Clary woke up the next morning feels completely sated. It took a couple of minutes for her to look around and remember everything that had happened last night, and when it did, she couldn't help the small smile that curved her lips. She shut her eyes, turning her head on the pillow and rolling over, and then opened her eyes quickly as she realized that the pillows next to her and the blankets were disturbed. It wasn't like she kept to her side of the bed when sleeping by herself, she had a tendency to star fish, but they blankets were actually pulled back, as though someone had been in the bed next to her and had gotten out, and there was still an indent in the pillow.

Jace had slept in the bed with her last night.

After he had gone down on her.

The small smile shifted, to something a little goofy, as she relived just how good that orgasm last night had been. It had been fucking amazing, and she had no idea how the hell she was supposed to go back to settling for inexperienced guys at university after that. In the back of her mind, she knew that she should be a little bit worried about what last night might change between her and Jace, but they were both adults, and he seemed like the kind of guy who would just brush the whole thing off. He had never been the type to talk things through, usually he didn't talk all that much at all, she would be the one doing all the talking, she barely knew anything about him.

She had to admit, she was kind of disappointed that Jace hadn't kissed her last night. They had shotgunned when smoking up a hundred times before and their lips had brushed and multiple times she had considered kissing him. He had an incredible mouth, and his lips always looked so soft...She was pretty sure he wouldn't pull away, he would be more than happy to go along with it, but she had always stopped herself.

Maybe things had shifted a little after last night. She would be more than happy to start fooling around with Jace, he was fucking gorgeous, he was funny in a subtle, sarcastic way, he didn't push her for things, he made her feel relaxed and comfortable, and he was more than happy to share a seemingly endless supply of good food and great weed.

Clary swung her legs over the edge of the bed and was about to look for her pants when she heard voices outside the room. At first she thought that maybe Jace was just watching something on TV and had it turned up, but then she realized that it was Jace talking to someone. A female. Clary frowned as she got out of bed, picking up her phone which Jace must have put on the ground beside her side of the bed last night, and crept over to the doorway to try and listen in. It wasn't that she was nosy by nature, but there was something in Jace's voice that almost sounded angry.

Clary bit down on her lower lip as her eyes skimmed the room, finding her pants and also the jersey she had taken off pretty much as soon as she had gotten to his apartment. She dressed quietly, trying to be as silent as possible, wincing when there was a slight creak on the floorboards, but the voices continued. She walked back to the doorway, not wanting to put her head around the door to look at who was out there with Jace, but it seemed as though the girl was angry, because her voice was just getting louder.

"What the fuck are you doing, Jace?! She's in your bed right now?! You don't even know her!" Clary swallowed hard, quickly realizing that she was the 'she' and 'her' that was clearly upsetting Jace's companion. "She's just some—some kid!"

"She's only a couple of years younger than me," Jace's voice was quiet, but Clary could still hear him from the bedroom, and there was a sharp edge to his words. "And it's not like she's some stranger."

"What is she—twenty one? Twenty two?!" The woman snapped.

"And how old is that guy that you keep going on about?" Jace sounded defensive.

"That's different! I'm only twenty four, and I'm taking things slow with him. We're getting to know each other, we're not just jumping straight into bed with each other!" The woman shot back, and Clary wanted to step out of the bedroom, to say something about the fact that her and Jace had known each other for a while now—getting close to a year—and this was the first time anything that a more than friends event had happened. She had wanted it before, usually when she was high and he was a little looser than his usual quiet and uptight self, but it never had. "And it's not just about her age. You need to stop fooling around with this tramp who is just taking advantage of your hospitality and the way you feel about her!"

That hit Clary right in the stomach.

Anger was curling in her stomach, and given how much she wasn't a morning person, the fact that she felt completely awake and infuriated, with this woman calling her a tramp and saying that she was taking advantage of Jace spoke volumes for just how upset she was.

Her hands curled into fists, her fingernails digging into the palms of her hand. It was lucky that she had tucked her phone into the back pocket of her jeans, or she had a feeling that the plastic case of the iPhone would be cracking under the pressure right now.

"Look, you don't see me commenting on your relationships and shit, Iz! And I expect the same thing for you!" Jace snapped, and Clary swallowed hard, not sure how she felt about that statement. Sure, he was pretty much telling her to butt out of their business, but he also wasn't defending Clary, and also was—he calling what they had a relationship?

Did he really think of her that way?

"Jace! I'm just fucking looking out for you here! You hadn't been right since Maia, and then this chick comes waltzing in, just a few months later, and suddenly she's the one that you're making fancy dinners for and letting fall asleep on your couch—she's like a rebound girlfriend, except from everything you've told me about her, she doesn't feel the same as you. So you're just making a fool of yourself over this girl who is using you to escape boring life where she's totally broke and can only afford two minute noodles and toast because she's still a fucking student and spending what money she can on weed." Clary licked her lips and ground her teeth together, pinching the skin on the inside of her lip.

