It took me a long, long time to get to sleep that night. My stomach hurt, and I wished that I could get up and go get some
ginger ale. But, I didn't, because Darry had told me to go to bed. And, because I'd made such a dramatic exit from the living room. It would
look lame and weak to go skulking back out there again. I thought about peeking out my door to see if Darry was still sitting there,
on the couch, reading. But, even if he wasn't there, he might be in the kitchen. Or, he might come out of his bedroom just as
I was out in the open.
It made me feel really bad inside, scrapping with Darry like I had. Like I said before, it's not a common thing. Usually, Darry and I
get along real fine. Pony Boy likes to say that I'm Darry's favorite. His 'golden girl', or whatever. He says I try to stay on Darry's good
side. I don't feel like that's true. At least the part about me being Darry's favorite. I know he loves us all. A lot. And he's good to all
of us. The one part of it that might be true, well, that is true, is that I do try to stay on Darry's good side. Or, at least I don't try to
get on his bad side. Like, I don't purposefully set out to annoy him. And, I almost never sass him. I laid there and kept feeling
worse and worse. At first I'd been really upset at Darry, real mad, even. When he said I couldn't try to get the job that I
wanted, well, it just set my temper on edge. I wondered if that meant I was becoming a real, genuine teenager. Was there
going to be nothing but angst and strife between me and Darry from now on? That was so depressing to consider.
I told myself I was being silly. But, that didn't make me feel any better.
Anyway, I'd been really mad when I'd raised up my voice at him, and when I stomped off to my room. And, for a little
while after. But, now, I wasn't so much mad anymore, as I was just down. I still didn't think Darry was right, necessarily, but
I wished that I hadn't scrapped with him.
I don't know what time it was, when I heard the front door opening, and then closing again, and voices. I recognized them,
even though they were talking low. Soda Pop was home. And it sounded as though he had somebody with him. Two Bit, probably.
I got out of bed, and went to my door, opening it a peek. There was no sign of Darry, but I could see Two Bit walking
towards the kitchen. And Soda was heading towards his and Pony Boy's room.
"Soda," I said, in a loud whisper, opening the door just the slightest little bit.
He turned back, and came walking over to my door. "What are ya doin' up, June-Bug?" he asked. "It's late."
"Who's out there?" I asked, pointing toward the living room.
"Two Bit," Soda said.
"Not Darry?" I asked.
"No. Not Darry. Why?"
"Will you get me some ginger ale from the fridge?" I asked.
"Why don't ya get it yourself?" he asked, looking puzzled.
"Because. I don't want to see Darry."
"I told ya, Darry's not out here."
"Please, Soda?"
He was still looking at me, all puzzled like, but he went to the kitchen. I left my door opened that crack, and went to sit on
my bed.
A couple minutes later, he came back, carrying a glass of Sprite, with two ice cubes in it. He pushed the door open
and came in, walking over to hand the glass to me.
"Thanks," I said, and took a couple of quick drinks.
Soda sat down beside me on the end of the bed.
"How come you're hidin' out from Darry?" he asked.
"Because we had an argument," I said, taking another drink.
"You and Darry?" Soda asked, and I could tell he was surprised.
"Yeah. And he told me to go to bed."
"So?"
"He was mad," I said glumly.
"Even so, if you've got a belly ache, he's not gonna holler at ya for gettin' up out of bed."
"I know," I sighed. "I just-don't know what to say to him."
"What were you two scrappin' about?"
"He said I can't get a job."
"And-?"
I looked up at Soda. "And, that's it. He won't let me get the job at the drugstore. Or any other store. He says I'm too
young."
"You are too young, June-Bug."
When Soda said that, I sat up really straight, and faced him, straight on. "What do you mean?" I demanded, forgetting to
talk in a low tone.
"I mean, I agree with Darry. On this, anyway. Wait until next summer, or the summer after that before you worry about
gettin' a job."
"I thought you understood," I accused him. "About me wanting to get the flash for the camera and all that-"
"I understand that. I'm just sayin' maybe there's another way for you to earn the money, besides workin' at one
of the stores downtown."
"To earn that much money? There is no other way," I said, again too loud.
Soda shushed me. "You wanna wake Darry up, when you're so worried about him?"
"No," I said, quiet again.
"I've gotta get some sleep," Soda said. "You'd better, too."
Soda was starting to say something about babysitting in the neighborhood to earn money and I got up
and walked around him real fast, going to set the glass on my nightstand, and then I got into bed, covered myself
up to my chin with blankets, and turned my back on him.
I knew when he stood up, because I couldn't feel his weight on the bed any longer.
And, I knew that he was standing right next to the bed.
