Light in the Dark

"Literary Analysis?"

"That's right. Subject code is 444. It has to be on the list. Look, I've even got the receipt proving I paid the fees for it."

The clerk took the sheet of paper I was holding out, and examined it, at first reluctantly, then with growing interest.

"You weren't lying…"

"Hey."

"Sorry," he said, not sounding remotely handed the receipt back to me."We get at least a few students every term who think they can cheat the system and get an extra credit. You'll have to forgive me for not believing you at first."

"Yes, that's all great, but you believe me now, right? You've seen the receipt."

With great reluctance, the man grunted in the affirmative.

"Well, then, some answers would be nice, you know? We've had two classes already, but no teacher's showed up, there's no attendance, no coursework or assigned reading, and there's only two students. Am I the only one who thinks something's weird here?"

"Look, I don't know, all right? I'm just a guy who hits the enter key and stamps papers!"

I glared at him. This was, expectedly, turning out to be inconvenient.

I was currently in the campus office, face to face with a clerk. As you can tell, my current objective was to unearth some of the mysteries behind the enigmatic Literary Analysis class. And, as you can also tell, I wasn't making much headway in that direction.

"Look, there's a terminal right in front of you. There's got to be something about the class in there."

Once more, the middle aged man shot me a look that clearly said he didn't want to work. I deepened my glare, and he sighed.

"All right, all right, I'll look it up. Gimme a minute."

He tapped away at his keyboard for a while, followed by some clicking of the mouse. By the looks of it, he had indeed managed to find something, as his eyes had widened.

"All right, here we are. Literary Analysis, subject code- 444. Says here this class was introduced… just this year. And damn… you're right. There are only two students registered for it. You… and some girl named Yukinoshita Yukino."

"What about teachers?"

"It says here that's classified. I'm guessing they'll only show themselves during exams or something."

I clicked my tongue annoyance.

"What about books, though? A syllabus? There's gotta be something?"

"It says here you're gonna be graded based on your results in class… and that there's gonna be an end-of-term exam. There aren't any books listed though."

"That doesn't tell me anything! None of this makes any sense! How can the official records be this vague? It's almost as if the University's trying to hide something."

The atmosphere in the room shifted subtly as soon as I uttered those words.

Nothing even needed to be said. I could feel the change in the air as if the temperature had dropped.

"Some matters shouldn't be looked into. You should drop this investigation here, kid."

For some reason, I didn't argue back. My throat felt dry. Turning around, I walked out of the office as quickly as my legs could carry me.

Of course. Why am I even surprised? This whole setup reeked from the start.

My body was shaking.

There was something so horribly wrong with all of this.

This situation was contrived.

A class with only two people, and a nonexistent teacher who never showed up.

I was clearly a nobody.

But the girl wasn't.

Yukinoshita Yukino… whoever she was, she was important. And this class had been set up specifically so that someone could interact with her. And I had a feeling that my turning out to be that person was not random. Not when everything else in this situation had come to pass because of intelligent design.

No, someone had scouted me. And, for whatever reason, seen fit to choose me to be the one Yukinoshita would interact with.

But why? What was the reason behind it?

I didn't know.

But all of a sudden, the nature of Yukinoshita stuck out in my mind. She was not normal. And honestly, I don't even give a shit about normalcy. But Yukinoshita… something about her was very, very off from most human beings, and not in a harmless way. Although she was a victim, something about her set off every warning bell inside me.

Was she aware of it?

Aware that this whole situation was according to someone's plan?

This was so wrong.

Time was passing faster than it should.

Already, the in-between days were gone, and it was time for the next Literary Analysis Class.

Curiously, I had not seen Yukinoshita a single time in any of the days when we didn't have class together.

All of a sudden, I was already standing in front of the Literary Analysis classroom. I gulped nervously. When last I had seen Yukinoshita, we had spoken about the bullying she was facing on campus. And… I had told her she should live, and strive to be happy. That was the last thing I had said to her… and those words had sparked a transformation in her.

When I opened the door in front of me, what version of Yukinoshita would I see?

I took a deep breath, and pushed the door open.

Turning to the side, I saw her seated in her usual seat.

