Disclaimer: Do not own FSOG Trilogy!

APOV

If I had a view like this, I think as I stare out the floor-to-ceiling window in Christian's living room, I would never leave. Adding the Space Needle to my "someday" list, I sip my hot tea. The warmth from it eases some tension from my shoulders. I wanted to stargaze for a bit as Christian sleeps, but it's overcast tonight. All I can view is the bright lights of the city's attractions. The view is still incredible.

Holding the green mug firmly in two hands, I carefully sink to my knees, then on my butt. Crossing my legs, I take another small drink. Christian's penthouse is dark and quiet. It's nice and comforting. Given that its Saturday night, where I live people are always making a fuss when I'm trying to sleep. Christian said that he had another apartment for his staff—Taylor, Mrs. Jones, and Sawyer. They must be asleep because I've not heard a peep since I got out of bed to make myself tea.

A raindrop splatters on the glass in front of me. I follow it as it glides down the glass until disappearing. More drops follow, and soon fog begins to form. Watching the Space Needle fade into the mist, I set my mug down and draw my legs up close to my chest. My chin on my knees and my arms around my calves, I recall how Christian and I spent the rest of the evening after his confession.

At the concession stand at the movie theater, Christian told me he'd never had a date. It explained why he bought half a dozen overpriced candies, a large popcorn, two large soft drinks, and a large slurpy for us to share. Seeing his child-like eagerness, I did my best to finish my half of everything. However, my determination did not matter, because Christian was like a vacuum with the popcorn and slurpy. He even ate four of the candies and still had room for dinner. After the movie, we got Chinese. I don't know where he put it all away. Christian enjoyed himself so much he's declared the last Saturday of every month as our movie date night. I secretly swooned at his planning for the future, our future, together.

At our date's conclusion, Christian kissed me so tenderly my knees gave out. I'd never been kissed like that. We've kissed before, but he's never put so much emotion into it. Our past kisses were passion-filled, not unlike every other guy I've kissed before Christian. In that elevator, however, with his hands in my hair and me on my tip toes, it was as if he was putting the feelings he couldn't say to me into his kiss. I felt cherished and loved, unlike every other guy I've kissed before him. The shock of it jarred me, and my legs failed.

I think I'm falling for Christian, and it terrifies me to think he might feel the same.

He is so strong and brave and amazing and extraordinary and ambitious. He made a name for himself, put his mark on the world. He rose above the trauma of his early life. Even rising higher after that witch used his vulnerability to manipulate him. He's so sure of himself he was willing to share his life story with me just because he thought it was something I should know. How can I stand next to a man like that?

After everything he's been through, he deserves someone who can take him higher. All I'll ever do is bring him down. I don't want him tied to someone dirty like me.

Someone whose mother made the conscious decision to abandon her daughter in favor for her fiancé. Someone who didn't appreciate the hard days at work her father put in to be able to put a roof over her head. Someone who daydreamt of a happily ever after with a man twenty years older from the first day she met him, a man who was like a brother to her father. Someone who spent her days figuring out how to get this man alone, so she can confess her fantasies that only a thirteen-year-old could dream of. Someone who wasn't selfish and didn't bare her soul to try to sway him to wait for her till she was old enough.

I definitely don't want Christian tied to someone who—at the age of fifteen—gave her virginity to a man twenty years older just because he gave her attention.

I'm poison to Christian. He's worth thousands of me.

A tear falls and runs a warm path down my cheek. I sniff and wipe my cheek. Why is Christian wasting his time with me? What does he see in me that has him keeping me around? Maybe it's just my pretty face and open legs, as Case says.

"Sunshine?" I startle and wipe away all stray tears. Christian calls out again from his room. "Baby, where are you?" Given his sleepy muffled voice, I think he's just realized I'm not in bed with him.

Not making a peep, I rise quickly and wince when a little bit of tea sloshes out. I shake out my wet fingers and head towards the bedroom.

"Ana?" Now, I hear a slight panic in his voice. "Anastasia!"

Christian rushes out of his room. Upon spotting me, his shoulders sag in relief. It's dark in the hall, but I can make out Christian's silhouette coming closer to me. He makes to wrap his arms around me, and I hold my mug away in one hand to prevent it spilling further.

In his arms, I breathe him in. He holds me tightly, resting his cheek on the crown of my head. Sighing into my hair, he says, "I thought you left."

"I'd never leave without letting you know." I rub his back soothingly.

He releases me. "You did," he accuses. "The first time you spent the night, remember?"

"Yes, and I already told you why. My friends needed me." I sidestep him and enter the bedroom. "I didn't mean to traumatize you," I tease. His room is faintly illuminated by the floor-to-ceiling windows at the corner. I sip my tea.

