Trigger Warning: References to self harm.

Now that I knew where it was, I was able to find a less roundabout way of getting to the vacant lot, cutting down my travel time significantly. That area of town still gave me the chills, especially when it was so much later than when I walked through it the night before. As always, I was hyper vigilant approaching the tree house, looking up to see that the particle board door was still pulled over the opening.
"Meghan?" I whispered as loud as possible. There was no response. I called to her again before climbing up and letting myself in. I clicked on my flashlight and did a quick sweep of the small space to check for intruders – human or otherwise. Assured I was alone, I hauled myself up and got comfortable while I waited for my female companion.

I wasn't sure how much time had passed before I heard someone approach; long enough for me to start nodding off out of boredom.
"Ty?" Meghan's loud whisper carried up through the opening, waking me instantly. I shifted to lean over the hole.
"It's about time you showed up," I teased her as she climbed up to join me. I reached down to help her the rest of the way, noting her slight hesitation before taking my hand and allowing me to pull her up.
"Careful," she winced as her sore ribs rubbed against the edge.
"Sorry." I hadn't at all forgotten about her sore ribs. What worried me now was whether her discomfort was from old injuries or new.

I barely gave her the chance to settle in before I jumped into the reason for our impromptu meeting. Don't get me wrong, I wasn't at all inconvenienced being summoned so late. What I was was concerned.
"So, what's up?"
"Don't get your hopes up, this isn't a booty call." If she could see my face, she'd have known right away I didn't think it was. When it came to Meghan I knew better. I could barely get within a few inches of her before she put more distance between us.
"Oh how poorly you think of me," I played along for the time being, wary of where this night was about to go.
"I just wanted to be clear." The jesting tone of her voice disappeared and an uncomfortable stillness settled in the fort.

"Then what's this about?" I prompted, sensing her hesitation. "You missed school today."
"Yeah… I, uh… yeah." Meghan's voice was quiet. I could see the shape of her head bow as she looked down, probably toward her wringing hands.
"Did something happen?" If she couldn't tell me straight up what was wrong, I was more than willing to play Twenty Questions to figure it out. She did call me, after all; which must mean she wanted to talk.
"You followed me home this morning," she stated. It wasn't accusatory, simply stated as a fact, leaving me no room to argue the contrary.

My jaw clenched, popping nervously as I stared at her through the darkness. I wouldn't deny it. There was nothing to deny. "I just wanted to make sure you were-"
"Don't." She cut me off. My mouth snapped shut again. "Please, don't say it. I asked you not to come with me for a reason, Ty."
Instantly, I felt ashamed and stupid all over again. "I'm sorry."
There was a pause as I heard her swallow, her words struggling to come out. "It's too late for that. He caught you lurking outside the house."
I hung my head. There was nothing for me to say to defend myself. I knew anything I said would sound like I was trying to make lame excuses. I knew I was making a mistake and yet I did it anyway. I knew. I knew. I knew. Yet I disregarded what I knew. Just like everything else. Unlike everything else, this was the one time I actually cared about the consequences of my rash actions.
"I know," I admitted, ashamed. "We had a lovely chat."
I could feel Meghan's scowl. "Don't do that. This isn't a joke, Ty. He knows who you are."
I sighed, kicking myself. Sarcasm was my first line of defense in serious situations such as these. It was involuntary. "I realize that. But I was more concerned for you." I lifted my head.
"If you were so concerned you would have done as I said and met me at school." Her words were angry but I could hear the tremble in them.
"I don't know how many times I can say I'm sorry." Honestly, I wish that could be enough. I knew better.
"This is beyond apologies, Ty. You completely ruined my trust in you." Meghan's voice cracked and took my heart with it. I don't think I ever felt such a painful emotion before. It stunned me to silence as I tried to find a more acceptable combination of words.

