AU: HELLO HELLO! So this is a BRAND NEW chapter. I've never posted this chapter the first time around, even though I had it all types up. So I'll be updating every single Thursday morning/afternoon. Depending on when I wake up from my nap =)

Disclaimer: I do not own Degrassi: The Next Generation nor its characters or specific plot lines. I am just a gender nonconformity girl that enjoys writing.

Dear God, hi it's me, Jordan. I know it's been awhile. You and I had that disagreement a few years back and just drifted apart. I guess your number got deleted from my phone, sorry about that. I'm just reaching out to you because I have a question. ARE YOU FUCKING PUNISHING ME OR WHAT?!

Jay is still smiling at me the way creepy men like to do to women. It's very weird and gives me the urge to kick him in the balls.

"Well," I start. "Isn't this… I can't find the right words to use at the moment."

"Grand?" Jay asks.

"I mean, that's A word."

I walk past them into the classroom and grab a seat. They walk into the classroom and I see Mr. Perino become instantly annoyed as he rolls his eyes at the sight of them.

"Maybe this semester you two could actually learn and pass the class," he says.

Jay raises his hands up as if he's being arrested by the cops. Ya know what, something tells me that Jay has definitely has some run-ins with the law. He just seems like that type of guy.

"I make no promises Mr. P," Jay says.

Mr. Perino points at them. "Don't even think about sitting beside each other," he says sternly.

Alex gives Mr. Perino a bitchy smile and, now she's flicking him off as soon as he turned his back. This should be a fun class.

The two are walking down the aisles on either side of me and I'm not liking what I think is about to happen. Alex takes the seat to my left, while Jay sits in the seat on my right. I believe this is what scientists would call a hell sandwich.

"Not to be THAT person," I start. "But I believe Mr. Perino told you two NOT to sit by each other."

"He said not to sit BESIDE each other," Jay says. "We're not. I'm sitting beside YOU Jordan. And Lexi just happens to be sitting on the other side of you."

"Look at you finding a loophole!" I say with fake enthusiasm. "Let me guess, you're also in this class because you didn't apply yourself last year?"

"I had more important things to do last year, or shall I say more important PEOPLE to do."

Oh fun, straight boy humor. Because that's exactly what I asked for to make my day better today.

"You're hilarious Jay," I say sarcastically. "Alex is ever so lucky to have you."

"Oh, I know she is," Jay says.

I think he may have actually said that in a serious tone.

"I'm the luckiest girl in this school," Alex says with a smile on her face.

Wait… is SHE being serious? I'm moving my head back and forth between the two and they are making lovey dovey eyes at each other. Oh.. they are being serious. Dear God, what have I gotten myself in to?

Wait, wait, what is happening? What are they doing? Why are they leaning over my desk? Oh no. Dear God no! They're kissing, they are legit kissing right over my desk, right over ME. I think I may have just vomited a bit. Don't worry I kept it in my mouth. I'd hate to be known as the girl who threw up in class.

RING!

They're still going at it. Oh ew! Was that tongue?! Did I just witness Jay put his disgusting tongue into Alex's mouth? When will this horrific madness end? Why isn't anyone stopping them? And why am I still sitting in the seat, unmoved? It's like I'm paralyzed. It's like watching a disgusting, long, wet, car crash. I can't move, mostly because they are blocking my way.

"Mr. Hogart, Miss Nuñez," Mr. Perino calls out their names."Maybe you two can disengage from each other's mouths."

Jay and Alex pull away from each other. They're both wearing disgusting smug smiles on their faces.

"Didn't I tell you two NOT to sit by each other?" he asks, annoyed.

"You said we can't sit BESIDE each other sir," Alex says. "Technically we're not."

"And technically you're both in this class because you failed it last year. Maybe instead of making out you two could actually pay attention and pass this year."

Oh fuck. I hear a few "oohs" in the class and some people even snicker. Alex's face drops and I can see red slowly creeping up Jay's face.

"Well maybe if we had a better teacher," Jay practically spits with venom.

The class quickly becomes quiet. Mr. Perino crosses his arms across his chest and scowls.

"Mr. Hogart, I'm sure Principal Raditch doesn't want to see you in his office on the first day of school," Mr. Perino says threateningly.

"I'm pretty sure Raditch is expecting to see me in his office today," Jay responds.

Though I've only known Jay for about five minutes, he's probably right. Something tells me Principal Raditch probably expects to see Jay in his office at least once a week. I bet Jay is one of those people that get sent to the office so often that they have a special chair or a special spot on the bench just for him.

"Go. Now," Mr. Perino orders.

Jay rolls his eyes and scoffs. He picks up his book bag and walks to the door. What does he even carry in his book bag? There's no way there's books in there.

"See ya tomorrow losers," he says as he leaves the room.

Mr. Perino practically slams the door behind Jay. He looks really angry right now. Either Jay really knows how to get under this guy's skin or he possibly has anger issues. Either way, he probably shouldn't be a teacher. But who am I to tell an adult on how to live their life?

"Welcome to Canadian History," Mr. Perino says, acting as if the past two minutes didn't happen. "This class is required to graduate which means half of you probably don't want to be here but guess what, you are. I expect you to pay attention and at least pretend that you're half interested in learning how your country came to be. There's no talking in my class, no eating, no drinking, no gum chewing, and definitely no cheating. If I catch you cheating I will report you to the principal and then you will deal with the consequences. Do your reading every night because I do love to give pop quizzes. Are there any questions?"