Christian grumbles under his breath and closes the bedroom door. "Where were you?"

"I couldn't sleep. I made myself a tea." I set said tea on the nightstand. "I hope that's okay."

"Oh." I eye Christian as he watches me sit on the bed. "Um, of course, it's okay. Do whatever you want here, Ana. You don't need my permission." I smile my thanks.

After settling himself on the bed next to me, he admits quietly, "I thought you'd left because of what I told you earlier."

I lie on my side facing him. He is on his back staring at the ceiling. Moving closer until my head is on his pillow, I say, "I'm won't lie to you, Christian. That does play a role in why I couldn't sleep."

Eyes still above, he inhales deeply. Exhaling, he asks, "Why?"

"It was just very unsettling to hear, Christian."

"Why?"

I choose my words carefully. "It was heart-wrenching to hear someone I've grown to care deeply about was severely abused as a child and teenager."

"Should I have not told you?"

I think for a minute, then say, "This is something you wanted me to know. You felt it was important for me to know. I'm glad you trust me. I'm just having trouble swallowing it. But that isn't your burden."

"Sounds like it is my burden to have, Ana, if it's keeping you from sleep."

Hesitantly, I place my hand on his cheek and shift his face towards me. "I care about you very much, Christian. You've already been through enough. Let me handle this, okay?"

I can't quite see his eyes, but after a tense moment of us facing each other, he nods and kisses my palm. "You know, if you had anything you needed to tell me, I could take it."

"Thank you. I'll keep that in mind," I say, leaning forward and pressing my lips to his.

Not missing a beat, Christian rolls on top of me. His hands make quick work on the buttons of my top, and he rises enough for me to slip it off. His lips now on my neck, I feel him hook his thumbs in my shorts and underwear. As his lips trail down my chest to my boobs, he slides my bottoms down to my knees, and I kick them off. He cups my boobs in both of his hands and traces a nipple with his tongue. I moan and arch my back.

On the nightstand on my side, my phone chirps and the screen lights up. I pause, and Christian lifts his head. If it was an emergency, whoever it was would have called, not texted. I decide to ignore it till morning, or after. Smiling, I grip Christian's head and pull him up so I can kiss him.

As he reaches down our body and touches me, my stupid phone chirps again. And again. After the hundredth darn chirp it seems, I groan, exasperated. Not moving away or halting his fingers movements, Christian reaches with his free hand and grabs my phone. He starts sucking on my neck after handing it to me.

Biting back a moan, I open my phone and see all messages come from Kate.

Kate: A! Me & bro having party 4 Halloween!

Kate: On Halloween R rents place! They R going out of town!

Kate: 8!

Kate: Wearing costumes!

Kate: Bring your BF! Want 2 meet him!

Kate: Invite his bro & sis!

Kate: Short notice BUT having costume contest!

Kate: R U sleeping?

Kate: Ana?

Kate: Im texting til U answer!

Kate: ANA!

Kate: WAKE UP!

Kate: Is BF there?

Kate: Aaaaaaannnnnnnnnaaaaaaa!

Kate: ANAANAANAANAANAANAANAANA!

"Oh, my God, she's drunk," I say. Christian moves down my body and kisses my stomach. "Hey, do you have anything planned for next Saturday?"

His lips still on my skin, he replies cheekily, "Yes, I'm spending it with you. Did I forget to mention that?"

"Great! We can do couple costumes!" I text Kate back.

Ana: Wasn't sleeping. With Christian. Yes, to party. Stop texting me!

"Costumes? For what? Ana?" Christian pinches my butt.

"Ow! My best friend invited us and your siblings to a Halloween party at her parents' house." I place my phone under a pillow. "And we are going!" I practically sing. Parties are usually too exhausting for me, but I'd love to show off my hot boyfriend.

Christian hovers over me. "Like the idea of costumes but a costume party? I'm a little too old for that."

"Even for Halloween? And why not party? What else are costumes good for when you can't go trick-or-treating?"

He thrusts his pelvis against me multiple times. "Think hard."

"Oh, God," I moan. Is he into role play?

"Yes?" Hearing the smirk in his voice, I spank his ass playfully. His surprised gasp makes me laugh.

"So, should we start brainstorming couples' themes?" I ask innocently. Between my legs, I sense Christian lowering his PJ bottoms. I lick my lips in anticipation and spread my thighs wider.

"Hold that thought," Christian grunts, slamming into me.

A/N: So sorry it's been a while since I last updated. Thanks for all who've taken the time to review, fave, follow, and PM:)

Also, any ideas for costumes (couples or not) for Christian and Ana? Let me know via review or PM:)