(14) I Won't Let Go

A/N: First things first, thank you all for Keeping Faith (that's the name of a Jodi Picoult book. She's the author of My Sisters Keeper and my favorite author! If you haven't read one of her books go do it!) in this story! I got like SEVEN reviews on one chapter which is like ASDFGHJKL! AMAZEBALLS!

Also I got a review from BowtiesAndCoffee saying that the ending of the last chapter made them cry! I am so sorry! I would cheer you all up with some fluff, but the next few chapters are gonna get real angsty... And music will be involved soon!

The Fray (2 songs)
Florence and The Machine (1 song)
Rascal Flatts (2 songs)
Sara Evans (1 song)

Who do you think will sing? What will they sing? Will anybody even sing? What's up with all my rhetorical questions?

Any guesses?

Ps part of why this update took so long was because I lost my iPod for a few weeks... It was in my tennis bag the whole freaking time...

3

XXX

Kurt sat in the pew. In that dreadful place called a courthouse. Where Karofsky's trial was taking place.

He sat there and all he could do was stare at him in a trance, a million questions racing through his mind. How could he sit there, so calm, knowing what he did to him? Why would anyone want to defend a case like this?

His eyes watered as a final thought crossed his mind. Why?

His final thought was interrupted by Garners voice. "The prosecution calls Kurt Hummel to the stand."

Kurt swallowed and inhaled deeply. As he stood up, he felt Blaine grab his hand and turned to see him giving an encouraging smile. "Courage," he whispered.

Kurt nodded, walked up to the stand and took his oath.

"Mr. Hummel," began Garner. "Can you please recall what occurred on the day of November 22nd of last year?"

Kurt closed his eyes and inhaled deeply. "I was raped... By David Karofsky..." he said, not opening his eyes.

"Can you elaborate on the order of events in which they occurred?" she pried. Of course, they had gone over this routine numerous times.

Kurt finally opened his eyes. "I was making my way to Lunch, replying to a text from Blaine... When David came and smacked the phone out of my hand and threw me against the lockers.

"I followed him into the locker room to confront him and... Pretty soon, we were yelling in each other's faces. The last thing I said was 'You are nothing but a scared little boy who can't handle how extraordinarily ordinary you are' and he grabbed my face and... He-he kissed me..."

The room was completely silent with anticipation.

"He um... He tried to kiss me again, but I pushed him away..." Kurt's steady breathing became more rapid. "He..." he shut his eyes again, but the memories from that day kept playing over and over again like a terrible horror movie stuck on repeat. "He grabbed me by the collar and slammed me up against the lockers and said 'I told you not to push me'... I told him to think about what he was doing and he threw me against the showers where I hit my head and..."

"And then what?" she gently asked.

"He raped me..."

You could hear a pin drop in that courtroom.

Garner let the words and the silence sink in before taking a good look at the jury and saying "Nothing further..."

Monarch stood up as she was sitting down and walked right up to Kurt. "You claim that he threw you against the showers and that you remember him grabbing you by your collar, correct?"

Kurt nodded. "Yes."

"And you hit your head against the showers?"

"Yes..."

"You needed head surgery that day Mr. Hummel did you not?"

"Yes, but just to stitch up a cut."

"Is it possible that this little bump on the head could have disoriented you momentarily?"

Kurt hesitated before answering. "I- I suppose so but-"

"And is it possible that what you remember as David Karofsky pushing you up by the collar was actually him trying to save you from falling?"

Kurt furrowed his eyebrows. "That's not what happened."

"How can you be so sure about that Mr. Hummel, when that bump on the head nocked you out cold?"

Blaine stood up with his hands balled into fists. "That's not fair!"

Judge Robinson banged his gavel. "Mr. Anderson please control yourself! I would regret to be forced to remove you from the premises."

"... I-I..." Kurt sat there, feeling like an idiot with his mouth hanging open and nothing coming out.

"Mr. Hummel, please answer the question..." pushed Monarch.

"I can't... He finally answered."

"Mr. Hummel, is it possible that maybe in your confusion you misinterpreted things and because of your history with David, your subconscious decided to cry rape?"

"What!? No, that's outrageous!"

"So your saying that it's not possible that your memory could have been altered by that bump on your head?"

"No!" Kurt almost yelled.

"Are you implying that your memory is somehow superior to anyone else's, because I've seen memories be altered by far less injuries? And yours hasn't exactly been proved exceptional at this point. Especially considering your extenuating circumstances..."

Kurt was just waiting for the straw that would break the camel's back. That didn't even make sense! Or did it? The pressure was getting to him and he was ready to burst into tears any second now...