Yes, what happened to you to make you such an angry little man?

"If you do have any questions but do not want to ask me you can always ask Alex," Mr. Perino says. "This year is a repeat year for her."

Oh wow! Did he really just say that, out loud? I look over at Alex and notice her clench her jaw. I can tell that she's trying to keep herself from saying anything to this jackass teacher. It's one thing to call out a student for doing something stupid and disrespectful; it's another thing to call out a student for simply taking a class over. Alex didn't even say anything! I have to wonder if this is fallout from what just happened to Jay. This isn't ok. I raise my hand into the air.

Mr. Perino points at me. "Yes," he says. "Your name?"

"Jordan Johnson sir," I tell him. "And yes I have a question."

"What is it?"

"My question is, what happened to you to make you such an angry little man?"

Yeah, I just asked that question. Everyone's faces say they can't believe it and some of my classmates are even making the oohing sound. Alex looks at me with a surprised look on her face. I see the anger from the Jay interaction coming back to Mr. Perino's face.

"Would you like to join Mr. Hogart at Principal Raditch's office?" he asks threateningly.

I shake my head. "No I'd rather not," I tell him. "But sir, you asked if we had ANY questions and I just wanted to know why you're angry. I mean if I were you I'd be excited. It's a new school year which means you have new students that you can teach the wonderful subject of Canadian History to. I mean maybe to most students in this school history is boring but not to me. Oh no sir. As someone who just moved to Canada I've been looking forward to this class for months. I even did a little bit a research and found out that this country's government is a constitutional monarchy and your version of independence day is July 1st though it's not really an independence day it's more of a celebration for when the provinces joined together to become one. Really fascinating stuff if you ask me."

Cue the Johnson smile. Now cue the wheels turning in Mr. Perino's head. See what I did there? Yeah I insulted the man, but then I just showed great appreciation for a class I'm sure very few people give a shit about. See teachers, especially high school teachers, want to feel that their subjects are being appreciated. And men especially like having their egos stroke. So when you insult a teacher you come back by saying how much you appreciate their subject, how excited you are to learn, throw in some random facts you quickly learned the night before, talk way more than necessary, and then you smile.

"Well Miss Johnson," Mr. Perino clears his throat. "I'm glad you came to class prepared." He turns to the blackboard and starts writing

See it works every time. I look over at Alex who still seems semi surprised. I shrug my shoulders as if it's not a big deal. Honestly, I'm lucky it worked. Sometimes it doesn't, sometimes my mouth gets me in trouble.

Mr. Perino starts passing out the class syllabus. "Every Friday we will have a test on the two chapters that you read that week," he says.

The sound of teenage angst, and bitter groaning fills the classroom.

"This isn't grades seven or eight. You're in the years that matter now. It's time to start preparing for university. You have four nights to read two chapters, that's plenty of time to be prepared for the tests on Fridays. And let's not forget about that pop quizzes I love to give."

Mr. Perino walks to the front of the class and places the rest of the syllabi on his desk. He turns around crosses his arms, leans against his desk and looks at us. He has a smug teacher look on his face. He claps his hands.

"Now let's learn about the Vikings," he says.

Ugh, I have a feeling this class is going to drag on forever.

After Class:

Am I alive? Or did I die from boredom and this is hell? Is hell high school? That last question is real and debatable.

History class just ended and I don't think I've ever been more excited in my life to each lunch. As soon as Mr. Perino started lecturing my brain just switched off. Who actually teaches a real lesson on day one of the new school year? The devil, that's who!

My fellow classmates and I are happily exiting the classroom and I think I just heard my stomach yell "FEED ME!" I feel like my stomach is currently eating itself right now.

Ahh! Someone grabs my arm and yanks me to a side hallway. Of course I'm once again up against lockers with Alex looking back at me.

"Ya know," I say. "Ya really gotta stop doing this. People are starting to wonder."

"What people?" Alex asks, confused.

I shrug. "I don't know. The people."

Alex rolls her eyes and shakes her head. "Why did you do that?"

"Gonna need you to be a little more specific. I've done a lot of things."

Alex crosses her arms. "Back there with Perino. Why did you talk to him like that? We're not friends. I don't need you or anyone else standing up for me, I can do that myself."

"Who said I was standing up for you?" I ask. "It's one thing to call students out. It's another thing for a teacher to practically insult a student and their intelligence. I don't like tyrants. Figured I'd bring him down a few pegs."

Alex is just looking at me now, her face unreadable. I can't tell if she's thinking about how to respond or concentrating on masking her feelings.

"Ok, whatever," she says and walks away.

"You're welcome!" I yell after her.

You know what, I'm really starting to wonder about her. She's like that movie with that weird kid. You know, the movie where it turns out all along the little boy sees dead people. I'm not saying Alex sees dead people, I mean… she might? I'm saying that she's confusing and perplexing. Like you didn't really know what was happening the whole time you were watching that movie so you had to watch it twice. THE 6TH SENSE! That's the name of the movie! Ah-ha!

Grrr..

I look down at my tummy. Oh tummy, I know. Let's get you some food.

AU: So yes this chapter was MUCH shorter, I figured chapter 2 was long enough, no reason to make all chapters that long. See ya next week!