"Holly?" said Dr Jensen as she opened her office door. "Hi!"
The child ran towards her. "Can I play the Barbies?"
"Holly, what do you say?" said Skyler, kneeling beside her child and putting her arm around her.
"Please!"
"Yes, and also, what did Dr Jensen say to you?"
Holly frowned.
"Just now, she called your name and then what did she say?"
"Hi?"
"Exactly; she said hi to you, so gotta say hi to her."
"Hi Dr Jensen, may I please play the Barbies?"
"Oh, what a polite little girl you are! Yes, you may," said Dr Jensen. Holly squealed with delight and ran to the toy box in the office.
"Was that ok?" asked Skyler, standing up.
"Of course! Hi Marie," said Dr Jensen, holding the door open for the two of them. "I'm not here to tell you how to be a parent, Skyler. You do just fine at that already."
Dr Jensen closed the door and the three of them sat down on two couches facing each other. "So how has it been going?" she asked.
"Well we started on the plan of getting Holly to spend more time at my house," said Marie. "And it did not go well. She woke up screaming for the first time in months."
"Oh. How were things otherwise on that day?"
"Fine, she seemed to find it quite exciting. Skyler dropped her off before she went to work and we made pizzas and watched Yogi Bear and she seemed to be having a great time. I got her to bed a little later than I should have done because she was excited, but we read a couple of stories and she went off to sleep ok, and everything was fine until she woke up screaming at 2 in the morning."
"What was she screaming?"
"'Mama, mama.' Not Mommy, mama. Which is sort of more...babyish, isn't it?"
"No, she's still calls me that sometimes," said Skyler. "I don't discourage it."
"Does she?"
"That's absolutely fine," said Dr Jensen. "That's a very common thing for a child her age to say, and it's also a common thing for a lot of children to suffer from nightmares. Did she tell you what it was about?"
"No. I asked and she just kind of burrowed into my chest and cried. She didn't say anything at all when she woke up."
"She never does," said Skyler.
"It is a perfectly normal thing for a child to have nightmares. We don't know what this one was about; that does not mean it was about her trauma. It could have been about a monster under the bed. It is very common for children to have nightmares, and when they're in an environment they're not used to it is particularly likely - and we did discuss that last time, didn't we?"
"Yeah but you seemed to think that because she had stayed with me and Hank before and because she's frequently put to bed by Flynn when Skyler's at work that the unfamiliar place and person thing should be less of an issue."
"But she was fine when she went to bed."
"Yeah."
"Was she ok in the morning?"
"Yeah, morning was fine, we made pancakes."
"And how was she when you were making the pancakes, was she engaging with you normally?"
"Yeah, I think so. She was ok."
"Then I wouldn't worry about it. It is very common for children to have nightmares. If she had been distressed and missing her mother to an unreasonable level when she was awake, then we would need to look at that, but she wasn't. She might have just had a dream about a monster. And any child who has a nightmare will wake up screaming for their mother. That is perfectly normal. What we are trying to do in getting her to spend more time with you, Marie, is to get her to understand that when those distressing things happen like nightmares or falling over and cutting her knee, which are all normal things that make children cry, what we want to do is to get her used to having you rather than her mother comfort her when those things happen. So rather than saying that your first night together did not go well, I would say it went very well, because a normal distressing thing happened and you were able to comfort her, and you said she burrowed into your chest; that shows that she trusted you to protect her from whatever imaginary monster was there. Holly?" The doctor stood and moved towards the child, who was intently engaged in brushing the hair of a Barbie doll that was wearing a pink ball dress. She looked up, and Dr Jensen squatted down next to her. "Did you spend the night with Aunt Marie the other day?"
"Yeah."
"How was it?"
"Good, we did cooking together."
"Yeah? Do you like cooking?"
"Yeah."
"Did anything else happen?"
"We watched Ogi Bear and played with the pretty rocks."
"Pretty rocks?"
"Yeah, I showed her my husband's mineral collection," said Marie.
"Minerals!"
"They're sparky rocks," said Holly.
Marie laughed.
"Did you have a nice time?"
"Yeah."
Dr Jensen stood up and moved back towards the sofa. "I think the two of you are going to be just fine together."
Skyler dragged her hand across her eyes.
...
