Here I am, organizing the 30+ files in my Beyond Mischief folder once again at 1 am. In the author's note of chapter 39, I was hinting at the fact that I had originally planned to let Loki figure everything out by himself before Akira mentioned to me that he might summon Frigga's spirit for support after learning of Thor's bargain. This is the original version. Enjoy.
I cannot believe you really came back here, the dark voice continued its nerve-wrecking prattling. Was there truly no other place in all the Nine Realms you could think of?
Loki's entire body itched to answer the foul fragment of his mind that had kept him such faithful company during the darkest days of his existence but he forced himself to remain silent. Not that it was easy. He had been doomed the second he had silently admitted to himself that he should have listened to it—that he had invited it back into his mind like a scorned woman opening the doors to her abusive lover again—but he knew too that his mind also held the key to lock it back out. He just had to be resilient.
Resilient? Ha. You wish!
You really thought you don't need me anymore, it continued cheerfully.
Loki surveyed the coast of Norway from where he was sitting on a rock near the cabin he had followed his brother to a few days earlier, pondering his next move. He was painfully aware that he only had a little more than twenty-one hours left before Hela would come to reclaim him—Cursed be that witch! Who is she to imagine she has any right to possess your soul?—and that he had only one chance to extricate himself from Thor's foolish bargain.
Oh, really? And what might that chance be?
Loki had never truly tried to ignore its poisonous words before—at least not for more than fifteen minutes, after which its demands usually became unbearable—but now he had been ignoring it for the better of an hour and despite everything, he felt rather confident that he could endure it until it finally lapsed into silence again.
A weak chuckle escaped his lips when he remembered that his very first impulse—very much like a survival instinct—when Hela had released him and he had looked straight into Thor's eyes, feeling his brother's hands on his shoulders, had been to wrest himself free and crawl back to the pain and the drainage because the pain was familiar. When Thor had made his speech about belonging, his words lulling Loki into some sense of security, he had thought himself safe for the moment while simultaneously trying to persuade himself that it would not last. That whatever this was, it would only be temporarily. That he would go back, one way or the other. Yet somehow, things had taken a turn for the better and he had found that returning to Hela was longer an option. That he would resist her with every fiber of his being should she appear to reclaim him. He could neither comprehend nor explain why but for the first time since he had learned about his dark lineage all those years ago, he had felt quite at ease in Thor's presence since they had rejoined forces and he was not ready to relinquish his hold on that sensation. Not if there was any other way.
He betrayed you, snarled the dark voice. He bargained away your life! He clearly does not care whether you live or die! Why would you—
See, this is where you are wrong, Loki finally answered but nonetheless feeling empowered when he did. This is where you have always been wrong. Thor is a nitwit, yes. The worst kind of nitwit, I agree, but he never once wished harm upon anyone. It is not in his nature. He would never want me to suffer. Thor does not want anyone to suffer. Not ever. The only reason he agreed to that bargain—and here Loki laughed genuinely—is because he truly thought I would make it right.
You are a fool if you truly believe—
Loki shot to his feet and ignored the voice once more as he gazed at the Space Stone he had used to teleport himself away from the Avengers compound with a newfound interest.
Which I will.
The dark voice snorted. And just how are you going to do that? What is this chance you were speaking of?
Oh, please, Loki snorted back. You are nothing but a product of my mind. If you truly know me so well, I am sure you will be able to figure it out for yourself.
The voice grumbled softly but then it finally fell silent.
Things will turn out just fine this time, Loki assured himself in his own voice. I know they will. Yet, first of all, there was still a decent meal he craved and he would be damned if he did not allow himself this small comfort at least before he set out to clean up another one of Thor's messes.