To my immense relief, she looked like her usual self. That is to say, graceful and poised, lacking the nervousness and timidity she showed in front of her bullies, or the unnerving confidence she showed after our last conversation.

"Good morning, Hikigaya kun," she said, choosing to initiate our interaction, to my surprise.

"Good morning," I called back. Seeing her demeanour the same as it was last time had allowed me to relax, and I was about to make my way over to my regular seat, when Yukinoshita spoke.

"That would not be optimal. Sit here instead."

She gestured to the seat next to her, which, I noticed belatedly, had been pulled up much closer to hers than it would normally be, to the point where it wasn't even in its row anymore.

I gulped slightly. If I were to refuse here, there was no telling what might happen. Well, at least with one exception. I was certain she'd feel slighted by the refusal. Yukinoshita had a hard enough life, and honestly, I would not mind sitting next to her at all, not after she had gone out of her way to offer.

So I made my way over, and took the seat. No sooner had I done so than I realized I was actually much, much closer to her than I had thought would be the case. Right now, we were close enough that I could smell her. The scent of something sweet, most likely either that of the soap or the shampoo she used. The thought of that caused my mind to immediately wander to certain images, certain dangerous images. Shaking my head, I forced myself to get my head out of the gutter (or the bathtub, in this case). But the reality was enough more powerful than my imagination.

For whatever reason, my leg happened to bump into Yukinoshita's. That had actually happened a few seconds ago, and those seconds had been spent visualizing her in a bathtub. Thus, by the time I realized our position, we had been like that for a while, and she didn't draw away.

I was wearing trousers, but on this occasion, Yukinoshita happened to be wearing a short skirt, while her legs were mostly covered by stockings. Which, of course, did nothing to hide how firm yet soft her thighs were, pressed against my own.

I had never truly appreciated before how incredibly arousing legs can be. The toned muscle of her thighs, thick yet shapely, was dragging my mind right towards exactly the things I was trying to avoid thinking of.

Far from shrinking from the contact, she actually drew closer. Bringing our desks together, she held out her phone in front so that we could both see the screen. In doing so, our shoulders were now touching, and her face was inches from my own.

From this close, I could actually feel the warmth her body was radiating, proving the title of "Ice Queen" to be entirely incorrect.

The powerful, intoxicating scent of her was even stronger now, and mixed with something organic that probably wasn't from any soap.

I gulped as I realized that was because it was the scent of Yukinoshita herself.

Damn it! What's with this love comedy-like situation? Don't just come that close to me: you're giving me all sorts of wrong impressions!

"Hikigaya kun, as I recall, you were the one to share something both of the previous times. I thought I should finally take my turn, and return the favour."

The image on her phone's browser showed a scene I was familiar with. It was, after all, from a manga I had read, and loved. What was surprising was having Yukinoshita show me this page from the very final chapter of this series.

"I didn't know you read manga," I said.

She shook her head.

"I didn't. Not until recently. After last time, I searched online for the story you'd told, and found out it was from a popular seinen manga. I managed to read through all of it, and discovered I liked the art and narrative form, so I looked for more. This is the series that caught my attention next."

"You finished a total of over 600 chapters in three days?"

Yukinoshita tilted her head to the side slightly, once again using that adorable gesture that made me want to pat her head.

"Is that unusual?" she asked.

I couldn't help but laugh slightly.

"Yes. But that's okay."

She nodded, and we both turned our attention back to the screen.

This particular manga was about a young boy you dies, but cannot move on to the afterlife because there simply enough space for him. Thus, he is given a second chance at life, along with the powers and responsibilities of a "Spirit Detective", his task being to deal with supernatural phenomena and entities that threaten the human world.

Well, that's how it begins, anyway. The series goes from strength to strength, and follows the Shounen convention of constantly stronger foes. To deal with them, of course, the main cast consistently keeps getting stronger too.

In a sense, this progression is very much in line with the typical conventions of the genre, and nothing new. The reason the series stands out is because of how well written each member of the main cast is. There are no cliched responses or dialogues, and each of them comes across as three dimensional and believable in their motivations, personality and actions, making them highly endearing.

What's also worth mentioning is that unlike most battle manga, the series does not end with the protagonist miraculously on top of the mountain. Instead, he loses his final battle, like anyone else might, and learns to grow up and move on with life.

