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Chapter 9
"For you are a magnet and I am steel"– Walter Egan, "Magnet and Steel", released in May 1978, It reached number eight on the U.S. Billboard Hot 100
I'm still giddy with an Edward high the next day as Alice, Angela, and I lay on the sand applying Bain de Soleil oil all over our bodies until we're frying like tater tots.
Alice keeps rolling the dial on our little transistor between KROQ and KHJ because she can't decide what to listen to. "Alice, you're going to wear out the batteries. Just leave Shadoe Stevens on." I spread my fingers out on the towel beneath me so that I don't have any pale spots.
"Fine," she huffs, and rolls over onto her back. She's been moody all day, but I'm glad she came out to the beach, we haven't really seen much of her lately. We're lined up in a row, trying to look good while we sweat. "I'm hungry," Alice pipes up from her Ziggy towel. "Anyone want anything?"
Angela and I decline so Alice makes her way to the Tasty Dog alone. "What's with her today?" she asks me.
"I don't know, she's been restless all morning. Maybe her folks are fighting again."
Angela hums in agreement and we lull into silence, enjoying the sounds of seagulls, screaming kids, and Top 40 radio on this beautiful day.
My mind fills with Edward, as it normally does. Instead of just having fantasies, I have actual footage to play over and over in my head. I can't stop wondering about when we'll hang out again, if we actually do. He might've just said 'next time' because it seemed like the polite thing to do, or a thing you say when you don't really know what to say at all and want to leave. Surely Rosalie wouldn't be too keen on the idea of us hanging out, but I push that thought away. She doesn't get to have any say on who Edward hangs out with if she's going to continue to be shady.
Besides, it's not like he has any feelings towards me in return. Maybe we can be pals.
"Uh, what are you smiling at?" Angela is hovering over me when I open an eye to look at her.
Busted. "Nothing?"
"You're laying there smiling like a fool." She pulls her sunglasses down her nose to peer at me. "Did you get high without me?"
"No!" I laugh and push her away from me, my hand sliding off her oil-covered arm. "Don't get sand on me."
"Would this have anything to do with Jared?" She sing-songs and my smile drops instantly. She eyes me warily. "Guess not."
I sigh, climbing on an elbow and craning my neck to see if Alice is around. I tell Angela everything I've kept to myself the last few days. The strain between Rosalie and Edward, the anger I had towards both of them, the ice cream threesome and the sushi.
We sit in silence for a minute, looking at the waves and ducking from the errant frisbee that heads our way. "I think I'm going to put a halt on Jared. I just don't like him that way. He's nice, but…"
"He's not Edward," she finishes and I just nod, grateful that she isn't lecturing me about it– calling me an idiot and making me feel bad that I like someone that doesn't like me back.
Alice returns with enough food to feed an army so we help her eat some fries and nachos while we point out cute boys and gossip about the girls we know acting like fools in front of some volleyball players.
After a while, Angela and Alice lay down on their stomachs to tan their backs, but I search out the waves, knowing I'm looking for a familiar head of hair. The surfers are too far out for me to tell who is who, so I just scope out the beach and fight the urge to walk to Cullen's and casually shop for sunglasses I don't need just to see if he's working.
I'm surprised I don't see Rosalie hanging out with Lauren and Jessica, who are over on a blanket surrounded by guys and laughing like they've been hitting the gas at the dentist. Rosalie is the sun's number one worshipper, but I guess she could be hanging by the pool with Renee.
Or she could be with Edward, her boyfriend. I try to tamp down my irrationally jealous thoughts because it shouldn't be my concern if she's with him or not. He's not mine to worry about.
I lie back down and try to clear my head of all thoughts and meditate. I'm successful for a while until Alice groans. "I think I'm gonna hurl." She sits up and rubs her stomach, a sick look on her face.
I'm not surprised, the amount of food and combination she just ate for a girl her size was world-record worthy. "Do you want me to take you to Tasty Dog? Use the bathroom?" I ask, concerned.
"No, I think I'm just gonna go. It's probably too much sun." Angela and I nod as she gets up holding her stomach. We watch her as she gathers her stuff and trots off slowly across the sand.