Kim stepped off the plane in a state of trepidation. She hadn't been here in so long. Everything in the airport was instantly recognisable to her, and she couldn't tell whether that was a good thing or a bad thing. Then she saw a sign that said "Albuquerque Sunport", and she laughed. Maybe it was a good thing.
She took a cab to her accommodation, which was at a higher end motel. Kim had reasoned that this was cheaper and more spacious than a lower end hotel. She could have afforded a higher end hotel, but since she was planning on staying for long and frequent periods, it didn't make fiscal sense to spend any more than she had to - not for a pro bono case, anyway.
After a quick lunch at the Mexican restaurant next door, she took a cab downtown. She knew the street it let her off on very well, but despite this she almost couldn't find the office she was looking for. It was announced by a tiny sign at third floor level, which was only visible from across the street. The building had a run-down appearance and was home to a variety of different businesses, including a Chinese restaurant, a dingy-looking laundromat, a loan shark, and a massage parlour she really hoped was offering massages and not something else. Finally on the third floor she found it, a wooden door with a single sign that said, "Jonathan Brown Esquire, Attorney At Law". The corners of her mouth turned up into more of a smirk than a smile. Kid was trying as hard as he could, she thought. Trying to make a career and a reputation with very limited resources. She remembered that well.
She knocked.
...
Marie opened her front door, and broke into a wide grin. "Hi!" she said, kissing her sister on the cheek and leaning down to give Holly a hug. "No Flynn?" she asked.
"No, he's at a friend's house."
"He is quite the young socialite now, isn't he?" Marie closed the door and the three of them made their way to the kitchen.
"Yeah. It's good, he was really missing out before," said Skyler. "So I wasn't gonna insist that he come here tonight."
"We'll have fun, just the three of us, won't we, Holly?"
"Sparky rocks?"
"Oh, straight to the point. Only one thing on your mind."
"Holly, what do you say?" said Skyler.
"Please can I play with the sparky rocks?"
"Well you have to always play with those with a grown-up, ok, because they're very hard and heavy and you could hurt yourself if you play with them on your own. I'm busy making dinner right now, so if you wanna show your mommy where they are, she can get them out for you."
"Ok ok ok!" yelled Holly and tore off along the corridor, her mother falling behind.
Marie checked on a roast chicken in the oven and then put some peas in a pot to boil. Her niece's voice was audible throughout the house as she excitedly told her mother about the different personalities of the minerals and the names she had given them. "See the really tall one, Mommy?" she was saying as the two of them reappeared in the dining area. Holly almost knocked the box out of Skyler's hands as she pulled it down and pointed at a pillar-shaped mineral in the middle of the pile. "He's called Tom. He's blue and really strong and tall. And this one's Ruby, she's wearing a pink tutu dress, isn't she pretty?"
Holly made another grab for the box and Skyler said, "Hang on, hang on, let's sit down. We don't wanna drop them." Skyler placed the box on the kitchen table and Holly climbed onto her lap, still talking ten to the dozen about the mineral characters.
"You want a drink, Sky?" asked Marie.
"Please."
"Aunt Marie, what's this one called?" asked Holly, holding up a particularly ugly rock with an effluent brown base colour and chunky yellow crystals sticking out of it at regular intervals that looked like pustules.
"Umm," said Marie, handing Skyler a glass of wine. "I'm not sure, I don't remember."
"I know, Bruce!" Holly yelled. "He's Bruce, Mommy, and -"
"Shhhh, inside voice, Holly."
Holly's volume dropped, but she didn't take a breath. "He's Bruce and he doesn't have a very good time because he's really ugly and nobody likes him. But I like him."
Marie snorted with laughter.
Holly placed Bruce on the table and went back to the box.
"I'm trying to figure out whether Hank would love this or be really not ok with it," said Marie, chuckling as she walked back over to the stove. "Like, every time she calls them rocks, I can hear his voice in my head going, 'They're not rocks, they're minerals!'" Marie laughed.
Skyler sipped her wine and rubbed Holly's back expressionlessly.
...
Skyler butted out her cigarette on the outside wall of the building and dropped the butt into her portable ashtray. Returning it to her pocket, she blew the last of the smoke over her shoulder as she opened the door and went inside. She climbed the stairs to the third floor and opened the door of her lawyer's small office. He was sitting behind his desk, and opposite him sat a well-dressed blonde woman. "Skyler!" he said, standing up and gesturing towards the office's only other chair. "This is the woman I told you about."
