Chapter 3
Where we last left off...
Caboose is excited to see Church (Alpha) again and so, "I am so happy to see you! AND YOU ARE IN A NEW BODY! WE CAN BUILD FORTS TOGETHER, MAKE OUR OWN BASES, -"
Church then tries to fly away while screaming, "GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF HERE!" He is flying so fast, he ended up hitting someone in red Mark 6 armor that was walking down the hallway.
"Ow!" the red armored man says with a southern accent. He is knocked to the ground as he dropped his shotgun. He rubbed his helmet and says, "What in Sam's Hell was that?!" The man looks around until he noticed the round object on the floor. "Oh it's one of you guys." the man gets back up with the monitor looked at him.
"Sarge?!" Church says with such shock. "I really am in hell!"
"What the-?" Sarge is surprised to hear a familiar voice. "What the blazes are you doing in one of those monitor bodies? And why do you think you're in hell? Did something went wrong with your transfer?"
"THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT!?" Church immediately get up at eye level to Sarge.
Then Carolina comes in the picture. "What the fuck is going on?!" she says with anger. "How am I supposed to get any training done without all the rack-" Carolina stops as she notices the monitor.
"Carolina?!" Church is once again shocked to see another familiar face. "But...You're supposed to be dead!"
The a light blue hologram of a soldier holding a sniper rifle appears and goes, "You'd be surprise."
Church/Alpha notices the hologram. "The fuck! WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON!? HOW CAN THAT BE ME WHEN- OWWW!" An electrical shock short circuit Church/Alpha and falls to the ground with all the lights of his little body gone black.
"CHURCH!" Caboose comes down the messed hall running. "WAIT FOR ME!" Then he stops as he notices Sarge, Carolina, and Church/Epsilon. "Oh hey! Church! How did you get from your new body and back inside Carolina."
Then Tucker appears from nowhere and says, "I wouldn't mind getting inside her again. Bow-chika-" Carolina fired a shot from her pistol which Tucker ducked. Tucker then gets back up and goes, "Whoa! Okay! Never mind!"
The lights on the monitor body flicker back to life with a distorted groan. Then Church/Alpha gets back up. "Ow." he sounds like he has calmed down. "Okay. I need to know what the fuck is going on."
While Caboose, Carolina, Epsilon/Church, and Sarge try to explain everything while Tucker runs away from Carolina; they walked down a hall to reveal an opening in what appears to be a side of a mountain. There, they see that they're in a large valley with snow-covered peaks, wrecked starships, and a large lake in the distance. They see everyone at work at making the place as homey as possible. Although, there is more than just the characters of Red vs. Blue down there. Back to their conversation, they talk a lot about what happened from the events after Church's death to season 15. Including some of the weird bits that took place between season 13 and season 15. (Season 14 doesn't count story wise!)
"So let me get this straight." Alpha then tries to make sense out of the whole ordeal. Then looks at the hologram of Epsilon. "You mean to tell me that this little guy here has taken my place?"
"Welllll..." Carolina tries to explain, "I couldn't say that."
Then Sarge says, "The little rascal helped us out in a lot of situations."
Caboose is still a little confused. "I'm sorry but I thought computers are supposed to be super smart, able to know everything we just did, and many other...confusing parts that everyone knows and is really easy to figure out."
Everyone looked at Caboose for a moment then gets back on topic.
"Anyway," Alpha continues while looking back at the others, "I would like to know how long you guys have been here."
Caboose then says, "Two weeks since we got here and have these strange devices on our arms that lets us build and craft things easier."
"Wow, Caboose." Alpha says with some amazement. "There must have been something-"
"Wait for it." Epsilon interrupts.
"Which I believe that we were supposed to be part of some surprise party."
"Yup," Epsilons suspicions were confirmed, "there it is."
Then there was a loud explosion out the opening with three people running out screaming. We have one in orange (Grif), one in pink (Donut), and one in maroon (Simmons) and this is how it went.
Simmons: *screaming for his life while running* "RUUUUUNNN!"
Donut: *running while screaming in a girly voice* "I'M TOO YOUNG!"
Grif: *running while screaming* "I DON'T WANNA DIE!"
Smoke is seen where they came from along with a bunch of crates being thrown at them.
"The hell is going on?" Alpha asked as they witness what is happening.
Everyone in the area cleared out but someone in aqua armor comes up to them.
"The fuck is going on?" he asked as the three stopped.
Grif goes, "She's back, dude!" He then drops his weapon and place his hands on his crotch. "I don't want to get hit in the balls again!"
"The bitch is back!" Donut shouts. "And she's more pissed off than usual!"
Tucker looks at them all and starts to puzzle things together. "Wait a minute. You don't mean-" BAM!
They all look at the direction where the loud bam noise was coming from. They see someone in black armor who is cracking her knuckles and neck. "Okay then." she says as she looks at the four. "Who's first?"
Tucker dropped his battle rifle and says, "Oh shit. Not her again." he groaned on that last part.
Tex is back and is meaner than ever. She then charges right at the four as they try to escape, but she punches all four of them in a row. Then she grabs Tucker by the legs, swings him around, and tosses him into a wall. Grif tries to play dead, but Tex grab his left leg as she swings him onto Simmons who tried to get away. Then rapidly bashes Grif into Donut along with Simmons like a game of whack a mole.
Up on a cliff, the Red Team known as FH57 with a few aliens are watching the four members of the Reds & Blues having their asses kicked.
Santos then says as he watches, "Isn't that the Reds & Blues, or Blue in this case, getting kicked."
"Yeah." replied Colonel Turf.
Then Santos goes, "As long as they don't fuck with my wine bar, this is entertaining."
