A/N: I do forgive you, online brother, and if I sounded tense in my response yesterday, it's because of all the work shifts I've been having at the movie theater, and the stress from those shifts have been leaving me more tired then usual. Anyway, time to finish this chapter. Onward!
Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer: The Movie (1998 Rewrite)
Chapter 2: Exploring the Town/"What About His Nose?"
*Are the opening credits over now? Has the singer stopped singing that song that gives away the entire story yet? We all good? Good! Then in that case, we can continue on with the story. Anyway, here a few days later, we see a village called Santa's Village where a bunch of elves are digging away some piles of snow. Something that I feel is kinda pointless considering that they live somewhere where snow NEVER melts no matter what (aka: The North Pole) but...meh. If they feel like they must, then I won't judge them. I mean, no pony else (besides Twilight) kept judging Bon Bon for watering her flowers even though their town was being attacked by parasprites in that one episode of the abridged MLP YouTube series called "Friendship is Witchcraft". Okay, now the camera moves slowly away from the elves, passes a few houses, a red train with a yellow bell rushes past the camera pulling a train of Christmas presents (and before anyone who expects the craziness from me and Dede42 asks, no, it's not James the Red Engine) until eventually, the camera comes to a stop right in front of a sign with a picture of a reindeer on it that has...oh no. Not those four again.*
[The Sprites]
We're The Sprites of Nothern Lights,
We light up the North Pole night.
[Aurora]
I'm Aurora.
[Sparkle]
I'm Sparkle.
[Glitter]
I'm Glitter.
[Twinkle]
I'm Twinkle.
Aurora: Well done, girls. I think our singing voices are all warmed up now,
Sparkle: "Warmed up"? Are you kidding? Our singing voices sound NOTHING like our regular speaking voices! I'd say our singing in front of these cameras needs a bit more working on. We all sound like we're on helium.
Glitter: Especially you, Aurora. I thought you were normally supposed to have a voice that's deep like Cinderella's whenever you speak.
Aurora: Hey, if I choose to hit high notes in songs when I sing, then I hit high notes!
Sparkle: But you sound so weird out of all of us.
Aurora: Actually, you're singing voices are no different than mine.
Sparkle: Like I said, we ALL sound like a high pitched speaking chipmunk when we sing. And I don't like it at all.
Glitter: (sees Rudolph, Blitzen and Mitzi walk past the sign and into the village) Shhh! Rudolph's here! Let's watch him and see what happens.
Blitzen: (giving his son the grand tour) This is where we live, Rudy. Santa's Village.
*As the family walk through the village, Rudolph takes a look all over the place and sees two elves (who look more like circus clowns or jesters) juggling outside their houses, three elves decorating a nearby Christmas tree, and two other reindeers building a snowman in the only way they know how (since they don't have any hands) and...AGH! Really, cameras? Must we REALLY have a huge closeup of Rudolph's eyes?! That's just CREEPY! And I mean more creepier than the Winnie the Pooh doll winking at the camera at the very end of his first film!*
(Was anyone else creeped out by that at the end of The Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh? Tell me honestly.)
*Thankfully, that scary closeup of Rudolph's eyes doesn't last long as we now cut to somewhere not too far away from the village that has a lot of Christmas trees and big, tall mountains in the background.*
Mitzi: (sees Rudolph looking down at the snow and digging at it) We call this "snow".
Baby Rudolph: (looks back up at his mother) "S"..."Snow"?
Mitzi: Awww! How cute! He just said his first word! That's right, dear. "Snow".
Baby Rudolph: (begins jumping for joy and around his parents in excitement) Snow! Snow! Snow! Hee, hee, hee, hee! (Accidentally kicks some snow into Blitzen's face)
Blitzen: (groans as he shakes the snow off his head) Mitzi, he's at it again!
Mitzi: (confused) Uh, at what, Blitzen? I don't see what the problem is.
Blitzen: You know exactly what the problem is. I mean there's something odd about our son.
Mitzi: Whatever are you talking about? He loves the snow. Just look at him.
Blitzen: I'm referring to his nose, Mitzi!
Mitzi: Oh? And what's wrong with our new son's nose?
Blitzen: Oh, nothing really. Nothing at all apart from the fact that noses are NOT supposed to glow!
Mitzi: Oh yeah? Says who?
Blitzen: Says me! That's who!
Mitzi: And who made you in charge of how noses work?
Blitzen: Well...(ends up at a loss for words)...um...uh...no-one did actually.
Mitzi: So why are you acting like it's a crime for Rudolph's nose to work differently than everyone else's?