"Hi, Skyler," said the woman, standing up and extending her hand. "Kim Wexler. I've been following your case and I'd really like to help you out."
"Thank you," said Skyler hesitantly. "But I'm, you know, I -"
"Pro bono, free of charge. I have a personal interest in your case, and I'm sorry to show up at such a late stage - I've been umming and ahhing for some time over whether it was worth flying halfway across the country for, but eventually I decided that it was. I have my own firm now up in Chicago, I do both criminal and contract law, but I used to be a public defender here in Albuquerque. And I know how little time and resources they have, and your case is particularly complex, it needs a lot of work. I'm not suggesting that Jonathan is doing a bad job or anything, just that he could do with some help. If you'll have me, that is."
"Um. What's the catch?"
"No catch. It's common for lawyers to do pro bono work. It enables us to fulfil our own personal interests."
"What's your interest?"
Kim took a breath. "Let's just say I know what it's like to be lead into trouble by a man. To be lead so far from what you thought you believed in that you can't even recognise yourself anymore. And when it happens, you can either drown in your own regrets, or you can step forward and do your best to recover yourself and defend yourself. You don't seem to be doing that. Everything I've seen of you in the media, you seem to be resigned to whatever punishment they may throw at you. You seem like you've given up."
"They've got me up against a wall."
Kim nodded. "I know. Not saying it's gonna be easy. But you have so much on your side, you just have to know how to use it."
"Really?"
"Yep. I know just how to do it. If you'll have me."
Skyler raised her eyebrows, opened her mouth and then closed it again. She looked at Jonathan.
"She's legit," he said. "She's got a very good reputation in Chicago. And I don't wanna do myself out of a job here, but I am struggling with your case - I don't have enough time to give it what it deserves. I don't have the experience and knowledge Kim has either."
"I'm proposing to spend two days a week on your case between now and when the trial starts," said Kim matter-of-factly. "That should give me enough time to get my head around it, research relevant past cases, speak to all the possible witnesses, coach the ones we decide to call. And when I say two days, I work pretty long days. I'd fly in and out from Chicago as necessary and don't worry, my business would cover the flight costs. Most of it'll be free miles, actually. And then when the trial starts - actually probably from a little before then, depending on how the preparation work is going - I'll devote myself to it full-time, and ah… full-time for me is about 65 hours a week."
Skyler's mouth fell open, and so did Jonathan's. "I have 30 other clients on my books," he said. "Even during your trial, I will be required to work on others. There's not enough of us public defenders, we're… spread pretty thin. I'm not trying to get rid of you, I'm – I'm just saying. This is a good offer."
...
"Again again again!"
"Holly, that's all you ever say! C-can't you say other things like 's-stop' or 'I wanna rest now' or 'l-let's go back to Aunt Marie's house and have ice cream'?"
Holly frowned, the cogs in her little head visibly churning. "Again and ice cream?"
Flynn laughed. "Ok. Just one more time." He began to trudge back up the grassy hill. Holly ran ahead, got to the top, threw herself down and rolled all the way to the bottom squealing. Then she jumped up and ran back to the top again. "Come on come on!" she said to her brother, who was still only halfway up.
"I said o-one more time!" he said.
"One more time for you!" Holly go to the top and rolled back down again, then jumped up and ran back up again, getting to the top just as Flynn finally made it there.
"Alright," he said, throwing his crutches back down to the bottom. "Th-this is the last time, ok?"
Holly nodded seriously.
Flynn climbed onto the ground and the two of them launched off, laughing all the way down. Holly squealed as she jumped up again, then her facial expression suddenly changed as she bent forward and vomited.
"Oh no," said Flynn. "That's why you should have only done…one more time instead of th-three more times."
Holly groaned, stood up again and then fell over from the dizziness. She began to cry.
Flynn put his arm around her. "You'll be ok. Come on. Aunt Marie will be home soon."
...
Skyler took a deep breath, signed the contract and handed in to Jonathan.
"I'll have this copied and file it with the court," he said.
Kim looked at Skyler, thinking that her expression was exactly the same as she'd seen in all the news stories. She looked like a deer in the headlights. Kim leaned forward and placed a hand on Skyler's. "Relax. You have so much on your side. I'll help you find it."
Skyler breathed in awkwardly, her lips twitching and her jaw clenching with unshed tears.
