correct your Latin, Sir. You used the incorrect word for pupil. I am an alumnus, not an alumna.' This is it, the moment of truth. Will he push his point?
There's a moment of tense silence, before the Headmaster breaks it. 'My sincere apologies, dear boy. My Latin must be rustier than I'd thought. Perhaps I should have you tutor me? Would that be a strange suggestion?' Your heart feels like it's about to drop out of your ass. You really pulled that off! It was just a common mistake! What a relief!
The smile you give to the Headmaster is sincere. ''Homo sum humani a me nihil alienum puto', Sir, and I think to pursue knowledge is a most human intent.' You only wish you knew about the Headmaster's intent. You still don't know why you were summoned here.
That comment earns you a grin. 'Indeed, and 'cogitationis poenam nemo patitur'. Not that I'm suggesting you would punish me for my intent; I am the one with 'absolutum dominium', after all. However, I could punish you for attempting to find inappropriate materials in the library last week. Honestly, understand that men have needs as much as anyone, but searching for such illicit material is really not appropriate. The only reason I have yet to do so is because I am a fan of the old adage 'actus non facit reum nisi mens sit rea', and I have no idea if your mind is guilty of the lewd thoughts I assume it to be. So tell me, why were you trying to find detailed descriptions of female anatomy?' Oh. So that's why you're here? Well, at least that's easy to talk your way out of…
Putting on your finest look of contrition, you do your best to fabricate an answer. 'It was just curiosity, Sir. I mean, all of us here are taught biology, but no one has touched on the anatomy of the living. I'm just curious as to what women look like… down below… so that one day, when I marry, I won't be surprised by what I see. After all, I'm certain that a woman's intimate area is far different from my own. That's the only reason, Sir; I just want to know what to expect.' That seems a reasonable response, one you're hoping he'll believe. It's not like you can say 'I'm sorry, it's just that Housemaster Michaelis wanted me to memorise all the bits of my own genitals. He tried testing me on them, by the way. I couldn't remember any of them thanks to being denied at the library, and I almost ended up having a pole shoved into my…'
Your train of thought is interrupted by the Headmaster. 'I see. Well, I can't say I blame you. There's not a man around who hasn't found himself curious as to the workings of the female anatomy. I myself have studied it at length and up close, although you're not in a position that allows for the practical exploration of another woman's genitals. Or rather, a woman's genitals.' The Headmaster rises from his chair, and heads over to a nearby bookcase. He pulls out a rather dusty-looking book from the shelf, and hands it to you. As you look at the cover, you almost drop it in shock. Is that…?
The Headmaster smirks. 'I know that 'The Karma Sutra' hardly counts as an anatomical text, but if your aim is to understand sexual desire and how best to please your future wife, then this is the book for you. I'll have to ask that you keep it hidden as best you can, but that book is yours to keep. Consider it my way of passing on knowledge to one of my brightest pupils. I'm sure you'll find it a most engrossing read.' Your face starts to burn, a violent blush consuming it entirely before it moves on to cover your neck. You've never been more embarrassed in your life! Your headmaster has just handed you a book full of sex! What do you even say to that?!
All you can do is give him a curt nod. 'Thank you, Sir. This is most kind of you. I shall study the tome as soon as I am able.' You hope he lets you go now that he has his answer. If this conversation goes any further, you're going to need a week-long cold shower, and a complete mental wipe.
Unfortunately, the Headmaster isn't finished just yet. 'I remember when I was your age. Ah, the things I used to do to myself in my own bedchamber. I used to dream of pretty women in nothing but their smalls, their firm breasts on full display. Oh, how the men of our age have lost appreciation for such things. Most men prefer to take their wives while they are still mostly clothed, still so prude even in private. I just can't imagine not having a nice pair of breasts to stare at when I make love. So soft, so firm, so enticingly female…' He places his hands on your shoulders, and your heart begins to speed up. His hands feel unbearably warm, even through your clothes, and his words… you resent not reaching climax at the hands of your Housemaster a moment ago. As it is, your body is so desperately frustrated that you'd give anything to for a little stimulation. Maybe your headmaster would give it to you, if you told him your secret…
No sooner than you think that, the Headmaster takes his hands off of you, before returning to his seat behind the desk.
He clears his throat. 'I'm sorry about that. I got carried away. Perhaps I am the one who needs reprimanding after all. It's just been so long since I felt the soft flesh of a woman beneath me… it drives a man to distraction, you know? Men will do almost anything to bed a woman. They'll use money, prestige, blackmail… there really is nothing we won't stoop to.
'Anyway, that's quite enough of that I think. I'm sure you must be eager to return to your studies. You are free to leave.' You should be relieved, but there's something in his speech that has you curious.
Making no attempt to move, you decide to ask something. 'Forgive me, Sir, but I must ask; why do men seek out sex? Surely it can't be worth sacrificing morality and credibility for?' That said, you've given up your credibility and morality by sleeping with your Housemaster, even if it is an act of circumstantial necessity.
The Headmaster takes a moment to think before answering. 'It depends. Sometimes the act itself isn't the real appeal. As pleasurable as it is to sink yourself inside a woman's gentle heat, few people do it for that feeling alone. Most commonly, it is done when two people are in love, as a way of affirming it. I'm sure I don't need to explain why that would be pleasurable; it's human nature to want to be connected so intimately with another. Humans are sociable creatures by nature, and therefore crave making connections with others. To that end, sex is a wonderful thing.
'For some, sex is only desired for one reason; procreation. In our age, as I'm sure you're already aware, noblemen desire heirs more than anything else. To produce a son, men will sleep with their woman as often as possible, in the hopes that nature shall grant them what they want. Should they fail, it is not uncommon for them to seek out other potential 'vessels' for their young. They will do anything to ensure their bloodline remains.
'Then you have the other main group, which I'm going to clump into one just to spare you from a lecture. They are the men who use sex for power and control. They have sex not because they want it or because they enjoy it, but because they can. They find themselves a woman that they see as weak, and they force them to have sex just to prove that they are more powerful. They think that shoving themselves into a woman gives them dominion over her, the same way that dogs try to hump the human members of the household. These men have to be the top dog, no matter what. It is best that women avoid such men.
'I suppose that there are men who just want sex for the feeling, but they're not hugely common. If only men and women were allowed more carnal freedom. Anyway, I hope that I've been of some help. As your headmaster, it does seem rather inappropriate to tell you all this, Alumna. Still, I'll keep it secret if you will.' He winks at you, and you begin to grow confused. He almost sounds like your Housemaster does…
You decide to leave quickly, as to avoid revealing something you shouldn't. You can't help one finally bit of showing off though…
You stand, clutching the book at your side. Before you leave though, you say one last thing to your headmaster. 'Vale, Sir.' You incline your head forward instead of bowing.
The Headmaster does the same, before grinning at you… salaciously? You really can't tell…
''Sed domi maneas paresque nobis novem continuas fututiones.'' You stare at him questioningly. 'You'll find out what that means soon enough, I promise. See you soon.' He giggles, and you rush out of the office, your cheeks still warm from your earlier embarrassment.
As you head back to your dorm, you think on the day's events. Stretched out by your housemaster, embarrassed by the headmaster… and yet, nothing has been gained from either one, other than intense sexual frustration and acute paranoia. That, and you're banned from touching yourself, despite having the best possible material to pleasure yourself with. Life can be so unfair…
You drop the book off at the dorm before heading off for the coldest shower possible.