"Objection!" cried Garner standing up. "Badgering the witness!"

"Sustained, Monarch, watch your tone," warned Robinson.

"Let me rephrase that. Mr. Hummel, can memories be altered or inhibited by large blows to the head?"

"... Yes..." his voice was barely a whisper.

"I'm sorry, Mr. Hummel, i don't think the jury heard you, could you pease speak up?"

"I said yes!" Kurt finally yelled, his voice cracking with a mixture of anger, pressure, sadness, and frustration, tears finally running down his face.

"Nothing further, your honor."

XXX

Kurt sat at the Lima Bean after that horrible and humiliating cross examination, waiting for Blaine to meet him for their coffee date.

He was browsing through the baked goods menu when the seat next to him became occupied by an unfamiliar figure. Kurt looked up from his menu and came face to face with a smirking face that resembled that of a meerkat's.

"Please tell me you're single." said meerkat face. "But even if you're not..."

"I'm not," Kurt replied quickly. "I'm taken, and happily so."

Meerkat face shrugged. "Doesn't bother me if it doesn't bother you." he said as he snaked his arm around Kurt's shoulder.

Kurt shot him his best bitch glare and immediately flung his arm off of him. "Well it does bother me! And you know what else bothers me? Strangers putting their arm around me like its nobody's business, when they have no fucking right to touch me!" Kurt's chest rose and fell heavily and his eyes watered a little bit.

"Well, my name's Sebastian. There we're not strangers anymore." he smirked at him and Kurt scoffed. "Wait a second..." Sebastian's eyes narrowed. "You're that basket-case that says he was raped! Aren't you!?"

"Go fuck yourself."

"My, my, a bit feisty! It's ok. I like it like that..."

Kurt was just about ready to explode into tears. He'd had enough harassment in school and by that lawyer. He didn't need it here, too.

"I suggest you leave my boyfriend alone before I kick your sorry ass."

Sebastian turned around to face Blaine. He whistled, eyeing him up and down. "And you would be..?"

"The boyfriend of the boy you've been harassing." he hissed. "And I'm flat out telling you to leave... Now..."

He threw his hands up in sarcastic surrender. "Ok, ok! You guys win!" he got up and started walking towards the door. He swiftly turned around, lowered his head and whispered in Kurt's ear "Just know, I'll be there when you guys break up, because you will... Considering the fact that you can't give him what he /really/ wants..."

Blaine didn't hear what he'd said, but Kurt had heard it clear as day. And try as he might, he couldn't wipe it from his memory.

"You ok?" asked Blaine.

Kurt shook his head as he lifted his head to face his boyfriend's, meeting his gaze with broken eyes. "Can we please just go home?"

He pursed his lips and nodded. "Yeah, come on..."

XXX

As soon as they walked into Kurt's room, Kurt threw his arms around Blaine and began sobbing into his shoulder. "I'm so sorry, Blaine."

"What!?" cried Blaine, shocked by Kurt's outburst.

"Sebastian was right..." he cried. "I'm never going to be a good boyfriend because I can't... I don't know if..."

Blaine took Kurt by the shoulders and pushed him back a bit so he could look at him.

"What if we can't ever /be/ together like /that/ because of what happened..?"

Blaine shook his head and pulled him back into his embrace. "What makes you think that makes a difference?" he began. "I meant what I said that day on our first date. I don't care if I never get to do anything kore than just kiss you or hold your hand. That's not important to me. What's important to me is that you're happy. You're safe. And that no matter what, you feel loved... /you're/ what's important to me..." he finally finished, wiping the tears off of Kurt's face with his thumb.

Kurt smiled through the tears. He leaned forward and kissed Blaine, wrapping his arms around his neck. Blaine leaned in to deepen the kiss, and when they finally needed air, they broke away.

They smiled at each other. "I love you..." whispered Kurt.

"I love you, too."

"You will be happy, Kurt." Blaine smiled. "I'll make sure of that, even if it kills me. Because you deserve it."

Kurt smiled. "I would never be happy without you, so don't try too hard."

They laughed together and sat down on the bed. Eventually, they laid down and Kurt nuzzled his head in the space between Blaine's head and shoulder, peacefully drifting off to sleep.

Yeah, things were going to be fine.
Or so they thought...

XXX

A/N: this is what happens when I write at 2AM and try ending on a cliffie...

Yeah, I know it sucked but... I have a bit more planned and hopefully I won't lose my iPod again and I have time and all that jazz!

Review? Pwetty pwease? *puppy dog eyes*