Blitzen: (sighs) Look, Mitzi, I-I'm sorry if this is making it look like I have a problem with it. I'm just, you know, worried about what might happen if others see his nose glowing like that. I mean, you know what bullies can be like if they come across someone whose different than THEY are. (Suddenly sees Comet, Cupid and Dasher walking their way) Oh no. Not those three. Not NOW of all times! Uh, gotta hide the kid! Gotta hide the kid! But where can I...uh, Rudolph? Could you please come back here for a quick minute?
*Rudolph, who has no idea what's going on or why his father is calling him back, does as he's told and happily jumps all the way back to Blitzen just in time for him to hide the confused reindeer under his legs as his friends, Comet, Cupid and Dasher, finally arrive.*
Comet: Hey, buddy boy.
("Buddy boy"? Tigger, is that you?)
Blitzen: (begins to sweat nervously) Uh...hello, fellas. How's it going?
Cupid: Oh, it's going pretty good for the three of us so far today. But what about you? Did that weird stork come by delivering the baby buck yet?
Dasher: (hopefully) Is there a chance maybe we could all get to know him?
Blitzen: (begins sweating even MORE nervously) Oh, about that...uh...well, gee, fellas, I...I really WOULD like you to meet him...but...um...unfortunately, Mitzi and I are in the middle of...uh...grocery shopping? (Nervous laugh)
Mitzi: Oh, do knock it off, Blitzen. Let him out from under your legs.
Blitzen: B-but, Mitzi, what if...
Mitzi: Right now!
Blitzen: (just gives in reluctantly and sighs) Very well then. (Lifts his back leg up to let his son free) Come on out, Rudolph. (Rudolph, now no longer under his father's legs, begins jumping excitedly again)
Mitzi: Now then, Rudolph, dear. Meet your three new uncles. Comet, Cupid and Dasher.
Comet: Hi there.
Cupid: Yo.
Dasher: Whattup, man?
Baby Rudolph: Snow!
Cupid: Awww! Is that his first word? That's just adorable! (Walks a little closer to Rudoloh and starts tickling him) Coochie, coochie, coo! (Rudolph, being ticklish everywhere, starts laughing like crazy and falls on his back) Hey, isn't he quite the spunky one? (Starts tickling his belly next) Ha, ha. A chip off the old buck. (Suddenly, Rudolph's nose begins glowing again) GREAT BOUNCING ICEBURGS! Did you see that?
Comet and Dasher: See what?
Cupid: His nose! I-i-i-it just GLOWED!
Comet: (takes a closer look himself) Bless my soul! You're right!
Dasher: Whoa! That is one STRANGE nose!
Cupid: Hey, guys! Get a load of this! (Some of the elves from the village start coming over to see what the commotion is)
Blitzen: Uh, it's...quite alright, people! There's...uh...no need for any alarm of any kind! It's just...uh...an allergy! Yeah, that's it. It's definitely 100% an allergy! Nothing to see here! Go about your business and leave us alone! (Whispers to Mitzi) Let's take him home quickly and pretend this never happened. (Begins walking away from the crowd)
*Mitzi helps get Rudolph to stand up again (because he was still lying down on the ground after being tickled by Cupid) and then, they both start following Blitzen.*
Blitzen: Ooh, why, I'll lock antlers with the next buck who decides to just randomly show up and make a crack about my son's nose.
Mitzi: (just glares at Blitzen) Said the reindeer who clearly said that "noses weren't supposed to glow".
Blitzen: Hey, cut that out, Mitzi! I told you I didn't mean that and you know it!
Mitzi: (chuckles) I know you didn't mean it, dear. I just like to tease you now and again. But you want to know something?
Blitzen: What's that?
Mitzi: (looks at their son who is jumping around them saying "snow" again) I think even though our son has a nose that glows, he's just fine the way he is. After all, he's beautiful. Not odd. Why, in our eyes, I'd say he's just perfect.
Blitzen: You wanna know something too, Mitzi? I think your right! I couldn't agree with you about my little Rudy more!
*Uh oh. Background music coming in out of nowhere whilst Rudolph continues to prance around his parents. You know what that means, right? SONG TIME!*
[Blitzen]
Look at my little guy.
Isn't he a cutie?
This bouncing baby buck of mine.
And his name is Rudy.
He's quite a strapping reindeer.
And it's very plain, dear,
He has your grace and style...
[Mitzi]
But he has his daddy's smile.
*Suddenly, Rudolph is seen bouncing a beach ball on his head and then balancing it on his head whilst Blitzen continues singing. And he's actually pretty good with that beach ball until he all of a sudden trips.*
[Blitzen]
Can't wait 'til he's old enough to play in reindeer games.
Then one day, he'll pull the sleigh with Santa at the reins.
[Comet, Cupid and Dasher]
Oh? But! What about, what about,
What about his gleaming nose?