"What's the matter with you?" he asked, in a loud whisper.
"I'm tired," I said.
"Junie-"
"I don't wanna talk to you about it," I said.
I knew he was still standing there, because I could hear him breathing. But, then he left, switching off the light, and closing my bedroom door
really quietly.
I flopped over on my back and looked towards the doorway in the dark. Part of me couldn't believe that he'd left like that, without saying
good night. Even though I'd told him I was tired, and that I didn't want to talk to him about it. And, then it hit me, how snotty I'd sounded when I'd said that
to Soda. I'd either made him mad at me, too, or hurt his feelings.
Outsiders
I finally fell asleep, but I woke up feeling still rotten. My stomach still hurt, but not like when you're going to puke or anything. More
like a knot had settled there, and wouldn't leave. I couldn't remember any time before when I'd been on the rough side of two
of my brothers at the same time. And it sucked, let me tell you. It sucked big time.
I went to the bathroom, and then back to my room. I could hear voices in the kitchen, and I could see Two Bit's feet sticking
out from underneath a blanket, where he was still sleeping on the sofa.
I pulled on some shorts, and a t shirt, and decided that I shouldn't avoid the guys any longer. I opened my door and
prepared to head out to the living room again. But, then, I lost my nerve, and stood there. Finally, I worked my way
to the kitchen. Two Bit had managed to find his way from the couch to the table, and Soda was pouring orange juice.
Pony must have still been sleeping in, but Darry was at the stove, scrambling eggs.
Darry spoke first, turning to say, "Morning," to me.
"Mornin', June-Bug," Two Bit greeted me.
"Good mornin'," Soda said.
So they were both still speaking to me.
"Good morning," I said.
Darry came to the table and scooped eggs from the skillet onto Soda's plate, and then Two Bit's. He came around to my side
of the table, and put some on the plate at my spot, too.
Soda sat down, and pushed the pitcher of orange juice over to me.
"Thanks," I mumbled. I looked at Soda, and he gave me a half-smile. I felt better that maybe he wasn't one hundred percent
ticked off at me. And I had every intention to apologize to him.
I figured Soda would forgive pretty easy. Darry was another story. He was a lot more intimidating to approach.
They all started talking about other stuff, and I ate my eggs and toast in silence. I kept trying to sneak covert glances to my right
at Darry.
They were all finished eating and getting up, and I still hadn't said anything at all.
Darry was saying he'd be home early that night. By five. He paused, with his hand on his lunch box.
"When Pony gets up, remind him I said to get the grass cut, alright?" Darry said to me.
"Yeah. Okay," I said.
"Get the laundry folded and put away, alright?" he said then.
I nodded, trying to meet his eyes. We exchanged a look, and I wished that Darry could tell that I had hardly slept because
of what had happened.
He didn't say anything more, though. He just took his lunch box, and left.
"Come on, Two Bit, let's get a move on," Soda said.
"Yeah, yeah," Two Bit said, reaching out to take the last piece of toast. Two Bit left the kitchen, heading to the living room,
giving me a hair rub on his way past. Which left me, sitting at the table, and Soda, at the counter, stacking plates.
"Make Pony help with the dishes," Soda was saying.
I should have said, 'Okay,' or 'I will'. An imp raised its ugly head, though, and what came out was this.
"I can do them. It's not like I have a job or anything," I said.
Soda turned to face me, his eyes wide.
"Are you kiddin' me, Junie?" he said. He shook his head, and turned his back to me again.
"Soda-" I began.
"I'm not gonna fight with ya," he announced. And, they he started walking to the living room.
I jumped up, and followed him, just as he got to the front door, with Two Bit already out on the porch.
"Soda," I said, again, pleading. He turned around at the front door to look at me.
"What?"
"I'm sorry."
He stood there a couple moments longer, and then he came back over to where I was standing, in the
kitchen doorway. He put his hands on my shoulders, but then he just stood there, not saying anything at first. Just
looking into my face.
"You're bein' a brat about this," he informed me.
"I don't mean to be. It's just important to me, Soda."
"Well, I'll tell ya this. If you wanna convince Darry of anything, arguin' with him is not the right way to go about it."
I perked up. "You mean, you've changed your mind, about me being too young?"
"No. I haven't changed my mind." He looked sad about it, but he still said it. "You know it's not safe for ya, walkin' by yourself. That's the
part that Darry's really worried about."
I deflated again. There was a honking from outside. Two Bit.
"I gotta go," Soda said.
"Okay." I sighed. "I'm sorry I was snotty to you last night."
"It's okay," he said. He kissed me on the top of my head, and said, "See ya later."
Outsiders