The last scene depicts him returning to the girlfriend he had kept waiting for years. She'd remained faithful in that time, believing he'd be back, as he'd promised. Of course, there are limits to human patience, and in time, being alone takes its toll. Just when she says she isn't willing to wait any longer, he turns up and says she won't have to.

It's wonderfully cliched and cheesy, unlike the rest of the story, but for all that, it's still an incredible ending. And somehow, it always manages to put a smile on my face.

I looked at Yukinoshita.

"You wanted to analyse this?"

She shook her head.

"Not at all. I wanted to show that not all things need to be analysed. That sometimes, it's enough for a work of literature or art to make a person feel better. Give them some hope. You have…"

She hesitated slightly.

"You looked preoccupied and rather sad, Hikigaya kun. I thought I might share something that would make you feel better."

I started slightly, staring at her.

It would have been easy to dismiss what she'd done as just another prank.

Back in middle school, plenty of people had pretended to be kind to me just to get me to do things for them.

But Yukinoshita Yukino was not fake. She just wasn't the kind to derive satisfaction from something like that.

Of course, I was familiar with the alternative too.

People who were being genuinely kind.

A kindness that had nothing to do with me at all. It could have been anyone else, and they would have been kind to them too.

But Yukinoshita was awkward and isolated. I had never once seen her with another person.

Come to think of it, this was one hell of an awkward attempt at making someone feel better.

What if I hadn't been into this particular manga at all? What if I simply wasn't the type who felt better when I saw a romance work out? What if the fact that this ending was so cheesy put me off?

This really had been a shot in the dark.

But maybe that's why, it managed to put a smile on my face.

Yeah, this situation was contrived. I had been forced into it, into this game, by someone who wanted the two of us to interact. But I think Yukinoshita didn't have anything to do with that. Even if she knew the person who had done this, she was probably just as much a pawn in their game as I was. Come to think of it, that was probably why she was so defensive the first time I met her. She probably knows something is wrong here, and suspected I might be in league with whoever's responsible.

But… she doesn't think that anymore.

Yeah, whoever did this, is a person I don't trust.

But as I looked at Yukinoshita, and the tiny smile on her face, I realized it didn't matter. She wasn't the manipulative kind at all. Even if I was put here for some reason, it didn't need to be the reason I stayed.

I realized I liked that smile, and wanted to see it again. Somehow, being able to bring even the smallest bit of happiness into the life of this lonely, isolated girl… made me happy.

It wasn't kindness on my part.

I might not have done the same for anyone else. But, perhaps because it was her, I was able to do this.

The rest of the class passed by with us making conversation or discussing other things from the two manga she'd read. When the bell rang, I got up to leave, feeling slightly guilty.

Somehow, it felt like we were closer now.

And… it felt wrong to leave someone like that in her predicament.

Those girls were still bullying her, and I didn't want to be the guy who left after offering a temporary solution.

"Yukinoshita san… I realize I might be saying too much, but… I want to help. If someone is hurting you, I can help. Those girls… they shouldn't be treating you like that. If it's difficult to approach campus security alone, I can come with you. Or, if you'd rather face them yourself, I can be there when you do it."

Around midway through, I'd started to talk fast, the words slipping out of me before I could stop myself. I realized I was being frantic.

For a horrible moment, I thought I'd made the same mistake I'd made in middle school. Trying to do too much. I wondered if I'd disgusted her. Whether my offer would scare her off.

Yukinoshita looked at me with slightly wide eyes for a moment, then smiled.

"Hikigaya kun is quite kind."

The way she said it, with the hint of a teasing glint in her eyes, made me squirm in embarrassment.

To my surprise, she laughed gently, a surprisingly musical sound that I wished to hear more of. Then, she spoke gently.

"Don't worry. You're already helping me much more than you think. In fact, I doubt those girls will be bothering me again."

I raised my eyebrows slightly.

"Really? So you took care of it?"

"Something like that. Hikigaya kun. I look forward to seeing you again. Please take of yourself."

This time her words made me blush. I stammered out some kind of goodbye, then rushed away before I made a fool of myself.

It was only much later that I realized, something was off about one of the things she'd said.

"Really? So you took care of it?"

"Something like that."