Kim leaned back and positioned her pen over her notebook. "But I wanna start with the things that are not on your side. We need to identify what they all are, read the legal precedents on all of them for so long that our eyes bleed, and plan exactly how we're gonna argue back. So the first thing I have to ask is, is there anything at all that you have not yet said?"
"What do you mean?"
"Well there are a few ways I could phrase that; I could say is there anything you haven't yet admitted to, but that implies guilt, and I'm not only referring to things you might be guilty of, I'm referring to anything at all that might make you look bad. Perhaps an easier way of phrasing the question would be, is there anything the DEA did not question you about? Anything you're afraid they may yet find out? Or anything that you have wondered whether you should reveal but decided not to? I'm not suggesting that you should reveal anything more, particularly not at this late stage, but just because the DEA haven't asked you about something doesn't mean they don't know about it. Doesn't mean some witness isn't gonna come out of the woodwork and start saying things in the courtroom about which you've had no warning. What I'm proposing is that you tell those things to me and Jonathan, remembering that we have absolute and unassailable attorney client privilege: that we will not reveal anything that's not in your interest to be revealed, and even then not without your permission. We may not need to discuss those things in the courtroom because they may not come up, but if they do and we are not prepared, it could go very badly. So just have a think about it, and it doesn't have to be today by any means; just have a think yourself about what those things might be, make a list in your head - don't write it down - and it doesn't have to be today, but we can discuss them and research and plan what we'll do if they come out."
"You're not wearing a wire, are you?"
Kim laughed.
"No," said Jonathan. "I checked her out very thoroughly."
"Fair enough question," said Kim. "Ok, let me reveal my cards before you reveal yours. The first thing I should admit to is that I was disqualified from practicing law for one year seven years ago. Because I was found guilty of malpractice, because of something I did which actually turned out in my client's favour, but I went rather the wrong way about it. I accept responsibility for my actions, but the fact remains that I would not have done what I did, or even had the idea of it, had I not been encouraged by somebody else. That person was my ex-partner – and I mean partner in both the business and the romantic sense. That's what I mean when I say I know how it feels to be led astray by a man. The second thing I should reveal to you, which I'm hoping might make you trust me a little bit, is that you know him. I knew him as Jimmy McGill, but you know him as Saul Goodman."
Skyler raised her eyebrows.
"Otherwise known as the sketchiest lawyer who ever took the bar. He almost pulled me down with him but I broke free. As will you, if I have anything to do with it."
Skyler nodded, trying not to think about cigarettes. "That's quite ironic," she said.
"Yeah?"
"There have been many times when I have wished I had access to Saul's dirty tricks. I hate myself for it, but there you go. I don't think much else will save me, to be honest."
"No that's not true, you have a lot on your side."
"Like what?"
"Your obvious remorse. How far you've fallen. The fact that you're a hard-working family woman. Your kids. Your sister. Has she forgiven you?"
Skyler paused. "Forgiven is a strong word, but she's very nice to me. Not sure why."
"Is she the sort of person who would be kind to her enemies?"
"No, absolutely not. She can be a bitch if she's mad at you, so I guess she must not be mad at me because she's been consistently nice to me for a while now."
"That's the impression I got. I'd like to meet her first to be sure, but from what I've seen so far I think she'll make a very good witness."
"She's already been called for the Prosecution."
"I know. Sorry, we can't call her as a defence witness, but we can have a cross-examination that's favourable to you fall right in the middle of the Prosecution's arguments. Do you think she'd be willing to meet with me?"
"I'll ask her."
"Good. And as far as what I asked you before, as I said you don't have to answer now - you can go away and think about it - but Jonathan and I can only do our job effectively if you keep nothing back."
Skyler took a breath. "Yeah, there are quite a few things, actually. I've almost confessed one or two of them a few times. I think I deserve to be punished for them, but I can't because of my daughter. So I have to keep them quiet. But you're right, the Prosecution could find out another way and then I'd be screwed." She looked at Jonathan. "Do you have the witness list yet?"
"No, they're being cagey about it."
"They're required by law to give it to us," said Kim, "so we will get it, it's just that they're delaying. And we can't force their hand until we've finalised our witness list either."
"Well if there's anyone from the IRS on it, or Patrick Kuby, Bogdan Wolynetz or Ted Beneke, they could do me a lot of damage."
"Tell me about them."