"Is it just me or is Alice finding any excuse lately to not hang out with us?" Angela asks, a sad lilt to her voice.
I don't answer as I continue to watch her cross the beach, my heart clenching a little bit in agreement.
Ending things with Jared isn't as uncomfortable as I thought it was going to be. Like everything else with him, he's nice about it and just says he wishes things could be different. I'm glad we never got too involved, because the awkwardness if I ever see him will be less because he never felt me up.
He asked me if it was him, and I said the line no one believes, "It's me, not you" but this time that is true. It's all me. Well, and Edward, but only as far as he is a thing taking up room in my heart.
When he got up from eating the burger I gave him free out of guilt, he hugged me and said we'd remain friends, and I told him I'd still come to his short film debut and cheer him on whole-heartedly.
A few days after that, I'm at Tasty Dog with the cook's son again cause Alice is still sick. I tried to call her the night she left the beach early, but there was no answer at her house. I really hope everything is okay and plan to stop by as soon as I can, but part of me wonders if she's avoiding me for some reason. But Angela didn't have any luck either, so who knows.
Between having to clean up after jerky teenagers, waiting on screaming kids, and stepping in spilled ketchup, I'm about ready to go home sick myself. I have no idea why I thought working this summer would be a good idea. I barely have enough to buy a car, and even if I could afford one, there's no way I'm going to the used car lot anytime soon. I don't care if Rosalie could get me a deep discount.
The only thing that's kept me moving today has been the few glimpses of Edward I've caught with my stellar stalker eyes. He's working in the shop today, and Carlisle has him moving boards in and out of the shop to rotate on the sales racks. He's got no shirt on, and I think I'll send Carlisle a basket of onion rings as a thank you.
There's a lull towards the end of the day and the shadows from the awning have cooled down the window counter, so I lean out and take a break, letting the ocean breeze cool off my sweaty skin and bad attitude.
I close my eyes and try to breathe in the salty ocean air, but mostly just mustard and relish hit my nose and it makes me angry and frown like Oscar the Grouch.
I am so going to quit.
"You okay? You look like you're about to jump. Or be sick."
Internally, my eyes widen and my jaw drops. My heart does the Hustle and my feet move like John Travolta. I open one eye to see Edward is throwing that smirk at me, one elbow leaning on the counter while his hair ruffles in the breeze.
"Hey," I reply casually like I'm not about to become Freddie Mercury and sing "We Are the Champions" as loud as possible because he's actually standing at my counter talking to me and not slinking away without a look.
"You have a piece of straw wrapper in your hair." I'm completely mortified as I stand quickly and thrust my hands into my hair. "Here, let me." He reaches across the window, but I have to lean out so he can reach. I tilt my head down and see my boobs being squished invitingly under my bikini top and I hope he notices.
"Uh, thanks." I take the wrapper from him and hastily throw it to the floor behind me, hoping its disappearance erases this moment from his mind forever.
"Tough day?" He leans fully on the counter in front of me, his bare chest teasing me with how perfect it is when so close.
"You have no idea. Alice called out sick and Jimmy over there is basically useless." We look over to the kid and he's busy popping zits in the reflection from the napkin dispenser. "How was your day?" I ask, and I'm reeling from just how normal this conversation is going.
"Dad had me organizing the stockroom. It was brutal." He smiles despite his crap day and mine is suddenly one hundred percent brighter.
"You want a Coke or something?"
"I was gonna grab a bite, but I have a better idea." He leans in a bit more towards me, and whispers. "You wanna get out of here? I won't tell your dad." He gives me that lopsided grin.
Starsky & Hutch don't move as fast as me as I grab my bag and hoist myself up and over the counter. I throw my apron onto the top and tell the cook and Jimmy that I'm leaving for the day. Their protests fall on deaf ears as I turn to Edward.
"Calgon, take me away."
PB Fun Fact: My mother never let me or my sister have bubble baths/Calgon baths or whatever. She said it wasn't good for that stuff to get inside us. So no, to this day, I've still never had a bubble bath.
Thanks to the two girls I'd slather sunscreen on with and lay out all day, LayAtHomeMom and CarrieZM.