[Mitzi]
It has a healthy shine.
[Cupid]
And it absolutely glows!
[Comet, Cupid and Dasher]
What about, what about,
What about his gleaming nose?
(Now, forgive me if this subject is unrelated to this film whatsoever, but did you know that in some scenes of Mickey, Donald and Goofy: The Three Musketeers, there is sometimes a happy little tune playing in the background that sounds slightly similar to this song's chorus? Because whenever I watch that Mickey Mouse film and that little tune plays, I can never unhear "What about, what about, what about his gleaming nose?" getting mixed up in there.)
*Now, we cut to...what looks like either a greenhouse with Christmas trees and decorations in it or...possibly a shopping mall or...I don't know. Just take a brief look at this location for yourself because I don't know what this place the family is at right now. Anyway, whilst Mitzi sings this next verse, Rudolph is seen sniffing sunflowers and jumping to get a candy cane out of one of the trees.*
[Mitzi]
Look at my little guy,
With his angelic grin.
So cuddly and snuggly,
He's sharper than a pin.
He's such a special reindeer.
Here's a candy cane, dear.
Don't you want to pinch his cheek?
He's exquisitely unique.
*After that little trip to the...greenhouse...Christmas shopping...place, we then cut to the family who are now riding on that red train from earlier on. And no, it STILL isn't one of the Thomas the Tank Engine characters before you all get terribly excited.*
[Blitzen]
Our deer is so endearing.
But one thing that I'm fearing.
When we start to school him,
The kids may ridicule him.
*The train comes to a stop outside a station and they all get off and walk onto the platform and back into the village.*
[Mitzi]
Perhaps they'll ignore it.
Maybe learn to adore it.
He has that certain spark.
[A Random Girl Elf That Pokes Out Of A Window]
I bet that nose glows in the dark.
*Just as Blitzen and Mitzi think Rudolph's safe from anyone who might make fun of his nose, they suddenly find themselves surrounded by various elves and reindeers who all join in with the song and, you guessed it, make fun of Rudolph's nose as the family feared.*
[The Crowd Of Elves and Reindeers]
Put a cover on it.
Wear a lampshade upon it.
Forgive us for finding,
Rudy's nose is simply blinding.
Oh! Then! What about, what about
What about his gleaming nose?
[Mitzi]
It is a little pink.
[Blitzen]
He'll grow out of it, I think.
[The Crowd Of Elves and Reindeers]
What about, what about,
What about when Rudolph grows?
Will it grow any dimmer?
Or will it start to shimmer?
What about, what about,
What about his gleaming, ever beaming neon shining nose?
*Everyone starts circling poor Rudolph as they continue singing. This frightens him so much that he runs back to Blitzen to hide from everyone in hopes the teasing will end. Sadly, it doesn't.*
[Cupid]
Yes, what about...
[The Crowd Of Elves and Reindeers]
Yes, what about...
[That Same Elve Who Poked Her Head Out The Window]
Yes, what about...
[The Crowd Of Elves and Reindeers]
Yes, what about...
Yes, what about Rudolph's shiny nose?
*Alright, folks. There's good news and bad news. The good news is that the song is finally over as it was starting to get a little too annoyingly catchy for me. The bad news is that the crowd is now bursting into uncontrollable laughter. Poor Rudolph. Spoiler alert, there's most likely gonna be no end to this heartless teasing. At least...until the end, of course. But anyway, the amount of laughter and jokes about his son's nose starts getting Blitzen pretty mad.*
Blitzen: Alright, that does it! Dishonor! Dishonor on every single one of you! Make a note of this, Mitzi.
Mitzi: (confused) But...I thought we already made it clear that reindeers can't...
Blitzen: (ignoring Mitzi) Dishonor on you! Dishonor on Santa Claus! Dishonor on my poor son! Dishonor on...um...the two of us! Dishonor on...uh...I don't know...a cow...maybe...
Mitzi: Blitzen, let's just go before things get worse for all of us. I don't think Rudolph wants to be around all these people anymore.
Blitzen: B-but where can we possibly go that won't attract the wrong crowd?
Mitzi: How about Santa's Workshop? I bet Rudolph would like to see how all the toys for every good little girl and boy around the world are made. Wouldn't you, Rudolph? (Rudolph starts to nod his head happily and squeak as if to say "yes" again) Good. Glad we've got that settled. (Begins walking away from the village and the crowd) Come on, Blitzen. I believe it's this way.
Blitzen: (starts following Mitzi and Rudolph) Hey! Wait for me!
*The crowd just continues laughing until Rudolph and his parents are out of sight.*
A/N: This chapter is done! I'm loving it! Bye for now! R&R everyone!