Meghan was quiet for a while along with me. "We can't do this anymore," she whispered eventually. "He can't find us together. I thought…" she paused, looking away from me even though I couldn't take my eyes off hers. "I hoped we could have this. This was supposed to be our safe place to get away from all of this shit."
I longed to reach out to her. "It still can be. We made it tonight, didn't we?"
Her head shook. "You don't know, Ty. I almost didn't get the chance." She sniffed and I nearly had an anxiety attack. Dear God what did I do?
"What do you mean?" I hesitated to ask.
"I tried to explain. You were just a schoolmate. We had Chem together. It didn't matter. He didn't believe me. He locked me in my bedroom. I wasn't even allowed out to use the bathroom. That's why I missed school."
I felt sick, unable to hate myself more. I didn't seem to fully understand the severity of Meghan's situation. I knew it was bad but, hearing her story, I never realized how much worse it was than I thought.
My hands balled into such tight fists they started to sweat. "How did you get out?"
Meghan raised her hand to her face. I assumed to brush away tears. "My mom. She let me come to the table for dinner. I offered to get us drinks and crushed sleeping pills into theirs." She sounded disgusted with herself but I shared no such sentiment. It gave me the idea to do the same to Wade once in a while just to shut him the hell up.
"I waited for them to pass out then I called you and left. They should be out at least until morning, but I don't want to take that chance. I just needed to tell you in person that this can't continue. Whatever it is." There really was no definition for what we were. Companions. Friends. Two people just trying to find something good in our hellish lives. Seems that was a rather short-lived plan. Thanks to me.

I opened my mouth once again so say I was sorry for what my stupid actions made her do, but shut it again knowing it was pointless. She was right, this was beyond apologies.
"I know I was stupid and should have listened to you. What happened can't be fixed or ignored but… I don't want to give up on… whatever this is. I think having this place and this time will do us a lot of good. I know it has me. I actually made it through this whole week of school without skipping. Almost." Today was the exception but I wasn't about to put that blame on her. I looked forward to seeing her so much I didn't think about when I could skip out and where I would go when I did.
"I suppose I should praise you for that," I smiled played on her lips. I wished I could see it in the dark. "I want to hate you."

Well, that took a turn.

"But the truth is, I've felt a lot better since I ran into you in the principal's office. You made me laugh." I could see the flash of her white teeth as her smile broadened. "I hadn't laughed in a long time before then. I almost didn't remember what it was like not to be invisible. A lot changed for me since then." She paused and I could hear her swallow. "I used to… hurt myself. It felt like it was the only way I was capable of feeling anything. I was in a dark and dangerous place for a long time and then I started thinking about our run-ins in the hallways at school and some of the ridiculous things you would say and the light started to peek in."
My body was so stiff at attention taking in this brand new information about Meghan I was pretty sure I stopped breathing. I never noticed any cuts or scars on her arms before that indicated she was harming herself, but that didn't mean she wasn't doing it somewhere less visible. She had enough bruises on her that I could have missed it.
"I don't want this to be the end either," she continued, "I am just afraid of the risk involved."

I thought about her drugging her parents and agreed that was a high risk action to take in order to meet me there at the fort. If they were to wake up before she made it back to her bed, things could take an even worse turn.
"Okay. Then I won't meet you here. We can just leave it at school for a while. Your stepdad can't do anything about us talking at school." It was a reasonable compromise. I did kind of intrude on her personal space anyway; she'd just been gracious enough to agree to share. But maybe going back to our roots would work out better.
Meghan nodded, her eyes lowering in agreement with our new arrangement. "I wish it could be more. I like spending time with you."
"Me too. But it's my fault things need to be this way. I'll see if I can switch my lunch period. Then maybe we can still have this time together." All we did was talk, but sometimes that's all a person really needed to get through the hard times. When you lived lives like we did with parents you couldn't turn to with your problems because they were your problems, a close friend and confidant was a real lifeline. That's what Meghan and I became for each other.

"Okay." Meghan stood. I did the same. We looked at each other for a moment before she stepped forward and, to my surprise, wrapped her arms around me. I returned the gesture, holding her close to my body, cocooning her in my arms as I wanted to do the night before. She pressed her face to my shoulder, tightening her grip. I let her without doing the same, afraid of agitating her bruised ribs. Instead I used my hand to brush delicately through her hair, leaning my cheek against her temple. The moment felt so right for a lot of reasons I couldn't recognize. I didn't realize then that I was falling for the girl in my arms, but I knew I didn't want to lose her friendship or presence for anything. She was important to me in ways it would take me years to figure out and I was important to her in ways I would never get the chance to understand.