Then Morgan injects, "Does anyone ever wonder how we got here? Last thing I remember was Cherry blowing us up after she misheard what we said."
"Yeah." Sue agrees. "I have been wondering about that. But let's watch the fight. Ten bucks on the black one."
Tex then throws Grif onto the ground as she is about ready to punch him in the nuts.
"NO! NOT AGAIN!" Grif screamed. SMACK! "OW!"
Tex then sees Simmons and charges at him with him saying, "No no no nonononono!" Then gets punched in the face. "OH SHIT!" and went flying right into a boulder.
"HEY BITCH!" says Donut at a distance. He readies a rocket launcher then goes, "Take this you dirty whore! Eat my giant-" He accidentally fires a round before finishing his innuendo. "Fuck."
Tex manages to grab the rocket and throws it right back at Donut.
"OH SHIT!" Donut screamed as he jumps aside and behind him is a little shack with red graffiti that says 'Santos Wines'. Yeah, that blew up with all the wine inside.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Santos screamed at the top of his lungs. His precious wine bar got destroyed. "That's it!" Santos is extremely angry as he turns to Peake. "Peake, get your alien cult together! We are on a bitch hunt!"
"Don't you mean witch?" Sue said jokingly
"Witch, bitch, all the same to me!"
Peake round up the aliens that worship him and head down there.
Tex is beating Donut's ass as she slams him into the ground. Tucker then tries to use his sword going "SWISH!" but she dodges. Then Tucker tries to go for a "SWOOSH!" but Tex dodge that as well. "STAB!" Tucker tries to thrust his sword (don't think of it as a dirty thing). But Tex grabs Tucker's arm and knees him in the crotch, "OOOOOWWW!" Then she took Tucker's arm and toss him to Simmons who was trying to use a railgun. But it mis-fired and hits some of the debris. Tucker is now unconscious.
Tex then picks up a pistol right before Donut throws a plasma grenade that sticks to it.
"Three points!" Donut shouts. "How's that you big black bitch?!"
"That's racist!" Simmons yelled.
Tex then throws the pistol with the grenade still on it at Donut. Donut does a girly scream and runs before the pistol exploded.
"HOLD! IT! RIGHT! THERE!" says the voice behind Tex.
She turned around and see Santos, Peake, and the aliens ready to fire on her.
Santos then screams out, "YOU DESTROYED MY WINE BAR! PREPARE TO DIE!"
Then a teal alien showed up and goes, "BLAAARRGGHH!"
Translation: "FAAATHEER!"
It is Junior who joins the battle. "Honk honk blargh blargh honk, wart honk blargh!"
Translation: "You hurt my father, prepare to die!"
Junior then takes Tucker's sword and ready to attack. But the others started shooting at her. Tex dodges every single plasma fire shot and gets closer to the point where she just bulldoze everyone in her path in slow motion. She then proceeds to grab Peake's throat with the aliens scream out, "PEAKE!" Then she tosses him right at four or five aliens that get knocked down. Junior then charges right at Tex with the sword, but ends up tripping on one of the other aliens and gets smacked in the face by Tex's fist. She continues to beat down the aliens left and right for a good three minutes until Church/Alpha finally comes down.
"TEX!" Alpha shouts.
Tex looks up at the sky and sees Church slowly approaching her.
He got down to eye level and says, "Tex, its me! Its Church!"
After a brief moment of silence, Tex grabs Church and starts beating Junior with it.
Church keeps on saying, "Ow! Ow! Ow!" along with Junior everytime she beats Junior with it.
Then Church/Alpha goes, "That's it! I'm coming inside, Tex!"
Tucker, still unconscious, says "Bow-chika-bow-ow."
So Church/Alpha got inside Tex's head which causes her to let go of the two and drops down.
Everyone is still in pain as they try to get up.
"ANYONE NEED A MEDIC?!" That was Doc shouting.
Carolina and Epsilon Church approach the unconscious Tex.
"Think he'll be alright?" Carolina asked.
"Well he IS the Alpha." Epsilon stated. "But I think I should go inside to help."
"You do that."
Epsilon went inside Tex in order to assist Alpha.
Grif tries to get up yet waddles with both his hands on his crotch. Simmons then gets up with aches all over this body.
"Hey, Simmons?" Grif starts a conversation with Simmons.
"Yeah, Grif."
"Why can't we ever get a break from Church or Tex?"
"I've been wondering that myself."
"Do you think anyone, assuming there are any, may have similar problems?"
"I don't know Grif. I just don't know."
"RRRUUUUUUUNNNN!" That is Sun screaming.
We turn back in time to focus on Team SSSN that are in some wasteland area with lots of dead grass, weeds, and a few trees. The reason why they're running is because a giant, bipedal reptile with large horns and gigantic claws started killing the Equuses they used to ride. The monster slice and dice them up into meaty pieces and gobble them up.
Team SSSN are still running for their lives with Sage going, "WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT?!"
Then Scarlet went, "I DON'T KNOW! JUST KEEP RUNNING!"
And Neptune screams like a little girl.
/: Processing...
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New entities have arrived at Sector 56-21 aka Crash Site Bravo.
/: Warning: Operation CLEAN-UP is incomplete.
Comply
/: 0.5% of remaining projects still remain. Recommend completing operation.
Processing...
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Operation CLEAN-UP canceled. Continuing Project ARES and Project PHOENIX on schedule.
On who's orders?
/: ADMIN
Very well. Continue monitoring.
/: Affirmative
AN: Hey guys! Hope you enjoy these first three chapters of my new story. If you guys have any questions, please leave them in the reviews. Also, I will add a little bit of realism to the series so the whole thing won't be like a video game. Love ya' guys!