"This has got nothing to do with Maia!" Jace sounded enraged at that thought and Clary's eyebrows raised.

"Who the fuck is Maia?" She murmured under her breath, although in all honesty, that wasn't the most important question she had right now. One of the main things running through her mind was 'who was the fucking bitch with Jace?'.

"Clary is not Maia! She's a friend, and if there was anything else going on between us, then that's between me and her!"

"I'm not the only one who feels this way! You don't think Alec thinks the same thing?!"

"Well, if Alec feels the same, then he can come and talk to me about it. I'm pretty sure that he would find a better time to come and talk to me about than when I'm half asleep in the morning and Clary is literally sleeping in the next room!" Jace let out a heavy sounding high, and Clary chewed down hard on her lower lip. "What goes on between me and her is none of your business."

"You're my cousin—and one of my best friends. I'm just telling you this because I'm looking out for you," the woman dropped her voice to a softer tone, but Clary already hated her. This woman had called her a tramp, said that she was using Jace, said that she was taking advantage of him, pretty much said that the only reason that Jace was even interested in her was because Clary was a rebound for some girl named Maia—all before this woman had even talked or met Clary.

She took in a deep breath as she strode out of Jace's room, hoping that her face didn't give anything away as she squared her jaw.

The instant she came into view, Jace and the woman—Iz—fell silent. Jace's eyes flicked between Clary and the unfairly pretty woman next to him, and it looked as though he was trying to judge if Clary had heard anything. Clary tried to keep her stony, unreadable expression, but it slipped as she walked across the room, and she saw the guilty expression on Jace's face and he stepped forward.

"Clary—" he began, but she walked straight by him, toward the door. She heard Jace swear under his breath and he started to move toward her, but she didn't even bother stopping to slip into her shoes as she reached the door and threw it open. "Clary—wait!" There was no way in fucking hell that Clary was waiting, and she practically flew down the steps, nearly tripping over more than once, but just kept on running.

It was stupid, because Clary had heard people bad mouth her before. It wasn't as though she had many enemies or anything, but everyone got bullied at some stage in their life. And she was in University, she had fun experimenting with her sexuality, she knew that some people called her slutty because of that, but that was pretty easy to brush. Maybe because she knew that she acted a little slutty, but she was young, and she was having fun, and she wasn't hurting anyone.

This girl, though—she made it sound as though she was exploiting Jace, and only interested in him because he fed her and gave her weed.

The first time they had properly met was about eight months ago. Clary had seen him at the club a few times, but he never seemed particularly interested in talking to anyone, only making sure the bar was running smoothly before returning out the back. Then she had heard from someone in one of her classes that he also sold weed, and they had given her his number. She had text him, and he had told her to come over. It had been strange, because when she had shown up at the address he had given her, the way he looked at her was as though he recognized her.

Clary never asked if it was because he had seen her before at the club, she just sort of rolled with it.

Jace invited her in, said that she could 'test the merchandise'. Clary hadn't thought twice about it, and had gone in, and they had shared a bong, some of the best weed she had ever smoked. He had told her the first one was free. She had gone back a few weeks later, and he had been cooking dinner, and he had said she could join him. They had eaten dinner and watched American Horror Story, and then smoked.

It had sort of just kept on happening, until it was a pretty regular thing.

It didn't totally make sense, but she liked what they had.

"Clary?" Lydia was on the couch when she got home, and she looked as though she had just woken up, so she had probably crashed out on the couch last night. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine," Clary said shortly, charging through the apartment and straight to her room, slamming the door shut. It wasn't until she collapsed on her bed that she realized she was crying, and her feet were absolutely aching from practically running the whole way home without any shoes on.

It was only a few minutes later that her door opened, and a sleepy looking Lydia and Simon came in. They didn't say a word as they climbed onto her single bed, curling themselves around her comfortingly.

I've written this about four times now, and I'm just going to keep it simple.

On the 15th of March 2019, there was a terrorist attack in my beautiful country, New Zealand. This is the first ever mass shooting on this level during peace time in the beautiful islands that I have spent my whole life in.

This doesn't happen here. We don't have mass shootings. We don't have a fear of one another to the point where it drums up anger that turns to hate. In the words of our absolutely incredible Prime Minister, "They are us."

We are all one people, and we can't let hate win.

I hope you all spend time with people that you love and cherish, and I hope you never hold back to show this.

Arohanui and Kia Kaha x